Soul Deep

Tania’s POV

Elder Mildred’s Home

My jaw dropped open. “Wait a minute, how can a mate return her wolf?”

“Our wolves are given to us by Luna herself, but how do wolves recognize their mate,” she asked.

“By smell,” Bobby said. “As soon as I scented her clothing, I knew she was mine.”

“But why? Why does her scent call to you? How do you KNOW it is your mate?”

I thought about it. “I don’t know, we were always taught that our mates’ scent would be recognized by our wolf. We talked more about what happened AFTER you found him than anything else.”

“True, because we still have rules regarding mating, and it is important mates are respected. There are theories as to how we know our mate’s scent, but I believe it is because we share a part of them.” I squeezed his hand and looked at him. “Most Packs teach that you are born with two parts to your soul, your human and your wolf parts, right?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Yet we find some who have human mates, and they give them their wolf in mating?”

“True.”

“Others do not find their mates, they choose another wolf or a human. They can change a human, but the mating is never the same as with a fated mate. There is a bond, but it isn’t as deep or as satisfying as those with true mates. There have been multiple studies on this over the years; choice mates are not as happy as true mates, but we’ve always assumed it was because they knew they abandoned a true mate out there somewhere.”

“It makes sense, my parents stressed the importance of waiting for your true mate. It’s why when the Council tried to push Talia to mate Alpha Todd to unify the Pack, she refused.” I laughed. “Well, that and he was more than twice her age and a major-league asshole.”

“I’d like to give you another theory, one that I think fits the data better. I believe we are born as werewolves with three parts to our soul, two major and one fragment. The fragment is a piece of our fated mate’s soul.”

Bobby caught on first. “So when you meet your fate mate…”

“Your wolf recognizes the soul of his mate that is already with him. In essence you find what you are missing, and the mating unites the pieces in both of you.”

I looked over at Bobby, it was a more romantic way to think of it. “So Bobby has a piece of my wolf soul in him?”

“I believe so. Being able to change someone with no wolf proves you can transfer a part of a wolf soul, even if it is your own. The example I found proved it is possible to transfer a wolf soul of your true mate and give her that back.”

“Why can’t anyone bite me? All the doctors said it wouldn’t matter.”

She shook her head. “I can’t tell you for sure. Maybe the wolf soul recognizes someone else should be there. Maybe the hole in your soul cannot be filled by a different soul.” She finished her glass. “I believe that when you take a choice mate, the rejected soul is pushed out and dies. That is why no one has ever found a fated mate after they have mated another. It’s all my theory, backed up by history and lore. There’s only one way for you to find out, and you’re bound to do it anyway.”

I nodded. “We need to complete the mating.”

“Yes. Worst case, I’m wrong and you stay human, and he stays your mate. You can have the best life you can, given the differences in your lifespans. Best case, he gives you your wolf soul back and it fits like the last piece in the puzzle, because it belongs there.”

“Will it be enough?” I didn’t want to get my hopes up and have them dashed again.

“How much is one percent of infinity, Tania? One thousandth? If your soul is boundless, so is a piece of it. Whatever Luna wills, may it come to be.” She took the empty lemonade glass back from me. “Now scoot, you two. You have better things to do than listen to an old lady rambling.”

Bobby shifted under me, the talk of mating had gotten him excited and I could feel him pressing it into my thighs. “I can think of a few things we can do,” he said as he waggled his eyes.

“When I’m ready,” I said. “I’m human now, you can’t just fall back on the bond to get what you want. You have to use romance, you have to date me, seduce me and love me.”

“No problem,” he said. “Any plans for lunch?”

“Why sir, are you asking me on a date?”

“I am. I was thinking a picnic by the waterfall. I’ll have the kitchen pack some food for us.”

I smiled, I loved that place. “I would love to picnic with you.” I stood up and leaned down and gave Mildred a hug. “Thank you for looking into this for me, you’ve given me hope again,” I said.

“Love finds a way, Tania. It always does.”

Bobby thanked her, and we held hands as we walked back to the Pack House. He must have linked the kitchen, because a basket filled with food and drink was waiting for us. Another bag contained towels and a blanket. “We’re taking my truck this time,” he said as he grabbed the stuff. We loaded up and took the dirt road away from the Pack House, stopping at a small parking lot. “It’s not far from here,” he said.

The noon heat was oppressive, and my clothes were soaked by the time we got there. He set the supplies in the shade on a rock. “Swim first,” I said. He agreed, and we stripped off our clothes. I knew what to expect this time when we jumped into the pool together. It was a shock, then as we got used to it, it was better. We didn’t swim long, pulling ourselves out on a rock to dry off. We stayed nude, it was cooler that way.

He laid the blanket down on a patch of grass and moss in the shade, then we sat and ate. The kitchen had made Italian sandwiches with pasta salad, fruit and cookies. “That was excellent,” I said as I finished. I gathered the stuff and put it back in the basket, bending over with my back to him. I might even have wiggled a little, knowing from the little growls he let out that I was pushing him.

I turned around and walked towards him. He was looking at me, his wolf forward, eyes black with lust. I straddled his legs, lowering myself until I was sitting in his lap with my hands around his neck. “Bobby,” I asked quietly. “I want you to mate me.”

“Are you sure? I can wait until you are ready. I don’t want to hurt you or set back your recovery.”

“I was thinking on the way here about how messed up my view of sex is. I’ve never had sex with someone I loved, and often the sex hurt me. You I love, and I know deep down you won’t hurt me. I need to replace the nightmare with the dream, love. I need you to claim me, make me yours. Mate me, big boy.”

His eyes lit up and a huge smile spread on his face. “I love you, Tania. I’ll make this good for you, just tell me if it is too much and I need to stop. I won’t be mad.” He wrapped his arms around me and kissed me, our tongues exploring each other as his hands moved over me. I wrapped my legs around his waist, my sex rubbing against his hard cock beneath me. I moaned in pleasure as I rubbed him. “So beautiful,” he said as he started kissing down my neck to his mark.

He laid me back, holding my wrists in one hand over my head as his other explored my body. I moaned loudly as his mouth sucked on a nipple then gently bit it. It was like an electric shock went down my body to my sex, which was opening and preparing for him. He moved his fingers through my lips, spreading the juices around. I was building quickly, and when he hooked two fingers and found that spot on the top I broke. “BOBBYYYYYYYY!”

He kept his fingers going until I squirted my release onto his hand. I watched, drunk with pleasure, as he licked his fingers clean. “Delicious,” he said.

“Take me, baby. I need your cock in me,” I told him.

He moved between my legs, and I brought my knees up and used my legs to pull him in. He was a big guy, and he stretched me so good. “Oh Luna,” I said when he was finally seated fully. He stopped, thinking I was hurt. “Move, baby. I’m no blushing virgin here, I want you to take me like a mate should.”

He pulled back and plunged forward again, driving the air out of me as his hips met mine. “Oh fuck that’s good,” I said as he kept doing it. Soon my legs were over his shoulders and he was stroking that glorious cock into me, driving me to a powerful orgasm.

He wasn’t done. Pulling out, he rolled me to my stomach and lifted my hips up until I was on my knees. He plunged in deeper, the position allowing him to reach new places inside me. It felt wonderful, and I told him and anyone within a mile just how good it was as I screamed out my pleasure with each orgasm he gave me.

He grabbed my shoulders and pulled me back until I was on my hands and knees. He started taking me even faster, pounding me harder than I’d ever been taken. “Tania… I’m close.”

“MATE ME BOBBY I NEED YOU TO BITE ME,” I screamed. I could feel him partially shifting, some fur coming out, then his knot formed and shoved inside me with a hard thrust. It felt like he’d shoved his fist in there, but the pain was quickly replaced by pleasure as it started stroking my channel. Every time he backed out, it rubbed on my G-spot. “FUCK I’M CUMMING…”

He pushed forward and I felt him start to pulse as he filled me with his seed. He held me still, his bite on my shoulder keeping me from dropping to the ground. It was all too much, and I screamed until the blackness took me.

I woke up, on my side, his big cock still locked inside me with the knot. “Welcome back,” Bobby said. “You all right?”

“Wonderful,” I said. I felt different; something was pushing forward in the back of my head. I moved, which felt amazing, and soon I had him on his back and was riding him to more orgasms. This time, when he came, I felt something in the back of my head push forward and I bit down on his shoulder as we both came.

“That was freaking amazing,” I thought to myself.

“You’re amazing, love.”

I looked down at him, I hadn’t said anything. “Bobby?”

“We’ve got a mate bond, love!” I found it in my mind and opened it wide, feeling his love for me and his emotions over it. I started to cry, I couldn’t stop. He just rubbed my back and comforted me with words and bond. I was still sobbing in relief when his knot softened and we came apart, flooding his legs and the blanket with our shared juices. “You are my mate, you should have the Pack bond. Do you want to try?”

I nodded. Closing my eyes, I looked in my mind and found links there. Two were brighter than the others, not as bright or thick as Bobby’s link, but obviously the Alphas. “Brent? Patty?”

“Welcome to the Pack, Tania. We’re so happy for you!”

“Did my boy treat you right in the mating,” Patty asked.

“He was wonderful. He is wonderful, and I love him so much,” I said.

“Take your time, we’ll take care of Phillip,” Brent said. ”Even better, why don’t you tell Phillip? You should have the family bond with him since he isn’t officially Pack yet.”

I closed the connection and looked in my mind again, finding the one to my boy and opening it up. “Phillip? It’s Mommy. What are you doing?”

“We’re swimming, Mommy. They have a waterslide that’s SOOOO cool!”

“Have fun, baby. Daddy and I will be back this afternoon.”

“Okay, bye.” I was crying, but he was treating it like it was normal. I realized that it was, for him. I was the one who wasn’t like the other, not until now.

We swam again, cleaning ourselves and packing up our stuff for the walk out. “When do you think I will shift,” I asked him as we walked through the gate.

“I’m not sure,” he said. “Changed mates normally shift on the first full moon, that’s in a week. You were a wolf before, maybe that will make a difference. How do you feel?”

“I feel like a happily mated woman,” I said as I squeezed his hand. “I never knew it could be that good. I have a lot of memories to replace, you may have to do that a few more times.” He gave me a grin. “Today.” He grinned more. “Before dinner.”

“Baby, Please! I am NOT from Havana!” We both cracked up, he did a perfect Cleavon Little voice. I loved Blazing Saddles when we watched it together on his iPad on the plane down.

The itching in my body got worse, and I was uncomfortable and rubbing my arms by the time we got to the truck. “What’s going on?”

I could feel my wolf, she was coming out. “My wolf,” I said. I quickly pulled off the clothes and dropped to my hands and knees just before the first bone cracked. It hurt, the pain growing as my body struggled to keep up with my wolf’s nature. It felt like an hour, but was more like a minute before it was over.

“You’re beautiful,” Bobby said. He pushed what he was seeing to me through our bond; my wolf was the same straw-blonde and white wolf from before, but she was taller and lankier now. You could see her ribs more than was healthy, but this was me, MY wolf. “Welcome back, I missed you,” I said in my mind as our souls fused together again. She licked my face, her tail wagging back and forth as we hugged.

I let her have control, she deserved it after all this time. Dropping our front end down, we barked and held our tail high. “She wants to play,” I told Bobby.

He shifted into his wolf and sniffed her, licking her face, then rubbing along her side and licking and smelling her sex. My wolf was giddy with her mate, he was strong and would be a good father and protector for our pups. “Pups? I haven’t gone into heat,” I told them both.

“Humans don’t have heats, they have periods, and you aren’t on birth control anymore,” Bobby said. “Your birth control implant was removed when you were brought to New Orleans, according to Talia.”

“You mean I… we…”

“We will see. It is the fertile part of your cycle, but with the change I don’t know if it will work. We can always practice. I did MY part to make it work, though.”

I butted him with my head. “Yeah, your part is really long and hard. Catch me and maybe you can try again.” I bounded off into the woods, leaping over downed trees and running hard. I was exhilarated, I was loved, and I had my wolf back.

I didn’t even mind when Bobby caught me for more practice.