Itâs her voice that I hear firstâthat sweet voice that soothed and consoled me when everything came crashing down.
My feet move, my body drawn to the sound that has the ultimate power over me.
I walk and walk, lulled by the security I find in her soft and melodious tone.
Until I stop.
I see her in the distance. Her body half turned to me, sheâs gazing at me with confusion in her eyes. Her features are swathed in darkness and I can barely make out what she looks like.
But I know her.
I know her heart, and I can see deep into her soul. Thatâs all that matters. Her looks are inconsequential as I know that her inner beauty shines so brightly it has the power to feed me like nothing elseârevitalize me when Iâm halfway to the grave and infuse power in my limbs when my strength leaves me.
A smile plays at her lips as she spots me, and she turnsâslowly.
I donât even think as I start into a sprint, running to her, needing to have the physical confirmation that she is with me and this isnât a mirage.
My body makes contact with hers. Skin against skin as a jolt travels through my body at the divine feeling of being so close to her. As I wrap my arms around her form, feeling her warmth, a content sigh escapes me.
This is heaven.
The scene soon shifts, and before I can blink, I find myself on a bed, naked and looming over her bare skin. My lips skim over the surface of her smooth stomach, laying soft kisses as I trail my way down. Her small whimpers of encouragement are everything I need to make sure Iâm doing everything right.
I dig my fingers into the plush skin of her hips, feeling her soft flesh molding to my digits. Holding tightly onto her, I let my tongue peek out as I lick my initial into her skin, searing my possession of her.
âYouâre mine,â I whisper among peppered kisses, the need to own her growing to an unfulfilled crescendoâmake her mine in a way that no one would dare contest.
âYes,â her breathy voice goes straight to my cock as she urges me lower, her fingers in my hair as she guides me to her core.
Getting hold of her panties, I tug them down, easily slipping them off her legs.
Itâs only when I have her bared before me, her musky scent invading my nostrils, that I have to wonder how Iâve lived so far, my entire life flashing before my eyes and showing me my bleak existence before her.
I lay a chaste kiss to the top of her mound before going lower, parting her lips with my tongue for the first taste of her.
âFuck,â a low groan escapes me. âFucking hell,â I curse as I dive in, lapping at her like a madman.
Her sounds are my guide as I learn her pleasure, the goal of her climax spurring me forward to give it my best.
Itâs only when she comes with my name on her tongue while mine is still filled with the flavor of that I go up for air, gliding up her body and reaching for a kiss.
âRaf,â she whispers as she turns her eyes on meâthose hazel eyes that have no equal in this world.
Her features are brought into focus, a bright new clarity entering my mind as I peruse every inch of her.
âNoelle,â her name is wrenched from my lips as I stare into her more than perfect faceâthat work of art thatâs become right at home haunting my dreams and making me slowly die with unreleased tension.
She has a dreamy look on her face, her entire skin glistening with sweat from the exertion, her beauty only enhanced by the look of pure ecstasy on her face. Sheâs glowing from her pleasure, her eyes hooded as she gazes at me, her fingers threaded through my hair as she caresses me gently.
âCome to me,â she urges and Iâm helpless to deny her.
Iâm helpless to do anything but lean in, my lips on hers in a culmination of loss.
Wounding her arms around my neck, she draws me in an intoxicating embrace, my dick sliding against her wet pussy lips, her moans swallowed by my mouth as I tease her. Her warmth engulfs me, her arousal dripping and coating my entire shaft as she arches her back, shifting her hips to position me at her entrance.
Thereâs only sensation at this pointâpure, unadulterated sensation. I feel her everywhere, my mouth devouring her wholeâ¦
As if reaching for air, I gasp, my eyes snapping open as the previous vision dispels from my mind. Panting, I stare at the ceiling as I squirm against the heavy chains that hold me to my bed, relief pouring out of me at the fact that it had been just a dream.
I havenât dishonored Lucero. I havenât tainted her memory by touching .
I shouldnât want her. I shouldnât want to do anything with her. Yet the more I fight this attraction, the more potent it becomes.
There are no truer words, as evidenced by my current dilemma. I fail to grasp this maddening dichotomyâthe way my body yearns for her, while my mind abhors her. But no journey is entirely smooth, and it seems my own road to vengeance will be pebbled with temptation.
Iâve survived worse though, and if my time in captivity has taught me anything, itâs that thereâs an infinite quality to human will. One that is only discovered through sheer hardship.
Yet the allure of her proximity grows more day by day, only augmented by the fact that she would probably welcome me into her body, her pussy drenched for me to mercilessly shove my cock inside of her in a brutal assault.
Because I wouldnât be gentle with her.
Despite the soft nature of my wet dreamâmuch as it makes my lips purse in frustrationâI know I would be anything but gentle with her.
Iâd take her hard and fast, if only to exorcize her from my mind and my body and the fact that sheâs become close to an elusive obsession.
I grit my teeth as anger slowly seeps in.
Why does my dick have to fucking burst at the thought of her?
The fact that Iâve never had such a visceral reaction to another woman only makes my anger mount, leaving me even more frustrated as my cock strains against the plane of my stomach, so fucking hard and nearly ready to pop.
And as my thoughts continue to stray to her plump lips, visions of her on her knees and choking on my cock invading my mind, I canât help the small tremors that overtake me, my entire body spasming as I thrash against my holds, my dick twitching as spurts of cum land on my stomach.
âFuck, fuck, fuck,â I curse out loud as I manage to free myself from my chains.
Even the euphoria of my orgasm is not enough to chase the clouds that settle over me. Maybe I would be able to thrust this out of my mind if this had been an isolated incident borne out of my drug induced state. But even my clear mind has trouble keeping her out of it.
Sheâs become a restless phantasm in my head. Thoughts of her plague me every waking moment of the day, my skin prickling with anticipation to see her.
In the beginning Iâd told myself it was purely my need to gloat at her misery. But that had soon shifted. And it seems that my dick canât take a fucking clue when it comes to her.
Sure, Iâm still relishing her misery, but with a raging erection every time sheâs in the vicinity.
In a sudden moment of clarity, Iâm forced to accept that her plan to seduce me might have workedâat least on my body. She flaunts herself in front of me so often, showing enough skin to make me intrigued, but barely enough to keep me guessing.
My jaw clenches as I realize I may have fallen into her trap.
Oh, sheâs good. Iâll give her that. Sheâs an experienced seductress and her mix of sophistication and contrived innocence had certainly hooked me, making me desire that duality in her while making me question myself and my initial motives for hating her. Her strategy is nothing short of impressiveâadvance and retreat, coming across as hot and cold until she sinks her claws into me.
And sunk them she has.
The anger becomes even more potent as I realize Iâm likely not the first man sheâs used those wiles of hers on. After all, she must have perfected her seduction technique somehow. And awakens something scary inside of me.
âDamn it all to hell,â I mutter as cold water from the shower pours down on meâall in an attempt to squash this uncharacteristic and insane thirst I feel for her.
In a moment of weakness, Iâm left to wonder if I should maybe just give inâfuck her once and get her out of my system. At least then I wonât be so curious about her flavor, the feel of her pussy wrapped around me, or the taste of her full submission as I fuck the brat out of her. Maybe that could work.
But I know I would ultimately never forgive myself for being so weak as to fall prey to her charms. And that annoys me even more.
Because Iâll be damned if I do and Iâll be damned if I donât.
âYouâre scowling,â Carlos notes hours later. Freshly showered and dressed, the hallucination has continued to bother me throughout the day, the simulated realism of it only making me yearn for the real thing more.
And is a problem.
I canât act on this irrational desire. To do so would be a betrayal to myself, and most of all a betrayal to Lucero.
How could I contemplate touching the person whoâd made her life miserable with the same gentleness I should have touched ? How could I even fathom engaging in the act of ultimate intimacy with someone so contemptible? With someone for whom I only feel distasteâraw anger that consumes me from the inside and threatens to erupt to the surface.
Already, I feel myself getting increasingly unsettled at the thought of Noelle, so I attempt to shove it out of my mind.
âItâs nothing,â I mumble under my breath, not in the mood to broach the subject with Carlos.
âI donât think it is,â he tsks at me, leaning back and watching me closely. âYouâve been with DeVille for almost two months now. Granted, weâve made some progress with the weapons and the market has welcomed us with open arms. But other than that?â He shakes his head. âYouâre supposed to focus on your brother, not get married.â
âHeâs been MIA for weeks. If anything, Iâd say heâs scared,â I chuckle. âHe must have heard Iâve joined hands with DeVille and is expecting the worst,â I deflect.
âThat doesnât explain why youâve become so fixated on that girl. I get that you want to get revenge for what happened at the , but is this really the right way? Marrying her?â He scoffs at me.
âCarlos is right. Itâs a bit too drastic, wouldnât you say?â Anita chimes in, carrying a bowl of cereal with her.
âNot you too,â I groan.
Itâs not the first time that Carlos has questioned me on my plans with Noelle. Now to have Anita tooâ¦
âI have it all under control,â I roll my eyes at her.
âI donât think you do,â Carlos shoots back, openly challenging me. âEver since youâve met her, youâve virtually put your plan with Michele on a black-burn.â
âThatâs not true,â I protest.
âYes it is. Youâre practically obsessed with the girl. Every time I see you, itâs always the same thing.
Anita jokes as she repeats my words from before. â
she laughs. âSeriously, Raf, you havenât talked about anything else her.â
âWell, itâs an ongoing plan,â I mumble, peeved at being put on the spot.
âNo. The ongoing plan is to end your brother and Ortega. And in the process get rid of the bounties on our heads,â Carlos adds drily.
âThis was an add-on.â
I should have expected they wouldnât understand what this means to meâthe chance to pay her back for everything.
Maybe I a little obsessed, but thatâs only because sheâs the only remaining link to the past that I have. One that I need to firmly exorcize from my lifeâand to a satisfying degreeâbefore I can move on.
Yes, Michele is my primary focus. But Noelleâs sudden reappearance in my life has been nothing short of fortuitous. Iâm not about to throw away the chance of a lifetime.
âAn add-on that took over your whole focus.â
âItâs only until I become her legal guardian,â I bring my fingers to my temples, massaging them. âAfter that, Iâll make sure sheâs committed, and she wonât bother us again.â
âUhum, if you say so,â Anita chuckles, and Carlos shakes his head at me.
âAre you sure itâs not somethingâ¦more?â he asks tentatively.
âSomething more?â I frown.
âThat this you have going on isnât just an excuse.â
âI donât know what youâre talking about.â
âSheâs a very beautiful woman, Raf,â Carlos notes, and that one sentence has me curling my hands into fists. My gaze cold, I narrow my eyes at him.
âI didnât realize you were checking her out,â I add sarcastically.
âAnd is my cue to remove myself from this situation,â Anita declares in a sing-song voice. âI feel bad for you,â she turns to me before leaving, giving me a pitiful look. âPoor, poor thing,â she shakes her head, the corners of her mouth quirking up.
Watching her retreating figure, I blink in confusion.
Carlos, too, is sporting an amused look on his face, and it seems that everyone is in on a hidden joke.
âWhat was that all about?â I frown.
âRaf,â Carlos starts in that fatherly tone of his. âThe fact that you donât understand is the issue.â A smile pulls at his lips. âFine,â he nods as he pats me on the back. âGo ahead with your revenge and marry the girl. Iâm sure the plan will work wonderfully.â
âIt will,â I reply with conviction. âIâll own her and Iâll be able to do whatever I want with her.â
His features twitch with amusement.
âIndeed,â he chuckles.
Heâs about to say something else when Panchito bursts through the room, a tablet in his hand and a broad smile on his face.
âI got it!â He yells enthusiastically.
âYou got what?â
âMichele. I managed to find some traces of him.â He says and my focus shifts immediately.
âGo on,â I nod at him.
âHeâs been smart about covering his traces. I donât know if he goes out much besides this butâ¦â
âGet to the point, Panchito,â I tell him impatiently.
âThese were taken at a few private recitals over the last month. I came across one by coincidence, and I couldnât help but notice this,â he points to a figure in the back corner.
Heâs dressed in a black tux, a glass of champagne in his hand as heâs gazing attentively at the stage. His face is a little blurry given that heâs in the back of the room.
âSince you gave me a profile of Michele, I thought Iâd try some underground art auctions or musical events, since,â he pauses, turning to me, âyou mentioned he showed some artistic inclination in his youth.â
âHe did,â I nod. âHe was always in his own world, often drawing or listening to recordings of classical concerts. Our father never approved of either, since he deemed them unmanly,â I purse my lips, since that rule had applied to me too.
I refrain from mentioning that his interest in classical music may have started because of my mother. Since young, she would always play for me, the act giving her joy. But sheâd never let Michele take part in our little tete-a-tete. In my motherâs words, heâd been an interloper. He would, however, find ways to listen to her play. Although curiosity had been piqued in the beginning because heâd been banned from it, it had later turned into a full-on hobby.
But that had been a lifetime ago and during a period where Iâd felt something akin to pity for Michele. After all, he had been ostracized by his own family. Still, nothing excuses what he turned into.
âI didnât know for sure if this is him, but I ran some simulations and everything from stature to body language matches. Iâm pretty positive it was him.â
âGood job,â I say appreciatively, my eyes still on the picture.
âThis was last month. But this,â he swipes his finger on the screen, âis from last week,â he pulls up another picture.
This one is more clear, and I can see my brotherâs features better. He hasnât changedânot much anyway. Thereâs still a glaring emptiness in his eyes, as if heâs truly soulless.
âSo heâs been attending private events,â Carlos notes. âItâs not much, but itâs something.â
âNo,â my lips pull up in a twisted smile. âItâs everything, because I have an inkling of a plan,â I say as I start explaining my idea.
Who said I couldnât shoot two birds with one stone?
âIâm not sure what you want me to say, Raf,â Cisco raises a brow as he leans in his chair. âYour plan is sound, and I appreciate all the details youâve outlined,â he slaps the document Iâd brought on the table. âBut this is my sister weâre talking about.â
âAnd this is my brother,â I counter. âWeâve been tracking his movements for a long time already, and youâve seen how rare his public appearances are. For Fuckâs sake, he has a body double that he sends out to distract people.â
âIndeed, your brother has a strange case of paranoia. I wonât deny that. But what if my sister gets hurt?â
I donât for one second think that Cisco truly cares about his sister getting hurt. After all, if he did, he wouldnât have given her to me.
No, this isnât about that.
He wants to ascertain my intentions and to play the devilâs advocate.
âShe wonât. Iâll personally see that she wonât,â I give him my charming smile.
âThen Iâll trust you on this,â he smirks. âEspecially with how thorough youâve been,â he whistles. âI must say that Iâm impressed.â
âThe proper channels have already been informed, and Iâve set an alias for her and a fake biography. Anyone looking her up on the internet would find only vague information thatâs bound to make Michele even more interested.â
âYouâre sure heâll bite?â Cisco inquires. âItâs just that your brother doesnât come across asâ¦a man of culture. A psychotic mess of paranoia and misplaced grandiosity, yes. But a cultured man?â He shakes his head.
âHeâs always been passionate about the beaux arts. But he was never allowed to show an interest when my parents lived. Even now, as you can see, everything he does is covertly. My IT guy also managed to trace some art transactions to him. Itâs not something he advertises, which suggests it means a lot to him.â
âYour brother would be an interesting man,â Cisco notes, âif not for being the enemy.â
âYou know, there was a time I felt sorry for him. I know what he had to go through and why he is the way he is.â
Cisco looks at me expectantly, but I donât expand on that.
âThere was a time I thought he could be saved. But not anymore. He made his choices. And now I make mine.â
âIndeed,â he nods, lighting a cigarette. âBesides, youâre infinitely easier to work with,â he gives me a wolfish smile, implying that in the scheme of things, he wouldnât really care which side heâd be onâmine or Micheleâs. But only one of us is willing to give him what he wants, and is the deciding factor.
Most of the time I donât know whether to admire Cisco or revile him for the way he does business. One thing is for sure, though. Heâs not someone youâd want as your enemy.
âThen itâs settled. Iâll have Panchito set everything up digitally. I will only need your help in finding a venue and inviting other influential people to throw Michele off our scent.â
âDonât worry. Iâll do that. Now on how to convince Noelleâ¦â
We spend the entire afternoon planning, and as we discuss the various ways in which weâd get Noelle to agree to the plan, I canât help but feel a sliver of guilt.
Iâd sketched out the plan in a moment of anger and Iâd been more than convinced that this would be the way to get rid of both thorns in my side.
But is it truly right?
Subjecting Noelle to my brother might just be the worst type of punishment I could ever think for her.
As the hour grows late, I realize I canât sleep, these thoughts plaguing me, doubts entering my mind when I should be nothing but secure in my goal.
So my feet take me to her room, surreptitiously opening the door to find her fast asleep.
Propping myself on a nearby chair, I bring my hand to my chin as I simply study her.
She looks so innocent in her sleep, huddled between those silky sheets. Her hair is draped over her bare shoulders, her nightgown a light piece of fabric that doesnât leave much to the imagination.
But as much as I look at her, trying to decipher my lingering obsession with her, I canât.
Carlos was right.
Regardless of my grudge against her for her role in my misfortunes at the , I should have never reacted this strongly to her. After all, sheâs just one of on my list of tormentors.
Yet something is different.
Instead of focusing on my brother, whoâs been the bane of my existence for so long, Iâve funneled all my attention into Someone who, in the grand scheme of things, isnât even that important.
Yet itâs someone I canât seem to stop thinking about.
Why am I obsessing over her day and night?
The decision to kill her should be a simple one, my mission notwithstanding. Yet the thought of her , of her lips turning purple and her face losing its vitality unnerves me. Something inside of me is stopping me from fully hating her and I cannot comprehend what.
I have the facts. I what I witnessed and endured just as I know what Lucero told me. At the same time, things donât add up.
I may have known her only for a brief period of time, but she doesnât come across as a conniving bitch. If anything, thereâs an artless innocence about her, a vulnerability that makes me ache with want.
She makes me want to hug her and gut her at the same time, and thatâs my conundrum.
She moves, her sheet sliding down her abdomen, her tits in full view through the flimsy material of her gown. Full and a size too big for her small frame, they are enough to lead a saint to sin. Certainly enough for me to fantasize about them.
At once, a wave of lust hits me as my eyes zero in on her erect nipples, the pink of her areola such a delectable shade, made for licking, sucking and biting.
A silent groan escapes me as I feel all the blood rush to my cock at the thought of her tits in my mouth, and my tongue on her flesh as I bring her to the edge only to leave her unfulfilledâthe only thing the little tease deserves.
I swallow hard, the taste of her on my tongue palpable.
Sweet. Sheâd taste so sweet. Of that I have no doubt.
It doesnât matter that sheâs a facetious bitch.
At this moment, all that matters is how my mind perceives her. Iâm like a drunk man as I let my eyes feast on her, drinking her in until my imagination can get to work and fill in the gaps.
A throaty sound escapes her and I palm my cock through my pants, that one sound my undoing.
Itâs madness. Thereâs no other way to describe my addled brain. Because no one in their right mind would lust so hard after the person theyâre supposed to hateâthat they .
But I canât stop myself.
Iâm like a fucking slave to my baser instincts.
All my life Iâve seen men be led around by their cocks and Iâd taken pride in being differentâin leading a life of moderation.
But when I look at her, thereâs no moderation, just pure hedonistic abandon as I want nothing more than to sink into her warm depths.
My errant hand lowers the zipper of my pants and I take my cock out, stroking myself from base to tip at the sight of her luscious body and the wonders it contains. Her sweet pussy calls to me, and as I close my eyes, her scent and taste threaten to drive me crazy.
Because Iâve tasted her.
I tasted her when she had no idea. Dipping my finger in her tight pussy and not getting a taste would have been blasphemy. In the cover of darkness, taking advantage of her unawareness, Iâd put that finger in my mouth and Iâd sucked it clean.
Even now the memory threatens to make me fall apartâboth from the pleasure of it and the pain. Iâd lost control of myself. Iâd lost all traces of rationality as Iâd given in to the animal within me.
Not too long ago Iâd had my cock positioned right at her hole, her heat beckoning and hypnotizing me. I have to admit that wrenching myself away from her had been the hardest thing Iâd ever done.
And thatâs what shocks me the most.
I donât feel like myself anymore. She put a fucking spell on me that I canât seem to escape.
Sheâs fidgety in her sleep, but the more she moves, the more she graces me with a full view of her exposed flesh.
Iâm so fucking hard Iâm almost bursting, and it wonât take much more for me to come. My fist works my length as I continue to use her for my most obscene fantasies.
She turns on her side, her face towards me as her mouth opens on a low whimper.
My mind is immediately at work, conjuring images of her on her knees, those full lips of hers wrapped around my cock as she sucks me like the born seductress she is.
Fuck but she would obliterate me. Of that, I have no doubt.
The thought of her warm, wet mouth is enough to make me leak, and a few more strokes later Iâm coming in thick spurts, the power of the orgasm making me see stars.
Everything is short lived. As the euphoria wears off, Iâm left with a bitter taste in my mouth and a strong sense of revulsion.
With a silent curse, I stand up, tucking myself in my pants and condemning myself for my weakness.
I shouldnât want her. I shouldnât want .
Yet Noelle possesses something that no other woman I met before or after Lucero ever did.
The ability to shake me to my core.
Lucero had been my spiritual comfort, the other half of my soul, but there had always been a physical barrier between us.
With Noelle, thereâs none. Sheâs flesh and blood. Sheâs there for me to touch and feel.
Maybe if my relationship with Lucero had been or occurred in different circumstances, I wouldnât react so strongly to Noelle.
Maybe.
As I spare her one last glance before I leave the room, itâs to see her eyes wide open, staring at me unflinchingly.
I let my lips curl into an unaffected smirk, giving her a mock salute before leaving the room.
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