Just a Story part 2

"You did what?"

"I asked her out" I mumble

"Do you know her name?" Koji raised a brow

"No" I say meekly

"So just some barista?"

"Shop owner" I correct

"Perfect. Then tell me the name and I will do the proper background check"

"Koji is that really necessary?" I huff

"I just wanna look out for you. You're a pro hero, what if she's just using you? What if she has a criminal record? She could be working with a villainous organization"

"Fine, but leave me out of it" I sigh, "I don't want any part of your digging. I don't need another date thinking I'm creepy cause I know a little too much"

"Suit yourself" Koji shrugged

That was the end of that. He updated me they were clear so I didn't need to worry. Though the day before the worry came anyway.

"What if it happens again?" I mumble

"You are really flip flopping about this NOW?" Koji raised a brow

"What the hell was I thinking? It's only been a few months-"

"Its been 8 months. This is a perfectly reasonable time to go back to dating"

"What if I'm not ready? What if she is bad? Or-"

"My research says she-"

"No, don't tell me I don't wanna have her think I'm a stalker"

Koji glared but sighed heavily, "She's a good person. That's all I'll say"

"Oh god, what if I'm not good enough?" I panic

I hear a thunk as Koji smacked himself with his clipboard, "says the man who is a LITERAL CELEBRITY"

"But what if I'm broken? I don't know if I can love again. What if I can't provide emotional support? Or if i...oh God what if I can no longer perform?? What if I have a panic attack if she even tried to kiss me??"

Koji stalked over to my desk to look me in the eye, "You won't know till you try. I'm sure they would understand and you just need to be yourself"

I relax with a chuckle, "Where did you pick up that canned crap?"

"Does it matter if it made you feel better?"

"I guess you're right"

Koji adjusted his glasses looking smug, "Of course, I'm always right"

"You're an ass is what you are" I scoff shaking my head

"You're just jealous I got a better ass than you, you pancake"

That made me laugh. Koji really does know how to cheer me up.

Though the next day as I came into work I realized I should return the favor, "Hey, you doing ok?"

Koji lifted his head from his desk looking defeated, "I will be but...we seriously need to talk"

"Is this about my date?" I sit down on the desk

"No...look. An invite came in the mail"

"Ok?" I raise a brow adjusting my hair feeling like I may have gone overboard trying to style it when I know it's going to just be a mess as usual after work

"I can't find the words to put this nicely but... do you remember Zeus?"

"Yeah, he was a good friend for a while. We do a lot of shoots together when people do mythical shoots. He's a nice guy. Little narcissistic having his hero name be after a god but eh" I shrug

"Well, you were invited to be a groomsmen at his wedding"

"Holy shit! That's amazing. Who's the lu...cky....lady" I lose my words as they fell. Hana. Of course.

"Im guessing you already put it together?"

"Is...is he going to be there?" I mumble

"He is her brother" Koji sighed

"I...I don't think I can do it"

"Look, I'm going too. It's a few months away, he has no reason to approach you"

"I...I don't think I could stomach looking at him. I don't think you understand. I don't know if I'd kill him or I'd just kill myself man I-"

"Hey hey hey, it's ok. Calm down. This is months out. We'll figure it out. Who knows, if things work out for you, you may have someone special to focus on instead?"

"Who the he-"

"You're back out there keigo. Remember your date today? Don't let this ruin it" Koji smiled

"Koji...I can't just sweep this under the rug. I don't know what I'm going to do... you know what he did to me" I mumble losing my voice as I spoke.

My chest feels tight. I feel like my heart itself is clenching.

"Relax. This is all in the future. He could not even show up for all we know. I just wanted to prepare you. I see now I probably should have been more tactful"

"I should cancel" I mumble

"Cancel? Cancel what?"

"My date. I'll just be a bummer"

"No no no" Koji shook my shoulders, "You go on that date. You and that girl really hit it off right? This is a once in a lifetime thing. Have fun. There is no pressure. And hey, if it doesn't work out it'll be fun at least"

"But... what if I freak out? She doesn't need some guy in shambles. Maybe I should just focus on myself. I should be better before going out there again"

"Dude. There isn't ever going to be a perfect time. You just need to get out there and do it. You can still work on yourself even in a relationship. Just cause you are with someone doesn't mean you stop improving"

"I just don't want to put that pressure on her" I sigh

"You don't need to. See eachother casually. You can gradually talk about it with her when you are ready. You don't need to open up right away with all this shit" Koji pat me on the shoulder, "Just don't stress it.  Focus on having fun and getting to know eachother on the base level"

"You're right...ok. I'll do that" I smile

(I'm just gonna plop this cause ouchy it really hurt to write)