Abhimanyu
I couldnât breathe.
The weight on my chest felt unbearable, crushing, like something inside me was unraveling faster than I could hold it together. My hands were shaking, my vision blurring at the edges, and my throat burned as if I had swallowed fire.
Subhi was still staring at me, her eyes filled with something unreadableâshock, sadness, maybe even regret. But none of it mattered. Because once I started, I couldnât stop.
âYou want to know why I am like this?â My voice came out strangled, uneven. My nails dug into my palms, but even the pain couldnât ground me. âYou want to know why I keep pushing you away?â
Subhi opened her mouth, but I didnât let her speak. The words were clawing their way out of me now, raw and unstoppable.
âMy sister,â I gasped, my breathing turning shallow. âShe died. Right in front of me.â
The moment I said it, something inside me cracked wide open. A rush of memories flooded in, drowning meâthe blaring horns, the screeching tires, the way she had smiled at me just moments beforeâbeforeâ
My vision swam.
âIââ My voice broke, and my legs felt weak. I squeezed my eyes shut, my entire body trembling. âI could have saved her. I should have saved her. But I didnât.â
The lump in my throat was unbearable now. My chest heaved as I fought to keep control, but it was slippingâeverything was slipping.
âMy fatherâ¦â My voice barely came out, choked, broken. âHe blames me. And heâs right. I blame myself too. I let her die, and I can neverââ My breath hitched violently.
And then it happened. The tears I had buried for years finally broke free. My shoulders shook, my hands clenched into fists, and before I knew it, I was gasping for air, completely unraveling in front of her.
Subhiâs eyes widened in alarm. I could see itâthe panic, the desperation to do something.
âAbhimanyu,â she whispered, stepping closer.
âNoââ I tried to move back, to push her away, to stop myself from falling apart any further. But then she grabbed my wrist.
And suddenly, I was shaking too hard to stop her.
She didnât hesitate. In one swift movement, she pulled me toward her, wrapping her arms around me, holding me as if she could physically keep me from breaking.
I stiffened for a second, my mind screaming at me to move away, to push her back, to run. But I couldnât.
Because the moment she held me, I felt something snap inside me completely.
A ragged, broken sob tore out of my throat, and before I could stop myself, I collapsed into her.
I gripped the back of her shirt with trembling hands, burying my face against her shoulder, as if I could hide from the world. My body shuddered violently, years of pain, guilt, and silence finally pouring out in a way I couldnât control.
And Subhiâshe didnât let go.
She held me tighter, as if she knew I was falling apart and wasnât afraid to catch me. Her fingers pressed against my back, grounding me, steadying me.
âItâs not your fault,â she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper.
But I couldnât respond. I couldnât do anything except hold onto her like my life depended on it.
For the first time in years, I wasnât drowning alone.
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