Beyond His Control: Chapter 7

As I walk off, the door behind me creaks.

A devious smile forms on my lips.

I glance over my shoulder. She’s peeking out.

I have bait.

I’ve waited so long with this information because I know that in the wrong hands it could mean my imminent death. But she’s ready now. She hates that place while at the same time, she cares for the people there. It’s the perfect combination, a storm waiting to burst. And with my child in her belly, I’ve secured my own safety because she’d never betray me and risk her son or daughter growing up without a father. Even though she threatened me with that knife, she’d never go through with it.

“What did you just say?” she mutters.

With my hands in my pockets, I turn around. “I want them gone.”

Her pupils dilate. “The patriarchs?”

“All. Of. It.”

She blinks a couple of times, completely flabbergasted.

I’d probably do the same if that kind of a bombshell was dropped in front of me.

“Why?” she asks.

“Because the people are suffering,” I explain.

Her eyes narrow. “No, this isn’t about the people. You don’t care about them. So what is this about exactly?”

I run my tongue across my lips. “Your mother and I made a deal a long time ago. I would bring you with me on a trip and set you free so you could live your life here for a few years. Then I’d bring you back in.”

She opens her door wider and folds her arms, waiting for a further explanation.

“You’d know what freedom meant … and then you’d learn what the Family you were born into really does to people.”

“And my mother knew all of this?” she asks.

“Not the part about destroying the patriarchs. But she knew I wanted to bring you back in again. She agreed because she wanted to give you the best chance. She just didn’t think I’d actually be able to find you and bring you back in.”

“She trusted you with my life,” she says.

“She knew exactly what we agreed to,” I say. “She hates the other patriarchs as much as I do. And no woman from the outside world wants her child to grow up in a place like that…”

“But the president is her husband,” she says, seeming confused.

I raise a brow. “You saw the bruises, didn’t you?”

Her face darkens, and she smashes her lips together. “He hurt her …”

I walk toward her and lower my head as a sign of respect. Marsha is her mother after all. “She’s been hurt many times.”

Tears well up in her eyes. “I hate him. I hate him more than anything.”

“I do too, which is why I want to overthrow them.” I grab her hands and lock them tightly with mine. “We could rule the community together. You and I. Together. We could bring peace to the people there.”

Natalie

I try to wrap my head around this. Can I believe him? What if he’s lying to get me to come back with him?

My hands slip out of his, and I take a step back, hesitant to trust him.

“You’ve seen what it’s like at the community now. You know how toxic it can be,” he says. “I want to change that, and we can do that together.”

“It won’t be any different with you as the president,” I say. With each step I take back, he takes one forward until we’re back in my apartment again. “You’re the same as them.”

“It will be different with you by my side,” he says, closing the door behind him. “You’d be a queen.”

“What guarantee can you give me that things will change?” I say.

No, I shouldn’t even be thinking about this.

“You’re my everything, Natalie,” he says, closing the distance between us. “I want you to be safe.”

“I wasn’t safe there,” I reply.

“You will be from now on. I promise.”

He reaches for my stomach, and the second he touches me, emotional turmoil coils my heart. “My baby is in there. I will protect you both.”

I’m so confused right now, and he’s only adding fuel to the flames. Especially with the way he’s looking at me with those sultry eyes from underneath his lashes.

But how can he ever protect me from himself?

From his own debilitating need to rule?

From his own savage cruelty?

And from his own dirty filthy needs?

“I can’t,” I mutter, my voice hoarse. “I can’t trust myself around you.”

He cups my face and leans his forehead against mine. “I know you don’t, but we can work through this.”

I shake my head. “How? I won’t let you put my baby at risk.”

I don’t know why I’m so fiercely protective of it, but I am.

“I won’t ever put him in danger,” he says.

“You say that now, but what about Emmy? You put us at risk and now look what happened to her.”

“I will fix it. I’ll make sure she’s okay. I promise,” he says, still firmly clutching my face while he practically stares straight into my soul. “I fucking need you, Natalie. I need you more than I need air to breathe.”

Every time he speaks my name, it’s as if lighting strikes me. I can’t resist, can’t let go of this infatuation, no matter how hard I try. The minute he stepped back into my life, I was already lost to him.

And when he leans in to kiss me, I let him.

“Please …” I beg him, trying to resist.

“I can’t stop …” he murmurs against my mouth. “I can’t let you go.”

I shiver. “You have to. This is where I’m safe. Where our baby is safe.”

He plants another kiss on the side of my cheeks and leans back. “You’re so cold. What happened to you out there?”

“What do you mean?” He’s completely changed the topic, and I can’t stop shivering.

“You don’t feel it?” he asks, touching my arms and face to check my temp. “You’re way too cold right now.”

He suddenly lifts me and carries me into the bathroom. I’m completely dumbfounded by his affection for me that I let him do what he wants without fighting back.

“You’ve been outside far too long. That hospital should’ve taken better care of you,” he says, and he pulls off my shirt in one go.

My eyes widen, and I cover myself as he peels off my pants too, leaving me in nothing but panties and a flimsy bra. He turns on the faucet, and the hot water starts to flow … right over me. But the water feels so nice, and I stop shivering right after.

Maybe I was cold, but I just didn’t notice it because of everything going on.

I lean back and enjoy the heat as Noah takes off his shoes and then his tie and throws it in a corner. He doesn’t seem to care that he’s about to get wet too, as he keeps coming toward me until he’s under the shower too, clothes and all.

I snort. “What about your clothes?”

“Those can be replaced,” he says. “I’m more concerned about keeping my baby and his mother safe.”

I don’t know why, but that brought butterflies to my stomach. Shit. Why can’t I let him go? Why can’t I stop feeling this way about a man who’s obviously bad for me?

Even when I’m free and out of the community, he still manages to break me into a million pieces. And now he’s building me back up again, brick by brick.

He slowly wraps both arms around me and pulls me in for an embrace. “They say body heat is the fastest way to warm up …”

A tiny laugh escapes my mouth. He’s making up excuses to come close, but I’m not sure I mind. Being back in the real world has never felt lonelier. No one knows what I’ve gone through … except for him.

Maybe that’s why I’m so attracted to him in the first place. He knows better than any other man what I sacrificed to get here, and it created an unbreakable connection. I can feel it in my bones. The moment he touched me, everything faded away. When he holds me, it’s as though I can handle it all, as if I could take on the entire world with just these two hands.

He leans back to swipe a loose strand of hair out of my face and then presses a soft kiss onto my lips. Heat flows through my body, and I can’t help but kiss him back.

One kiss turns into two until I lose count, and my hands wrap around his neck in a desperate attempt to get closer. Maybe I’m desperate, or maybe I’m lonely, but after going through hell, I need this love more than ever, and it’s killing me.