Astronaut

VERONICA

~“Now I lie awake and scream in zero gravity,”~

~And it’s starting to weigh down on me,”~

~Let’s abort this mission now,”~

~Can I please come down?”~

~– Simple Plan~

***

~Beep. Beep. Beep.~

“What do you mean you haven’t been taking the pill?”

~Beep. Beep. Beep.~

“It was making me sick, and my doctor said my body was making its own antibodies. It’s rare, but it happens.”

~Beep. Beep. Beep.~

“So you’re telling me you stopped taking them and didn’t use any other protection?”

“That’s right.”

~Beep. Beep. Beep.~

“Why are you so hell-bent on ending your life, Veronica?”

~Beep… Beep…~

~“Because my father’s death is my fault.”~

***

^72 HOURS EARLIER^

As I walked onto the floor, all eyes were on me. It was Friday, and my leave was over. I had to return to work.

Like a spectacle in a zoo, everyone watched and whispered. I had to keep my head high and endure. When I got to my office, I saw Jo already in the office next to mine.

Everything Erin had told me about Jo’s real intentions, about her crush on Jax, filled my mind as I forced a smile and said, “Hey.”

Jo, who had always been so kind and funny, who had been a good friend, who had been there for me in the hospital.

She was the sweetest girl, but the cold look in her light hazel eyes told me Erin had been right.

My friend had been pretending.

She confirmed my suspicions with the coldest voice, “Don’t talk to me.”

She turned back to her work, ignoring me.

Erin appeared, surprisingly without Lucy, and started chatting with Jo, shooting me a smug grin that said it all.

Everyone else seemed to be talking, and most were glancing at me.

They were remembering the welcome party.

They were remembering me being rushed to the hospital after cutting myself. It felt like everything I did was just digging a deeper hole, and I was jumping in willingly.

And a certain someone wasn’t helping by storming out of his office and heading straight for mine, with all the women swooning over him, including Jo and Erin.

Suddenly, every woman was glaring at me, and the reason for their reaction was standing in front of me, unashamed.

I was starting to think Jax didn’t understand the concept of ~distance~.

“Good morning, Miss Tanner,” he said, back to his old games.

“I know you’re eager to get back to work, but translations will have to wait. You’re needed in the meeting room ASAP.”

At least he was talking business.

“No problem, Mr. Cole,” I said, standing up. “Will you be there too?”

He nodded and walked with me to the exit. I could feel the women’s glares on my back, but I ignored them. What else could I do?

Jax didn’t say a word on the way to the meeting room, and I didn’t even look at him. It was easier to pretend he wasn’t there.

But I was still aware of him, and it made me angry. I was so done with him.

We got to the meeting room, and I took a seat between Jax and Oliver, who gave me an encouraging smile. I was sitting right across from Vadim.

He was grinning at me, as if saying, “See that girl? I tapped that.”

I would’ve been angry if I didn’t pity him. Poor guy thought I was a prize. I was anything but.

Mr. Winter asked how I was doing. I told him I was okay. Mr. Kostyanovski seemed concerned too—though I doubted it was genuine—and I assured him I was fine.

After the formalities, I started translating the meeting.

The meeting lasted about three hours without a break. By the end, everyone was exhausted. Then Mr. Winter surprised me by saying, “So tonight, at the Farewell Ball, make sure everyone arrives on time.”

Mr. Kostyanovski nodded seriously, as if it was a grave matter. “Don’t worry, Seamus, we’ll be there on time.”

“There’s a ball tonight?” I whispered to Oliver.

“Yes,” he replied, looking guilty.

I narrowed my eyes. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

He glanced behind me, and I turned to see him exchanging looks with Jax. They both looked at me, and Jax said, “You’re not invited, Veronica.”

“Why?” I asked, remembering the last ball I attended.

A cold feeling settled in my stomach. They…they want to avoid a repeat of last time.

Oliver looked upset.

“I’m sorry, I tried to change their minds, but they were adamant. They don’t trust you to—” He stopped himself, and I felt a chill.

“They don’t trust me not to lose it again,” I finished for him. They were right. No one could trust me to keep it together.

I certainly didn’t trust myself, so why would Mr. Winter and Mr. Kostyanovski?

Why would Jax and Oliver?

Why would anyone?

Frey trusts you, a small voice in my head reminded me, and I straightened up.

That was right. Frey trusted me, Frey knew I could handle it, and that was all I needed.

“I don’t care,” I said calmly, then gave Oliver a small smile.

“Don’t feel bad. Even if I was invited, I probably would’ve said no.”

Oliver didn’t seem convinced by my reassurances, but Jax was another story.

“I’m glad you get it,” he said, his gaze softening. I braced myself for the usual tug of attraction, the one that always seemed to pull me towards him.

But it didn’t come. I was puzzled. Why?

“Of course, I do,” I replied, brushing off my confusion. “So, is there an afterparty or something I can attend?”

I asked hopefully, because it had been a while since I’d been out clubbing and I was starting to miss the taste of alcohol.

“Actually, yes,” Oliver said, his smile returning now that my mood had lifted.

“We’ve rented out a whole pub for us. It’s going to be a theme party.”

“You mean a themed afterparty?” I raised an eyebrow, laughing. “What’s the theme?”

“Pirates of the Caribbean,” Jax replied, smirking. “I’m going as Will Turner, so you should be Elizabeth Swann.”

I should’ve felt a flutter in my stomach at the thought of Jax flirting with me, but I felt nothing. Something was off.

Before I could respond to Jax, Oliver chimed in, “You don’t have to dress as a character from the movie, just a pirate costume would do.”

I looked at Oliver and saw in his silvery-green eyes that he was giving me an escape from Jax’s suggestion.

Grateful, I smiled at him. “No problem. Where’s it going to be?”

“Ever been to the Drunken Irish’s Beer Place?” Jax asked, his eyes locked on mine.

I blinked in surprise. “I’ve been there a few times. What time should I show up?”

“Around midnight,” Oliver said, “I think the Farewell Ball will wrap up earlier than usual.”

“I see,” I said, making a mental note to ask Frey if he was working there tonight.

“Well, then I guess I’ll see you there.”

“Great,” Oliver said, checking his watch. “I’ve got to run. See you later.”

Now it was just Jax and me in the meeting room, and the air seemed to crackle with tension.

As he leaned in close, his lips brushing my ear, a ~zing!~ shot through me.

Apparently, my attraction to him was still somewhat there, but where the rest of it had gone, I had no idea.

“I’m not giving up on us yet. I want to see you tonight, and I want you to save at least one dance for me. I’m not done with you.”

He flashed me a grin and stepped back.

“You can head home for the day. I’ll see you later,” and with that, he was gone, leaving me alone in the room.

“I’m not done with you.”

“I’m not giving up on us yet.”

Was he crazy? I’d told him over and over that I didn’t want anything to do with him, but he just ignored me. What an idiot.

As I headed to the parking lot, I dialed Frey’s number.

He picked up after a few rings. “What’s up?”

His voice sounded deeper than usual.

“I’m…shocked,” I admitted. “I’m just leaving work now.”

“Good,” he said, “how did it go? Why are you shocked?”

Still feeling a bit dazed, I told him about the afterparty, where it was, and what Jax had said.

When I finished, he was silent for a moment. I thought I’d surprised him.

But when he spoke, he was as calm as ever.

“The manager at the Beer Place told me we were booked tonight by some big company, but I had no idea it was Wynntec & Co or that you worked there.”

“Actually, I never told you the name of the company,” I said, frowning as I stepped out of the elevator.

“You sound like you’ve heard of it.” It wasn’t ~that~ big of a company.

“It’s been gaining popularity in the high-tech industry, and I keep up with that stuff,” he said.

I remembered that his late father was The Shark, the man who owned half of Las Vegas and a big chunk of the high-tech industry.

It made sense that Frey would keep tabs on that kind of thing.

“I see,” I said, and asked what I’d been meaning to ask him.

“Are you working tonight?”

“Yes, but only until two,” he replied.

I thought about what he’d said, and something occurred to me that hadn’t before.

“Why do you work at the pub? I mean, you said your father left everything to you. So why?”

He was quiet for a moment before he said, “Because I believe in earning my own money. I put everything my father left me aside for emergencies. I don’t touch it.”

“Besides, I don’t need it,” his voice hardened slightly, “I own a dojo that does pretty well and I make good money bartending. I love what I do. Why get greedy over something as worthless as money?”

My heart pounded in my chest at his words.

“I’m glad you feel that way. I’m sorry for asking so many personal questions in just two days. I mean, it’s like I’m trying to take your mentor title away, which I’m not, but—”

Frey cut me off with a laugh.

“Veronica, relax,” he said, sounding amused, “it’s okay to be curious about people. We’re human, after all. It’s only natural for you to pry.”

His comment about me prying made me go pale.

“I’m sorry,” I said, a strange unease settling over me. “I didn’t mean to pry. It’s not like me, I’m usually pretty detached—”

“Veronica,” Frey interrupted, “it’s fine. Chill out. You’re not in trouble. I was just messing with you.”

I felt my cheeks heat up, which always caught me off guard because I was ~definitely~ not the type to blush.

“Alright then,” I muttered.

Frey chuckled and said, “Guess I’ll see you tonight.”

My heart pounded in my chest and I struggled to catch my breath.

“See you then,” I managed, hoping my voice didn’t betray my nerves.

The call ended and I was left feeling strange. I wanted to keep talking to him, but at the same time, I didn’t.

Anxiety crept in, filling my head with confusing thoughts. Why was I suddenly acting like a shy schoolgirl around Frey, who I usually had no problem talking to?

And why was I less attracted to Jax?

A scary thought crossed my mind, but I quickly dismissed it. That wasn’t how things worked, or at least, that’s what I thought…

“Veronica?”

I jumped, pulled from my thoughts, and turned to see Lucy a few steps away. I hadn’t seen her earlier today, not even with her usual group, Erin and Jo.

And the weirdest part was, she was talking to me.

“Hey, Lucy,” I said cautiously, half-expecting her to start yelling at me.

But her green eyes were soft, and she must have heard the wariness in my voice because she said, “Don’t worry, Nix. I’m not with them anymore.”

I was floored.

“What do you mean?” I asked, needing her to explain.

“Josephine and Erin,” Lucy said, “I’m not with them anymore. They’re bullies, and I don’t like bullies.”

It sounded like she was choosing sides.

“I see,” I said, looking down. What else could I say?

“They were talking shit about you, saying you stole Jax, that only Jo deserved him.”

“I thought so too, at first, that Jo needed Jax more. But when Erin told me what she did to you at the welcome party, I couldn’t stand it. So, I’m not their friend anymore.”

Surprised, I tilted my head. “So you’re…my friend?”

Lucy smiled. “If you want me to be.”

I was a bit wary. She could have good intentions, but what if she was a spy for Erin and Jo? What if she wasn’t being genuine? I couldn’t be sure.

But I decided to take her up on her offer. I had nothing to lose.

“Okay,” I said, giving her a small smile. Then I winced as a sharp pain shot through my stomach.

Seeing my expression, Lucy looked worried. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” I lied, the pain intensifying.

“Just some PMS pains.” Another lie.

“Oh, okay,” she said, then smiled and before I could stop her, she was hugging me.

“I’m glad we’re friends, Veronica,” she said sincerely.

The pain slowly faded, and I managed a small smile, hugging her back. I hoped she was genuine and that I could trust her.

But I had a feeling that any happiness I felt now could vanish in an instant.