10: Chapter 10

RYAN

“What do you think about this one?” Ryan pointed out a three-in-one crib that could be converted into a toddler bed with a full-size headboard.

Marco looked it over. “What happens if we have more? We wouldn’t be able to use the same crib for all of our kids.”

“More?” Ryan still wasn’t sure they were going to stay together after this one. Things had been going really well between them lately, but she was always waiting for the other shoe to drop.

“Yes”—Marco nodded—“I’d like to have at least one more. It’s not like we don’t have the room for them, or the money.”

“Let’s just see how it goes with this one,” she hedged.

He shot her a knowing look. He’d been doing that a lot lately, ever since that week she’d panicked and iced him out. “I’m not worried about it,” he said, grabbing her hand and kissing her cheek.

Knowing that he was happy with their relationship did help to put Ryan at ease.

“When are we due?” a saleslady asked, walking up to them.

Marco smiled and rubbed Ryan’s stomach. “November.”

“And do we know what we’re having?”

“Tomorrow,” Ryan told her. “Today, we’re just here for the furniture.” By mutual agreement, she and Marco were acting like they didn’t know the sex until they found out from an ultrasound instead of a paternity test.

The lady nodded. “Any ideas on what you’re looking for?”

“A crib, obviously. Dresser, a changing table, and maybe a rocker.” Marco had done his reading and knew what to look for.

Ryan added, “Maybe a bassinet.”

Marco nodded and kissed her cheek. “Whatever you want, kitten.”

They picked out everything they wanted and arranged for it to be delivered the next week. Ryan had to admit that it was a nice day together: shopping, having lunch. It was like they were a normal couple. She felt truly happy for the first time in years.

They had another appointment after lunch; Anna confirmed that it was a boy, and also gave them more ultrasound pictures. Marco put another one in his wallet.

“He’s a little small, but healthy. I’d like to see you gain more weight next time,” Anna said, looking at Ryan.

“I eat.” Ryan felt like she was being scolded for doing something wrong.

“I know you do, but you’re also running around burning more calories than the average person. Talk to Dr. Wyatt and see if you can cut back on your hours. You’re at twenty weeks now; you should be showing more.”

Ryan only had a small, barely noticeable bump.

“I will.”

Anna looked at her. “I’m here if either of you have any questions. I mean, your best friend is also your obstetrician. Take advantage of that. Bother me in the middle of the night.”

Afterward, Ryan and Marco walked through the hospital toward her office.

“You know that you don’t have to work so much, kitten,” said Marco, eyebrows knit with worry. “It’s not like we need the money.”

She stopped walking to frown at him. “I’m one of only three cardiothoracic surgeons here, Marco. We’re the leading trauma hospital in the state, and I worked really hard to get here.”

“I’m not saying that you didn’t,” Marco said, raising his hands in surrender. “I just don’t want your health or his health to suffer. You can’t keep working these hours after he’s born or you’ll never get to see him.”

Ryan froze, immediately jumping to the worst possible interpretation of those words. “Is that your way of telling me you’re going to take him?” she demanded.

“That’s not what I said—” Marco started.

“But that’s what you meant.” She put a hand out to stop him when he tried to step closer. “I have surgery in less than an hour,” she said, and ducked into her office, closing the door in his face.

She had rearranged her surgeries so she could be free to leave with Marco after the appointment, but now she was angry with him. ~She’d never get to see the baby?~ What gave him the right to say such a thing?

Back when she’d been trying to decide whether to tell Marco about the pregnancy, this had been her worst fear. That Marco would take the baby away. That she’d get a family again, a son, only to lose him because some man decided he knew better than she did.

Some part of her knew Marco wouldn’t do that. But her brain and her heart were speaking different languages right now.

She sat at her desk and cried.

Hours passed without her realizing it, and she was shocked to see it was nearly 9 p.m. when her phone buzzed with a text.

Marco

When are you coming home?

Ryan

I’m not.

She turned off her phone. She needed a break, time to think. She was still paying rent on her house, and she kept spare clothes in her office. Grabbing a clean pair of scrubs for tomorrow, she drove to the house for the first time in weeks.

MARCO

Ryan

I’m not.

Marco stared at Ryan’s text blankly for a long minute, leaning against the kitchen counter. He’d made Ryan a special dinner as an apology for their fight earlier, then given up and put it all in the fridge an hour ago.

He waited for another message, an explanation, but it never came. He called her, but he got no answer. Then he texted again.

Marco

What happened? Please call me.

Nothing.

He called again, this time leaving a message. “I’m worried, kitten. Did something come up?”

An hour passed, and he still hadn’t heard anything. His calls went straight to voicemail, his texts unanswered. He began to fear the worst. What if Ryan had been in an accident? What if Chris came for her?

He called the hospital, and they verified that she’d left around nine.

There were two ways that she could’ve driven home. He hopped in his car and drove both of them, looking for any signs that something went wrong along the way.

Nothing.

Following a sudden suspicion, he drove to the other side of town, to the house that she once rented. A tremendous weight lifted when he saw her car in the driveway.

Marco sat in his car and tried to call her again, but like all the times before, it went straight to voicemail. Then, filled with sudden anger, he walked straight to the door and started knocking.

He didn’t care how late it was. Ryan had scared the shit out of him, and now he deserved answers.