Chapter 52: "Subtle Hints"

After months and months of drought, I finally get another Patron \(^_^)/. Shout-out to @AlmasVasim for joining the 'Sarah's Squad'.

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First draft: July 2018

Salma walked towards the coffee house with a painful knot of nerves in her gut. Her muscles got more rigid with every step. She had absolutely no idea what to expect of Zayn. What if he did or said something that she was not ready for? What if her response was not what he hoped for? What if they fought and argued on their very first meet up after becoming a proper couple?

Salma scolded herself for acting and talking on impulse. It was just her luck that her first encounter with him, after deciding against a divorce, had to be unplanned and spontaneous. She wished she would have had more time with him to properly explain where she stood with regards to her feelings for him and what she wanted from this point onwards. She wished they would have set some boundaries and dictated their terms of comfort from the get-go of this new phase. Jumping right back into their normal, bumpy, rollercoaster ride was giving her anxiety.

"Hello?" A hand waved in front of her, making her step back. "Wakey! Wakey!"

Salma blinked to see Zayn in front of her. Her insides turned to ice.

"Oh, hi!" she replied. "Assalamo'Alaikom! Sorry. I didn't see you."

"Wa alaikom Assalam," Zayn replied giving her a coffee. "What's up? Didn't sleep last night out of excitement?"

Salma forced at smile at his question. Excited was the last thing she felt at the moment. Sensing something was off, Zayn's eyed her with concern.

"Everything alright with you?" he asked

"Not really," Salma replied, deciding to stick to being honest and get it out of the way. "I worried too much."

The slight furrow in Zayn's brow deepened.

"What about?"

Salma took a sip of her coffee, wondering how much to tell him.

"How this would go," she said shortly.

"What do you mean how it'd go." Zayn laughed. "Of course it would go like any other day. Why would you worry about that?"

Salma shrugged.

"Just like that," she mumbled, deciding to delve deeper into the topic at some other point. He seemed in too good spirits for her to have the heart to ruin them. "Thanks for the coffee."

"Don't mention it." Zayn nodded.

"And the last dozen of coffees too." Salma smiled. "I appreciate the endless supply."

Zayn smiled ruefully, avoiding her eyes. Salma frowned.

"What?" she asked.

He shook his head, laughing.

"Like I don't know you bought your own, regardless," he said, his lowered gazed fixed on his drink.

"I took the coffee you bought me. Every day. Without fail," Salma emphasized.

"Look, I'm not complaining or anything. You weren't sure --"

"No, you hold on a minute!" Salma rounded on him, making him stop. "You think I refused your coffee?"

"I know you did," Zayn replied, sounding hurt. He kept avoiding her gaze. "You weren't sure about us, so you bought your own drink. I'm --"

"Wrong," Salma cut in. "You're wrong. I didn't buy my own drink. I paid it forward."

Zayn's eyes snapped back at her.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I accepted your coffee, and bought a coffee for some – whoever." Salma shrugged.

Zayn's features changed drastically. Salma could see a smile tugging at his lips.

"How do you know you drank the one I bought and not the one you paid for?" He raised a brow.

"Because I paid for whatever was the order before mine, and drank a regular," Salma replied with a sarcastic smile. Zayn booped her nose. Salma pulled back, massaging it. She startled when she felt an arm wrap around her, bringing her close to him.

"Thank you," he whispered as they started walking again.

"I believe the thanking should be done the other way around," Salma mumbled, trying to tame her unsteady heart at their proximity.

"For accepting my coffee," Zayn replied. "It means the world to me."

Salma said nothing. She busied herself with drink, just to have something to do. It was no secret that he loved it when she let him in, accepting his small gestures of affection and allowing him to express it.

However, Salma had to let him how far in she was willing to let him in, and where she expected him to stop. Her gut churned with anxiety, making the arm around her shoulders seem heavier than it was. She had a feeling she should talk about her dread or it would get real awkward, real soon.

Taking in a deep breath, she turned to him just as he did to her.

"I've been meaning to talk to you about something."

Salma blinked when she realized, they had said the same thing in unison. Zayn chuckled.

"Aw, look at us," he cooed. "Already on the same page."

"I'm serious though," Salma replied, unable to appreciate the joke because of her nerves. "It's important."

"I know, I know. Me too," he replied, stopping outside the biological sciences department. Salma took in a breath of relief when he took his arm off but something about the way he was so nervously excited when he stood in front of her, told her she should not let him speak.

"Good, after my class --"

"Look, I was just wondering if I can finally ask you out on a proper date?" he asked, making Salma's heart stop.

Swallowing, she threw a tantrum at herself in her mind. She knew she not have let him talk. She had a feeling.

"It's been quite the while, Bee," Zayn continued, searching her eyes. Those golden brown irises swimming with the same raw emotions she had seen back at the food court. "Would you go out with me?"

Salma's heart suffered another seizure at the question. She avoided his intense gaze, not sure how to wiggle out of situation.

"Zayn . . . I -I'm sorry, I don't mean any offense but I can't," Salma struggled with her words. Her insides twisted with dread and anxiety, alike.

"Can't?" Zayn echoed, making Salma bite her lips nervously. "Why? What do you --"

"Listen-- I know this sounds . . . absurd," Salma said, "but my parents are really protective . . . and after everything that's happened . . ." She shrugged, hoping he would understand this was out of her hands. "I'm wary of doing anything without their explicit permission."

Salma waited for the disappointment, or the anger or bitterness to get expressed, but that did not happened. By some strange miracle, Zayn showed understanding. He pursed his lips and nodded.

"Okay." He forced a smile. "I think I get it. It's a bit of a downer but that's okay."

Salma relaxed when he waved it off and turned to her with a smile.

"So what did you want to talk about?"

"Oh that." Salma frowned. She had half an hour before her class starts. Now was a good time to talk about it. "Can we meet after class?" Salma ended up saying, not able to summon the courage to present him with another triggering problem. "I really need to like, sit and focus. My mind is a bit all over the place, at the moment."

Zayn laughed.

"Whatever the Bee says!"

Salma thought he looked down but when he casually chatted about one thing or the other as he walked her to class, Salma brushed it off as something not to worry about.

"Right," a demanding voice said the moment they walked around the corner. Salma turned to the source to see a very determined pair of blue eyes trained on her. "You two better start explaining what's going on?"

"Claire?" Zayn frowned at the sight of his sister. "What're you doing here?"

"Getting answers!" She squared off against him. "And you better have them. Right now."

It took Salma a while to realize that the determined blond had turned them around, grabbed each of them by the arm and was heading back out of the block.

"I have a class!" Salma tried to explain.

"In twenty eight minutes, yes," she replied, still pushing them out.

"Claire, what's going on --"

Zayn was cut off at the mouth of the block by Niall skidding into a halt in front of them.

"Oh, you found them?"

"No thanks to you!"

"Hey, they're usually at the coffee house at this time."

Zayn dug his heels into the ground, bringing them all to an abrupt halt.

"Let her go!" he scolded Claire, "What's going on?"

***

"Now explain!" Claire said sternly as she sat across them on one of the tables at the café. They barely ever sat on the benches on the grounds anymore. No one ever said it, but the trauma of the sniper attack still lingered on their minds, making them feel exposed and targeted.

"Explain what?" Zayn said grumpily. He was sitting back in his chair, arms crossed and looking massively unimpressed.

"This!" she pointed at the two of them.

"There's nothing to explain, really," Salma interrupted trying to placate the blond volcano that seemed like it was about to erupt.

"Oh, there's plenty to explain." Niall laughed quietly.

"Zayn's been massively brooding for the past couple of weeks," Claire began. "And he was all smiley since yesterday evening." She eyed her brother shrewdly before continuing. "I knew he had met you, and then when he woke up earlier than usual this morning, I was sure he was rushing to meet up with you."

"Yeah, like all the other morning a few weeks ago." Niall added. "What's going on with you two?"

"Should we be telling you?" Zayn asked.

"Yes!" Claire snapped. "I need to know."

"Why?" Zayn challenged.

"Why? Because – I'm your sister! I just do! Tell me!"

"And if we don't?" Zayn raised a brow.

"Oh come on!" she whined. "Are you guys dating or not, I just want to know!"

Salma almost laughed when Claire folded her hands in front of them, pleading.

"Yeah man, the suspense is killing us." Niall agreed, getting excited. "Is Zalma a go? Like I got a stash of firecrackers I wanted to explode. Just give me a hint, man."

Zayn sighed.

"I'm sorry about these two," he muttered to Salma. "Not all your in-laws are pesky intruders, I promise."

The three of them turned to him in surprise.

"I-In laws?!" Claire eyes popped out. "Y'all got engaged or . . ." she glanced at Niall. "Or married?"

"Don't be silly!" Niall laughed. "Stop being dramatic, Zayn. Just tell us if you guys are dating? Salma?"

"No."

"Yes."

Salma and Zayn looked at one another when they said the contrary.

"Well, I mean . . . yeah, it's sort of a --"

"Undecided?" Salma finished uncertainly.

Claire and Niall eyed them shrewdly.

"She said yes to dating," Claire pointed at Salma, frowning. "You said no. Is it a topsy-turvy day to day?"

"I thought you couldn't date boys . . ?" Niall asked uncertainly.

"Exactly!" Claire added.

"It's different."

"Right." Niall and Claire said in unison.

"It's sort of like a contract between us --"

"You mean marriage?" Claire cut Zayn.

"No!" Salma shouted without thinking. She glanced at Zayn and swallowed. "It's a step before that so, like, we --"

"You mean dating!" Niall provided.

Zayn and Salma opened their mouth, then closed it and sighed.

"Yeah." She gave up.

"We're dating." Zayn replied.

Salma barely just jumped away as the space around them erupted in cheers and the two idiots dived over the table to tackle Zayn.

First Draft: August 26, 2021

"He's just acting like a child!" Spogmae's frustrated voice carried out of the kitchen.

Salma frowned, taking her shoes off quietly.

"He's not," Burak Kaka replied, making Salma stop halfway through undoing her niqab. She pinned it back on her face. "He's been living in isolation since forever. It's bound to drive him up the wall."

"Stop finding excuses for him!" Spogmae retaliated. "He's old enough to know what's at stake!"

"Spogmae is right!" Aliya interjected.

Mum? Salma's froze. What was her mother doing in what sounded like a Green Coat venting session?

"This is no time to blackmail us like this," Aliya continued. "Literal lives are on the line here."

"I wouldn't want a life of imprisonment," Burak mumbled nonetheless.

"Atif Lala?" Spogmae addressed her father.

As they waited for his verdict for whatever it is that they were arguing about, Salma found it odd that Spogmae would address her father as 'Atif Lala'. She had always ever heard the Green Coat address him as 'Commander Rahman'.

"You fly to Turkey for Speen Baaz as you're scheduled to," he replied. "What is done is done. Fortify security around him here."

"Perfect!" Burak exclaimed.

"I don't trust this nutter around him!" Spogmae argued. "He encouraged him to --"

"I deny that accusation, and demand proof!"

"You --"

"Quiet, the both of you!" her father demanded, making Salma jump. She just realized she was eavesdropping on a conversation she was not meant to hear. "Must I always remind you that you're playing for the same team?"

As the mix of embarrassed and angry silence carried out of the kitchen, Salma made her way to her room.

"Spogmae you leave for Turkey, Burak you stay in touch with him."

"Sir!" the two complied.

"What about Salma?" Spogmae asked. "She has a class with Eelay."

"I'll take her with me," her father replied, then raised his voice a notch. "Princess, did you hear that?"

Salma stiffened. Her father knew she was around and listening in?

"Yes dad," Salma replied, realizing there was no point pretending. "Assalamo'Alaikom."

"Wa'Alaikom Assalam," came a united greeting as she stepped into the kitchen.

Her parents and Burak were sitting around the table while Spogmae stood by the counter, looking tense. The Green Coats appeared tired and her mother worried. Her father was the only one who betrayed no emotions.

"Be ready on time," her father said. "I can't be late."

"Yes dad."

"Dawood will shadow her till Burak is back," her father turned to his subordinates, making Salma realize she was dismissed. She decided to go and get some rest before her class.

"Yes sir!"

"Also, get me details of how our security system was bypassed --"

Salma's father's voice cut short abruptly as she shut the door of her room, and sighed. She had a feeling something had gone sideways and she could only hope and pray that it turned out well. Spogmae's frustration made her anxious, but something about Burak Kaka's calm replies and her father's firm decisions made her feel like whatever was disturbed was going to be settled soon. What surprised her was her mother's involvement in the meeting and her knowledge of whatever was being discussed. Salma would have thought more about it, but she was mentally exhausted and was dreading the combat lessons with Eelay. She needed sleep.

***

Salma rolled the empty can on the table idly. Zayn had asked if she was free but he was nowhere to be seen. Someone settled opposite to her. Salma looked up only to see Jason.

"Hi." Salma smiled tiredly.

"It's odd seeing you here." Jason smiled.

Salma stopped rolling the empty can and looked around her. She was sitting on one of the benches on the ground today. Although she picked the one mostly covered by this giant tree.

"Yeah, I realized we have been unintentionally avoiding the benches and thought I should break a mental barrier." Salma smiled. "but if it's making you uncomfortable --"

"Oh no, it's alright," Jason reassured.

"Long time, no see," Salma said. "How are you doing?"

"I'm doing great." He smiled.

"busy?"

"Sort of," he replied.

"Uh huh." Salma chuckled. "I suppose I know what that means."

"You're wrong," Jason defended himself, embarrassed.

"Or am I?" Salma teased. "I mean you go MIA and so does Louisa. It obviously means the two of you have absolutely nothing to do together --"

"Stop!" Jason laughing, going quiet red in face. "She's gone to visit some Sculling Academies, alright. I haven't seen her in days."

"Aw, poor Jason," Salma teased again. "So what have you been up to, apart from pining after --"

"Come on!"

"Fine, fine, I'm just kidding," Salma conceded. "So how's the hacking mission coming along?"

"I think we've made some breakthroughs," Jason eagerly responded, relieved for the change of subject. "We might --"

His phone beeped.

"Just when you asked," he said, getting up. "I have to dash."

"Sure."

"See you around!" Jason waved a bandaged hand

"Hey, what happened to your hand?" Salma frowned at the bandage.

"Oh, it's nothing! Got a minor cut and then the wound got infected," he replied.

"Don't handle mantids with an open wound on the hand."

"It wasn't the bugs." Jason chuckled.

"Take care," Salma replied.

"Thanks. Bye!"

First draft: June 2018

Salma pulled out her laptop to get some work done. Barely fifteen minutes after Jason had left, she was startled when her laptop was suddenly pushed to one side, replaced a phone screen.

"Got it!" Zayn smirked at her, looking triumphant.

"What in the world are you talking about?" Salma cried in surprise, trying to tame her racing heart, "and where've you been? I thought you said --"

"I know, I'm sorry, I got late," Zayn said quickly. "Here watch this. A recorded permission from your dad to allow me to take you out."

"What?"

Zayn played the video. The camera moved about in a familiar room. Salma realized it was her Uncle Dawood office's at the masjid, when Zayn focused the camera on him. He was busily shuffling through the papers on the desk.

"Okay, but can you just say it into the camera, Please?" She heard Zayn's voice. "She really won't believe me."

Her father sighed and looked up.

"Do I have your permission to take Bee out to spend some time with her, please?"

"Yes you can, but behave yourself, both of you," he warned, pointing a finger at the camera. "Stay within the ten miles radius we discussed and I expect you to be mature and decently responsible."

"We will be! Promise and thank you!"

The recording ended.

Salma stared at the frozen image of her father, dumbstruck. This, for her, was unexpected. She had no idea Zayn would actually go and talk to her father to get a permission.

"Well?" Zayn snapped his fingers in front of her, smirking. "What say you? Will you go out with me now?"

Salma released a slow breath. She gingerly placed his phone on the table.

"I can't believe you managed to talk him out of it," Salma mumbled.

Zayn sat down, opposite to her.

"It wasn't that hard a process that may or may not have included religious blackmailing by the local imam to allow a 'halal' relation to grow to avoid 'haram' ones," Zayn said, looking smug.

"I see." She nodded, feeling uneasy. She was yet to talk to him about her boundaries. "So what if I say no to the date?"

Zayn sat back, chewing on his lower lip as he tried to hide his excitement. He looked rather pleased with himself.

"I mean, it's not like I can't pick you and carry you to my car . . ?"

Salma felt a goose bumps on her skin.

"You won't dare!" she warned. "You heard what my father said about being decent and mature."

"Sure did." Zayn shrugged carelessly.

"That includes not engaging in PDA," Salma emphasized, "or coercion."

Zayn sighed, sitting up.

"Right, so how about you don't make me do either?"

Salma's spine stiffened.

"What's wrong now?" Zayn asked, upon noticing her evident unease. He sounded impatient.

"Listen, I know my father said it was alright but they don't appreciate it," Salma began carefully. "My mum didn't take it well the other day and even if I don't really agree, I can see where she's coming from. My well-being is their responsibility. Anything that happens to me will ultimately haunt them and they're the ones dealing with the aftermath --"

"Stop mincing your words," Zayn cut in, his expressions going sour with every word she spoke, "Say it like it is, you lot still don't trust me!"

"Zayn, you've gotten the wrong idea!" Salma tried again. "It's more about being modest and careful--"

"We are Mahrams!" Zayn cried. "We signed a contract, swearing to be with one another, to look after one another. I'm not some random guy looking to hook up with you after we've just met at a bar!"

Salma's gut churned at his inappropriate example.

"I know! I know! I'm not saying it's sinful, but where my parents come from, the tradition is to keep a respectful distance until the girl moves in with the guy," she explained, "My parents are uncomfortable --"

Salma was cut off when Zayn suddenly shot to his feet.

"What next? Your parents would want to keep an eye on what happens in our bed room after you've moved in with me?!" he seethed.

"Zayn!" Salma raised her voice.

"You know what, you're not Muslims following Islam, you're judgmental snobs serving your egos!"

Snatching his phone off the table, Zayn stormed away. Salma looked after him; angry, defeated and miserable.

Thanks mum!

Author's Note:

Yeah no, trouble's not brewing at all *snickers*

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J.