5: Chapter 5

MARCO

Marco showed Ryan proudly around his enormous house: the pool, his office, a library, six different bedrooms, and seven bathrooms. He stopped at the largest bedroom. “You can either take this room, or sleep in mine; it’s just across the hall.”

“This one will be fine,” Ryan said quickly. “If you don’t mind, I’m going to lie down for a little while.” Marco could see that the exhaustion of the day was really hitting her now.

He nodded. “Of course. I’ll just bring your things up.”

He didn’t want to push her, so he left her alone and worked in his office for a few hours before making them an early dinner.

“Ryan?” He knocked on her door and when she didn’t answer, he slowly opened it. The bed was empty but he could hear her in the bathroom. “Ryan?”

“Just a minute,” she called weakly, but then he could hear her throwing up.

He rushed in, holding her hair back. “What’s wrong?”

“Morning sickness,” she explained, wiping a wrist across her mouth.

“But it’s evening?”

She glared at him. “I’m aware of that.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. It usually only lasts a few hours.”

He handed her a wet towel. “I made dinner, but I can make you soup if you’d prefer.”

“Please,” she breathed. She looked more exhausted than ever.

“All right. Can you come down or do you want me to bring it up?”

“I can come down,” she said immediately, starting to pull herself unsteadily to her feet.

He put a hand on her arm to steady her. “Okay, let me rephrase. I’m happy to bring you soup in bed. I’d like to take care of you. Is that something you would like?”

Her eyes went distant, conflicted. He could see a lifetime of independence warring with the desire to be taken care of.

“Soup in bed sounds nice,” she said finally, quietly.

He dropped a soft kiss on her forehead without thinking about it. “Then that’s what we’ll do.”

RYAN

In the next few weeks, Ryan had to admit that Marco was taking good care of her. His job seemed a lot less demanding than hers, because he was almost always home before her, cooking or picking up food for them to eat together.

He even stopped by the hospital when she was working late, just to make sure that she ate.

They had gotten to know each other more. He was thirty-five, and she was thirty. He was impressed when she told him about how she’d graduated high school at sixteen and gone straight to medical school, finishing her residency at twenty-eight.

He talked a lot about his family. He seemed really close with his mom, Connie, especially after her battle with cancer. He also had a younger sister, Maria, and a niece and nephew, Fiona and Louis.

She didn’t reveal anything about her own family. She was relieved when he didn’t ask. Maybe as a billionaire he had the resources to background-check her and find out for himself; that was better than her having to talk about it.

“What time is your appointment tomorrow?” he asked one night after dinner.

“Eleven,” she told him. “But it’s fine if you can’t make it.”

“I wouldn’t miss it, kitten. Maybe we can do some shopping afterward?”

She raised an eyebrow at him. “Shopping?”

“Yeah”—he shrugged and started cleaning up the dishes—“we’re going to need to get stuff for the baby.”

She immediately felt wary, as she always did with any reference to the future. “I’m only three months, and we still haven’t figured out if this is going to work between us.”

Marco sighed. “I’m trying.”

“I’m not saying that you’re not; I’m just being realistic.”

She had to admit, she did want this to work between them. She liked Marco more than she’d ever expected. And she really, really wanted him to fuck her again.

It seemed unfair that she couldn’t properly remember their one night together. If she did, she’d at least have a nice fantasy to play in her head as she wore out her vibrator’s battery every night. Pregnancy horniness was the worst.

“I have a shift after the appointment, anyway. Maybe we save the shopping for a bit,” she suggested as a compromise.

“Okay. And are you able to go this weekend?” he asked. It was his family’s annual Memorial Day celebration at the lake. He’d invited her last week, but she’d felt a little wary about getting in too deep too quickly.

“Yes,” she admitted. She was curious to meet the family Marco had talked so much about. And…who knew? Maybe they would even have to share a room. Share a bed. Share body heat.

She shivered at the thought.

MARCO

Anna walked into the room. “Are we ready?”

Ryan nodded and lifted her shirt up higher.

Marco was in awe of the little blob that appeared on the screen. “That’s our baby?”

“It is. And this”—Anna pushed a button—“is his heartbeat. Nice and strong.” She printed out some pictures for them and started looking over Ryan’s chart. “You haven’t really gained much weight. How’s the morning sickness?”

“Not bad,” Ryan said, “just a few hours in the evening.” Marco wasn’t sure if she was trying to downplay it; he’d seen how miserable she’d been for those hours every evening, hunched over the toilet.

“All right,” said Anna cheerfully. “See you in a month, then.”

Marco stared at the picture of the ultrasound before putting it in his wallet. Ryan raised her eyebrow at him. “I want to be able to look at it,” he explained.

He opened the car door for her outside. “How about some lunch before we get back to work?” He had heard what Anna said about her weight; if Ryan needed to eat more, he was happy to step up his mother-henning.

RYAN

Anna walked into Ryan’s office a few hours into her shift. “How’s it going?”

“Just finishing up some notes,” Ryan said, distracted.

“That’s not what I meant,” said Anna, hands on her hips.

“I know.” Ryan sighed and looked up. She’d figured Anna would confront her sooner or later about keeping Marco at arm’s length.

“He seems like a great guy, Ry. The way he held onto that ultrasound picture? Precious! I know you’re scared, but you need to realize he’s not Christopher and let him in.”

“I’m trying.” Ryan held a hand over her mouth, but a small sob escaped anyway.

Anna rounded the desk and hugged her friend. “Oh, honey,” she murmured.

“I’m having the dream again,” she admitted, knowing that Anna knew what dream she meant. “It’s stupid. I really loved Chris for a while there. I just don’t understand what made him do that to me.”

“Think maybe you should talk to someone again?” Anna suggested.

Ryan shook her head. “It’s just stress; I’ll be all right.”

“Want me to take you home?”

“No, I need to finish this up and do rounds again.”

“Okay,” said Anna dubiously. “But listen. I got you, girl. It’s okay to ask for help—from me, from a therapist, or even from Marco.”

“I know,” said Ryan, and watched as Anna headed out for her own rounds.

Ryan turned back to try and finish her paperwork, but the conversation had stirred up too much emotion. She couldn’t focus.

She wished she could forget that night.

She had met Chris in medical school. At first he was really fun, taking her out to clubs and parties and then laughing through the hangovers.

But as time went on, his behavior became more controlling. He barely allowed her to attend classes by herself, either following her and sitting next to her, or refusing to let her leave his dorm.

Then, her whole family died unexpectedly in a car crash. She was devastated. And all the red flags she had been ignoring from Chris started waving even higher.

“We can mourn here at the dorm, you and me, baby,” he said, his voice syrupy-sweet. “We don’t need to go to the funeral, deal with all those people. I’ve got all you need right here.”

She had to practically beg him to let her fly home and go to the funeral. The whole time, he stuck to her side like glue, glaring at anyone who dared to get too close to her. When he finally left to go to the bathroom, her childhood friend Zac approached her.

“I’m so sorry for your loss, Ryan,” said Zac, pulling her in for a hug. “If you need anything, I’m here, okay?”

“Thanks,” she said, dredging up a smile, but it was short-lived as Chris came back and yanked her away.

The silence during the car ride to her childhood home was icy. As soon as they got safely inside, Chris exploded. “You’ve been screwing him behind my back, haven’t you?!”

“I haven’t seen him in years, Chris,” she protested.

The first punch to her face caught her off guard, and she screamed with the second one.

He stood over her. “You’re nothing without me!” He wrapped one hand around her throat.

She heard his pants hit the floor, but nothing after that. Zac, who lived next door, heard her screaming and broke into the house.

She spent a week in the hospital with a fractured cheekbone, a broken nose, three broken ribs, and a broken arm.

Anna was there when she woke up, and Zac still kept in touch even to this day, checking in on her from time to time.

That had been five years ago, and Ryan hadn’t had a serious relationship since. It didn’t feel safe. It didn’t feel worth it.