Fifty-Three

We walked out of the office after I had calmed and my face was no longer red. I walked up to my mom and pulled her aside, "You know this is excruciatingly painful right?"

"Yes Blake-"

"I'm not trying to stop you," I paused and looked at her, "I just want to know why."

"I trust your-"

"Don't feed me a line of bullshit. I know you trust me, but why are you doing this? All of this?"

She looked down, "Blake your father-" She quit and I hugged her.

"Please mom. I just want a reason."

She looked up with a tear, "I want fated mates back. Your grandparents were so... in love. You and Caden are so in love. And now that you're having kids..." She looked up with a smile, "I want to do anything I can to help them have fated mates. I want them all to have what you have. I messed up, I didn't have it, I'll probably never have it. But if this helps everyone in the pack watch their children get it... the pain is nothing. If I could see Dana and Benjamin have fated mates like you have..." she trailed off.

I hugged her again, "I always dreamed of this day."

She nodded and a faint smile crossed her lips, "Do you remember the first time Grandpa told you about fated mates?"

I thought back but nothing specific came to mind so I shook my head.

"You ran into the kitchen and had tears streaming down your face. You hugged my legs and just kept crying. I asked what was wrong but you didn't say anything. I put you down for a nap since I assumed you were just tired... The next day you asked about your father and I. You asked if we were "mates by fate" and I had just shaken my head confused. You looked so sad and asked if you would ever have a fated mate. When I said no you stormed upstairs and said you would never even look at a guy unless he was 'fatedly yours', as you said it. I remember I laughed because I thought you were just making a big deal of nothing." She paused and I slowly remembered it faintly, but not the whole memory.

I looked up to her and she smiled again.

"You lived by your words even if you don't remember saying them. You never dated, never even hung out with guys. I never thought about it until you talked about Caden and being fated mates. I know this has always been your dream," she paused, "Blake I could not be happier that you have a shot at your dream coming true. The one good thing you got from your father is your drive, and this could change all of our lives." She brushed my hair back, "I'm so proud of you."

I hugged her, "I'm proud of you too."

Her number came up and Jess and Dana came over. I soon left and Caden rushed up to me, "You're crying. What happened? What's wrong? Who-"

"Caden-"

He continued his onslaught of questions before I put a finger over his mouth. He stopped and looked over my face. I opened up my mind to him and the memory from my conversation with my mom and he held me close, "We're all proud of you Bee."

"I know it's hormones making me cry but I think that was the most motherly thing I've ever heard from her." I paused, "What if I let her down?"

"You've got this far. This is enough for her to always be proud of you, everything from here is a bonus."

I pecked his cheek and he wiped my tears, "I should let you get back to them. I'm going to start circulating."

He held me close and placed his lips chastely to my forehead. I smiled against his chest, "Dinner babe. I'm holding you to that."

I smiled and nodded, "Of course sexy."

------

For the last two hours I comforted families and watched loved ones weep as their relative walked through the doors to the hospital room, blocking their mates, hugging their families.

It was overbearing, especially with the hormones. I haven't needed to cry so much in my life before. I've been holding back my tears for two hours hoping some strength would comfort others.

Mom hadn't come out yet, should be in the next few hours though, it takes roughly four and a half. The nurses and doctors were working straight through the night, taking a four nap and starting again for their next twelve hour shift. Caden said to take seven or eight hours but they all agreed they would catch up afterwards. They were working shifts so that it was constant, and doctors were on at all times; constantly taking patients.

I glanced at my watch to see it was almost noon. I went to the kitchen and made some snacks with the help of a few older women. We put them throughout the lounge rooms and I began circulating again. My feet were getting sore, swollen and overly hot. But the pain was way smaller than what the volunteers were going through so I refused to stop.

The mother from yesterday was in the smallest lounge room with her son and daughter and I crouched next to them, "Is your dad in there?"

They all nodded before the mother spoke up, "Three hours ago."

"So he should be out soon. Don't worry. He's strong."

"Nobody has come out yet."

"It takes four and a half hours give or take. The first person went in only four hours ago. Don't worry, everything is going fine or they wouldn't be taking more volunteers."

She nodded and the boy stood up, "I'm not scheduled for two hours."

"If your dad comes out healthy."

"He will. He said the doctors have never disappointed him."

I smiled, the love between a boy and his father was like no other, "Then convince your mom."

She looked to me, "I've never felt so empty. He's never blocked me before."

"I promise he's alright. Caden would've told me otherwise. He told me half hour ago that nobody had passed."

She nodded.

"The doctors don't see any troubles. You're mate is perfectly okay."

"He's in pain," the little boy said, "A lot of pain."

"Yes. He is." I said quietly, "You don't have to do this if-"

"I am."

His mother had one tear trail down her cheek, "He's risking his life for them. He wants them to have fated mates. He wants them to be endlessly loved because he doesn't want them to feel alone when we die."

I nodded and she started talking to me via the link.

He cried last night Luna. I've never seen a male wolf cry unless their mate has died. It killed me. I-I didn't even know what to do. I just laid with him and soon we were crying together. He didn't want the kids to see.

I nodded. I wrapped my arms around her, He wants to be that father you can all rely on. The strong man who doesn't cry. He's your anchor, all three of yours.

He tried to hide it but I heard him. I walked in and rushed over, terrified something was wrong.

I pulled away and she brought her kids closer, "He'll be out before you know it."

And then my son goes in and we do it all over again.

He still has time to change his mind. Or we'll already have an accurate sampling and he won't need to.

He won't change his mind.

He's the strongest little boy I've met. Don't doubt either of them.

She nodded and kissed both of them on the forehead, "I love you two. I love you so much."

I walked away as they got talking and started to move around again.

------

Four hours and twenty-three minutes.

The time since the first volunteer went in.

I went to the kitchen and brought out more snacks.

The first volunteer, Vince Freul, would be done any moment now. If he didn't make it, the next families would be in more grief knowing that so far 1/3 had not made it, but if he did live than 3/3 made it. The latter was better odds.

And a pack member had survived. Which was a better benefit.

It had been almost four and a half hours as I made my way over to the door. This side had so much emotional pain I couldn't even comprehend it all. The other side was filled with physical pain- unequalled physical pain.

I almost cried again thinking of my role in causing both sides of the door the amount of pain they were in. The lounge rooms were at the highest tension possible as everyone waited on the first volunteer.

I was just about to walk through when Caden's scent hit me. I held back my tears but I knew I looked like I was feeling- on the brink of breaking down. These hormones were not helping in the slightest.

Caden walked out and brought me into his chest before clearing his throat, catching everyone's attention instantly.

I went to pull away as he started speaking but he held me tighter and started anyways, "We are privileged to call this pack our own, Blake and I. We asked you to go through, or wait as a relative goes through, extreme amounts of pain, just based on our word. I cannot put into words what we feel. We cannot thank you enough. Nor can we voice our appreciation for Vince Freul who was the first to go through this experiment." Claps went around but soon died down, "However, just minutes ago when he woke up healthy I tried my best." Everyone listening cheered. Everyone except his family who froze before crying with joy. A tear ran down my face as I watched them. Mrs. Freul, his mate, doubled over in joy, hugging their children tightly. Caden let the pack celebrate the life and hugged me tighter.

Silence. He commanded gently, and silence followed.

"The family of Vince is more than welcome to see him, he is in the waiting room, completely healthy." The family quickly scurried over but stopped at us.

His mate hugged me, "Thank you earlier for the-"

"No no no no." I hushed her, "Thank you for supporting him and us. Go see him, I'm sure he wants nothing but."

She smiled to me before one last hug and she rushed out. Another tear fell and I wiped them all away.

"Nobody has any conflict so far and the doctor's do not see any on the horizon, but if so, you will all be made aware. Thank you." Caden finished and everyone made their way back to a lounge room.

I looked to the door wondering if mom was okay before I turned to go to the families once again, "I'll let you go, bye Caden-"

He kissed my lips before holding me tight, "You should nap Bee, you look exhausted. I'm worried."

"I'll catch some sleep later Caden." Once all the volunteers' families knew whether they were celebrating a life or mourning one.

"Have you eaten?"

"I've had some of the snacks I put out throughout the day." Which was true.

"Something solid?"

"I'm not hungry."

"Bee-"

"Caden. Please. Not now?"

"Blake you're carrying two pups, you should be eating and sleeping and-"

"Caden I would never put the pups at risk. You know that."

"I'm sorry Bee." He hugged me, "I'm just worried."

"I know you are."

He hugged me, "How are the families?"

"Staying strong so far. The good news helped. It's not so tense."

He pecked my forehead, "We're still on for dinner right?"

"Yeah sexy. How is it on your side of the door?"

He seemed to really think of how to word it, "Experimentally it's going well."

I nodded before looking down, "Did you see my mom?"

He nodded slowly, "I stayed with her until..."

"Until what?" I pushed?

"Bee-"

"Caden don't lessen the blow. Until what?"

"Until she passed out."

"How bad was the pain?"

"She screamed for about forty minutes before she passed out. Like many. Few stay awake the whole time. She's perfectly fine, I keep checking, but she hasn't woken up."

I nodded, "I'll see you for dinner." I turned to leave. Mom went through all of that just so that my pups could have fated mates? Everyone was going through it all for a chance at the next generation having fate guide them?

Caden brought me back to reality, "Blake-"

"I just... I should be with the families."

"Bee. You are in the same position as them. You need some comforting too."

"I'll talk to Dana and Jess-"

He stopped me by carrying me to a close empty room. I held back my tears thinking of the pain mom went through, the pain everyone is going to go through, simply because we asked.

"Caden we should be-"

"Shh. Just let me hold you." He brought me against him and rubbed my back slowly. "Just relax. You've been so strong for everyone, take a minute for yourself."

I shook my head but he just kept holding me. Soon I was crying quietly into his shirt.

"You're not alone Bee. I'm always here for you."

"Caden they're all suffering simply because we asked them to."

"I know Bee."

"What can we do for them?"

"You're doing all you can today, but you mean afterwards don't you?"

I nodded, "What can we do for them as a thank you?"

He kept rubbing my back silently, "I don't know Bee, I'll keep it in mind."

"Thank you Caden."

He kissed the top of my head, "Are you sure you're ready to go back?"

I nodded.

"Dinner?"

"Yes Caden. We'll have dinner. Should I come find you or?"

"I'll find you." He didn't want me passed the door.

"Okay. We should get back."

He tilted my face up and his eyes ran over my face slowly, "After this is over you're not leaving bed for days."

"Caden-"

"I know, I know, I'll let you get back."

"I was going to say you had to join me in bed for those days, but okay-"

His lips stopped me as his tongue invaded my mouth. I wrapped my legs around him as he picked me up. Next thing I knew my back hit something hard as my hands ran through his hair.

He pulled away as I took in gulps of air and his lips trailed down my neck. He nibbled my collarbone as I moaned and he growled back.

"Caden!" I gasped as his lips attached to my neck. I would definitely have a hickey.

He nuzzled my neck and kissed my mark. I tucked my face into his neck, "I miss you Bee."

"Me too Caden. I miss you too."

He placed his forehead on mine and I slowly opened my eyes. I looked down, laughed and he gave me a confused look.

"Our pups made this awkward." My belly separating us from our usual position.

"I'm sure it won't be the first time."

I laughed and nodded before we went to our separate ways.

------

Fifty-three hours.

I have not slept in fifty-three hours. I was starting to yawn at least twenty hours ago. Caden and I had had dinner twice now. Being more than two days. All those done the experiment were home and recovering with their families. We had extra guards on rotation since the pack was in a weakened state due to how many males had undergone the procedure.

There were twelve people yet to come out, no more than five hours left. The doctor's were starting to catch up on sleep as their last patients left.

After one hundred and fifty volunteers went, Caden, Ben, Daniel, the doctors and I decided that the sampling was plenty big enough and had told everyone they did not need to volunteer any longer, however, nobody had given up.not a single volunteer left, everyone who gave their word when we started continued with the experiment.

Within the first hundred and fifty people, three had died. I had such tremendous guilt for each of them. I had told the families and let them greive. Two families took it fairly well considering I had asked them to. One family had yelled at me for almost twenty minutes, blaming me for their loss.

After a couple hours went by the volunteers mate had come back to apologize but I didn't let her. It was my fault after all. I had asked them to volunteer. She insisted, but I hugged her, comforted her as best I could, and helped them all home.

I still can't get the guilt off my chest.

The three had one thing in common. They all had sickle cell anemia. The doctors described it as having odd shaped blood cells. Apparently it is common in werewolves, I didn't understand the biology lessen behind that one, too high above my science level, but after that they tested he volunteers for the condition before continuing. Four were sent home due to the condition, without doing the experiment.

I walked into the second lounge room, "Your mate is waiting for you." I said to the last family in this room, "Healthy as can be."

They all hugged me before rushing out to the clinic. I smiled and looked down, the pups were getting restless.

Five hours, I reminded myself. I made it this far.

I grabbed a yogurt and coffee and sat in the lounge chair. But then I heard the door and put my snack down before going to the clinic. Another volunteer made it.

I was overjoyed every time it happened as if it was the first all over again.

------

All three hundred and forty-two volunteers, not including the four sent home, were done. It had taken an hour longer than I thought.

I put the list of the names of those three volunteers who died due to their sickle cell anemic condition in the office and started cleaning up the lounge rooms.

I felt a tear roll down my cheek as I picked up the little boy from the wheelchairs hat. I would have to return it to his mother.

I put it in the office as well and continued to clean.

I had just finished and was going to start the dishes when an all-too-familiar-voice sounded behind me.

"Cupcake!"

I turned with a smile, "Hey Daniel."

"How's my soon-to-be-married-to-an-ass friend doing?"

I laughed, "Just tired."

"I'm surprised he didn't drag you to bed once this ended."

"I'm kind of shocked too."

"Where is he?"

"Haven't seen him in hours. Not since dinner... whenever that was."

"Blake have you slept since this started?"

I shook my head, "But-"

"No buts. That's not good for my niblings."

"Nibings?"

"Non gender word referring to neice or nephew."

"No way-"

"Even Sammy googled it."

I laughed, "Okay Daniel. Where is Sam?"

"Laying in my bed waiting for me to-"

"I don't want to hear it!" I cut him off.

He laughed, "Bring her food."

"Oh okay. I thought if you're anything like your brother I knew where that was going."

"I have a little decency. Plus, she promised me that came after." He winked and I shooed him out of the kitchen.

He left laughing.

I leaned against the counter and rubbed my eyes. I was exhausted.

I decided to let the dishes wait until after I had at least eight hours of sleep and started on my way up the stairs.

Half way to the top Caden came jogging down, "There you are baby. I've been looking for you."

"I figured I would clean up the lounge rooms before catching some shut eye."

He picked me up and I fell into him, cuddling closer, "You should change first babe. Then you can sleep without having to wake up again."

I nodded and expected him to put me down in the closet but he sat me on the bed and started to strip me. I shook my head but he smiled and nodded.

I was too tired to argue so I just let him do whatever he wanted and was soon in a loose shirt and shorts, "Thanks Caden."

He chuckled and picked me up, "Come on babe. Hold on." He said as he picked me up.

"Caden just lay with me," I said as my eyes started to close.

"Bee... one minute... days... sleep." I caught some of it as I dozed in and out of conciousness.

I just nodded, heard his slight chuckle and curled closer to his chest. He was moving but I had no idea where to, the bed was right here. I missed him though, so I let him hold me. I didn't care where we were going.

------

CADEN'S POV

She had bags under her eyes, red tinges to them as if she had cried or was holding back tears, her hair was in a messy bun, her feet were swollen, her body limp in my arms from exhaustion and her eyes had little life in them for the breif moments I saw them open.

Still beautiful, that would never change, but I should've made sure she slept and ate more. I ahted that I didn't. But her arguing is extremely hard to argue with.

She was well passed tired, but too stubborn to have stopped for a nap in the last two days, no matter how much I persisted. Especially when those volunteers didn't make it.

I know she took it hard. I felt guilty, but Bee felt as if she killed them herself. I was hoping to give her a much needed break from it all for a few days.

I had told the pack to take a few days to themselves to be with their families before I held a meeting for everyone and we discussed our next step, where we were on the fated mate front, and what we would tell council.

Paul already knew and approved of it, but we would have to tell him the result.

But for the next three or four days Bee and I were getting some alone time.

I had packed enough clothes for both of us, they were in my car, since I figured she wouldn't be awake enough to drive. And I had asked one of my late mother's old friends to stock the fridge and cupboards with food before turning on the water.

She had happily obliged and I had thanked her multiple times.

After the forty minute drive, in which Bee had shifted into a position where her head was on my shoulder, I carried her into the house and laid her in the bed.

"C...cad...den." She said exhausted in a sleepy voice.

I hushed her gently before kissing her forehead, "I'll be right back beautiful."

I unpacked the car and changed before climbing in beside her.

She curled up into me and I ran a hand through her hair, "I love you Bee. Sleep tight."

She had a faint smile cross her lips before I passed out too.

******

Hey all you lovely readers!!! Been way too long!!!! I'm hoping doing some from his POV will make you less mad at how long it took!! It's an hour to midnight where I live but I hated to put this off longer than necessary, even if I have to be up at six for work tomorrow!!

Hope you enjoy!!!!!

Sorry again, please don't hate me!!!

Goodnight y'all!!!!

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CoffeeAndABook6

P.S. I'm half asleep so I apologize for the bad editing!!!! I barely edited at all... let me know your thoughts!!