NINETEEN

"And DAMN Dorothea...

They all wanna be ya!"

———

March 18th, 2018

Taylor, lost in the depths of sleep, suddenly woke at the feeling of something brushing against her neck. She blinked a few times, confused by her dim surroundings and the loud, white noise-like whoosh filling the air. It took a moment for her to remember that she was on a red-eye flight to LA.

And that Dorothea was fast asleep at her side.

Taylor looked down at the brunette and smiled. She observed how her chest rose and fell with each breath; her eyelashes fluttering as she navigated a world the blonde couldn't see. It was hard to imagine that inside of the girl who currently had her hands balled in the sleeves of her sweatshirt, knees folded against her chest and lavender polish beginning to chip on her fingernails, there was a tiny new life growing with each passing moment. In the coming months, it would become much more obvious, and now that they were back together Taylor wanted to be there for every second of it.

Now more than ever, her thoughts were constantly pulling her into a distant, dreamy image of her and Dorothea's future. Before meeting the Texas girl, her picture of the future sometimes included kids. Other times, none at all. Taylor loved the children in her life—such as those of her friends, Blake and Ryan—but it was hard to imagine where they would fit in the complicated puzzle of her own future, if she chose to have any. Given her career, there were pieces already in place for the next two years, and then there were those that were just missing. Or perhaps never in the box to begin with.

But thanks to the woman now sleeping peacefully at her side, she secured another piece of the puzzle. Or two.

God, did she hope that Dorothea felt the same way.

The brunette had immediately accepted the position as her second tour photographer, and the only response that Taylor could manage was a huge sigh of relief. On the drive from the airport to Dorothea's mother's house, she fretted over what to do if the opposite happened. The reality was, she would have begged; gotten down on her knees, whipped up some tears—though perhaps not in front of Heather—bought her the moon, whatever it took. But luckily, Dorothea was just as excited as she was by the opportunity (and judging by the squeal that escaped her and floated up to the chandelier like a melody destined for heaven, Taylor wasn't about to doubt it).

The few days Taylor spent in Dallas felt like an unauthorized escape. It seemed reckless to side-step her career and feel the hot southern sun blaze against her skin. Each day, Dorothea had taken her to a place from her past; her high school, the neighborhood park, the bar she swore had the best margaritas in the country—New York City's didn't compare!—, although, of course, she didn't partake. With each new place, it felt as though she was reading another page from the brunette's diary. Between the moments of exploring where the hazel-eyed girl's life had once led her, they shared new, exhilarating moments of their own. It was just the two of them, lost in a secret garden of magnolia trees and lemon iced-tea.

God, was it perfect.

Dorothea stirred against her, blinking as she opened her eyes. She immediately furrowed her eyebrows. "Huh—" She hummed, eyes landing on Taylor, "Oh!"

The blonde chuckled, "Forgot you're on a flight to LA?"

The younger woman mumbled something Taylor couldn't quite hear, then moved so she was resting against her. In addition to the loose strands of espresso hair that fell against the singer's shoulder, Taylor felt the shape of the girl's frame find its place against her own.

Taylor reached and draped her arm over the brunette. For a few minutes, the pair sat quietly as the hum of the plane filled the dim cabin. There were moments in the past several days where they each had so much to say, constantly talking over one another. But there were also just as many where they fell into comfortable silence.

Dorothea, eyes focused as though deep in thought, suddenly looked up at her. "What exactly are we doing in LA again?" She asked.

Taylor laughed. "Mostly rehearsal for the tour. I have one performance for James Corden's show and if there's any extra time, I might spend a few hours in the studio," she explained.

Dorothea nodded. "And what am I doing?"

Taylor laughed again. "We're creating a book with rehearsal photos that we'll sell along with the merch on the website, so I think that'll keep you busy. You can also join me on any of the other things I've mentioned, or just go on an adventure and explore LA. Don't feel like I'm holding you hostage."

The younger woman smirked. "I actually don't know much about LA. The only time I went was to visit my Aunt Betty and cousin Ian when I was nine. All I remember is eating my body weight in cotton candy at Disneyland."

"Oh god, just the idea of that makes my teeth want to fall out,"

"Pretty sure I was sick for almost a week after that. Speaking of which," Dorothea added, grimacing as she shifted in her seat.

"What's wrong?" Taylor asked, frowning.

The brunette shook her head dismissively. "Just my stomach being ax-murdered. Nothing new." She laughed.

"You've been sick almost every day," the older woman noted, "are you sure that's normal?"

"I guess it is for me." Dorothea shrugged.

"Sorry, I wish there was something I could do to help," she sighed, rubbing the other girl's arm. "Other than offering you ginger ale and saltines sixty times a day."

"Do you want to be pregnant instead?" Dorothea looked up at her and grinned.

"Hard pass. I'll stick with crackers and soda duty."

"Ouch."

"I'll just pretend that you're saying that to your stomach."

"And I'll pretend that I'm all by myself at Disneyland, stuffing myself with cotton candy and peanut butter cup ice cream," Dorothea countered, smiling to herself.

"Peanut butter cup ice cream?"

"It's all I want right now,"

Taylor laughed. "If you can wait three hours, I'll make it happen."

"Thank you." Dorothea repositioned herself against the blonde and sighed.

Taylor thought she was about to drift off, but instead the girl's hazel eyes shot back up to her's. She then said, "Do people know you're not straight?"

The question came from so far out of nowhere that Taylor burst with sudden, sharp laughter, causing the other girl to laugh as well. When she recovered after a moment, she sighed. "Not officially. Only my family and a few people very close to me do. But they've speculated."

"How so?"

"Mostly online. I guess it's a combination of the lyrics I've written and people the paps have caught me with. Although those photos don't prove anything," she explained, then smiled. "But I find it entertaining."

"So who of those people did you actually fuck?"

Taylor, once again blindsided by the girl's direct approach, only managed a stiff laugh. "Yeah, I'm gonna need a drink if we're having that conversation."

"Fair enough."

"And what about you?" Taylor prompted, tilting her head to look at the brunette, "Do 'people' know you're not straight?"

"Nope," Dorothea answered, "just you and my dad."

Taylor nodded, somewhat surprised. She thought Dorothea would have at least come out to her mother or sister, given how close they were. But it was her choice, and Taylor wasn't about to suggest otherwise.

Moments later, a quiet moan escaped the girl beneath her arm, diverting her attention. "Are you sure you're okay?" She frowned.

Instead of answering, Dorothea responded with a slow, curious smile. "Have you ever had sex on this thing?"

Once again, Taylor found herself almost speechless. She then cocked her head at the brunette. "No. Why do you ask?"

"Seems like the perfect opportunity. I don't know a better 'fuck-you' to the world than banging someone on your own private jet."

Taylor laughed. "Are you trying to tell me something?"

Dorothea hummed, turning in her seat so her back was cradled in the singer's side. "Yes, but I'm also too nauseous. So forget about it."

———

The plane landed in LA at around three in the morning, and thanks to emptying her stomach only minutes before, Dorothea was now starving. She hadn't forgotten about the ice cream, and now it was not just a craving, but absolutely necessary that she found a place open at that god-awful hour that sold that flavor. No exceptions. She was so set on that damn ice cream—you promised!—that she and Taylor got into an argument about it as they loaded their suitcases into the SUV parked next to the plane. It was ridiculous and had she not been so exhausted she would have laughed uncontrollably. But by now she also knew that whenever she played the Pregnancy Card, Taylor's sympathy followed.

And so now they were on a search at three in the morning for a place that sold peanut butter cup ice cream.

After almost thirty minutes driving north on the 405, they spotted a Circle K glowing in the distance off of the highway. Despite it being almost four in the morning, the place was scattered with Hollywood nightclub stragglers getting whatever food necessary to satisfy their intoxicated cravings. It was busy, and Taylor didn't think much of her potential for being spotted, but Dorothea insisted on going in alone to save her the risk.

While the brunette went into the convenience store in search of the coveted dessert, Taylor mindlessly scrolled through her phone. A few minutes passed, and she suddenly heard her cats getting restless in their carrier and decided to try and find the treats stashed in one of her suitcases. Without a second thought, Taylor popped the passenger door open and stepped out onto the pavement, heading towards the trunk.

"Hey! What are you doing out here?" Dorothea fretted as she arrived back at the car.

"Just trying to find the cat treats for the two divas," Taylor chuckled. She glanced at the white plastic bag in Dorothea's hand and nodded towards it. "Did they seriously have it?"

"Hell yeah." Dorothea beamed. She then stepped towards the blonde, her voice lowered, "I also got an extra spoon, if you're interested."

"You're ridiculous." Taylor zipped one of the suitcases, yet she couldn't help but smile as she looked at her. "But I will gladly accept your offer."

The two met each other's eyes, their backs glowing in the light of the store and gas station behind them. Perhaps it was Taylor's haunting smile, or the way Dorothea's eyes sparkled within their sleep-deprived redness. But a moment later they met one another's lips.

And that was also when several telescopic cameras simultaneously flashed to capture it.