Chapter 57: Chapter Twenty-Two

Natalee

I awoke to Alec kissing me, which on one hand could be considered slightly horrifying.

I opened my eyes. His large body was hovering over mine. “Hey.”

“Hey, yourself.” I blinked my eyes so they could adjust to the pure male beauty in front of me, and then Alec smiled. It was his same magic smile, the one he reserved only for me. I sighed.

After a few minutes of silence, Alec spoke. “He's sorry.”

“I don't care if he's sorry. Sorry means he realizes what he did was wrong. Sorry means he wasn't lying to me the entire time we were together. How the hell can you defend him?”

Alec cursed. “He's my brother. It's my job to protect him. Even if it's from himself. You don't understand. It's complicated.”

“And me? What about me?” I tried to wriggle away from him, but his arms braced my shoulders as he leaned down and kissed my forehead.

“I'm pretty sure my only job from here on out is to show you how much I love you.”

Damn him. Leave it to Alec to say the one thing that melted all my defenses and made me want to throw my body at him like some lovesick teenager. Then again, if the shoe fit…

“Alec?” My voice cracked. “Was he lying the whole time?”

Cold air met me as Alec threw back the covers and joined me in my bed. “No, Nat. He really did care about you. I think in his own twisted way he thought he was doing us a favor.”

“By being a bastard?”

“Come on, take his age into account, he's immature.”

“He's a year younger than you,” I pointed out. “Besides, how is him being a complete ass helping anyone?”

“It's com—”

“I swear if you say it's complicated one more time I'm going to throw you out the window.”

Alec laughed and nuzzled my neck. “I'd like to see you try.”

“You doubt me?”

His tongue blazed a trail down my neck. “Absolutely.”

A moan escaped my lips before I could pretend to be totally indifferent to his kisses and his touch.

Alec pulled my body against his, then dipped his hands behind my head, pulling it so I was resting on his shoulder, staring directly at his lips.

“Now what?” I whispered, still focused on the perfect shape of his jaw as his lips broke into a smile.

“I have my way with you?”

I rolled my eyes and pushed away enough to look up at his face. “You're so romantic. Really, you take my breath away. I almost swooned just now. Good thing I'm lying down.”

Alec chuckled and brought my hand to his lips to kiss it. “Fine, I won't have my way with you yet… but,” he laced his fingers in between mine, “I'd really like to take you out on a date.”

I wanted to date him. I wanted to do much more than that, but what would people say?

“People are going to say I'm a whore.”

“Don't.” Alec's grip tightened on my hand as he pulled me closer to him. “This is my fault, not yours. I should have stayed away from you.”

“I'm glad you didn't.”

We stayed like that for what felt like an eternity, both of us searching the other's eyes, willing the other person to say something, to confess that it's been like this since our first meeting.

It wasn't ever just a pen that he picked up off the floor.

It was so much more. And though I tried to be with the guy that Alec kept pushing me toward, my heart wouldn't ever let go.

“Stupid pen,” I grumbled.

“Huh?”

I giggled. “Never mind. So…” I played with the hair on the back of his head, twisting it between my fingers. “About this date.”

“I'll do anything. Just don't stop.” Alec rested his head against my chest and groaned.

“Our date?” I reminded him.

“Uh-huh.” His hands wrapped around my body, hugging me close to him as I continued to play with his hair and rub his neck. “I think I may like this better than sex.”

I froze.

“Damn, did I say that out loud?” Alec tensed above me. I burst out laughing.

“At least I know what I need to do to get you to confess to me all your dirty little secrets.”

“That's bribery and manipulation, a federal offense…” His words trailed off as he moaned again and relaxed against me.

“You were saying,” I whispered as I wrapped my hands around the base of his neck then worked down to his broad shoulders.

“Marry me.”

“No.”

“Why?”

“Because you only asked so you'd have a personal masseuse.”

“I have other reasons.”

“I'm sure you do.”

“Fine, but I'm asking again tomorrow,” Alec grumbled and turned his head so his ear was pressed against my chest.

His admission should have scared me. I mean, he was kidding, but I knew Alec. He didn't really kid about stuff.

He was the serious one, the brooding one, the one who made girls want to pass out when he crooned into the microphone. I shivered.

“You cold?”

Nope, just hot for you and pretty freaked out that you just joked about marrying me. “I'm good.”

“Nat.”

“Hmm?”

“I love you.”

Holy crap. I froze again. It felt like my heart stopped beating, but I knew I was alive because I was still breathing. He really needed to stop surprising me like that.

I took an earth-shattering breath.

“I love you, too.”

****

I got into the backseat of Alec's SUV and began nervously wringing my hands together. I knew Demetri would be riding with us.

I also knew Demetri probably noticed that Alec didn't sneak back into their house until about an hour ago. It didn't help that he had a very satisfied grin on his face.

I took special care in dressing plain. I didn't want anyone staring at me; I wanted no attention whatsoever. To get attention meant people would notice the not-so-subtle looks Alec threw my way.

Demetri emerged from the house. He opened the car door and glanced at me. “Hey, Nat.” His voice was sad.

“Hey, Demetri.”

“Listen—” Demetri turned around while Alec drove the car out of the driveway. Oh gosh, there wasn't any escape at all.

I had to sit there and look into Demetri's eyes while he made me feel like a complete jerk, when really he was the one who was whoring around. Not that I was any better.

“I'm sorry.”

“Huh?” I felt my jaw drop.

He shrugged. “I'm sorry I lied.” And that was it. He turned back around. No more apologies, no more words. It was as if the past few months didn't even happen.

Our history together, the drama between the two of them. I mean, didn't I at least get an explanation?

The rest of the ride to school was filled with awkward silence and the sound of my breathing. At least that's what it felt like.

“Hey…” Alec grabbed me as I sat on the edge of the seat, my legs hanging out the door. “If it makes you feel better, it's rare for him to admit he's wrong about anything.”

I nodded. “Okay,”

“Class?” Alec held out his hand. I grabbed it. Yes, people would talk and they would stare, but I needed his strength to get me through the day.

By the time the lunch bell rang, I was actually feeling pretty positive about the whole situation.

“Nat!” Evan waved me over to our usual table. “So,” he said when I took a seat. “You cut off his balls?”

“Evan!” I slapped him and felt my cheeks blush crimson. “It's not as bad as that. I mean, he's a rock star. It's not my business if that's the circle he wants to date in.”

“Huh?” Evan looked between me and Alec then leaned forward. “Not talking about last night's news, Nat. I'm talking about today's.”

“Today's?” I looked to Alec, but his eyes were already trained on something across the room. His jaw clenched. I followed his eyes and gasped.

Demetri was making out with a girl from my class. His hands everywhere on her body. I gripped the chair and called him every name I could possibly think of in my head.

Alec made a move to get up. I reached out and stopped him. “Just let him, Alec. If this is how he wants to deal with the past few months, then let him.”

Alec did not look convinced. In fact, it looked like he wanted to murder someone. He pulled out his cell and in very clipped, scary tones ordered one of the security team to give Demetri aid.

Sure enough, Bob moved very swiftly through the gathering crowds and whispered something in Demetri's ear as he assaulted the girl in his chair.

He leaned back, just enough to make eye contact with me, and then with his eyes open kissed the girl again, alternating between licking her face and tugging her lower lip.

It was like watching porn.

If porn took place in high school.

And the lead was a rock star.

“Sometimes I hate my brother.” Alec cursed. “Now do you wonder why we need to take a year off touring? Clearly we've got issues.”

“We?” I lifted my eyebrow.

“Yeah, we.” Alec looked down and cursed again.

Within minutes Demetri's little show was over, and wonder of all wonders, as he walked away from the girl who was now pouting in the corner, he grabbed another.

What type of girl kisses another guy when they still have remnants of a previous kiss plastered across their face?

She pulled back after a few minutes. And I watched Demetri stagger behind Bob as he was escorted out of the cafeteria.

“Is he drunk?”

Alec was silent.

“Alec?”

“Probably.” He looked away. “He doesn't handle rejection well.”

“He did this!” I pointed at the door, angry that Alec would again take the blame for choices someone else was making. “Not us!”

Alec looked like he wanted to scream; he shook his head and then ran his fingers through his hair. “I know, Nat. It's just hard to watch this again.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I'll tell you, just not now.”

I nodded, but didn't trust his word. Both guys had been ridiculously secretive about whatever incident happened between them two years ago.

The bell rang. “Come on, I'll walk you to class.” He threw my bag over his shoulder and grabbed my hand.

The rest of the day went by smoothly. Two girls asked me if I was dating the other brother in AD2 now that Demetri was clearly occupied. I glared, and briefly contemplated giving them the finger.

Needing to calm my temper, I stomped over to my locker and threw my books inside. Escape… I needed to escape before I said something that would make me more of a target.

I pushed through the front doors of my school, a hand reached out and jerked me back just as my feet touched the curb.

It was Demetri.

“Nat,” he groaned, pulling me against him, his head dipping down as if he wanted to kiss me. He smelled like whiskey, I pushed away from him but he held me fast. “Nat, I didn't mean it.”

“Demetri, stop, you're drunk.” Frantic, I looked around for Alec, but he wasn't anywhere near us. Kids continued to trickle out of the school. Please hurry, Alec.

“I'm not that drunk.” He swayed on his feet. Really? He was completely and totally wasted. “I just need to talk to you. I just want to tell you why!”

Okay, no shouting. I patted him on the arm. “Okay, why?”

“I love you.”

Oh no.

“I love you so much and I know you love him! I know you do! I saw you two, the way you looked at each other! I didn't want to be second.” Here we go again with this second crap.

“Listen, Demetri. You really need to get your crap together. I'm sorry we didn't work out.

“We didn't.” He looked down and shoved his hands in his pockets. “We didn't hook up, I kept thinking about you.

“I saw them, Nat. I wanted to respond so bad, but I needed time to think. And then Alec does what he does best.”

“What's that?”

“Steals the only girl I love.”

“Oh, so he makes a habit of that?” I sneered, angry that he would again blame Alec for his obvious poor choices.

“You have no idea how messed up we are.”

“I'm beginning to understand,” I answered, teeth clenched.

“He stole her.”

“Okay, Demetri.” I patted him on the arm and stepped around him.

He reached out and tugged me against him. “No, you don't understand. My girlfriend. He slept with her, got her pregnant, abandoned her.”

Nausea rolled over me. “He said it was a one-night stand.”

“With my girlfriend.” Demetri scowled. “Who was too much of a good girl to even think about sleeping with me. She slept with him.”

I gulped. I wanted to throw my hands over my ears and tell him to stop talking, that I couldn't listen anymore, but I was frozen, unable to move as he stepped closer and continued.

“She was mine!” Demetri's voice cracked. “And he knew it! He was such a cocky son of a bitch. We were drunk. He said I needed to seal the deal. I told him it was impossible, so we made a bet.”

I didn't like where this was going.

“He said if he got into her pants that I owed him a new car.” Demetri looked away from me, tears blurring his large blue eyes. “I laughed it off. Alec was always the player.

“I knew he'd try, but she loved me. I knew she loved me. Just like I knew you loved me. And now…” Demetri cursed and punched the wall with his fist, blood trickling down his knuckles.

The wall where we stood began to spin. I tried to balance myself, tried to lean on Demetri but he had already walked off, leaving splatters of blood in his wake. I fell to my knees.

“Nat!” Alec called my name, but it hurt too much to breathe let alone speak. “Nat!”

I swallowed, air whooshed by my ears. My eyes began to feel heavy as tunnel vision took over.

“Nat!” His voice was closer, and then I was moving through the air. “Damn it, Nat. Don't you dare pass out on me!” Alec's hand was warm against my face. My eyes flickered and then focused on him.

He half-carried me, half-walked me to his SUV and helped me inside. Too shocked to say anything, all I could do was stare at the heating vents in front of me.

The slam of the car door jolted me back from my current state. I looked at Alec and gasped.

Blood trickled from his lip.

“You lose a fight?” I asked weakly.

“Not funny.” Alec hit his hands against the steering wheel. “You scared the crap out of me, Nat! Are you okay? Did you eat today?”

I looked down at my trembling hands. “No.”

He cursed again and pulled out of the parking lot. I tried to sit up to buckle my seatbelt, but by the time I fumbled with the lock, he had already driven into the McDonald's driveway.

He ordered me fries, ice cream, and a Coke.

“Sugar, salt, carbs, and caffeine.” Alec parked in a nearby lot and turned off the car. He pushed the food towards me and nearly growled when he said, “Eat. Now.”

“No.”

“Nat, I'm not in the mood to argue with you.”

“And I'm not in the mood to hear about your entire sordid history with Demetri, but that's what happened about fifteen minutes ago!”

Alec's eyes widened, he looked away and didn't say anything for a very long time.

“He told you everything.”

I nodded even though he wasn't looking at me. “Tell me it isn't true.”

Alec laughed bitterly. “I can't do that.”

“Can't or won't?”

After a heavy sigh, Alec looked at me, his eyes full of sadness. “I can't deny the truth. I did everything he said, and what's probably worse is I got her hooked on drugs in the process.”

I closed my eyes.

“Nat…” His voice was a whisper.

“Just take me home.”

We rode home in silence. My brain tried to put together the pieces of the puzzle. Alec had single-handedly destroyed a woman's life, all because of his cocky attitude and rock star ways.

He hurt his brother so much that I'm surprised they still spoke to one another. And now it all made sense.

Being first and second.

The way they had switched roles.

Demetri dealt with pain the way Alec had originally dealt with life. Drink, have sex, and numb yourself to everything around you.

When the car pulled up to my house I didn't move.

“Nat…”

I closed my eyes, unable to believe I was about to utter the words that I was thinking. “Tell me everything.”

“It's complicated. I don't think...”

“Tell me. Now.”