winter

it's freezing

i want to take this hot tea and pour it all over my freezing dead body

no matter what i do i'll always be cold

i don't have enough me to keep me warm

just enough me to want to freeze forever

there's no comfort zone, no home base

only in my dreams do i feel like i can be safe in the arms of unknown lovers and perfect bodies and mountains of blankets topped with summer skies and flower fields

then i wake up in the middle of winter with pillows replacing the person i wish i could have