Careless Whisper

VERONICA

~“We could have been so good together,”~

~We could have lived this dance forever,”~

~But no one’s gonna dance with me,”~

~Please stay…”~

~– George Michael~

***

Once Mom and Stephen hit the dance floor, Andy and her boyfriend, Ben, were quick to join them.

That left Oliver and me alone at the table, waiting for Jax and Regina to return from their little adventure outside. They were probably making out right now.

The thought of Jax kissing anyone stirred up a weird feeling in my stomach.

Oliver was acting like I wasn’t even there. He was engrossed in his shiny new black smartphone, just like he always was, avoiding any eye contact with me.

Honestly, I was hurt by his judgmental attitude. I mean, it’s not like he wasn’t having sex all the time! He was being such a hypocrite!

I felt my blood heat up, and I decided to call him out on it. I didn’t bother with small talk. “You’re a hypocrite.”

That caught him off guard. He looked at me, his expression turning dark. “Excuse me?”

I shrugged, not scared of him. “You heard me.”

“What makes you think I’m a hypocrite?”

“You judged me for something you do all the time,” I said, holding his gaze.

“What makes you think I sleep around like you do?” he asked, his voice steady but with a hint of anger.

“You’ve had so many girlfriends, none of them lasted more than two weeks. As far as I know, you’ve never been in a long-term relationship. So, how is your way any different from mine?”

His hands clenched into fists. “You think you know everything, don’t you?”

“I could say the same about you,” I shot back.

Before we could continue, my mother appeared out of nowhere.

“Veronica, Oliver,” she said, smiling, completely unaware of the tension between her daughter and stepson, “why don’t you come and dance with us? You can’t just sit here all night!”

Mom was smiling so brightly at both of us, it was a wonder flowers didn’t start growing out of her head.

I looked at Oliver, my eyes telling him that this argument wasn’t over, and he seemed to get the message.

So, we put on fake smiles, or at least I did. Oliver looked like he couldn’t decide whether to frown or smile.

We followed Mom to the dance floor, where she left us to go back to her husband, leaving Oliver and me alone. ~Again~.

And of course, as if this night wasn’t dramatic enough, the song changed to a slow one.

Since it looked weird for Oliver and me to be standing stiffly, we both silently agreed to dance, and he put his arms around my waist while I put mine around his neck.

Thanks to my heels, I was a little taller than him.

As we danced, he decided to dive back into our argument.

“I’m not a hypocrite, Veronica,” he said, glaring at me. “We’re nothing alike, you and me. You sleep with men like they’re nothing, like they’re trash. At least I respect the women I’m with.”

“I don’t use men,” I snapped.

“You’re a tease,” he said flatly. “I mean, look at you!”

“You dress like that, you bat your eyelashes in a way that drives men crazy, and then, after you’ve used them for your own pleasure, you throw them away without a second thought.”

“How would you know?” I asked, his words cutting a little too deep.

“Because I know your type,” he answered without hesitation, “and I’ve been with women who are just like you; teasers, seductresses, players, take your pick.”

“Even if I was like that, and I’m not,” I said, barely keeping my anger in check, “why do you care? It’s not like I’m teasing you or anything!”

Then he dropped the bomb.

“No, but you tease Jax.” When my eyes widened, he smiled without humor. “Oh, you thought I didn’t notice? That I was blind? I know you slept with him about four months ago.”

“He told me right after it happened because he’s my best friend and he can’t keep secrets from me. Or at least he couldn’t. I know something else happened after that one time, but he won’t tell me.”

“That alone tells me how much you messed him up, how you affected him so much that he doesn’t trust his best friend anymore.”

His words left me stunned. The fact that Jax told him about our first time together wasn’t as shocking as everything else Oliver had just said.

~I~ messed up ~him~? Was he crazy? How could I possibly shake up the unshakeable Jax Cole? What was he thinking?

After a few moments of shock, I found my voice again. “Is that what this is about? You’re being a jerk to me because I supposedly ~teased~ Jax and made him stop sharing things with you?”

His cheeks turned red with what I knew was anger.

“You think I’m that shallow?” he said through gritted teeth. “This isn’t about me! It’s about Jax!”

My shock turned into anger.

“I don’t tease anyone!” I almost shouted, stopping myself because we were already drawing attention from the other couples.

“I never made any promises to Jax after that one-night stand, not that it’s any of your business anyway.”

“And if he really wanted me back then, he would’ve tried to find me after it happened. But he didn’t because he knew it was just a fling!”

“So, you started working for him, huh?” Oliver shot back. “What’s your excuse for that?”

“What do you even know?” I retorted, feeling a sudden urge to throttle him. “Last I checked, you didn’t give a damn about anything related to me. Why the sudden interest in my sex life?”

“Because you dragged Jax into it!” His voice was a whisper, but the anger was clear.

“And despite our past, you’re still my family and I don’t approve of your lifestyle. I never thought the sweet twelve-year-old girl I first met would turn into...this.”

His words hit me hard, and I had to swallow the sudden lump in my throat. “Once again, you’re sticking your nose where it doesn’t belong.”

His arms tightened around me. “I just want to know why you turned into such a bitch.”

His silvery-green eyes bore into my dark ones, unyielding, disapproving. His words stung more than I’d ever admit, more than he’d ever know.

He was asking questions I sometimes asked myself. But the truth was, no matter how much he wanted to know, I didn’t have any answers. And even if I did, I don’t think I would’ve shared them with him.

What had Oliver ever done to earn my trust? Getting me a job was a kind gesture, but it didn’t really count.

Besides, that was the only thing he’d ever done for me in the eight years we’d known each other. Why would I start confiding in him now, especially when he was being such a judgmental ass?

“I don’t know what’s gotten into you tonight,” I said, certain he must be dealing with something else, because he’d never spoken to me like this before, “but whatever it is, don’t take it out on me.”

“I’ve done nothing to deserve your accusations. I never made any promises to anyone, Jax included. I just want to live my life and do whatever the hell I want. So, stay out of my way.”

It seemed like my words finally got through to him.

I don’t know which part of what I’d just said caused his sudden pained expression, but I never got the chance to ask because Jax and Regina suddenly appeared next to us.

Jax looked at his friend with a small grin. “Care to switch?”

Oliver dropped his hands instantly. Apparently, he was eager for an excuse to get away from me.

“Not at all,” he said and turned to Regina, who was smiling at him warmly. “Shall we?”

As Oliver led Regina deeper into the dance floor, Jax moved in front of me and wrapped his strong arms around my waist.

His touch, unlike Oliver’s, sent tingles up my spine.

I hadn’t mentioned how amazing he looked tonight, but then again, when did he not look good?

His dark chocolate hair was as messy as ever, which was incredibly sexy, especially with his chiseled, handsome face. His midnight-blue eyes were as intense as ever, even more so in the dim light.

He wore black tailored pants with a dark blue shirt under his black coat, and black shoes that looked new and expensive.

He towered over me, and I could feel every taut muscle in his perfectly sculpted body as we swayed together.

Neither of us spoke for a few long minutes, while the band played another slow song.

This one I recognized. It was the slow song my dad told me he and my mother danced to on their wedding night; ~Careless Whisper~ by the legendary George Michael.

It’d been so long since I last heard it.

I must’ve made some sort of face because Jax’s eyes searched mine intensely.

“Is something wrong?”

What ~wasn’t~ wrong?

Oliver’s words were still echoing in my mind, and the truth was, I was kind of scared to ask Jax about it, about his true feelings regarding me and our nonexistent relationship.

So of course, I was out of it right now.

Jax frowned, looking alarmingly concerned. “Veronica?”

Blushing, I lowered my eyes to the ground. “Nothing’s wrong. Really.”

“It doesn’t look like nothing,” he pressed, ever the observant.

Tired from this disastrous evening, all I wanted was to relax instead of being bombarded with questions and accusations and arguments I had no answers for.

“Jax, please,” I said, raising my eyes back to his beautiful pair, “can’t we just dance quietly? It’s been a stressful night. I just want some peace.”

Some emotion I didn’t understand passed in his eyes and he pulled me closer, so he was practically engulfing me.

“Peace I can give,” he said quietly and lowered his head to mine.

The place where our foreheads met ignited, and I let out a small gasp while Jax’s eyes gazed into mine meaningfully.

I couldn’t seem to tear my eyes away from his. The swirls of green, gray, and light blue were mesmerizing.

Without noticing, I’d leaned into him, lost in his eyes, until our noses brushed against each other.

His arms tightened around me, my arms were wrapped around his neck. I stood on my tiptoes, because even with heels, he was still taller than me.

Swaying with him to the sad music of George Michael, unable to look away from those eyes of his, it was probably the most intimate situation I’d ever been in with anyone my entire life.

It was intense, it made electricity spark between us, and it frightened me as much as it excited me. I didn’t want to look away. I didn’t want us to stop touching. I didn’t want to be so afraid of intimacy.

His lips suddenly pursed into a thin line.

“Why are you doing this to me?” he asked, voice low and raspy and edgy.

Surprised, I instinctively tried to step back, the spell he put on me broken, but he didn’t let me lean away more than an inch or two.

“W-What do you mean?”

“You’re all over the place with your signals,” he complained, “one moment you’re all over me, the next you’re as cold as ice.”

“You act like you can’t stand me, then you’re practically undressing me with your eyes. You need to figure out what you want.”

I was left speechless, yet again.

“You promised me peace,” I murmured softly.

“Not when I’m still trying to make sense of things,” he replied, his eyes darkening. “Why did you let that redhead kiss you?”

Funny thing is, he seemed to be dwelling on my kiss with Drake more than I was. Honestly, I could’ve easily forgotten it ever happened if he hadn’t brought it up.

Jax shouldn’t have been thinking about it. He had just been outside with Regina, getting all touchy-feely!

Now that my mind was clear again…

“What’s going on with you and Regina?” I asked, a frown forming before I could stop it.

He gave a small grin, his face lightening a bit. “You’re dying to know, aren’t you?”

“Just like you’re dying to hear about Drake,” I retorted, my frown deepening.

Now he was frowning too.

“So, his name is Drake,” he said, his tone dark. “Like the singer?”

“Exactly,” I replied. “So, you and Regina? I gotta say, I didn’t see that one coming.”

“Seems like you saw other things coming,” he said, smirking at my wide eyes, clearly seeing that I caught his not-so-subtle innuendo.

“Why do you have to make everything sound dirty?” I asked, poking him in the chest.

His eyes dropped to my finger. “Careful, darling, I might start thinking you’re flirting with me.”

I could feel my cheeks getting hot. “I am not!”

His hands began tracing patterns on my lower back, sending shivers through me.

“Why do you want to know if Regina and I are together?” he asked, his voice low and husky.

“Why do you want to know why I let Drake kiss me?”

He stopped our swaying. “Let him?”

I narrowed my eyes. “Answer me first, and I’ll answer you.”

Without missing a beat, he said, “Your mom heard I was single and decided to play matchmaker with Regina and me tonight. Your turn.”

Not giving myself time to think about his answer, I said, “I didn’t expect him to kiss me and didn’t have time to react. I didn’t want him to kiss me; he just did.”

We stared at each other for a moment, each trying to read the other. He broke the silence first. “Why did you sleep with him?”

I squirmed uncomfortably. “Jax…”

But he wasn’t having it.

“Answer the question.” He pulled me back against him so tightly that not even a piece of paper could fit between us.

Normally, bossiness would make me stubborn and defiant. But this time, I found myself answering him.

“That’s what I do,” I said quietly. “I sleep with men, then I never see them again. Drake wasn’t supposed to come back into my life, but sometimes things happen whether you want them to or not.”

His jaw tightened, and I was surprised to see anger in his eyes. I thought he wanted to hear me say I felt nothing more than annoyance at Drake. Apparently not.

“Was me becoming your boss also a coincidence?” The way he said ~coincidence~ made me wince.

But I had to be honest. Oliver had been infuriating, but he was also right; I hadn’t been clear with Jax and in a twisted way, I had to admit that I did tease him, even if it made me feel sick.

So, I answered honestly. “Yes.”

The look on his face when he realized what my answer implied… My heart felt like it was dropping in my chest.

“I see,” he said, his expression closing off and his eyes becoming unreadable. “So, you never intended to see me again after we fucked.”

I’m not usually bothered by the F word. Hell, I use it myself all the time. But the way he said it made me feel like he was cheapening what had happened between us, when it wasn’t supposed to be cheap at all.

“Jax,” I started, but stopped. What could I say to that? That’s exactly what I’d wanted; to never see him again.

His eyes studied me so intensely that it took all my willpower not to squirm. “Why are you doing this to yourself?”

“I’m not doing anything,” I said, feeling sick. “I’m having fun. I’m free. I can sleep with as many men as I want.”

“You were a virgin when we were together that first time,” he said suddenly.

I clenched my fists. “You don’t know that.”

“But I do,” he said seriously, “I saw the blood on the sheets.”

“So what?” I snapped. “Is it wrong for someone to lose their virginity in a casual fling?”

“It’s not wrong,” he said quietly, “it just explains a lot about you.”

I felt my anger rise. “What exactly do you think it explains?”

He looked grim as he said, “That’s for me to know.”

I studied him for a few silent moments before deciding to ask him a question that had been bothering me for a while.

“Why are you so focused on me?”

He frowned. “What?”

“Why did you suggest we become lovers? Why did you want to sleep with me again after the first time?”

“Why, when everyone at work told me you don’t get involved with coworkers, did you get involved with me? What makes me so special that you give me all your attention?”

His gaze locked onto mine as I rattled off my questions. He drew me in closer, and we stood still while the world danced around us, oblivious to our little bubble.

Mom was somewhere in the crowd with Stephen, Andy was with her boyfriend, and Oliver was with Regina.

Here we were, pretending to be a couple, bickering and debating about our non-existent relationship.

And then he said, “If I spilled all my secrets, there wouldn’t be any mystery left for you to unravel.”

“Just spill it!” I snapped, my nerves frayed.

He laughed at my impatience, the first genuine humor he’d shown during our tense exchange. “No can do. You’ll have to figure it out on your own.”

“That’s not fair!” I protested, pouting.

Now he was really laughing. “Throwing a tantrum won’t get you anywhere, Veronica.”

Realizing I was indeed acting like a spoiled child, not just now but throughout our entire conversation, I found myself smiling for the first time in days.

“One can hope,” I muttered, conceding defeat.

He smirked, the smug jerk. “I think this is the first time I’ve ever won an argument against you.”

I raised an eyebrow. “Don’t push your luck, pal.”

His lips twitched with amusement. “You dare call your boss ~pal~?”

“I only follow the rules you set, Mr. Cole,” I retorted.

He chuckled. “I walked right into that one, didn’t I?”

“Oh, you sure did,” I said, grinning triumphantly.

He laughed again, and I decided I loved his laughter. It was deep and husky and almost sensual, the kind of sound that could make a weaker woman swoon.

“Don’t look so pleased,” he teased, “it’s still clear who’s the boss here.”

“You mean a symbolic boss, right?” I asked, tilting my head and grinning wickedly when he groaned, dare I say, playfully.

“Touché,” he said, grinning back at me. “But don’t get too cocky. I still won the real deal.”

I rolled my eyes. “Whatever.”

“Hey, I’m allowed to gloat,” he smirked, “it’s not every day I get to conquer a beautiful woman.”

Before I could stop myself, I was laughing hysterically. It had been so long since I’d laughed like that. Too long, actually.

It was refreshing, even if a bit embarrassing, since my laughter sounded like a bird being strangled.

“Boy, you’re full of yourself,” I told him, still giggling. “Conquer? What am I, a fortress?”

His eyes sparkled in a way that was completely distracting. “It means you’re beautiful and stubborn and infuriating, but mostly just beautiful.”

My heart pounded so hard I thought it might burst. For a moment, I was speechless, then a deep blush spread across my face.

No one had ever called me beautiful so directly before. It turned me into a trembling mess.

When I finally found my voice, it was small and timid. “You think I’m beautiful?”

He leaned in close, his lips almost brushing mine. “Sometimes, I think you’re too beautiful to be real.”

We stood still, electricity crackling between us. Sparks flew in the air, sparks that we both knew would explode into fireworks if our lips moved just a fraction closer and met.

Our chemistry was undeniable; we both knew that touching would send us spiraling into desire.

But we had too many barriers and obstacles between us.

One of us needed to step back.

I was afraid that if we stayed locked in this moment, we would end up in the restaurant’s restroom with my dress hiked up to my waist.

His zipper would be undone and he’d be thrusting into me hard and fast against the stall’s wall.

I couldn’t let that happen.

Seeing as he wasn’t moving, I decided to take the necessary step, or the night’s drama would never end.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, extricating myself from his hold and stepping back.

Reluctantly, he let me go.

As we stood facing each other, his expression began to close off.

It was my cue to leave.

With a shaky, apologetic smile, I turned my back to him and headed for the exit.

I couldn’t stay at Bernard’s a moment longer.

Jax didn’t follow me.