Weâre in a tangle. No cameras. Nothing. Nothing but me and her. Sheâs sweaty and smells like sex, and thatâs just the way I want her to smell.
I want her to smell like me.
Hell, this hereâher hair with that pink streak spread out on the pillow and her limbs around meâthis is so fucking perfect, I donât want to even go take a piss.
I want so much more, Iâm a greedy fucking man. Greedy as fuck when it comes to her. I growl softly and nip at her shoulder, murmuring, âI need to go talk to Leo.â
She sighs, stretches. âAbout what?â
I look at her; sheâs a pistol and a half, and I love having my hands full with her. âIâll tell you later, woman. Cover up so I at least get my mind out of your luscious curves.â
âIâm hot and sweaty. I donât want to cover up.â
She groans, and I bury my own groan in her neck. âAnd I donât want to leave this bed.â Now I nip at the soft, tender tendon of her throat. âBut the sooner I talk to him, the sooner I can come back here.â
âMackenna,â she laughs, her arms tight around my neck, âare you seriously going now?â
I smack her ass playfully. âYeah. Iâve got big plans for your future.â
âCome on! Stay here. Tonight I wanted . . .â She looks at me with those pitch-black eyes, then frowns as if she doesnât like what she was about to say. Theyâre heavy-lidded, her eyes. âI want us to be friends,â she says at last.
âFriends?â I repeat.
âYeah. I want . . .â She sits up warily, tugs her hair. âI want to try to move on, Mackenna.â
âYou want to move on from me?â
Fuck me, but thatâs just not what I wanted to hear. Still, I sound casual. Sheâd never guess the size of the blade I feel sticking out of my gut right now.
âNo. From the past,â she says.
âReally,â I say, without inflection.
But I canât let go. I canât let go of the past. How can you let go when all you want is to turn back time and make a different choice? And yet she looks so fucking hopeful, as if this right here is the moment where she can finally live a happier life.
I donât want to tell her that thatâs not what I want.
âYour hair is fucking crazy.â I tug on the cotton candy streak.
She flashes a brief but rare smile. âTell me about your crazy wigs.â
âMy wigs are cool, babe. You better watch what you say about them.â
âDo you like wearing your wigs, or is it something they make you do?â
âThe wigs?â
âNo! Idiot! Leoâyour contract.â
âNah, I do it myself. Makes it easier. Like stepping into a persona. I dig it.â
âBecause youâre fun. You always did like to have fun. Oooh. And like the technique of pretending no one out there is me. Your jinx.â
âYouâre not a jinx.â
âAll that pot smoke your bandmates blow out is messing with your head. You donât make any sense. Explain.â
âYouâre not a jinx. It helps when youâre the only one Iâd want to make proud of me.â
An intense but secret expression flickers in her eyes.
My lips curl, an empty smile.
âThatâs news to you?â I laugh. âYouâre the only one Iâve never been good enough for.â Iâm putting it all out there. âKnowing itâs not you out there relieves some of the performance pressure.â
âI . . .â She blinks, her face losing some of its color.
âCat got your tongue?â I lean in and tongue her mouth.
She tongues me back, and I sigh and pull her closer. She sighs back, relaxing into the present. No more past. Fuckups. Mistakes. All those years. All that pain. All that impotence. The frustration. Gone.
She closes her eyes when my fingertips reach her scalp, and her tits rise and fall against my chest, awakening my cock to come play again. But I canât yet. Thereâs something I must do first.
I kiss the top of her head. âGo to sleep.â
âWhy? For your information, meathead, I wasnât planning on kicking you out tonight.â
âGotta talk to Leo.â
â¥Â  â¥Â  â¥
NO SURPRISE TO find out Lionel has company when I knock on his door. He ushers me into the living room while Tit wraps herself with a bathrobe and pouts from the bed.
Lionel shuts the door between the bedroom and sitting area, blocking her from us. âWhat happened at that rodeo bar was unacceptable, Leo,â I warn.
âJust trying to get a couple good scenes, something organic and natural. Damn, you love jumping into fights.â
âYeahâbut not when sheâs in it,â I growl, pacing around like a caged tiger, watched, taunted, pricked. âI need to get her out of here, Leo,â I finally tell him, spinning around to face him.
âYou donât need to do anything except work her out of your system, Jones.â
âI want to drive separately.â
His eyes nearly bug out. âExcuse me?â
âYou heard me. Pandora and I are heading to New Orleans and Dallas on our own. I want her away from the cameras, the fans, the girls. Everything.â
âYou canât just up and leave. We have a movie to film, and the producer wants her on the stage of Madison Square Garden. She needs to practice. Plus, your job is to give us some meaty shit for filmâthat is, if you still want what you asked for?â
âYou let me drive separately with her, Iâll help her with her dance routine. Hell, Iâll practice the kiss until itâs perfect. Iâll even give you a new song. God knows, itâs in my head all the time. Look, she doesnât like flying, and the cameras are driving me nuts.â
âYou want it all, dude, you want me to give you what you wantââ
âLook,â I interrupt, narrowing my eyes as I aim my index finger his way, âyouâre gonna get the kiss and Iâll also give you a song. One last song before you release me from my contract. Thatâs more than fair.â
Leo looks constipated, but I donât fucking care. With his eyes narrowed on me as he seems to let everything sink in, I let him watch me call a rental service and get a car for Pandora and me.
As soon as the call ends, Lionel is on me with a furious glare, tightening the sash of the bathrobe that just so happens to match the one Tit was wearing. âYou fucking her? Heard on camera there was fucking. We want to see some fucking action, Kenna.â
âYouâre not going to see shit.â
âIâll give you what you want,â he relents, âbut only if you make this movie worth remembering.â
âLeo, we had a deal,â I remind him. âYou said youâd release me if I went along with this bullshit. You wanted the kiss, and all youâre getting is that kiss.â Kissing Pink in front of thousands of fans, her lips on mineâhell, I know sheâll be angry. But she gets her chance to let the world know my song is bullshit. Not that I care all that much. Every complaint in that song is because Iâve been in love with her for years.
âFine. Go drive her around in a car, I donât care. But I get that kiss and that song or you get nothing, you hear?â
I head for the door. âI hear.â
âMake her want it, Kenna!â he calls.
âOh, she wants it.â I slam the door shut after me.
Just not as much as I fucking do.
My father has a second chance, and I realize now that so do I. Difference is, Iâm not screwing mine.
When I slip back into her room, sheâs lying in bed and quickly rises up onto her arms when I arrive. You could never fall asleep when you knew I was coming, could you, baby?
âHey,â I say, struggling with the sensation of carrying a grenade inside my chest. Grenade about to go boom!
Holy shit, I feel powerful things for her.
I feel everything for her. Anger and protectiveness. Possessiveness and pain. I feel fucking good with her. I feel . . .
âCome back to bed,â she whispers, lifting the sheets.
God, Iâm not fucking it up this time.
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