All of us got out into the hallway quietly just after the bell rang. The cafeteria was all empty by now and it was just us trying to walk quietly in the hallway before we sneaked out on terrace.
Even though all the lights were on and bright still you could tell that the weather was dark outside because the contrasting image of bright on the inside and dark on the outside was too much.
"Stay close to me." Alec said softly.
The nine of us stuck to wall around the corner as to not get caught while Xavier peaked his head to look if the coast was clear.
He motioned with his hand to follow him when he was sure while all of us tried to walk as silently as possible because I don't know if this was the dark weather thing but everything sounds ten times more amplified when you are in school during such weather.
Whether you are in cafeteria or in hallways everything sounds too loud than normal.
BAM.
Everyone gasped. We looked at Brian who was sitting on his buttâtrying not to groan in pain.
The sound was too loud that I was damn sure that someone would be already on their way here.
"Are you crazy?"
"For a prankster you sure know how to mess up."
"What are we gonna do now?"
"We have to hide before they come and find us."
If Brian's falling wasn't loud enough everyone's whisper and panic was definitely doing the work.
"Shut up you guys! Don't be too loud! They will hear us and know."
"JUST HIDE!" Xavier whisper yelled before taking Liya by her hands and going to hide.
The rest of us started looking around helplessly. I looked up at Henry and Max for their help but I was shook when I saw them already leaving for their hiding place.
Excuse me? What in the name of Jesus? Did they just leave me, THEIR BEST FRIEND, out here alone while they hide?!
I FEEL BETRAYED.
I took a few steps to run after them but I was stopped the second I felt someone's hand slip into mine.
I stopped in my tracks and felt my heart beating wildly. I did not even try to look back as I took deep breaths.
"Stay with me."
This time I looked back and saw Alec's hand still in mine while there was seriousness in his voice.
He wants me to go with him.
I opened my mouth to say something but he didn't even let me as he intervened our hands together and pulled me with him.
I could feel the warmth of his hands and his fingers wrapped around my hand as I ran with him.
Why? Good friends don't intervene their hands together, do they?
I tried to pull my hands away from his but he only tightened them.
Footsteps. We could hear the footsteps now.
I looked at Alec in alarm but he was just looking around trying to figure out a place.
The janitors closet? But it was just where the sound of footsteps were coming from.
As it came closerâthe footstepsâI could feel my blood turning blue.
"The cupboard." Alec whispered looking at a cupboard just in the corner.
"Are you crazy?" I said contemplating the space it has to offer us.
"Just enough for the both of us to fit." He said and took me to the cupboard.
As we stood just in front of the cupboard I shook my head at him letting him know that I was not getting in there.
"Do you want to get caught?" He asked exasperated.
"No."
"Exactly." He said before opening the cupboard and pushing me lightly inside before getting inside himself.
I pushed myself against the far corner but because it wasn't too spacious it wasn't worth it at all. Alec got inside and closed the door slowly just leaving it a tiny bit open so that a splint of light could come inside and we could breath.
I looked down and didn't even try looking up as I was trapped between him as his hands were touching the cupboards on either side of me.
The footsteps were almost a few distance away. I tried to control my breathing because what do you expect after running around for a while now?
I lifted my eyes up a little to only find him already looking down at me. The light which was coming in from the creak hit his side profile as he passed me a small smile before muttering an apology.
I wanted to laugh at my life. I remember making sure to never get involved with him and guess where I was? Trapped in a cupboard with him alone with almost little to none space.
That's the thing, the more you try to run away from something life will do everything to not let you. It will throw every kind of opportunity it can to make you stay.
I automatically looked through the creak at the silhouette just outside. The footsteps were just outside the cupboard. I held my breath trying to not make any kind of sound. My eyes turned to Alec and saw him looking out too.
When I couldn't hear any footsteps or see the silhouette anymore I heaved a sigh before whispering, "Is he g-"
Alec looked at me alarmed before pressing his hands on my lips making me fall quiet. My eyes widened as I felt his hand on my lips.
I tried to remove his handsâletting him know that I was going to be quiet. He nodded his head before taking them back.
I was afraid. Afraid that he might listen to my heartbeat beating wildly that's why I was avoiding any kind of physical touch.
Because I don't know what was wrong with my heart but it was reacting strange around him these days. I guess I know what it's supposed to mean but his words about just being a 'good friend' rings in my ears.
Beside one cannot start liking a person in a few days, can they?
"They are gone." He sighed finally before opening the door and stepping out. I could feel the warmth of his body leaving immediately and being surrounded by the cold air again.
"Come on." I looked up and saw Alec holding out his hand for me.
I contemplated whether to take it or not before I politely declined him.
He looked at me with a different kind emotion in his eyes. I couldn't tell what he was thinking but I saw him purse his lips before walking away.
Was he mad?
I ran behind him, "Are you mad?"
He didn't look back and continued taking long strides, "Why would I be?"
"Then why does it seem like you are suddenly ignoring me?"
"I am not." He stated.
"Yes you are. You are running away."
He stopped suddenly. Turning around he faced me,
"Why would I?"
"That's what I am asking. Why does it matter if I take your hand or not. Why does it matter if go with Henry or Max. Why do you always hold me back?" I burst out. He seemed surprised.
I don't know what made me say that out aloud but I finally said it. I wanted to know what was going inside that head of his. What was he thinking. I needed a clearance.
"I don't know." He looked down at his feet.
I stared at him dumbfounded. I didn't know what to say. What do I even say to that.
He doesn't know? Is that the best he could come up with?
"You don't know?" I asked silently.
The sound of lightening filled up the hallway we were standing in. There was no other sound or anyone. Just the two of us.
He slowly nodded his head before looking at me through the veil of his eyes.
"Are you playing with me?" I finally asked. I couldn't believe the fact that he didn't know. So this was the only conclusion I could come up with, that he was playing with my feelings.
Helping me in chemistry, having the same love for the paintings, coming all the way to my house to apologise, spending time with me so that I don't feel all alone in the house, laughing together at our failure in cooking, giving me my favourite chocolate, talking about his mother and letting me meet her.
Was that all the part of the plan where he plays with my feelings and makes me like him but ends up just calling me a good friend?
"No. No. No. No." He said hastily and came towards me. I pushed him a little away as he looked at me hurt, "I am not playing with your feelings. Trust me. That's the last thing I want. It's just..." he stopped and looked around exasperatedârunning his hands through his blonde hairâbefore sighing.
"What?"
"It's just that I love spending time with you. I want to be around you. I want to know you. I feel good when I am with you."
I felt my throat dry. So he felt it too. It wasn't just me. Then why? What was stopping him?
"But I think I need some time."
I looked at him confused.
"I think the feelings I am feeling might be because I just want to be friends with you."
Maybe that is what he wants to believe. And if a person wants to believe something then there is nothing one can do.
"I see."
"So stay with me." He said in a low voice.
And that was when I realised that even Alec was being selfish right now.
I could see that he wasn't ready to accept the fact that he could have feelings for me other than Liya.
But he wasn't ready to let me go either.
____