âBecause it was originally my nickname.â
ââ¦Yes.â
âRina, can I be the only one to call you that?â
âPerhaps youâre the only one who will ever call me that again.â
Since Citrina had no friends and her family will never call her by her nickname anymore.
âGood.â
Desian replied briefly. However, she was able to see that he was delighted. It was the first time she heard what Desian wanted and what he did not directly from him.
Citrina slightly raised her eyes. This situation seems to be a bit dangerous.
âDonât allow anyone.â Desian said quietly.
Making their own nicknames means that they are imprinted on each other. Interest and curiosity slowly turned into liking, and liking into obsession.
The first feeling of affection and experiencing something new.
He never intended to let go of all those feelings.
ââ¦Yes..?â
It was when Citrina sensed the subtleties of the atmosphere, someone politely knocked on the door.
âItâs Heled.â
âYes? What wrong?â
âBaroness Foluin visited. Should I send her back?â
Citrina was worried. Before she left for another empire, she had to resolve all situations before then. Desian had been enlightened to some extent, and it was time to settle her own relationship with her family.
Desian asked Citrina with a conflicted expression.
âDo you want me to do it, Rina?â
Upon hearing his suggestion, Citrina hesitated a little, but the decision came out easier than she thought.
â⦠No. Iâll do it, Del,â she decided. It was bound for her to fully tell her intentions to the Baroness.
âItâs something I have to settle. If I donât get out of there for a long timeâ¦â
Gentle eyes were looking at her. A gentle gaze that one cannot imagine belonging from a villain.
âIâll come, of course.â Hearing that, she felt that they had become closer.
So Citrina headed to the waiting room, and Desian decided to stay in the next room.
She felt it had been so long since she met the baroness.
Considering the duration, itâs been a month or so.
A lot has happened during that time, but the baroness has never changed.
âCitrina Foluin.â
The baroness seemed to be in a hurry. She pulled out her body without even touching the tea that Heled prepared.
âYes.â
âIâll be straightforward. Iâm running out of money. The baron needs the last money to investâ¦â
The baronessâs words were desperate and she knew why.
âThe money for gambling, right?â
The baroness shifted her gaze from Citrinaâs face.
âThat⦠Anyway, itâs not enough. I know youâve been paid by now, but this is the last time. Please help the family, my good daughter.â
Because of being good, Citrina lived in pain every day.
âYou say that every day and just take the money.â
In the future she had seen, the baroness would always take the money until Citrina died. Itâs as if she memorized what to say when talking about returning the money back.
âCitrina, you earned so much money and died so vainly.â
Citrina giggled. Seeing the smile on Citrinaâs face, the baroness talked in an impatient tone.
âIf this has anything to do with sending you to the two young masters of the Dukeâs house⦠I just need to borrow a little money⦠yes. In fact, you donât need to lend me anything for gambling, not that, but just enough for Elena to buy a real sword.â
How did such a person become her mother? A person who sent her daughter to this rumored duke family, but still only thinks of Elena. How?
In the eyes of the baroness, there was expectancy.
âWeâve raised, clothed and fed you. Your family has done everything for you to be educated⦠You are our good daughter, arenât you?â
Itâs funny how much her speech changes. According to Citrinaâs memory, she had been working ever since she was old enough. She personally earned what went into her mouth, and to her familyâs.
âNo. It has nothing to do with Del.â
âWhat?â
âItâs me. Thereâs something that suddenly came to mind, so Iâll just ask you one thing.â
âWhat the hell are you talking about, dear⦠Our good daughter, why the hell-â
âPlease answer me.â
âWhat is it, then? Tell me.â
Citrina closed her eyes. Her body trembled strangely.
âDo you know what my nickname is? Not my name Citrina.â
The baroness was silent upon hearing her question.
The affectionate voices of her parents that she heard for the first time. The sweetness of calling oneâs nickname. Even the little happiness that gave her hope.
âI remember everything changed from the moment Elena showed prominence/talent.â
The voice that called her unconsciously turned cold. The nickname that used to be Citrinaâs was lost. At some point, it was passed to Elena. Back then, Citrina didnât cry.
She just tried to forget the nickname âRinaâ. But all she got was demand for money.
â⦠Is that a problem now? There was no such thing, Citrina.â
âI⦠I was expecting for nothing.â
Disappointment.
This was the result of her sacrifices for the family.
Yes. From the perspective of the baroness, everything could not have been a big deal.
Still, she didnât think she would answer like that.
âOkay, Citrina. I donât know what the problem is, but yes, I was wrong. This mother apologizes.â
Maybe that wasnât a lie. Citrina looked at the baronessâs few grown strands of gray hair. It must have also been difficult for her because of her husbandâs gambling.
âJust because the Baroness was also in a difficult position and apologized to me doesnât make any difference.â
Citrina made up her mind. Even though the baroness had it rough, it does not change the fact that she had Citrina do all the work and put her all expectations and love on Elena.
If you are poor, love will fly out the window. However, they had many opportunities. Such an opportunity to have them live happily enough.
âYou should have apologized earlier.â
Citrinaâs body trembled. It seemed like she had chills.
She clasped the table tightly as she said what was needed to be said.
The face of the baroness was getting impatient.
âCitrina, I said I was sorry.â
âAn apology doesnât mean it has to be accepted. I donât want your apology.â
The baronessâ face was washed dry. Tears fell from her eyes. However, it was not comparable to the calluses on Citrinaâs fingertips and the burden placed on her shoulder.
The baroness spoke again, âCitrina, Iâm telling you,when Elena will do well is when we will be well. This is an important time for Elena. She may succeed and be elected as a knight of the Imperial Palace. But you, you werenât smart. So if we sacrifice a little more, then we can⦠Could you consider Elena and give her a chance?â
Her speech was done. It was a voice almost like a last-ditch defense.
Citrina felt like she was on a parallel line where the conversation couldnât go anymore. She sighed.
âI want to live my life too!â
Her voice rang out loud in the room. It was unprecedented for Citrina to raise her voice. The baroness swallowed her breath in a hurry.
âI want to live. I want to.â
Citrinaâs words stopped.
After hearing her loud voice, Baroness Foluin sat with a blank face.
âYou tooâ¦â
âPlease speak.â
âYou too⦠Have a life?â
Ridiculous.
Sheâs asking if she has a life too? So was she just an ornament that was unmoving?
âWhy do you ask me such an obvious question?â
Citrina waited for a long time. But contrary to what she expected, only silence fell in the room. After a few seconds in that situation, âStay there.â
Stomp, Desian walked in.
Citrina didnât even know she was shaking. Behind her, Desianâs hands gently grasped her trembling shoulders. The strange warmth from his cold fingertips gave Citrina a slight relief albeit she felt feeble.
Citrina gave a long sigh.
After this, at least all relations with the baroness are over. That was what her intuition was telling her.
The conversation fell silent. It was Desian who naturally intervened in that silence.
âRina,â Desian called Citrina by nickname.
It was only then that the baroness remembered the fact that she once had the nickname Rina.
âCitrinaâ¦â The nickname Rina did not come out from the lips of the baroness.
She shut her lips after calling Citrinaâs name, because it was already too late for her to realize. She was no longer entitled to call Citrina by her nickname.
âWhat do you want to do?â
Citrina lifted herself up. She almost stumbled, but still stood upright. Desianâs arms were tightly wrapped around her.
âNever.â
âNever?â
Desianâs voice was so gentle it made her want to cry.
â⦠I donât ever want to meet you.â
âEverything will be up to you now.â
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