A Murder Of Crows {25}

Aria and I sat together for a while, barely speaking. Aria was her usual self. Unpredictable, always a mystery.

She let a ladybug crawl onto the tip of her finger and set it gently down on a cluster of leaves. She let a spider crawl onto her finger and squished it against the ground without a second thought.

Words weren't needed between us. No matter how long it had been since we'd last spoken, no matter how much I'd hurt her by cutting her out of my life, no matter how much things had changed, we were still just Aria and Cor.

As it got a little later, I knew I had something to do before asking Jamison to dinner. So I stood up, offering my hand to Aria.

She raised an eyebrow but took my hand. "You don't usually offer meaningless help. I'm perfectly capable of standing up on my own."

"You still took my hand," I said. "I guess we've both grown."

She didn't let go of my hand, instead lifting my arm up and looking at the bracelet. "Now you have to stay friends with me. No one else can make one like that."

"Yea. No one else," I said.

It was a promise, in our own way. Aria released my hand, which meant she trusted that even if she let me go, I'd come back this time.

But it was Aria, and I'd always come back to her.

We left the path and parted ways without a word. She'd given me my space all this time, despite the questions I was sure she must've had. It was no coincidence we hadn't happened to run into each other since I'd stopped speaking to her.

I went back to my dorm room, hands in my pockets. I could feel the light tickle of the bracelet against my wrist. It wasn't unbreakable. It was better.

I let myself into my room and texted Val. I sat down in front of our unfinished puzzle and waited.

It was a few minutes before Val let herself into my room. She shut the door and sat across from me, picking up a piece.

"So what is this about? I know you wouldn't just invite me here if you didn't want something." The smug look on her face said she already knew what this was about, though.

"You tipped Jamison off to Kieran's involvement," I said. I'd been thinking it over and over in my mind. "Why? What was your goal in all of this?"

She eyed a piece and set it in the proper spot. "Did you know I met Jamison when I was a little kid? He doesn't remember, but I do. These older boys were picking on me while I was walking home from school one day. They pulled my hair and stole my doll. They were tossing it between each other, and I couldn't catch it. Jamison stopped them. Kieran and Cole were with him, but they didn't even notice it was happening. Jamison did, though. Kieran is narrow-minded. He fights for his goals, but that's all he can see. Jamison sees the bigger picture. He saw the little girl getting bully, and he stopped it."

"What does that have to do with anything?" I said. She was being cryptic again, but I was done playing her games. I wanted answers.

"My grandpa always had this saying. 'The world spins' he always said. 'The world spins' is what he said when my parents told him they were moving to America, and what he said when I was born, and what he said when his dog ran away, and what he said when my dad started a new job, and what he said when my cousin died from a drug overdose." She picked through the puzzle pieces carefully. "Life goes on, good or bad. My cousin, he had some prescription pills he took legally and some he bought illegally for other issues his doctor didn't think were as serious. And the combination of those pills killed him when he was 19 years old."

"And what, you thought getting into the business would avenge him?" I said.

She looked up at me with a chilling smile, every bit a threat. "I know the Doctor's name. I know most of his Collectors and Dealers and Recruiters. I found out Kieran was working for him, and I used that as an opportunity to slip in and learn that information. And I thought, why not make this a little game? Kieran needed money, Jamison wanted to stop the Doctor, and they were friends turned enemies. The perfect pieces."

"You've played both sides all along," I said in disgust. "Why drag me into it?"

"Because Kieran stopped telling me information. Sometimes he wouldn't even tell me his targets. So I pulled you in. He told you more than he told me, because he knew you weren't a threat to him. Then I just traced your movements and got the information in the end anyways. But this was a game I didn't want to play for too long, so I let Jamison join the fun. I also sent an anonymous suggestion to have kids come forward under a confidentiality rules." She looked at the pieces in her hand, turning her head to the side as she eyed them. "Everyone wins in the end, right? Kieran and Mia got their money, Jamison got his chance to play hero, and the Doctor's empire crumbles when I say it does."

I shook my head, because none of this made sense. "You're sick. And that's coming from me."

"I like to study people, and how they react to things. I know you do too. It was interesting to see how far Kieran could be pushed. He was so mad at Jamison. He even totally fell for me convincing him to test Jamison's influence in the Crows. Slashed his tires and spread these scandalous rumors. We both got to see how powerful Jamison's position was," she said. "I needed to know before we took this game too far."

I didn't understand. I didn't get her goal, her reasons, any of it. Sure, she wanted to stop the Doctor, maybe as revenge in honor of her dead cousin. But everything in between was just selfish cruelty. It almost sounded mentally unhinged to me.

I picked up the final piece of the puzzle, setting it in place. The picture before me made sense. Val's words didn't. Either way, it was done.

"We're finished," I said. Aria was back in my life. Kieran was turning himself in. Val would topple the Doctor. Jamison and I would have a tentative future. So many little pieces that didn't make sense, forming together a picture I could finally comprehend. "Go."

"It was fun while it lasted," Val said, jumping to her feet with a smile. "I have my reasons. That doesn't mean you need to know. All you'll ever get from me are more pieces."

"I want nothing more from you," I said.

"Have a good future, Cor. And remember it'd be very different if I hadn't been your friend," she said, winking and shutting my door.

I didn't bother locking it. She wouldn't come back.

***

The next night, I ate dinner with Aria. The two of us sat together, and Aria read me a poem she was reading for class. She rolled her eyes at the language and crossed words out to change the poem. I mostly listened to her, having missed her voice. It was always a steady volume, but so powerful.

We parted ways when we were done eating. Jamison had missed two classes today, and I had a feeling things were getting busy for him now. I ate lunch alone, and stared at our usual table, empty. No sign of Kieran, Mia, or Val.

As I made my way back to my dorm, I looked up at the sky. It was getting dark out, the breeze tickling my legs. Aria had taunted me for wearing shorts when it was so breezy out, even as she sat in her skirt and blazer.

When I reached my room, I was surprised to see Jamison leaning against the wall next to my door. He looked over at me, bags under his eyes.

"I figured I'd wait for you to come back. I didn't want to bother you if you were busy," he said.

I unlocked the door and the two of us went inside together. I shut the door and Jamison rubbed at his eyes. His hair was messy, meaning he'd been tugging at it again.

"You're going to go bald," I said, nodding towards his hair.

"That's the least of my concerns. He confessed to me and the headmaster," Jamison said. "He didn't drop anyone's name. He claims he worked alone. I didn't push him for any answers."

"What happens now?" I asked.

"I got another anonymous message. It had a name. Presumably the Doctor's. I gave it to the police to look in to. You were right; this is their job, not mine. I'll do what I can to help, but I'm not trained to take down a drug ring," he said. "We're buffing security around campus while the police work. We're making stricter rules about students traveling off campus until the police say it's safe again. We don't want anyone else getting hurt, especially if the Doctor tries to lash out at students for possibly leaking information to us."

So Val had given the Doctor away. I bet he didn't even know she'd been working for him.

"Cole is...he knew, we all knew. But now it's real. Now Kieran's admitted to his involvement. Cole doesn't know what to feel, I think. He's pissed and sad and frustrated. He blames himself, he blames us, he blames Kieran, he blames the world. But we have a confidentiality policy on the matter, and nothing will happen to Kieran. He claims he was threatened into it, which I know is a lie. He did it for his mom." Jamison started to lift his hand towards his hair but hesitated, glancing at me and dropping it back to his side. "I emailed him a list of places hiring around town. He'll probably delete it without opening it. But I'm tired of only hurting people and never looking back."

"And you?" I said. Sure, Cole was feeling a lot of things. But Jamison was emotional. Just what was he feeling?

"I'm tired," he said after a moment of silence. "I'm tired of so much, Cor. It wasn't supposed to go like this. None of it was. I don't think enough about what my actions do to others. I think of how they'll help them, and not how they'll hurt them. I don't want to do that anymore. Kieran needed help back then, and none of us gave it to him."

"All we can do is learn," I said. Great, just two times with Aria and I was already starting to talk like her.

But Jamison gave a weak smile. "You're right. I can't change what I've done. All I can do is learn and grow. And I will. I can't fix things with Kieran, but I can make sure I never put anyone else through the same thing. I hope Kieran learns, too."

"He'll have to take a legit path now. The Academy will be watching him, and his usual money method is about to be arrested. He only did it for the money." And probably to hit people. He seemed to have a lot of anger to get out.

"I...called his dad. I told him I was worried about Kieran, and asked him if he could try to spend more time at home. I know his dad is just trying to earn money so they're stable if anything happens to his mom. But it's hurting Kieran," Jamison said. "My parents saw his mom not that long ago. They said it's really bad. He's been living with that for years. He's had to grow up watching his mom forget about him and die."

It explained his actions, but an explanation wasn't an excuse. Kieran had done bad things. Jamison had done bad things. I'd done bad things. We had to go forward carrying the weight of those actions.

"I got dinner with Aria." I'm not sure why I said it. I just wanted him to know.

Jamison smiled a little. "Good. I'm glad for you, Cor."

"Yea. Thanks, Jamie," I said.

"Little steps still cover a distance," he said, pulling me close and kissing me.

And I wanted to go that distance. I wanted to walk miles with him.

"I've got paperwork to do," he said. "Breakfast tomorrow?"

"I'll meet you at the stairs," I said.

"I'll see you there." He kissed my cheek and left the room.

I sat at my desk and took my homework out. Things were changing, but school was still going on, and I couldn't let my grades slip.

It was about an hour later when someone knocked on my door. I turned, waiting for them to come in.

Kieran stepped into my room a moment later, followed by Mia. They shut the door, and for once, Kieran looked like the fight had gone out of him. He looked as tired as Jamison.

"I told them. I didn't drop your names, though I'm assuming you already told Jamison," he said.

"It was Val," I said. If he'd come here to apologize, I didn't want it. It wasn't him who needed to say it.

"No shit," Mia said, though with none of the usual hostility in her voice. "We never trusted her."

"She'll topple the Doctor's empire," Kieran said. "We were all just a game to her."

"So what now?" I said.

Kieran shrugged. "The two of us get jobs. You go back to living your life without us."

The world spins.

"He has a long way to go," Kieran said, opening my bedroom door. "We were both selfish. I'm done with them, though. You can make choices for yourself, Cor. We were just coming to tell you that it's over now."

"Check your email, Kieran," I said.

His grip on the door handle tightened. "I've got job applications to go fill out. Goodbye, Cor."

"Goodbye," I said.

Mia gave me one last look before following Kieran out of my room. The door shut, leaving me alone in my room.

So that was it. They were moving on. Val was making her escape from our lives. Aria was back. Jamison was becoming more permanent. The Doctor's reign was coming to an end.

I had a future to think about. A future with Aria and Jamison in it. A future where I found things that made me happy, not that just made sense.

I had a long, long way to go. But I was taking those little steps. And someday, with Aria and Jamison at my side, I'd get there.

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A.N.- One more chapter after this to wrap it all up, everyone!