Siblin’ Rivalry

After a few days of feeling sorry for myself, I am ready to get back out there.

I can’t stay in this house any longer, so I agree to go out for mid-week drinks with Sara and some of the others.

I don’t ask if Tobias will be there. I’d hope that if he is about to become a father he would be staying home and saving his money.

I call Tanner, who says he will get me on his way down at eight. He doesn’t mention Tobias, so I assume it will just be the two of us.

At eight-thirty, Tanner’s truck pulls up. I’m pissed at him, as I feel like I have been bitten to hell while sitting waiting on the porch.

“What the fuck, Tanner, you said eight,” I groan as I open the door to his truck.

To my dismay, I am faced with Tobias, who is looking effortlessly hotter than ever in his jeans, hoodie, and blue baseball cap.

I have to force my eyes away from him as I take my seat, trying to leave a gap so my body doesn’t uncontrollably yearn for him.

He lifts his cap off his head awkwardly and runs his hand over his hair. He looks like he wants to say something, but I keep my eyes away from him. I don’t want to listen to anything he has to say.

“So, this isn’t awkward,” Tanner utters in an attempt to curb the silence.

I see Tobias risk a peek, and I turn to look out of the window, staring sightlessly into the darkness.

As we are about to enter the bar, Tanner turns to us and places a hand on each of our shoulders.

“Right, kids,” he says, like a parent warning their bickering children. “I want you two to behave in here, no awkwardness. If you aren’t together anymore, just be adults about it, yeah, and move the hell on.”

I lose Tanner and Tobias in the crowd as I head straight to the bar. My legs are still itchy and I’m sure I have been feasted on while waiting for my ride.

I am examining my legs when Sara comes over and hugs me. “I’m so glad you came,” she yelps as she squeezes tighter.

She gives me more info on the Tobias and Lynn situation, and it appears Lynn doesn’t know yet if she is pregnant or not.

I’m mad that Tobias couldn’t tell me any of this, as it would have made things a little less difficult.

Apparently, as she has had both positive and negative tests. She has to wait for confirmation in a few days when she goes for a scan at the hospital in Nashville.

I drink to block out all the drama. I knew coming here would be a bad idea. The last thing I need is to cause a scene and draw attention to myself.

My eyes deceive me the more I drink. They will not stop trailing Tobias, and he knows it too as he keeps meeting my gaze.

~Why the fuck does he have to look so hot?~

My heart is literally breaking. It’s torture looking at him and not being able to touch him. Our eyes lock in a lingering gaze.

We have a shared understanding—we both know how intense our feelings are for each other.

I know I love him. I love him more than anyone I have ever loved in my life. I was prepared to drop my guard for him, to adapt to this life for him.

I would have done anything but look where that got me: sitting here, heart in pieces while I prepare to watch him father someone else’s child.

~Fuck that! No more princess~.

I’m Ella. Ella who takes no shit, does what she pleases, and gets what she wants.

If I were with my friends back home, Carla would step up. I know exactly what she would say about this situation and the way I’m reacting.

She’s the friend who becomes the greatest motivational speaker in situations like this, and I am really missing her right now.

I sink a few drinks in honor of my past life and a few shots in honor of my lost love—I’m grieving right now!

As Tanner and Lee stand on either side of me, trying to teach me how to two-step, I laugh and try and forget the dumb cowboy who has thrown his life away on a local girl who he doesn’t love but will most likely stand by because he is a dumb-arse cowboy.

I drunkenly stand on Tanner’s foot again and he curses.

“Sorry,” I laugh as I hang onto his shoulder to steady myself.

He smells good and as we laugh our lips get closer.

I know what I’m doing, I’m drunk, but I know exactly what I’m doing. Lee panics and disappears. I assume he can see what’s coming and doesn’t want to be around for the explosion that will erupt as a result.

When our lips meet, I imagine I’m kissing Tobias. Tanner is wearing a cap as Tobias would, but his chin is smooth and he kisses differently.

His hands don’t go to my face like Tobias’s do; they go straight to my arse. He’s bolder and more expressive than his brother.

We get well into it and I’m starting to enjoy it when we are suddenly thrust apart. Like dogs with locked jaws, we are dragged apart and separated. Tanner waves his fist and goes at Tobias, who is holding me back.

Tanner gets close to Tobias, and his elbow goes into Tobias’s head and causes him to stumble.

“Why her?” Tobias shouts as he throws out his forearm and jabs Tanner hard in the face.

Tanner falls to the floor at the pressure of Tobias’s punch.

He is on his hands and knees now, scrambling toward a chair to pull himself up when Tobias catches him and drags him to his feet.

Tanner isn’t giving in, though, and I have seen enough. I get in between the two of them and stretch my arms out, creating distance between them.

Lee and Waylon get in too, and we create an impossible barrier for them to get through.

“I’m going to fucking kill him,” Tobias roars.

I have never seen him so mad. His nostrils flare in line with his heavy chest, which is inflating and deflating under his hoodie.

“Get him out of here,” Waylon shouts as Lee tries to shut down a drunken, grinning Tanner.

Waylon pulls Tobias out of the back fire exit. I follow the two of them, feeling some responsibility for my actions.

“Just leave,” Tobias shouts at me.

When I look into his baby blue eyes, all I see is hatred and rage toward me.

“I’m sorry,” I mumble. “I…”

He interjects. “With anyone else,” he says. “I never want to look at you again.”

Tears fall from my eyes as I run back into the bar and call my uncle to collect me.

I’m still crying as I wait outside for Frankie. I can’t get the way Tobias looked at me out of my head.

~What have I done?~

“Isobella, what’s happened?” Frankie asks as I climb into his truck with my wet, red, puffy face.

“I should have listened to you,” I cry.

“Is this about a Kinsley boy?” he asks.

I nod my head and hear him sigh loudly. Thankfully, he doesn’t ask any more questions for the rest of the ride home.

***

I don’t get up the next day to sort the horses and chickens, and I don’t leave my bed. Frankie brings me a coffee and some pancakes midday and kisses my hair as he leaves without saying anything.

After a day, I answer Sara’s call and she updates me on the situation. She says Lynn is going for her scan today, but I don’t care anymore.

Tobias will never forgive me for kissing Tanner, and I dread to think about the rupture I have caused in their family.

“You have a visitor,” Frankie says as he peeps into my bedroom.

“Is it Tobias?” I ask.

He shakes his head. “The philanderer.”

I smile for the first time in two days. “Tell him I will be down in a minute.”

My hair is in a messy bun and I’m wearing Tobias’s Nashville T-shirt when I join Tanner on the porch.

“Did Frankie not let you in the house?” I ask as I take a seat next to him.

He turns and smiles at me, and I am reminded about the shameful night by his bruised face.

“Oh shit, are you okay?” I ask.

He grins and nods his head. “Nothing I haven’t had before,” he says.

“I’m so embarrassed by my behavior. I’m sorry you got pulled into our shit.”

“Don’t sweat it, I wanted to check you were okay. Tobias is a fucking mess.”

“Are you two okay now?” I ask.

He waves his hand. “Sort of. He’s really cut up about you, so I’ve been staying out of his way.”

I hug my knees into my chest as I look out into the distance. “I’m sure he will get over it,” I mumble.

When Tanner leaves, I get my ass in gear. I agree to go into town with Frankie. I could do with filling up on comfort food, plus I need to test-drive some cars.

Frankie doesn’t mention anything about the other night, and I love him for his tactfulness.

He still has that horrible rattling in his chest, so I buy him a cough medicine when I get my snacks. Whether he will drink it is another matter—you really can only take the horse to water!

I test-drive a couple of cars, but I go for the top of the range metallic red BMW X4 Coupe.

Mike in the showroom allows me to put my foot down and I choose this one purely for the thrill and adrenaline surge it gives me when I take it to its max.

Mike makes a swift exit out of the car as we pull back into the showroom.

“Wow, girl, you floored it. I think I need to change my pants after that,” he says.

He looks thankful when I say that’s the one and he doesn’t have to climb along for any further thrill rides.

I apologize and explain that I have a lot of pent up hurt. He advises me to take the extra insurance out.

“Delivery sometime next week, we will be in touch,” he announces as he waves us off.

When I wake up the next morning at my usual six-thirty, I decide to go for my run. I push in my earbuds and set off on my usual route.

I forgot how good running makes me feel. By the time I am passing the small pond, I have almost forgotten my problems. I slow into a fast walk as I get near to Antony’s so I can use the Wi-Fi as I pass through.

I am about to pick up the pace again when I see him. It’s Tobias. He is doing something with his horse and there is no way I can pass him without him seeing me.

I look back and contemplate retracing my tracks, but he looks in my direction.

Our eyes meet, but he breaks it off as I nervously continue toward him.