Now We’re Fighting

“Everything okay?” Tobias asks as I return to his bedroom.

I wonder how to approach the topic as I look at him and smile.

“What’s going on?” I ask hesitantly.

I don’t want what we have to be shattered by anything. I have never let my guard down as I have with Tobias. He’s the only man I’ve ever trusted to have my heart, and I hope I haven’t made a big mistake!

He stretches out his arm and pulls me by my hand onto the bed. I pull back as he starts to kiss and lick the back of my neck seductively.

“What’s the issue with Lynn? I just got told there is some kind of issue with you and her?”

He sighs hard and releases my body from his grip, but he doesn’t speak. I watch him and wait, but he shuts down.

“Come on then, what’s going on? Are you still fucking her?”

He shakes his head. “No, of course not. It’s nothing to concern you.”

“Just tell me what’s going on then.”

I start to pull my clothes on as I wait for him to explain. But instead, he sits on the end of the bed with his head in his hands.

“You don’t trust me?” he asks.

Oh, and I thought he was different. What a dick move, trying to turn this on me!

“Don’t turn this on me. I thought I knew you, but something is going down and you’re not telling me.”

“Maybe it’s not any of your business. Not everything’s about you, princess.”

I walk out of his bedroom and yell over my shoulder.

“Fine, then, don’t tell me. Stay single and keep your fucking secrets.”

“Isobella,” he shouts after me.

I struggle to unlock his front door and as I fidget with his stupid key, he approaches me from behind.

He pushes his weight onto me and jams me against the door, his hands flat against the wall on either side of me.

Under normal circumstances, I would be turned on by this, impressed by his passion, but right now I’m so mad at him.

He leans into my hair and growls into my ear. “Don’t be such a spoiled brat. Don’t run at the first hurdle.”

“I asked you to explain what has been going on, but you’re refusing to. It’s fine. You don’t have to explain anything,” I reply. I try to thrust him off me, but he’s too strong—my push barely moves him.

“Fine,” he snaps as he pulls away from me and releases my body. “You’ll be back.”

“Like fuck, I will,” I bellow, slamming the door as hard as I can on my way out.

I march all the way back to Frankie’s, mumbling to myself, calling Tobias every name under the sun. I am too angry to cry. I really thought he was different!

I replay the scene again and again, analyzing every word said—or, in his case, unsaid.

If it was nothing, he would have just talked to me about it, which means there is something. And if it’s something he can’t tell me about, then it involves us.

I bet he’s still sleeping with her—that’s why he took so long to give in to me. I can’t believe how stupid I’ve been. Frankie warned me, but I thought I knew better. Tobias has well and truly played me.

“Hey, I thought you were out at the bar,” Frankie says as I tramp into the house.

“Nope,” I reply. “I’m going to bed.”

I call Sara when I get to my bedroom, but her phone rings out. She won’t be able to hear it over the music. She isn’t one to sit on her phone, either, so I probably won’t get ahold of her now until tomorrow.

Tobias

Princess, come back to mine.

Ella

I’m not your fucking princess.

Tobias

Well this is 100% princess behavior.

Ella

FUCK YOU.

I’m ready to go if he wants to continue this—I have my caps lock on.

But I don’t get any further texts from him.

After the anger and adrenaline subside, I feel nothing but sadness.

I thought I had met the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I had even thought about what our children would look like—something I have never, ever done with a man before. He just seemed so different, so genuine.

I finally fall asleep around 3 a.m. after shedding a few tears and leering at pictures of him on my phone.

When I wake up in the morning and turn over, I suddenly feel compacted in my bed—like it has reduced in size overnight. I rub my eyes and when I finally open them, I see the back of Tobias.

~What the—!~

He’s lying in my fucking bed.

I’m confused.

One—how the hell did he get in here? Two—how did I not notice him lie next to me? And three—what the actual fuck!

As I sit up, he rolls onto his back and I wonder if he’s dead. He is fully clothed in his blue jeans and a simple white T-shirt. His legs dangle off the side of the bed as it’s so fucking small.

He does look cute, though. How can I be mad at him? He is absolutely gorgeous. His stubbled face looks calm as he sleeps, and I will him to wake so I can get another glimpse of those bright blue eyes.

“Hey, arsehole,” I finally say as I shove him.

He smiles in his sleep, and I have to remind myself why I’m mad at him.

“Princess… I love you,” he mutters.

He’s drunk, it’s 6:30 a.m. and he’s still pissed. He must have drunk himself into oblivion to still be comatose at this time.

I lean into him. “If you love me, tell me what the deal is with you and Lynn.”

His eyes are still shut, and as I move close to him, I get a hit of his familiar scent. I want to jump his bones so bad right now, but I can’t let this go.

Something has happened, and if he can’t talk to me about these things now, what hope do we have of having a relationship?

He rolls over and grunts. “She’s pregnant.”

~WHAT THE FUCK!~

“Get the fuck out of my bed,” I yell.

He starts to stir, and I push him off the bed. When he hits the floor with a thud, his eyes dart open.

“I’m sorry,” he says from his place on the floor. His blue eyes are trying to lure me in.

I narrow my eyes at him and shake my head. I need him to leave before I rip his gorgeous head off.

“Just go,” I say sternly. I need him to listen to me. I can’t fall apart in front of him.

I lean against the wall as he pulls himself up off the floor. His eyes are on me. They look sad and apologetic, but no amount of apologizing will take away the fact that he is about to have a baby with another woman.

He stretches his hand out to me and I shake my head again.

“Please just leave me alone,” I whisper.

His eyes remain on me in a fixed expression. “I mean it when I say I love you and I didn’t sleep with her once I met you.” He staggers into the wall as he heads out my door.

I want to shout back to him but I can’t. I can’t be with a man and watch him make a family with another woman. I just know I won’t be able to deal with that.

I take a shower and head out for my run. I need to keep my routine and focus. I start university in a few weeks, so I will have little time for anything else.

It’s a good thing that whatever we had has ended—I can focus on my course now and focus on getting back to England as soon as I complete it, if not sooner.

I run faster than normal and beat my record by minutes. Then I sort the horses and chickens, and it’s not even 9 a.m.

“Hey,” Travis shouts as he heads over to the stables.

I contemplate running, but I stay to see what he has to say. He might not even know, but I imagine everyone knows something by now. It’s hardly a place you can keep a secret.

“What’s up, Travis?” I say as I kick my feet nervously in the dirt.

“Ella, you two need to sort this out. He’s a fucking mess.”

I look up at Travis as he moves his stare into the distance.

“It’s just one of them things, bad luck. He’s a good guy, so he’ll stand by the baby if she is pregnant, but it’s clear to see he loves you.”

I sigh. “I can’t be involved in that mess. I need to protect myself.”

He nods his head. “I understand, and I’m sure he will too one day.” He turns his gaze back on me. “But you should know he’s never been with anyone the way he is with you. He actually laughs again, and we’ve all missed that these last few years.”

“I care a lot about him. He’s a great guy, but I’m new to all this too. Throw a baby into the mix, and that just steps it up way too high over my head.”

He smiles. “Well, we never know what plans the good Lord has for us. I’m sure Tobias will take the path intended for him.”

There goes that religious shit again! I’m pretty sure the good Lord wouldn’t want Tobias to father a child with someone he can barely tolerate. Where I come from, they would call that too much whiskey and a split condom!

I head up to the big house and sit on Antony’s porch as I use his Wi-Fi. I have some emails for university to deal with, and I finally have the message from my dad saying I can go choose my car.

Thank the fucking Lord—I can finally take my path intended, right outta this ranch!

I watch the stories of my friends back home, and for the first time in a while, I miss them; I miss home.

I replay the one of Carla and Jen dancing to Bastille. He’s playing live, and it looks amazing—the champagne is flowing, and they are all hammered.

The men in designer suits flash across my screen, in their showy cars and thousand-pound jackets.

Another shows them at some after-party, all having the time of their lives and such a world away from my new life. The screen showed people openly snorting cocaine through fifty-pound notes.

I used it socially, and that was another reason my dad wanted me out of London—the bad habits!

I sigh loudly as I wonder which world I belong to now?

This feels worse than before because now I don’t feel like I belong in any!