Stained

I logged off. A cigarette butt lying down with weak smokes. I shook my head. The lights were dim, the night had fallen off the sky.

I skimmed through another book, some Aesop Fables trying to find one to relate through the night. I could find none.

I ate dinner alone. With the much silent surrounding and the inconvenience of loneliness I looked at the outstretched sky. So easily I am ready to give up something. Have I not even desired him? To the Lord in the Heaven; why are you upset of me. That you wouldn't grant me the things I want, without an ask. Why do I have beg for things and yet you leave me empty handed,with if something than only despair running through my fingers.

I rolled up the white Lily in my palm and took in the sweet fragrance.

Who decides what is fair anyways?

I sat in the library. I watched the small blue insect humming a strange tune. I saw the yellow stain of coffee on the white plain sheets kept on the table. I saw the books in the shelf stare at me. I recalled the memories of when I first entered here. The infamous speech that left me speechless. I wrapped arms around myself. It was indeed cold.

A servant entered "The Master calls for you in his room"

My heart started beating fast.

"Why? " I questioned wearing my slippers.

He did not answer. I followed him to Mr Elahim's room. I took a deep breath.

The servant walked down.

I closed my eyes tightly, he intimidates me. Why have I been called?  What makes me so nervous?

_*_*_*_*_

I opened the mail by Fathimah,it was four past five in the morning.

25 November  2016

Have you could dare make a joke like this?

Are you crazy?

Text me back.

You're joking aren't you?

I was not in the pyche to ever make jokes now.

I read the plain sheet for the entire time till the sun rose again and pricked my eyes. The night after the Falaq. Seems unnatural to me today. My feet are swollen,I was standing the entire night. I did not let the crisp air talk to me.

After several calls to attend the breakfast, I dragged myself with one foot to the table. I did not look into anybody's eye.

I felt guilty.

Al-Wildan poked me his fork but I was dead to skin. Dead to bones. Dead to souls.

Mr Elahim sat and cleared his throat rather cheerfully.

The last bit of life fall off my skin like autumn leaves.

My respiration expired but somehow I was alive.

The servant asked for my plate, I heard him but unable answer I was fixed in an action.

Then he was heard saying "Miss, your plate? "

Mr Elahim roared "You foolish servant, She is Lady, Lady Elahim! "

I could sense all eyes turn to me, wild cold shivers ran into my spine. I was parellel to a corpse with immortal feelings. Oh how I wish I was rather dead.

When I was convinced I had no tears left to spare to this day, a rude water pearl dropped from my eyes. I rubbed it away.

"Lady? " Al-Shizad comprehends.

"Yes, indeed. Here raise a toast to the First Lady Elahim!"

The unaccomplished breath broke away my ankles. I closed my eyes as the the stubborn deadly night flashed before my eyes!

I entered with scared steps proceeding to his Large and Whiteroom. His curtains heavily falling on the tall windows and smear of gold painted along the beautiful designs on the ceiling and walls. The private library alike Al-Wais's at the side. I saw Mr Elahim sitting against the large burgundy table on his gold and red Royal arm chair.

"Come inside" his voice ordered.

I stepped before the table.

"Sit" he demanded.

I sat on the small brown round chair at the side.

"Now, Maiden;We have a lot to decipher" he cross smiled.

My heart shrunk in fear.

"Maiden, do you want to hear a story? " he asked.

I gulped.

"Well, I would tell you a tale.

Many years ago in the South City Hall they use to hold Elite Ballroom parties. It was the foundation where all the young aristocrats could come and acquaint themselves with the ladies of the same league. I met Mrs Liya-Arae Hareem in that Ball. Every ounce of what people dream of, I had it. In our time,love wasn't something to earn, it was a dire need, to live for and with. Now I'll tell about my wife, she was as beautiful as a white Lilly, she was delicate and oh Maiden, you haven't ever had seen such beautiful blue eyes in your life. I had choked on my thoughts, I've read a great deal but that day I did not have words to speak. Like I had lost all ability; when I saw her put her finger in her curls and swirl them. She was right there, I approached her and I assumed that would be difficult to pursue her but nothing was as easy as putting her and me into us.  We read the same books, we Sang the same songs, we ate the same food. We weren't similar but we loved each other's taste. She would explore my views and I, hers. It did not even took me three hours to understand that she wasn't only about her peach skin, blue eyes. She was Sharp. Oh how I'd die for a Lady like that, oh how I died for a Lady like that" Suddenly the tenderness on his face dissappeared between the tight grit of his teeth.

"We were so in Love. In a month we were married. In the City, I bought her the highest apartment. She loved Lilies, I bought her a garden of lilies. She was my everything. I never had my father or mother as my role models, they were cynical. They never loved each other. I had never seen love and so I desired it utterly. When I married her, I promised myself to never fight her......to never be the embodiment of my father's sly remarks or mother's complaint.

When Al-Wais was born all was good.

But then she decided that it no longer should be good. That she should have me fail on the oaths I had taken. We fought. She threatened to leave me, to leave my home and run away. I could not be like my father, I would not let her go. So I brought her into this Royal Mansion, away from her envious company. Here in Dar-Al-Maqamah where she could rule like a Queen. She brightened up here. Everything, everything.... Oh tell me a thing that I had denied her. I bought every single thing she dreamt of.

We had Al-Souffian. Things were alright. We had Al-Hassan, oh she was delighted when he was born. He looks just like her,doesnt he? I hate him. He looks just like her, he is just like her, he is her" his nostrils flaring up in hate of his own son. The son he hates because he looks like his wife.

He sighed.

"Nothing could keep her. Nor money, nor lifestyle,nor promises, nor her kids, nor love. She did not want more children. We still had our twins. She was displeased at the news. She told me she'd rather throw them away. Cruel, ridiculous woman. Then she pretended to stay but ultimately she ran away with the bl**dy servant. Women. Women are disgusting. They take away everything, like soul snatchers. She dissaperred and she hasn't even for once had returned to see if her two year old sons had survived her betrayal!"

He was mourning in anguish. He was hurling like a wild storm. He was roaring like a flame of the merciless volcano.

"Now Maiden, hear me carefully. I had returned all the affections I had for this women to my sons. My sons should be pure. I have worked hard day and night so I can see them so and you are spoiling my most beloved with yourself "

The echo of his voice raced like trumpet inside me. I held my breath.

"You, the poor and obscure. With neither beauty nor character. I must admit you have a lot of confidence because after being however so  ill-flavoured you happen to trap my son"

I shook my head. He smiled.

"No, you did. It's not all your fault;he always had a bad taste of women. That Moroccan girl incident had cautioned me beforehand but I thought he must have grown. Poor taste..... You are shamelessly yourself. Brave,I admit. Now since you have crossed the line, I would help you go further. Award you...with what you want. Here"

He placed the projector on the table. The white walls projected the pictures of his five sons. I looked at Al-Wais. Why did you go away?

His picture disappeared.

I looked at him. Scared, vulnerable and broken.

"You shall marry any of my son.... Except Al-Wais of course"

I shook my head, I rose to my feet. I wanted to speak but my throats were jammed. My eyes rained ,my lungs filled with utmost hurt. I cried ....i cried "No.... No..."

He pouted at the pictures. Al-Shizad and Al-Wildan were also subtracted.

"you call them your brother, don't you? So you have a choice between Al-Souffian and Al-Hassan "

"No!  I do not want to marry anybody!  Please, I want to leave! "I stormed out of the chair and opened the door.

"Oh pity, poor Father!  I would be compelled to seal his bank account. I would have to fire him,we have to end on bad terms,oh it saddens me"

I turned disgusted by his threat.

"You cannot threaten me into this marriage!"

"Oh I can. I can do anything. I can burn down your dear dad's library. I am use to burning down things" he burnt a paper with his cigar.

"Please, I beg you. I cannot do this!  You have mistaken me. There is nothing between me and Al-Wais!"

I limped with my words.

"But he is in love with you. I demand him to be perfect. Void of all the bad things. You have stained him. Like Miss Rosalind Mattews stained Al-Hassan. Faulty..... Al-Hassan like her mother, oh proving he is not like her but always gloomy like her mother. Stained in Scarlett"

"I will leave,you would never ever see me again. I would runaway far... I would.... Please.... "I was desperate for an apology.

"that is exactly what Miss Rosalind said before our deal, that she'd never return but love is a funny thing Maiden. Like her, you would always return,if not physically but in his dreams, in his actions, you would imbibe yourself in him when you would leave and then his eyes would carry you throughout his life. That was one mistake I did with Al-Hassan and I would never repeat it. You are to marry and live here with my Son,any of this two so that I can always Al-Wais Perfect, Stainless and pure. You would marry any of the two and Al-Wais is to never look at you again. Praise me. Oh how I wonder Maiden that you would at least be of good features, after all you are being granted the privilege to be An Elahim!"

I cried on my knees. "I beg you, leave me for the sake of Allah, let me go! "

"Let you go?  Let you go... Let you go!  I saw you last night with my son and I broke the vase because I could not scream how awful it looked!  You sly women!  Dare!  How dare you!" he screamed and the voice echoed in the room.

"For the sake of Allah?  Please.... "

He brought out a sand timer.

"Your time is running. Here are my order waiting below my tongue to roll out and when fell out Maiden, they would fall on your family. I would destroy everything. I swear on Allah that if you walk out of this door today unmarried. I shall break every single strand that your father holds on"

I stood upright. Wiped the salty tears flowing off my face. I looked at the wall. Had I not known his stories, he is merciless. My heart was aching. I had to choose.

The mighty build wall showcasing my future. My sobs melting into my breath outbreaking ache. I cried helplessly looking ahead of me.

"please " I returned to him.

"Go on, be the same kind of brave"

I looked at Al-Souffian, his skin pale and red circles below his eyes. His mystic gaze, his comprehending shoulders. Unreliable. The stately stare. His moonlids, half closed eyes. Tired of God knows what.

Al-Hassan, his brightened skin, his texture of smile. A gloomy shoulder. The signature sombre countenance. The much more deeper than surface,the kind..... But extremely beautiful..... Blue eyes, peach skin. My eyes were fixed on him. His spectacular making.

"have you made your choice? "

Mr Elahim asked in his loud cruel voice.

"Yes" I said without a voice.

Author's note : I hope you haven't died. Also feedback is compulsory. Jokes apart I'm so nervous for this one. But Who decides what is fair anyways?