Chapter Eighteen

Trinity

In just three weeks, everything changed. Or maybe it’s more accurate to say, in three weeks, everything was taken from us.

Three weeks to say goodbye to the life we’d built. Three weeks to pack up our existence, making sure our most precious belongings were safe. Three weeks to vanish without a trace. I liked to think of it as hitting Control Alt Delete on our lives.

Some people in the witness protection program have time to prepare for their new lives. Others, like us, have to make the decision in a heartbeat. The marshals who show up aren’t the ones you’ve been talking to. They’re strangers, people you don’t know or trust, who barely say a word to you.

Family members often join the program, too. In our case, that meant Stephen and our kids. The program requires you to leave everything behind—parents, siblings, assets, identity. It’s a tough choice: join the program and maybe never return to your old life, or stay and risk losing your life altogether.

Stephen and I weren’t willing to gamble with our children’s lives.

The program chooses the relocation sites, but families can pick from a few options. Only a handful of people in the program know the final location. In our case, that included Lachie’s FBI team, who were in touch with Benji. He was supposed to keep Clint’s family and Luke and Todd updated, no matter what the program said.

Before the move, we were given new identities, complete with social security cards, birth certificates, driver’s licenses, and hastily fabricated credit histories and school and medical records. We hadn’t picked our new identities yet, but we knew we’d have to be practical.

I’d finished packing the kids’ stuff for the trip. The rest of our belongings had been moved a week ago, under the guise of a charity donation. We weren’t taking furniture, just clothes and essentials. We had to be careful about when we moved things, because the CPD was watching us.

Last night, we’d gone out for dinner with Luke and Todd. No one knew that the real purpose of the dinner at Capulet was to hand over the business keys to them. They were going to help Benji run things while we were gone, and we’d arranged to compensate them for their help.

It was hard for me. For nearly a decade, it had always been Luke and me. The thought of not knowing when I’d see him again was unbearable, but I knew we’d find our way back to each other.

After dinner, we went home for an early night. We were being woken at 2:30 a.m. to move out.

So here we were, on the day our lives were going to change, probably forever. Stephen and I hadn’t slept. We’d spent the night on our patio, smoking, drinking, and comforting each other while our kids slept upstairs.

We reminded ourselves that we were doing this for their future, to protect them, to protect our family, and to protect our love. As the time for our departure drew closer, I turned to Stephen, taking his hands in mine.

“Whatever happens from here,” I told him, “you are my true love, Stephen. I’ve never known true love until I met you. I will always be yours, and you will always have my heart.”

“The first time I saw you,” he said, “I knew I was going to love you for the rest of my life.”

“Really?” I asked. “We barely spoke.”

“I remember every word,” he said.

“Wait, which time are you talking about?”

“Baby, we only met for the first time once. You were at the bar in Gilhooley's. You’d just ordered your drinks and were heading back to your booth.”

“And I walked straight into you because I wasn’t looking.”

“Well, I may have been standing a little close, too. Your scent was intoxicating.”

I blushed, and he reached out to stroke my cheek. We looked deep into each other’s eyes.

“I remember your hands on my chest,” he said. “My heart was racing as I felt your fingers move across my muscles.”

I straddled his lap, placing my hands on his chest. He gripped my hips.

“Like this?” I asked. “If I remember correctly, I felt every inch of your hands on my hips, too.”

“Exactly like this. Then you looked up at me, and that was the moment I knew. I was so lost in you, I barely heard you apologize.”

“I remember I didn’t let go of you right away, and then—”

“You apologized again and took your hands off me. It was agonizing when I had to let go of you. Then I heard one of my business colleagues behind me and remembered I had a meeting. But I knew I was going to find you again. That’s why I told you. I needed you to know.”

“I was so aware of you for the rest of that night. I’m so glad you didn’t give up, baby.”

“Come here, baby. I love you. We’ll be okay, I promise. I will fight for you, for our children, until my dying breath. Nothing will ever be as important to me as you are.”

My husband pulled me closer and kissed me just as the doorbell rang. We looked at the clock.

2:30 a.m. Our lives were about to change.

“Mr. and Mrs. Gotti, are you ready to move out?” a marshal asked.

“Yes,” Stephen said. “Could you tell us now where we’re going?”

“Yes, you’re going to...”