Chapter 13

Caleb cooked dinner for himself and his mother that night, perfectly cutting liver with scallions over a bed of rice. Honestly, he couldn't have been more pleased with the end result if he had tried. And what was more, he even had enough leftovers for his school lunch tomorrow.

As the two sat and ate at opposite ends of their ornate dining table, his mother eventually spoke, finally bringing up the elephant in the room.

"You're slipping," she insisted before taking another bite of liver.

He sighed in aggravation before setting his chopsticks down. "What makes you believe that? Personally, I thought I'd managed to cut back significantly so far."

She nodded. "Perhaps at first. But you can't deny you've been especially restless lately. First, there was the incident at your last school."

"All I'm saying is, that kid shouldn't have whined so much about his position in the orchestra," Caleb growled. "I was doing the classical music club a favor with that one."

"Then there was our neighbor a few doors down at our last place of residence."

"Oh, come on! You can't seriously hold that one over my head. The man was a closet pedophile abusing an uncomfortably low legal age of consent."

"Then the incident on the elevator and now this little kerfuffle with Mr. Fujimi," she finished. "My point is, you're starting to fall back into old habits again. I won't always be able to protect you from the fallout, Caleb. You need to start showing a bit more restraint."

He folded his arms and grumbled. "You were perfectly fine letting me off the leash in the states."

She set her chopsticks down and pointed at him with a look of severity in her eyes. "That was different, and you know it. We were going after your father's killers."

"And now I'm going after his ideals," Caleb challenged. "You always told me I would be the inheritor of his will, did you not?"

"You're also the inheritor of his ego," she quipped. "But even your father knew when it was time to wrangle the beast in and show due caution. Those loose morals of yours and impatient attitude are going to get you killed one day."

He scoffed at that. "Oh, I have loose morals? This coming from the woman who uses mind domination to force hospice patients into making her the sole beneficiary of their life insurance policies."

Angelika sighed in aggravation, running her hands down her face. "Blessed crimson, you really are your father's son. Look, I'm not trying to pick a fight with you, Caleb. I'm just concerned. I thought by moving to a country that was a little more culturally stable, and you'd calm down enough to at least be more mindful of your actions. Remember, it's not just the FBI we're in hiding from. Our former kinsmen are still looking for you. Not to mention the legions of Hunters who might be lurking about."

Caleb remained silent, a bitter look in his eyes.

"Whether you like it or not, the more unnecessary attention you draw to yourself, the more danger you draw with it. You've yet to fully come into your own with your burgeoning powers. And I can't always be there to protect you."

After a moment, his eyes finally softened. "I'm trying, Mother. I promise I really am. But..." He sighed. "Dad's death still weighs heavily on my mind. Just thinking about it fills me with such rage I just..." He clenched his fists and took a deep breath to keep himself from getting worked up. "...my blood screams for vengeance. This fire in my veins is not something I can safely ignore."

"I'm not saying you have to ignore it, son. You just have to channel it into something more productive," she offered. "You need an outlet. Something to keep your mind occupied."

He shrugged. "I have plenty of outlets."

"No, those are hobbies," she corrected before holding up a piece of human liver with her chopsticks. "One of which, I'll remind you, you've managed to incorporate into your nighttime activities."

Again, he just grumbled in frustration. "Well, what would you have me do then?"

"You need something positive in your life. Not just a hobby or a simple distraction, but a genuine passion you can invest your time and energy in."

Caleb slumped back in his seat dramatically. "Sweet fucking crimson, please tell me we're not about to have this conversation again."

"I'm just saying, I think a girlfriend would do you some good," she insisted. "At the very least, it would give you something else to think about."

Now he was the one running his hands down his face.

"What about that nice girl at the grocery store you frequent?" Angelika offered. "Didn't you tell me her grandfather has tried to set you two up?"

He shrugged. "He's made a few not-so-subtle hints, but..." Caleb sighed. "...look, I'm just not interested, okay? Besides, Japan's laws on what's legal and what's not when it comes to that sort of thing are wishy-washy at best. Especially when it comes to foreigners."

"You must be the only teenage boy I know of who has absolutely no interest in girls," she insisted wearily. A thought suddenly occurred to her at that moment. "Sweetheart...is there something you want to tell me?"

Caleb sat up and severely stuck his pointer finger out in front of him, already knowing where her mind was going. "No. We're not going there."

"Because you know I would be just as happy if you showed up at the apartment with a handsome young man as I would be a pretty young woman," she assured. "There's absolutely nothing wrong with that."

He groaned in exasperation. "I know there isn't. But that's not it either. Look, I just..."

His words trailed off. Angelika could see the gloom forming in her son's eyes, prompting her to place her napkin on the table and get up out of her seat, taking a spot next to him before placing a hand on his arm.

"Talk to me, sweetie. I can see something's wrong. Tell me what's bothering you."

He didn't seem to want to open up at first. Until finally, Caleb reluctantly turned his gaze towards her and relaxed a little.

"I love our new home, Mom. I really do. And you're right, and the structured, orderly atmosphere has been good for me." He drooped somewhat. "But...it just doesn't feel like I belong here."

She frowned in concern. "What do you mean?"

"Everyone at school is just so damn ingratiating," he insisted. "I'm one of the most popular students at Fuyuki High right now. It seems like all the guys there want to be pals while the girls all want to hang on my arm. Since starting here, I've had to shoot down no less than seven love confessions."

Angelika gave him a weird look. "And that's...a bad thing?"

Caleb chuckled, seemingly perking up a bit. "Oh, don't get me wrong. I fully expected it. After all, I'm easily the most attractive one there. And I've yet to meet another student in my class who's been able to keep up with me grade-wise." He seemed to get mopey again. "But that's not the issue. The problem is, none of them seem to want to get to know anything about me beyond my looks or my grades. I've been relegated to a status symbol at my school. The admiration only seems to run skin deep. None of them care about knowing who I really am."

Again, she frowned at him worriedly.

"This country is beautiful, and its people are all cultured and friendly. But it's clear that I'll always just be a handsome, intelligent outsider to them. My peers may accept me, but I'll never truly be one of them. I feel...othered." He looked at her discontentedly. "Does that make sense?"

She nodded. "Of course it does, sweetie."

He sighed. "I don't know...ever since Dad and the others died, it's felt like..."

"Like what?"

Caleb hung his head dejectedly.

"Like I've lost the place I truly belong."

Angelika's heart ached at his words. As intelligent as he was, as arrogant as he was, she knew Caleb better than he seemed to want to believe she did.

She knew all too well that her son was lonely.

"I wish things could have been different," she assured. "And I know how much you miss the Kin and your Chapter and your family. The cult was your entire life, as it was mine. And that's been taken from us."

"Don't get me wrong, and they'll all pay for what they did," Caleb assured. "But... you're right. There are days I wish things could have stayed the way they were. At the very least, if I wasn't in hiding, I might not feel so...lost."

After listening to her son's woes, Angelika found her smile again and placed a hand on his cheek.

"I understand how you feel. But that which is lost can always be found again."

She kissed him on the cheek.

"I'll take care of the dishes. You go practice on the Steinway for a while. It will help you clear your head."