17|| Grave mistake

Tears fell on my cheek as I was scared, scared as hell.

Tears blurred my vision, I could only see them circling around me and whistling. Looking at me with the dirtiest of intentions.

Why did I ever run away?

They started singing cheap songs. Songs that would translate to "Let's reach the height of shamelessness tonight". I was disgusted.

Oh Allah, save me!

{ AMIR'S POV }

My eyes wide opened as it kept searching for Alizeh. She wasn't there.

I got up from the bed, still feeling sick, and searched around for Alizeh. She was not in the house. Where did she go?

Should I go after her? Actually, leave it, I can't keep her trapped here anymore. She must have ran away when I was asleep.

I went to my room and started watching tv. Nothing on tv was interesting.

Like always you could see the typical saas-bahu (Mother-in-law & Daughter-in-law) cliché melodrama the moment you would turn on an indian channel. These stupid dramas went on for years, by years I mean over eight years for no reason. They just kept repeating the same thing again and again.

I changed it to a channel that would show the latest songs. I wanted to freshen up my mind and stop thinking about her.

Oh God, the songs were terrible. Every song was either an item song where the girl would dance shamelessly or a party song with a pool or beach party. They also made new versions of really old songs. It was funny how the songs I grew up listening to were now being modernized into new versions.

Nothing, absolutely nothing on tv could distract my mind from Alizeh. I was feeling restless without her.

But, I still decided to ignore it and watch tv. Only if I knew how much, how much I would regret this decision.

I went to the bathroom to take a shower. Showers meant deep thoughts, there was no escape to not thinking about Alizeh now.

As I felt the warm water touch my skin, I started thinking of the huge mistake I made by trapping Alizeh for over eleven months.

Why did I keep her when I knew I wouldn't be able to kill her?

Why did I waste eleven months of her life?

Why did I end up falling in love with her when I know she can never be mine?

Maybe it was my obsession for Alizeh, that made me keep her here for over eleven months.

Maybe, I just wanted her to be with me even if it was not possible.

I could feel a burning like feeling develop at the pit of my stomach.

I turned the shower off, as I wrapped myself up in a towel.

I wore a black robe and then dried my dirty blonde hair.

I looked at the mirror. I could see the reflection of a loser. A so called billionaire. A so called Amir Mirza. I could see the Amir who fell in love. The Amir Mirza, who changed from being arrogant and cruel to a soft hearted Amir, in just eleven months. The Amir who failed in both worlds. The world of the self centered Amir Mirza and the world of the wooed by Alizeh; Amir.

I made such a mess for which both of us will be suffering. I don't think I can ever forget Alizeh. I am so sorry for everything.

I could feel tears falling down. Was this even real? I was crying?

I changed into a black t-shirt and jeans. I finished drying my hair and then went outside the washroom.

I realized I never turned the tv off, so I got the remote.

As soon as I was about to turn it off, I realized it was on a news channel. The headlines said "Girl raped by gang of five in Lucknow central train station". The girl was beaten to death when she tried to escape, as they showed a picture of hers.

What a world we live in! Five men raped and killed a girl? Disgusting!

I realized I would do the same thing to Alizeh without sexually assaulting her. I was about to kill her.

Suddenly, something flashed into my head.

Flashback

"Oi Chikni Kamar (thin waist), dance more na please"

"Look your hero has come!"

"Oi oi!What romace"

*Whistling sounds*

"You could just run away, the door was opened. Why didn't you?"

"Because I don't know anyone here, this is India. The environment is not safe here, especially for a girl. Plus, I can't just run away to Dubai! I am more safe here than outside"

End of flashback

SHIT SHIT SHIT!!!

I realized what a grave mistake I had committed by falling asleep, letting her go and not going after her.

Alizeh is also outside the house, the men here... ugh ugh... she is a girl... Fuck!

I went outside, with a picture of Alizeh, searching for her.

Oh Allah, please don't make her suffer for the mistake I committed!

Why did I realize all of this now?

Let's just hope nothing happens to Alizeh 😨 And also eleven months hint hint 😉