CH 3

But that night, instead of bowing my head to Carcian, I clenched my fists and shouted.

“This is not it!

I huffed and threw my gaze toward the moonlit window. It's already dawn. During this dawn, I couldn't even drink a sip of water.

because.

“Does it make sense to starve just because you have to go on a diet?!”

It's because Betty, who had a grudge against me, told her mother that she was miserable. I couldn't help but roll to his feet.

When I kicked Betty out, I honestly assumed that there would be some kind of aftershock. But I never thought it would be such a despicable way to starve from lunch!

“Yes, Betty was her mother’s limb. So I should have expected her mother and her hand to haunt me… … !”

I was thinking only about the original work I read in my previous life, so I couldn't recall the life before returning. The original work started after my family was massacred, so I overlooked that such trivial stories do not appear.

"okay. The original is also an original, but for the time being, it would be better to think of the life before returning instead of the original.”

That way, he seemed to know a bit about the way the mansion was going.

Before returning, my mother suddenly assigned Betty to me as a maid. At that time, it was stupid to say, 'My mother even gave me an amputee maid!' and she was delighted.

“I was sent as my sentinel.”

I wheeze and muttered.

I still don't know what my mother's intentions are to spy on me.

“But one thing is certain.”

That he was trying to torture me, an illegitimate child, in this way. Betty faithfully fulfilled her role and reported in detail, as her mother intended.

“Otherwise, my mother wouldn’t have come so soon.”

After Carcian ran out, I sat across from Susan, eating cookies and milk. While contemplating together what I should do to relieve Karsian's anger. But then, her mother suddenly came to visit,

'You've gained weight. If I did this, I wouldn't be popular with the spirits.'

I suddenly saw my scar. I looked at her blankly, wondering what kind of madness she was talking about, but her mother left without saying a single word.

'Don't eat anything for the rest of the day. I need to lose weight.'

So my last meal was a cookie and half a glass of milk that I shared with Susan during the day.

growl... … I heard the sound of skin sticking to my back.

“Grunt… … I got a fever and I'm hungry... … .”

With no strength at all, I headed for the bed with a languid step.

A little while ago, Susan was looking outside and went out to bring something to eat. Of course she doesn't expect much.

“Who is your mother… … She was so determined that she threw away all the leftovers.”

Even if it wasn't so, even before the regression, my mother was especially sorry for what I ate. Her sister, Elene, shared all the precious desserts as well as the basic meals. Back then, I only thought you were making me look pretty, but why? It was just something I didn't like.

Not only that, but all the clothes and accessories I wore belonged to Elene. Doesn't her sister usually inherit her sister's things? I was the opposite.

When I asked about this, my mother stroked my hair and said,

'You know how greedy Elene is. It's for her little brother, isn't she a good sister?'

Back then, I liked that one stroke, and I liked calling me Elene's older sister, so I passed on it.

“Stupidly… … .”

I muttered bitterly.

Other than that, taking Elene instead of me, the eldest daughter, to the imperial castle party, and progressing from Elene's engagement. The good thing was that it was always Elene's responsibility.

I was really curious as to why, but now I know.

“It was all because I was an illegitimate child.”

I smiled and buried my face in the blanket. The past life, knowing nothing and just trying to be loved, was so miserable and bitter.

Around that time, Susan returned.

“My lady, I brought you some food!”

"uh? really?"

I jumped up in surprise.

Susan was really holding two loaves of bread and a plate of thin soup.

“Where did you get it? She thought her mother must have abandoned her... … !”

The bread was a bit hard and the soup was cold, but it looked very appetizing because I was starving.

“The chef gave me the late-night snack he was going to eat.”

“A late night snack?”

"yes. He even apologized, saying that if he had known we didn’t eat it, he would have left it out in advance.”

That is to say, they made everything, but later stole it and threw it away. It seemed that he didn't tell the other attendants, fearing that someone might help me.

“Eat, my lady. You must be very hungry.”

Susan gave me both loaves of bread and soup with an apologetic face. As if she had no face because she only brought something like this.

I handed Susan a loaf of bread.

"Let's eat together."

"yes?"

“Susan couldn’t eat anything because she was locked up all the time because of me.”

"However… … .”

“And this soup too.”

I pushed the soup Susan had pushed back towards her.

"Let's eat together. Eating only bread is hard.”

“My lady… … .”

Susan held the bread and looked at me with a smile on her face.

Hum-hum, I'm so moved by something like this... … To say the least, I was pretty bad. But in this lifetime, I will never do that.

I said to Susan with a firm resolve.

“Let’s go eat.”

“Yes, lady.”

Susan whimpered quietly, then poured the soup into another bowl and took a sip. I didn't even eat the soup and ate the bread in a hurry. But Susan only ate a little soup, and she seldom touched the bread.

“Susan, is it because the bread is hard?”

"yes? Oh no.”

Susan smiled shyly as she looked down at the bread she broke into small pieces with her hands.

“The truth is.”

"yes?"

“Mister Karsian was also starving... … Come in.”

“… … What?"

why is he

I wiped the bread crumbs from my mouth and widened my eyes.

"that is… … She said the young lady was suddenly pretending to be nice.”

“Pretending to be nice?”

"yes. You didn't bother the young master. Others have said that.”

said Susan grimly.

“That’s all hypocrisy… … It’s worse, so it should be punished, but they said that they would reflect on it only when there is someone who has been harmed.”

"So… … Are you saying that because I didn't bother Carcian, he's starving now?”

“I don’t know the details because I’m in a hurry to hide food and bring it back. However, the lady's maids passed by and said so.”

"under… … .”

“So a bit… … I am concerned.”

I closed my mouth at Susan's words.

I thought if I didn't bully Karsian, the damage caused by 'me' wouldn't go. But to be treated unfairly because 'my' did something wrong! In this way, even if I did not directly harass Karsian, it would be like indirectly harassing him.

I looked at the untouched soup bowl and said.

“Then give me this.”

“… … yes?"

“I haven’t eaten my share of bread, but I haven’t eaten the soup yet.”

In contrast, Susan is going to finish her soup and leave some bread to give to Carcian.

“So let’s cut it half and give it to Carcian.”

"miss… … .”

Susan covered her mouth with a face that had been touched for a number of times already.

"Yes. My lady was such a kind and warm person... … .”

For a moment, as if thrilled, Susan's eyes were slightly closed, and tears shone slightly at the corners of her eyes.

Oh no. what... … . It's my fault that Carcian starved in the first place.

I got up from my seat with only my hands twitching in embarrassment.

“Let’s go. I may have fallen asleep already, but... … .”

“I won’t go to bed yet. I caught a glimpse of the lights on.”

said Susan, quickly picking up the bowl of soup. I was trying to follow Susan, but I suddenly remembered something and ran toward the desk. Susan watched me with her curious look on her face, and I took her ointment from her desk, which she had brought.

“After Carcian ran out, I was tied up and couldn’t give it to you in the end. I wondered what it would be like if I came back with both sides.”

I looked at him with an expression wondering if he would be a little less vigilant if I served it with rice. At that, Susan smiled warmly and nodded her head.

“Then shall we sneak out?”

We took advantage of the moment when everyone was asleep and quietly headed to Carcian's room.

Originally, his room was in a corner on the same floor as mine. However, when people lost interest in him, he was immediately driven to a barn-like room next to the food warehouse.

As Susan said, light leaked through the crack in the door.

"It's good, I guess I'm not sleeping yet."

Whispering softly, she looked at me as if to knock on the door. While holding the ointment, I knocked softly. Soon after, a small chuckle was heard from inside. But apart from that, there was no answer.

Carcian was being harassed by us, so he seemed to be on guard. So I cleared my throat and spoke first.

“Here, it’s me. Latia.”

There was silence for a moment. After that, there was no answer, so I listened quietly toward the door.

Just in time, the answer came back.

"Go away."