45

"A simple smile. That's the start of opening your heart and being compassionate to others. "

– Dalai Lama

Bella's pov

I honestly am such a big mess. I can't believe that I kissed Xander, and that too in front of everyone. Now I have given him hope, and will end up hurting the person who genuinely cares about me.

All these feelings are so confusing. How can I love Jacob but still have these kind of feelings for Xander. What if all these feelings are just my pregnancy hormones, but I don't think that it is.

Because what I am starting to feel for him is more than physical attraction.

I feel comfortable around him, happy with him. I shouldn't feel this way about anyone besides Jacob but I do.

"Bell bell" I notice jake standing on my room's door. Having a worried expression on his face. I quickly wipe all my tears and gesture him to come sit next to me.

"Why are you sad?" He asks softly, "Nothing baby bro, I was just missing someone." I reply knowing that he understands what I am talking about.

"Bell bell, earlier when I saw you with Xan, you were happy. That made me happy too. I miss Jacob too, he was my friend too. But you told me once that those who die, look after us from heaven. That we need to be happy for them, we need to look after ourselves for them. I don't think Jacob would've liked to watch you like this bell bell. Please don't be sad, continue being happy with Xan." Jake explains all this to me like he is much older than me. I smile at him, he is a very special child, he is so mature, so good for his age.

I wipe all my tears again and smile to him, "I love you" I tell him and hug him. I hear him whisper softly "I love you too bell bell."

"I promise not to be sad from now on." I say and point my pinky finger in front of him which he holds in his and we make a promise.

"Are you excited to be an uncle?" I ask him, and watch his expression change completely, now full of excitement. "I am so excited bell bell. But I am also sad that I am small. What if I won't be able to take care of her or hold her properly." He asks.

"I am sure you'll be a great uncle to her jake. You are amazing, so mature for your age. Plus she'll love playing with you, you can even teach her so many things. It'll all be amazing." I answer him honestly. I know he'll be great with her, he is already so good with every single person. Honestly people misunderstand me as the perfect child, whereas jake is the one who deserves all these appreciations.

His face lights up when he hears what I just said, and instantly starts to plan what games he'll teach her. I watch my little brother being so excited about the baby, that I realize I should also be happy about this news. I shouldn't cry unnecessarily about things which are not in my control, I should celebrate the fact that I am having a daughter. I shouldn't think about things which can't happen or should've happened, I should be happy about things which are happening right now in this very moment.

He is little but yet he teaches me new things everyday.

After sometime the party gets officially over, everyone greets and congratulates me and then they all leave. And again it's just us here.

Xander's father hasn't been living here since we got married, and decided to live at another house he owns in this city. This doesn't bother Xander because even before he was like never here.

"Hey, I think you should rest now." Xander says, looking concerned.

"Xan I am sorry for breaking down like that before. It's just I was scared. I shouldn't have done that when I was the one who kissed you." I apologize to him for my behavior earlier today.

"It's fine Ella. You don't need to apologize to me ever, okay? You being happy is all that matters to me. You know I love you and I would love if you could give your feelings or me a chance, but I won't ever force you to do these like that Bella. It's all entirely up to you, I don't want you to feel that all this was some sort of plan of mine, that me marrying you was for another intention, because it wasn't. I truly care about you and our baby, and that's just my only intention." Xan confesses.

I can see that he is hurt, from my rejection earlier. I can see how serious he is about me, about our baby. How much he loves both of us.

I look into his eyes, and take a step closer.

"Ella are you okay?" He asks and I answer him by placing my lips on his.

Our lips move in a sync together, both of us kissing each other with passion. His soft lips touching mine, the kiss is full of passion but yet not harsh, not aggressive. He kisses me like I am the best thing that has happened to him, like he never wants to let go of me. Like he wants to show how much he loves me by kissing me.

We break apart, to breathe.

"I am ready to give us a chance." I say this to answer his confusion about the kiss and smile while looking straight into his eyes.

He smiles and this time he places his lips on mine.

——————-

I am so sorry to keep you'll waiting like that. I promise to update and complete this story as soon as possible. 💕

And a big thank you to all of you for reading this book, voting and commenting. All of this is so overwhelming to me, and means literally so much to me.

What are your thoughts about this chapter?

Keep supporting!!