Chapter 55

Clarity RAVEN ” You are going to feel guilty , but we both know staying in this situation is hurting you all .

” He said softly .

I could feel how bad he felt saying that , but it was the truth .

” Putting aside everything … Let’s play a game .

I ask a question and you pick which one you would choose .

” He added , slapping his thigh as the idea popped in his head .

Putting aside everything … (Read Everyday Updated Chapters m.techkaushal.com) The curse included .

Because that was what I used to make myself feel better every time I felt guilty for how I was treating Damon , but that was not an excuse .

” Ok … ” I said , playing with the tab on my can .

” Now picture them both standing right there … Which one will you hug first ? ” I frowned as the answer came to me .

” Liam … because- ” ” We’re not justifying why here … Block that all out and just think about your instant answers , I don’t want any breaks , you have got to answer fast , ok ? Whoever comes to mind first .

” ” Ok .

” I groaned .

” Both are hurt in a battle with rogues ? Which one will you tend to first ? ” ” Liam .

” I said , feeling another flash of guilt through me .

No matter the answer , I still felt guilty .

” If you did something that they told you not to who will you confess to first ? ” On ” Damon . ” Who do you want to fuck ? ” ” Li – hey ! ” Taylor chuckled .

” Soo … You done it yet ? Details … now ! ” ” Stop it ! We haven’t !

” I said , blushing as I remembered what happened earlier .

Oh , my dear goddess , that was naughty ! Liam was naughty … That side of him ….

My heart skipped a beat and I pushed it away .

” Ok , then which one do you want to cuddle up to in bed ? ”

” Liam … ” ” Cuddle with over a movie ? ” ” Both ? ” I pouted .

” They both came to mind ! ” ” So something you would do with a friend .

” Taylor said .

” Ok … Out of curiosity , which one have you kissed ? ” ” Both , but Damon only once .

” I replied pouting ” Damn girl ! Dare I ask how many times you’ve kissed Liam ? ” He teased .

I sighed .

” It’s because Damon said- ” ” Stop justifying it , we are talking about your feelings here .

” He said softly , giving my hand a squeeze before dipping his fries into the ketchup .

I nodded , thinking about Damon once more .

Deep down , I knew who I favoured , but I hated myself for it .

“

There’s no guilt or shame in loving someone … It doesn’t make you bad to feel stronger for one over the other .

Can you imagine being with Damon and rejecting Liam ? “

Life without Liam ….

My heart clenched painfully and my eyes stung .

The fear of the curse and what if that becomes a reality … His words from earlier echoed in my mind ; ‘

when you are mine … ‘ I knew he could sense my hesitation … It hurt so damn much .

I was a n awful mate to both .

I placed my face in my hands as the tears came , no longer able to hold them back .

” Damn , I’m sorry Raven ! ” Taylor’s panicked voice came .

I shook my head , but I was unable to stop .

I knew what I had to do , but just thinking about it broke me .

I didn’t want to hurt him … I couldn’t hurt him ….

I sobbed loudly , clamping my hands over my mouth as I bent down , pressing my forehead to my knees as I tried to stop my tears .

(Read Everyday Updated Chapters m.techkaushal.com) Taylor’s arms wrapped around me and held me tight .

” Shit , I’m sorry Raven … I’m damn sorry … P ” Don’t be … You just made me realise I am doing more damage than good .

‘ I whispered through the link .

He stroked my back and I felt ridiculous crying like this , but I realised all my life I just stayed quiet because it was easier .

We couldn’t do this anymore , I couldn’t do this anymore .

I wanted all my firsts to be special , not constantly worrying about what the other might be thinking or the fact that I kept feeling guilty .

” I’m going to say this to myself as much a s to you , ” Taylor said , kissing the top of m y head .

” Life isn’t perfect or easy … The stories of soul mates and their eternal love are only sugar – coated versions of reality .

Look at those power couples around us … Alpha Elijah and Luna Scarlett’s , sure we know them as this amazing couple who love each other deeply and have the chemistry to die for … but they did not have it easy – even on their journeys , there were difficulties .

We need to create our own love stories , overcome our differences , issues and hardships to make them perfect … but also remember that we need to get to that perfect part .

To remember that the pain we’re feeling right now is part of that journey , a part we need to overcome … ” I nodded as I tried to steady my breathing and calm down .

” I know … You’re right … I’m scared knowing I might hurt someone and knowing that I’m already hurting Damon , Liam … Myself … (Read Everyday Updated Chapters m.techkaushal.com) ” I know , baby girl , but that’s life and you are one badass queen who has got this .

” I wish I could tell him I was just an ordinary wallflower , not a badass queen … But he’s being sweet , so I won’t argue .

” I’m tired … tired of it all .

” I whispered .

” It’s OK to be .

” He replied .

I pulled away slightly and looked at him with a tilt of my head .

” So … What about you ? ” I asked , wiping m y tears away .

He looked down .

” I need to talk to Channing .

He deserves t o know … but I have been delaying it .

” He said , his eyes pained .

” I’m sorry .

” I whispered .

” Don’t be , I’ll figure it out .

” He comforted me .

I nodded and took a deep breath .

” Ok , we are going to do what we need to d ” 1 0.

I said with renewed determination , feeling a lot better after crying and talking to him .

He gave me a small smile and nodded .

” Yeah … We will .

” We had cleared up the takeaway boxes and had settled down , nibbling at the cotton candy when Liam’s voice came through the link , making my cheeks burn at the memory of earlier .

‘

Raven ? ‘ ‘ Yeah ? ‘ I asked , my heart thumping .

‘ Your father’s trial is this coming Monday .

Are you ok with testifying openly or privately … ? ‘ My heart skipped a beat , so he was actually listening to Uncle El .

I felt so happy about that .

I smiled softly .

” I can do it openly .

” I said , my heart thumping , but I needed to be brave .

I knew the pack were probably already talking about me behind my back with the entire two – mate situation , but I would not let it put me down .

If Liam was willing to d o this by trial , something he didn’t want t o do , then I would also testify .

‘

I’m willing to do so at the trial .

‘ I said softly .

‘ Perfect … So , uh … What are you up to ? ” He asked , I smiled at the awkwardness in his tone .

” Thinking about you and playing with myself ? ‘ I said as seriously as possible .

(Read Everyday Updated Chapters m.techkaushal.com)

His pause of silence made me unable to hold back my laughter .

‘ Haha did I make you blush ? ‘ ‘ I don’t blush .

‘ Came his reply , but I could tell he was pouting .

‘ But I know how to make you blush .

‘ ‘ Oh , don’t play that with me , blue eyes .

‘ I said , glad he wasn’t here in person .

I’m a t Taylor’s ! You are disturbing me ! ‘ Cool , enjoy , but one last thing … I didn’t expect you to have a Brazilian wax .

It’s really sexy … I like it .

Scratch that , I fucking love it and it’s a damn turn on .

‘ My eyes flew open , my cheeks burning at his words and I wasn’t able to reply .

His chuckle came through the link .

‘ Have fun .

‘ Came his triumphant farewell , leaving me red – faced and completely speechless ! Moonlight Muse Author Thank you for reading !!