Chapter 34

Caleb guided Akane up the stairs, where he showed her the loft. Aside from the rows of books, most of them being medical journals, the thing that really caught Akane's attention was the antique Steinway resting in the corner. Almost immediately, he picked up on his girlfriend's interest and offered to play for her.

It was one of her greatest fantasies come to life, sitting on the nearby couch, listening to her boyfriend play her favorite piece. Now it really was a song for her. Her own personal heaven on Earth. She already knew his voice was beautiful, but getting to hear it up close like this made the experience so much more intimate.

Something was bound to give eventually, and listening to Caleb sing so passionately to her in his smooth as silk voice proved to be the tipping point for the extremely love-addled young woman. Akane pulled him off the piano bench by his shirt and practically glued her lips to his. She then pulled him over to the couch and pushed Caleb down onto it, nearly banging his head in the process.

She straddled his lap, and the two lost themselves in a fit of blind passion, their desires finally reaching critical mass. Neither one of them had any experience with the emotions they were feeling at that moment; they just knew they needed each other to be as close as humanly possible. Akane was especially feverish for her lover, barely letting the poor boy come up for air as she kissed him again and again.

When they finally managed to pull away from each other, they were breathing heavily with a mixture of exertion and arousal. Their faces were flushed, and Akane's eyes were swimming with her own lust. Finally, she said it.

"Caleb...I...I want to see your bedroom next."

Now his heart was racing out of control. She was looking at him like a woman possessed. Whether Akane was aware of it or not, the front of her yukata had come loose, showing him more of what lay underneath. He swallowed back the lump in his throat.

"Are you...are you sure?"

She nodded, a feverish look in her eyes. "I am. I'm ready."

"Then I just need to grab something from downstairs."

Akane let him up, and Caleb headed down the spiral staircase towards the parlor. There, he opened the drawer where the condoms were stashed and picked one up. It was then something became glaringly apparent to the young man.

He didn't have a clue what he was doing.

What was the difference between a large and an XL? Furthermore, why did some of these say non-latex and others didn't? Where were the instructions on this damn thing?

Panic began to set in. Caleb was not ready for this; he could feel it deep down in the depths of his being. Just the idea of taking that leap, screwing something up, and potentially hurting her made him nauseous. But what the hell else could he do? She said she wanted this, and if he rejected her now, she might take it personally.

And knowing Akane, that was bound to turn violent.

His mind raced at that moment as the pressure weighed down on his shoulders. What was the answer here? This is what Akane wanted, but it wasn't what he wanted. If he explained his fears to her, his anxieties, would she be understanding? Or would she try to throttle him?

Finally, he placed the condom back in the drawer and shut it, sighing heavily.

I can't do this. Not right now.

With that thought in mind, he made his way back upstairs. Maybe she would understand if he was just completely honest with her. It was because he cares for her so much that he could not take this risk. Not with something like the Incubus Curse looming over them.

"Akane...listen. There's something I need to...."

Upon returning to the loft, Caleb's words trailed off. Akane looked terrified. Whereas a second ago she seemed more than ready, his girlfriend was now trembling from head to toe, as if on the verge of tears.

"Hey..." He quickly sat down next to her. "...hey, are you alright?"

"I...I don't think so..." she admitted, her voice shaky. "I thought I was ready for this but...but then...."

"Wait, you're saying you don't want to...."

"Please don't be mad at me," she pleaded, tears already streaming down her face as she talked at a mile a minute. "I know I said I was ready a moment ago, but now I'm not sure, and I'm so scared you're gonna reject me if I say no, and I can't handle that and...."

"Hey, it's okay," he insisted, smiling at her. "Babe, it's alright."

"Promise me you're not mad," she insisted, her voice hitching. "Or disappointed. I can't handle that; I just can't."

He shook his head vehemently. "I'm not mad or disappointed."

"Are you sure? I wanted tonight to be perfect. I really did. But now I just feel like I've ruined everything, and I can't...."

Caleb hugged her tightly to him as Akane quietly broke down. This was the first time he'd ever heard his girlfriend cry like this before. Akane had shed an emotional tear once or twice, but not like this. God, he had no idea she was feeling this fragile right now.

"It's okay," he assured again, holding her tightly to him. "I promise you, I'm not mad or disappointed or anything like that."

"I'm sorry!" she wept, trembling violently in his arms. "I wanted to give you my first time, and I still do. I promise I didn't want to be this scared. I don't even know why I feel this way."

"You don't have to," Caleb responded gently, relief washing over his being as he held her tight. "You're not ready. I get it."

"But it's not because I'm not sure if I love you or not," Akane insisted, still slightly panicky. "I promise it's not that. I really do love you, Caleb. I love you more than anything, and I don't understand why...."

He shut her up with a kiss. Akane finally seemed to relax, the tension in her being melting away under her boyfriend's lips.

"I know you love me," he assured. "Akane, you built a cannon out of fireworks and shot down a helicopter for me. With nary so much as a thought of the innocent bystanders below."

She finally smiled, still sniffling a little. "I...I did."

"You butchered your way through over a dozen Hunters to keep me safe. You slaughtered them like cattle for me."

Akane giggled and nodded. "I'd do it again too. I'd kill anyone for you, Caleb."

"I know you would," he responded before kissing her on the forehead.

She finally relaxed, settling into him once more. After a moment of quietly cuddling, however, she spoke again.

"Darling...can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"Why do you love me?"

He gave her a curious look.

"I promise I'm not fishing for compliments. I'm really just curious. I try to be confident like you. But...sometimes, I just have trouble seeing it."

Caleb smiled at her lovingly. "It's simple, honestly. I love you for all the same reasons you seem to love me."

She quirked her head at him.

"Don't get me wrong, your intelligence and your beauty will always be things I'm attracted to. And your devotion and loyalty to me will always be something I cherish. But when I think about the reason why I genuinely hold you in my heart, the same answer keeps appearing. I love you because...you're the only person aside from maybe my parents I've ever considered to be worthy of my love. To me, that's all the reason I really need."

He intertwined the fingers of his right hand with her left hand.

"Before I met you, I never thought I could ever consider another human being to be my equal. The human race was cattle to me. Food, barely worthy of the oxygen they breathed." He kissed Akane before relaxing his forehead against hers. "I've never been so happy to be proven wrong in my life."

"Caleb..." Her heart melted at his words.

"It hurts me to think you can't see how amazing you really are. And sure, in the grand scheme of things, you're definitely not perfect, but...."

He gently rested his hand against her cheek and closed his eyes.

"You're perfect for me. In my mind, at least, that will always make you perfect to me. And if I have to remind you every day of my life for the rest of my life of all the reasons why you are so worthy of my love, then so be it."

Akane kissed him furiously again, falling backwards onto the couch as the two lovers gave in to their passion once more.

"I feel the exact same way," she insisted as they kissed. "Caleb, I don't understand why I can't bring myself to make love to you when I so desperately want to give you everything. But I promise I'll remind you every single day of all the reasons I love you too until the day I'm ready finally comes."

"Let's start now," he responded before kissing along her neckline. "I won't be content waiting a moment longer. I want to hear all the ways you love me. And you deserve to hear all the ways I love you."

"Then tell me, darling." She quietly moaned as his teeth grazed her chin. "Tell me all the ways you love me."

"You are so stunningly intelligent, Akane," he insisted. "The way you shot down that helicopter...sweet crimson, I wish I could bring Dabir back from the dead just so I could rub your genius in his face all over again."

"My genius is nothing compared to your bravery in the face of adversity, my love," she immediately responded, her hands running everywhere. "That you would stand so boldly against this tide of human ignorance makes my legs weak."

"That you would slaughter for me, protect me in those moments I cannot protect myself, fills me with such joy and such confidence I feel invincible."

"One day, I will give you everything. All of my firsts already belong to you. That hasn't changed. From the moment I first laid eyes on you, I knew in my heart that I was yours."

"All of my firsts belong to you as well, my love. All that I have to offer this world, I would offer solely to you. You make me stronger than I ever thought possible. For the first time in my life, I have a reason to believe in fate. Because I refuse to accept a world where we were never meant to be."

"I was nothing before I met you. You complete me, make me whole."

"You have become my single greatest muse. Your beauty will be my inspiration for the world I seek to create."

"You are my drug."

"You are my obsession."

"I love you without equal."

"I love you above all else."

"Nothing else in this world matters."

"Nothing else in this world will ever matter again."

Back and forth, they went like this. Both of them keeping their promise to each other. They would remind each other every day for the rest of their lives of this burning, obsessive passion they now felt for one another. This was the first and only time in either of their lives they'd felt something so fervently, a love so bright that it threatened to burn everything around them.

Let it all burn. They decided. The world wasn't worth giving up how they felt for one another.