Small Steps to Recovery

LAUREN

The ride home felt like a blur. Mason sat in the driver seat with his hand resting reassuringly on my leg. His touch was the only thing holding me together.

The police had tried to question us about Ginny, but Mason, in his usual stubborn fashion, refused to let them take up any more of our time.

“I’m taking her home,” he had said, his voice firm, leaving no room for argument.

And that was that. We were allowed to leave.

As we pulled into the driveway, everything felt heavy again. My chest, my legs, my thoughts. It was all too much.

The moment we stepped through the door, I felt like I was going to collapse from the weight of it all. The loss of my father was still fresh, a gaping wound.

I needed to clean myself off. I still had his blood on my hands and clothes. The sight of it made me relive it all over again, holding him as he died. I dropped to my knees on the floor, sobbing.

Mason was immediately next to me, holding me and rubbing my back.

“I’m here,” he said. “Just tell me what you need.”

“I need to shower,” I said. “I’m covered in his… his…

I couldn’t bring myself to say the words. To make it all real.

Without hesitation, Mason scooped me up into his arms, lifting me effortlessly, and I didn’t fight it. The exhaustion was too overwhelming. As he carried me down the hallway, I opened my eyes, glancing at him.

“It’s okay, you can take me to my room.”

His response was immediate, firm yet soft.

“This isn’t just my room anymore,” he said. “It’s ours. From now on, we will share it together. We will share everything together. Including your pain.”

I felt so tired I nuzzled against his chest as he walked into the master bathroom. Without breaking a sweat he held me with one arm and used the other to reach out to run on the hot water in the shower.

He gently helped me undress, carefully removing each layer and folding them neatly.

“I don’t want to see those clothes anymore,” I blurted out.

“I understand Lauren,” he said. “I’m going to help you into the shower and then I’m going to get rid of them. Don’t worry.”

I nodded. I let him guide me under the hot water. It felt so cleansing, like it was burning away all the memories my body was still holding onto.

I watched as the water ran across my body. The water turned a bright red, but slowly began to run clear once more. Only then did I think about getting out from under the water.

By then, Mason had returned. He sat just outside the shower, keeping an eye on me and making sure I wasn’t alone. Just his presence made me feel better.

He seemed to anticipate my every move. As I thought to reach to turn off the water, he was already there shutting it off with a clean towel in hand.

He helped me dry off and get into my pajamas.

My heart fluttered when his fingers grazed my skin, despite everything. I let him carry me into his bedroom. ~Our~ bedroom.

He laid me down on the bed with such care. He pulled the blankets over me, his touch gentle. For the first time in what felt like forever, I exhaled, my body sinking into the mattress, surrendering to the overwhelming need for sleep.

Mason stood over me, his presence steady, and for a moment, the chaos of everything faded into the background. There was only him, and me, and this quiet, fragile moment.

“Please stay with me until I fall asleep,” I said.

Without a word, he climbed into bed next to me, pressing his warmth against me. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me to his chest. He rubbed my back up and down as he held me close. Only then was I able to fall into a restful sleep as our breathing slowly began to synchronize.

***

I woke to the sound of soft knocks on the door, barely audible but enough to pull me from the haze of sleep. I blinked, my mind still heavy with grief and exhaustion, and instinctively reached out across the bed. Mason wasn’t there.

The knocking came again, and then a voice followed, familiar, gentle.

“It’s me.”

Beth.

Relief washed over me as I called out, “Come in.”

The door creaked open, and she stepped inside, her face etched with concern. Without a word, she crossed the room and sat down beside me, pulling me into a warm, comforting hug.

Her arms felt like home. She was practically the only family I had left now, the only person who had known my father truly.

“I’m so sorry for your loss, Lauren,” she whispered, her voice breaking the silence in the most tender way. “Vincent was an amazing father. And an amazing person.”

At her words, the floodgates opened. I hadn’t cried like this yet, but now, with Beth here, the tears came in a torrent. She held me tighter, letting me weep against her shoulder, not saying anything, just being there for me.

Beth had always been an amazing friend to me and now was no different. She was my rock whenever I was unsteady and I loved her because of it.

“You’re going to be okay,” she said softly, after a while. “I promise you that. I’ll always be here for you. And now… now you have Mason too.”

I nodded. She was right. Mason had saved me, not just physically, but emotionally as well. He made sure that I was strong and when I felt weak, he was there to help me.

Beth’s presence, her steady reassurance, gave me hope. It gave me the hope that I would survive and continue to make good on the promise I made to my father.

Beth pulled back from the hug, brushing a tear from my cheek.

“You know, he’s the one who reached out to me,” she said.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“Mason was so worried about you last night, he told me you were talking in your sleep,” she said. “He called me and told me you needed a friend. He really cares about you Lauren, more than you know.”

I nodded my head. I was only now coming to understand Mason’s true feelings. So much of what he felt he kept hidden away, but now he was willing to show them to me.

“I’m really glad Mason’s here to take care of you now,” she said, her tone warm but somewhat hesitant.

There was something unspoken behind her words, something she wasn’t telling me. I could see it in the way her eyes darted to the side for just a second, like she was holding back.

I tilted my head, frowning.

“Beth, what’s going on? You know you can tell me anything.”

She smiled, but there was a flicker of guilt behind it.

“I didn’t want to overwhelm you with everything… with everything that’s been happening.”

I sat up straighter, gently pushing the blankets aside.

“You’re my best friend. You can’t keep things from me, especially not now. What is it?”

Beth hesitated for a moment, then let out a small sigh.

“I, um… I got a promotion at work.”

I blinked, waiting for the rest. That wasn’t the kind of news that would make her hesitate. “That’s amazing! Why didn’t you—”

“It’s more than that,” she cut me off, biting her lip. “I’m supposed to move to the U.S. for it.”

I stared at her, speechless. For a few moments, I couldn’t process what she had just said. Beth, my rock, my best friend moving halfway across the world? When everything around me felt like it was falling apart already?

I wasn’t entirely sure what to say, my mouth opening and closing, searching for words that wouldn’t come. I knew I had no place telling her what to do, but part of me wanted to hold onto something that brought me comfort.

Beth rushed to explain.

“I don’t have to take the offer. I can stay. You’re going through so much right now, and I—”

I cut her off, wrapping her in a tight hug before she could say anything more.

“No,” I whispered into her shoulder. “You’re not giving this up. I’m happy for you, Beth. You deserve this. And you’ve always been there for me, now it’s time for you to do what’s best for you.”

She pulled back just enough to look at me, her eyes glistening.

“Are you sure?”

I nodded firmly.

“Of course. I’ll be okay. You’ve been my rock for so long, and I love you for that, but you have to take this. I’m so proud of you.”

Beth’s smile returned, more genuine this time, and I could see the relief wash over her. “Thank you,” she whispered, squeezing my hand. “That means everything to me.”

Beth and I chatted for a little longer, the conversation lighter now, more like old times.

We talked about the logistics of her move, the new responsibilities she'd be taking on, and all the exciting possibilities that awaited her in the U.S.

I promised I’d visit as soon as she was settled. It felt good to focus on something positive for once, even if the thought of her leaving tugged at my heart.

When Beth finally had to go, I walked her to the front door.

“Thank you for coming,” I said, giving her one last tight hug. “I’m so happy for you, Beth. You deserve this more than anyone.”

She squeezed me back, her voice soft as she whispered, “I’m going to miss you so much.”

I pulled back and smiled.

“You won’t be able to get rid of me that easily. I’m already planning my first trip.”

Beth laughed, wiping away a stray tear before turning toward the door. As she stepped out, she called over her shoulder, “Bye, Mason! Take good care of her!”

Mason’s voice echoed from the kitchen, “Always.”

When the door clicked shut behind her, I stood there for a moment, letting the quiet settle. The weight of everything that had happened started pressing down on me again. It was like the bubble of comfort that Beth had brought with her had popped, leaving me alone with my thoughts once more.

I took a deep breath and turned toward the kitchen, my steps slow but purposeful. When I walked in, Mason was leaning against the counter, his arms crossed, watching me. His eyes softened when they met mine, but I could see the tension in his posture. He knew something was coming.

“We need to talk,” I said, my voice firm but quiet.

Mason straightened up, nodding.

“Yeah,” he replied, his tone serious. “We do.”