13.

Y/N

It's been a whole week and I was still MIA from my family and my social media. I also didn't leave the house and the only person I physically had in my house was Dani. I didn't see Michael once I gave him his bags of things. I also didn't hear from him either which I already knew I wasn't so I wasn't going to trip on it.

I was laying in my bed around 7 o clock at night washed and dressed in house clothes that I threw on for bed

like I did everyday of this week just laying there. All of this honestly sucked and I was trying to figure out what I was going to do. This woman has made a mockery of the things that I have been through with Jevon, he cheated on me with her, they ended up being with each other and she would try and gain clout off of me any slight chance she could get. Why the fuck would I help this woman out?! Why would I seriously go back and endure all of this shit I've been through with Jevon all over again just to be in their drama?!

If Maya felt she one upped me all these years I felt like she needed to stand on that shit and deal with the consequences of that. But then again I knew how I felt being in that position of being abused, crying at night wondering when he was going to be done with me, hell sometimes wondered if this was my fault. At one point I just wanted him to pull the trigger or kill Myself because I was THAT scared.

Michael may never understand this but me not telling him never came from a Malicious state. I wanted to talk to him but he was no where to be found and if I tell him that, I didn't want him to be further upset or mad at me, thinking I was blaming him for what happened to me. How do you honestly tell anyone this has happened to you especially a man that you love? I was scared to even tell my parents imagine actually telling Michael how I felt at the time and what I been through. Once I got out here I felt a sense of freedom, spoke to my counselor and thought I was okay. Michael knows I didn't know that Maya was showing up that night at the restaurant for Amari's birthday. I didn't understand why he was so mad at me for this I was scared at the time and not I just want to forget about it and deal with it my way.

One thing I did I agreed with Michael on was just calling it a quits because honestly I clearly have more shit to figure out and if you can't handle me and be there for me when I need you to be there for me but I'm constantly always there for you then I'm clearly wasting my time. I love him so much and it hurts to let go but If he can't see that then there's nothing I can do about it.

I decided to get my iPad and do at least something productive since I've been in the house all week laying down. I head downstairs going to go sit in my living room to get out of my room. I went through my emails seeing emails from my manager and lawyers about the situation asking me if I were okay and whenever I was ready to take action they were there. I just slid out of my email going to my messages seeing endless blue dots next to people names including texts from Laila, my mother and Will. My father didn't reach out to me nor did I really care if he did because honestly Will was my dad.

I seen a text from Ayanna which caused me to get teary eyed some because she was always an open door and always there for me she should've been a person I confided in but I was scared.

Yani💗: I seen what's been going on Y/N and Brandon and I are both in support of what you choose to do next. Remember tough times doesn't last, but tough people like you do! Never give up when the going gets tough because life will reward you with a beautiful gift. All you need to do is have faith. We all love you to the moon and back over here and ANYTHING that you need you know Brandon and I got you without a doubt. You don't have to text because i know that this is a lot but I love you and pray everyone gets what they deserve out of this situation.

I read as I just wiped my tears away "loving" her text from a week ago when it first happened then swiped out of our messages. I went online trying to find a home out in Atlanta to buy. That's what I've been wanting for a minute now and if me and Michael aren't going to be together Why not go get one. My grandmother was staying in the one in New York and I just didn't want to be in that atmosphere so why not go to Atlanta. Amari, Ayanna and Brandon is out there. Besides just to lay all of this shit to rest I might just help Maya out and never have to deal with her ass ever again.

Part of me think it did happen to her but the way she went about doing it was for attention and clout because everything was through social media nothing she did was legal action. But I didn't want to take that chance on possibly getting her out of a situation I've been in. I found a couple of houses and sent them to the real estate agent I've been talking to for a minute that was out in Atlanta about going to do a house tour for these houses.

There was a ring at my doorbell as I looked away from the pictures of the houses I was looking at, at the time. I read 8:47 PM hearing another ring at the doorbell. I slowly got up going towards the door as I slightly opened the door, peeking to see Michael. I just opened the door further as he was about to step in but I stopped him. "Michael I honestly don't want to argue so if you're angry it's not even best to come in" I expressed.

"No I'm straight I want to talk to you" he said as I stepped to the side letting him in.

I closed the door behind us and locked it before we walked into the living room to sit. We both sat on the floor with our backs against the couch. "How have you been?" He asked as I moved my iPad to my lap. "I honestly don't want to be bothered" I admitted as he looked between my iPad and I. "So we break up and You plan on moving back to Atlanta?" He asked as I just sighed to myself getting up to go put my iPad on the end table of the couch.

Michael just played with his hands, clearly angry looking between the wall and I. "Why not? It's been something I've been wanting to do, you have a place out in atlanta Why can't I do the same?" I asked. "You know you have a history of just leaving" He said Being petty. "And you have a history of not being there" I simply shot back as I felt him look over at me but I just shook my head and stared at the blank 70 inch tv that was mounted on the wall.

"When have I've not been there for you?" Michael asked. "Michael I don't care. What are we supposed to be talking about? so we can talk and get this shit over with" I asked as he just looked at me and spoke up. "Every time we get into an argument its like you don't care" he said. "Because literally out of all the shit that's going on right now and the information you just found out, you're not worried about it" I started off.

"You're picking at me because I want to buy a house in Georgia for what?" I questioned.

"Do you understand how hard it is knowing that has happened to you?" He asked. "Michael I can't change the past it's almost like your punishing me for this. Like this is an easy topic to talk about" I said then shook my head. "I'm not everybody else Y/N. You should've told me" He stressed. "And for you to do what?" I asked "act the way you're acting now? Break up with me sooner? Like be fucking for real with this situation what were you going to do because I've tried calling you" I admitted as he looked over at me and I just looked away feeling a tear leave my eyes.

"I might not show it but as much as you're mad and angry at me I'm mad and angry at you I can't blame you for what has happened though" I admitted feeling tears threatening to come out while looking over at him. "I've called you when he placed his hands on me and did the things he's done to me but you didn't want to talk, I conveniently got a voice mail every time something was done to me due to you being mad that I left to go to school in atlanta" I explained.

"Y/N" he started off as I shook my head "I let you talk a week ago now let me talk" I simply said as he went quiet. "This past week has been a living hell and the one man I thought would be by my side because I thought he loved me unconditionally was you." I admitted looking over at him as tears rolled down my cheeks. "The man I expect every time to protect and be there but he's never there or he's there when everything is okay." I explained and shook my head. "But what about when everything is not okay?" I asked him wiping my tears away as he tried to reach for me but I leaned away shaking my head.

"You want me to be your wife so badly and for us to start a family but why?" I questioned. "Y/N because I love you, we've been best friends since kids why would I give that up?" He asked. "You gave it up as soon as you found out I was raped Michael. I know you love me but I want you to give me a real actual answer for why you want those things with me because if you can't stick with me through this how will I know you can stick with me through marriage or pregnancy?" I questioned.

"Y/N what other answer is there for me to give you beside "I love you?" He asked. "Michael you loved me as a best friend all these years I know you love me because from what it's feeling like you're just with me so no one else can have me" I brought up. "I don't want anybody else to have you though but that isn't it" he admitted as I nodded. "You're supposed to be someone I spend the rest of my entire life with and I raise my kids with....why would I do that with a man who just walks away when things get hard?" I asked

"So tell me why marriage is something you want with ME" I repeated as he just shook his head. "Babe. I love you and I want this. I should've never said what I said I should've listened and never broke things off. I acted out of my emotions and I'm sorry" he apologized.

"I love you. I just want you to be better whether it's with me or with another woman" I admitted. "So we're really calling it a quits?" Michael asked. "If this is something we truly want with each other then I'm sure we'll find our way back like we always do but right now you have what you have going on and I have what I have going on so" I explained then placed my hand up for him to shake it.

He just looked between me and my hand as I tried not to laugh. "Girl" he started off "come here" he said making me smile. He grabbed my chin softly and kissed my lips. I slowly kissed back as we pulled away and he wrapped his arms around me while I laid on his chest. "I'm going to do better" he assured feeling him rub my back and kiss my head. "I know you are" I honestly said smiling to myself.