Chapter 4

𝕾𝖔𝖓𝖌 𝖙𝖔 𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖓 𝖙𝖔: 𝕰𝖛𝖊𝖗𝖒𝖔𝖗𝖊 𝖇𝖞 𝕿𝖆𝖞𝖑𝖔𝖗 𝕾𝖜𝖎𝖋𝖙

***

I wanted this impossible nightmare to stop when the first snow fell.

My senses were filled with a certain scepticism, curiosity, and incredulity, akin to flashing light rays, until I heard those warm, nostalgic voices that dispelled my misgivings.

"Elfein, what do you have in store for our little baby's name?" A voice I had long yearned to hear, a tone that should have been a faded flicker yet nonetheless feels alive.

Someone laughed, and I couldn't help but notice the familiar sweetness of it.

"Then if you so insist, my dear, I will want our little baby's name Vestia Monsiore, isn't that beautiful?"

"Vestia Monsiore, it is a beautiful name and I felt like you meant----"

"Diana, Vestia intended for her to be the trailblazer of her own destiny. A trailblazer blazing her own route..."

The scenario where lights obscured my vision and those words sounded genuine gave me the impression that the gentle touch of my skin was nothing more than a glimmer of hope.

When my vision cleared up enough, I noticed two joyful faces. One was seated on a wooden chair that rocked, she had blankets wrapped around her shoulders. She kept grinning at me.

Her shape brought to mind my mother, who shared her golden blonde hair, emerald eyes, and peach cheeks. I turned around and saw that I had already been hoisted.

The man's green-lime hair, silver eyes, and contented expression were visible to me. My eyes widened at the reflection in his eyes.

I could feel the place and how youthful these two individuals were in comparison to the first time I saw my parents by the way he raised me and smiled at me with those beautiful eyes.

This cannot take place.

The young man attempted to raise me higher and added, "Vestia, I hope one day you will be happy with your choices." When he did, he spun us around with uncontrollably funny laughter.

With a chuckle, the woman in the rocking chair, swaying, spoke briefly with the man.

"Elfein, are you certain that you're going to speak to our infant in that way when she is unable to speak at all? So, please hold onto those words until she's grown up." The woman responded.

I missed her voice, and I miss this man's voice, too. Neither of them leaves me; they have been by my side since the day I was born. These two beings have been with me throughout my existence, and they gave me life, yet I have failed to protect them.

Did God grant my requests? If so, though, why would he allow my death?

I thought I had traveled back in time to the moment my mother gave birth to me, but how could that be possible given what had transpired and what was happening right now?

I've learned that no one can go back in time, from literature to my professor to tutors in the royal family. It was irreversible what had transpired.

Why is it that I feel as though I've touched a loop when there's nothing in return? As if a mystical doorway forced me to alter the remnants of my own existence.

No, this had to be the reverie of my soul seeking to return to a history that shouldn't be altered.

Even though I believed I had made up my mind, my mother's warmth was still palpable when she embraced me. She laughed and took hold of my hands, which were holding her cheeks as if they had a mind of their own before I could even begin to think.

"Please, our lovely child, grow up with a big heart and lots of friends." She muttered, "I can't wait to see what you'll become," and as she spoke, I felt warmth course through my entire body.

It seems like I would never want to wake up from this dream. It was too real, though, to be one. Too true.

Time flew swiftly, and before I knew it, I would be turning six today. I was mistaken in my thinking back then when I forced myself to believe that everything was only a phantasm of my memories from the past.

Perhaps because my tastes have changed, the past I've encountered has changed. My curiosity about my parents and our home led me to become more guarded towards them.

Now, even though I didn't like the way I had to coerce my parents into saying those words, I now understood the oath and what it meant to both our family and the imperial family.

They said what I wanted to hear even though I didn't tell them about the past events that I was aware of, even though I felt like the bad guy for simply threatening to leave.

I might be able to travel back thanks to this occurrence, but even if that's not the case and nobody planned it, I wouldn't throw away the opportunity to help the people I've neglected.

It's still possible to make major changes. This is just the start.

The party had an incredible conclusion. The kids of my mother's acquaintance gave me a lot of colleagues. I gained a great deal of knowledge about the world that I had never visited. The feelings that erupted all around me that evening made everything seem fantastic.

These emotions changed with time, but they didn't emerge from my shattered memories of my previous damaged spirit. I was mesmerized by his sight, his appearance, his handling of situations, and his behavior toward other people because of his brilliant light.

I think I was so drawn to his never-ending moonshine that I ignored everything around me in order to follow him.

However, things would be different this time. I would go back in time and make everyday matter in order to support someone in need.

For I am aware of what it's like to receive criticism from the one who caused my blindness.

After a long time, I decided to look at the moon and clear my head by heading towards the garden. I shuddered as the chilly breeze hit my skin, but it passed quickly when someone gave me their coat.

My eyes grew wide when I realized the garment was too big for me. I turned to look at the young child next to me, who seemed unaffected by the fact that he had just given me his coat.

"You can return it to me anytime, you know my household, right?" I started to speak as soon as he said those words, but my words kept retreating.

He sighed, but he never bothered to look in my direction because I'd been shy for so long.

"Henry Vellitas, you should remember at least my name when the Duchess introduced us earlier."

How could that name ever escape my memory? Without a doubt, Henry Vellitas is a true friend of my parents. The one who would frequently pay my father visits in order to discuss the negotiations between the empire and its neighbor.

One particular quality set the Vellitas apart from the other aristocratic families. Their eyes are blue like the glistening ocean, and they have raven hair.

My father's side prevailed in the Betore battle, which was orchestrated by the Vellitas. Although the empire's reputation improved as a result of this victory, there were some competing interests inside the imperial household.

I had heard this rumor previously, but I chose to ignore it because I believed it to be baseless and merely a rumor. I discovered the truth later.

He managed to laugh, and I had been staring at his face, eyes, lips, and neck without even realizing it.

As soon as he remarked, "You look like I've captivated you, Lady Vestia," I quickly turned away from him and grasped his coat by the shoulder, sensing his enticing, seductive aroma.

A blend of lush, colorful forests and bright, sunny days. Had I said everything there was to know about him now? Right now, I don't sound like myself. I was able to quiet my racing heart by shaking my head.

This is not possible. This has nothing to do with anything other than the fact that I was taken aback.

He stopped laughing when I pretended to cough, but his eyes changed and he began to lean in closer.

"Don't worry, just as our mothers said earlier, I hope for us to be good friends."

In the past, when we first met, he would have disregarded me and I would have been fine with it, but now things are different.

When he noticed that I was cold, he came over, handed me his coat, and even struck up a conversation with me—something he had never done before.

I couldn't resist comparing everything up to this particular instant when I noticed my reflection in his eyes. There seemed to be a tinge of grief mixed with curiosity.

I paused and took a big breath before answering, "Before accepting you to be my friend."

"I guess we have to pinky swear first," I could finally break free from the things I hadn't done before, and this little boy would be ideal for it, so I grinned uncontrollably.

"Does Pinky swear? That, what is it?" His tone sounded inquisitive, but I couldn't help but be drawn to that soothing melody—a low, deep pool of tranquil water that gave me a heart palpitation.

His hands went to my cheeks, and I looked at him, my eyes wide, not realizing that my face was already heating up.

"What are you---"

"Please stay put so I may examine and feel you." He rested his hands on each of my cheeks and placed his forehead on mine, saying, "You seemed to have a fever."

I was unsure of how to respond. I should have shoved him away, but I can't make my body do that.

I took a few deep breaths when he eventually stepped away, but all I saw was his genuine smile.

"All right, for a split second I believed you had a fever. Thus, tell me more about the pinky swear you previously mentioned," he said, softening his tone.

Since he is different from me, I didn't know why he would do it, but I suppose he would just be unaware of them. If we were adults, a young man and a young lady under an arc of roses would mean something profound.

I acted on his request after calming the pounding drum within me. I closed his hand like a fist the same size as mine while holding his right hand and entwining my pinky finger with his.

"With this, we would be friends if we promised something to each other"

"So this means like a promise thing?"

"Yes"

"Okay, bring that what you may"

"You sure?"

"Of course, I wouldn't back away now since I already gave you my coat"

"You said I could return it"

"Well, you could but come to my estate if you would"

I sighed. Even though it would be impossible to make friends with this young boy, it is conceivable.

"Then, promise me that you'll always have my back in exchange for that, I promise you that I'll be the person you want to be friends with..." His eyes opened the instant I said those words, but I could see the dull eyes begin to glow.

"You're unique, Lady Vestia"

"We're friends now, so call me Vestia..."

"Then you can call me Henry."

"Now that we're friends, I have to show you something..."

***

Author-nim note: edited ^-^ Please forgive my grammar as English is not my first language. ^-^