Chapter 10: Chapter Ten

Alec

It was like watching a car crash. On one side of the room, Demetri was attacking a girl; on the other side of the room, innocent little Nat was making her way towards Demetri and the slut he was with.

Hell. Why did I have to be the mature one? Why did I have to hold her hand while he broke her heart? I wanted to fix it, I wanted to punch my brother in the face, but I also wanted to protect him.

He liked her—he was just drunk, but how do you explain that to someone like Nat? Someone who'd never seen ugly in the world? Who still believed in Christmas and the freaking tooth fairy?

With a curse, I made my way towards her and blocked her view of Demetri, then grabbed her hand.

“Alec.” She jumped in surprise.

“Hey”—I leaned in so people wouldn't hear us—“Maybe we should go?”

Nat's face softened. “Are you sick?”

Hah! “Something like that.” If sick included wanting to chop my brother's balls off, then yeah, call 911.

“Okay, well… um, let me just go talk to Demetri first.”

“Nat, don't.” I lunged for her hand, but she jerked away from me.

“Don't worry! It will just take a second.”

Yeah, I was going to be witness to Demetri losing his life. And it wasn't going to be because of drugs.

I chased after her and swore when she froze mid-step and then covered her mouth with her hands.

“Nat, stop.” My arms shot out around her and I lifted her into the air, carrying her outside so she didn't escape but mainly so she wouldn't crumple to a crying heap on the ground.

Once we reached the car, I unlocked the doors, set her in the seat, and buckled her seatbelt. A soft rain started falling against the glass as I started the car and drove off towards her house.

At first, I didn't think she was going to.

Instead, water basically exploded from her beautiful eyes and trailed down those soft cheeks. I felt every one of those tears as if it had been me cheating, as if I was the reason for them.

I stopped in front of the beach house and carried her through the door. Gently, I set her on the couch and went to turn on the lights.

For some reason, the light made her cry harder. Great. Maybe it was because she was embarrassed. Shit. I did not know how to deal with crying girls.

I mean, in theory, you'd think I'd be all over it. Girls full-on sobbed in front of me on a regular basis; one time a girl choked on her spit so hard she actually puked—all over my favorite shirt.

But, I liked Nat… Helpless, I did the only thing I knew to do. I made tea and got on my phone and ordered pizza. Like a total ass.

“Here.” I thrust it in her hands. Unsure of what to do next.

“Thank you,” she mumbled.

I knelt in front of her and used my thumbs to wipe the remaining tears from her eyes. “I'm sorry, Nat. He's drunk. I know that's no excuse, believe me.

“But if he was in his right mind, he would have never done that. I know he likes you.” There. I'd done my job. I'd defended my brother—even though he didn't deserve it.

Nat gave a numb nod and huffed. So I tried again.

“Want me to beat him up for you?”

She perked up. “Would you?”

I nodded and smiled,

“Maybe just a black eye.”

“Done.” Carefully, so as not to make her cry again, I sat next to her on the couch and listened to the clock tick.

Nat set the mug on the table and started to get up. “I should go home. I mean—it's getting late.”

“Fine, but if you go home, I'm going with you. Your choices are as follows.

“Stay with me, while I sleep on the floor guarding your virtue from my brother if he decides to track you down, or I'm crashing at your place. It's not safe for you to stay by yourself, Nat.

“Your parents are gone, right?” Shit. She couldn't leave. I didn't trust her to leave; I didn't trust her with me or without me.

I ran my fingers through my hair.

Nat had a good head on her shoulders, I got that, but leaving her when she was weak just reminded me of all those times I'd left Demetri and he'd almost died via an overdose.

You don't bail on someone when he's at his weakest moment. You hold on for dear life and swear never to let go—even if it means you have to threaten their sorry ass.

“Look, I know it's Seaside and not L.A. I just don't feel good with you being there by yourself. You should hang here for a while.”

She nodded. “You don't have to do that, Alec.”

“Yes. I do.” Emotion clogged my throat, I so, so, so, do. “So, what will it be?”

Her eyes darted around the room. “I guess we could stay here.”

“Good, because I already ordered pizza.”

Her laugh was like a punch to the gut. Good, she was laughing. The tears were gone, for now.

“When did you do that?”

“I have my ways. Apparently, there's an app for that.” I teased.

Nat giggled. “Always is.”

My smile fell. “Are you going to be okay?”

“Of course.” Nat looked down at the mug, her lower lip trembled. At least when she lied she was really, really pretty.

My eyes narrowed.

She must have known she didn't convince me because she said again, “I'll be fine. I promise.”

“Says the raccoon,” I muttered under my breath as more black made its way down her face.

“Jerk!” She laughed and playfully pushed me away from her. “I knew I shouldn't have worn mascara.”

“It's not like you need it anyway.” I stared hard at those long lashes. Damn, they were beautiful. “You have the thickest dark eyelashes I've ever seen.

“It's like you're waving every time you blink. Actually, I'd like to think it's a greeting each time, ‘Hey, Alec. How you doin', Alec?’”

Nat burst out laughing. It was probably the longest conversation we'd ever had and I'd made her laugh twice.

“Oh my gosh!

“Oh, I hope so.” I grinned and jumped up from the couch, my heart skipping a bit in my chest. “That would be entertaining for me.”

“Yes, and it's all about you,” she joked.

I turned and offered a warm smile. “No. It's about you.” It had always been about her. How could she not see that? Everything that I did, everything that Demetri did, it revolved around her.

Nat's eyes widened, she chewed her lower lip and leaned towards me, I don't even think she was aware she was doing it. But she was begging me to kiss her.

Everything about the way her body leaned, her cheeks flushed, her eyes full of wonder and curiosity. One look at my past and that wonder would be gone, that hero worship? Tarnished.

“So…” I tried to push down the need to touch her. “Until the pizza gets here, what do you say we play some cards?”

“Cards? You play cards?” Her eyebrows shot up in surprise. What? Did she think I just wrote music and stared at myself in the mirror and clapped or something?

“Um, yeah? What else do you think there is to do on tour buses?”

“Sing?” She offered it as a question.

“I think not.” I sauntered to a drawer and pulled out a deck of cards and a pad of paper. “I take a vow of silence while I'm on the bus, saves my voice.” Besides.

Demetri did enough talking for the both of us. Swear he made a guy want to be a mime.

“A vow of silence?” she repeated.

I nodded and winked.

“How exactly does that work?”

Damn, she was too cute. I shrugged and lifted my hands into the air.

“Oh, very funny.” She narrowed her eyes and ripped the deck of cards out of my hands. The brief sizzle of her skin made me catch my breath. “So a vow of silence. So you're like a monk?”

“Sure.” I smiled. “Just call me Gandhi.” I was so not feeling monk-like tendencies in that moment. Not at all.

“Was he a monk?” she questioned.

“I have no idea. That's why I'm in school, to learn smart crap like that.”

Nat laughed again, this time her shoulders shook a bit as she visibly relaxed. “So what game are we playing?”

“Go fish,” I said in a serious voice.

“Seriously?”

“Oh, absolutely.” I grinned and reached for the countertop, revealing a giant pack of Swedish Fish.

“So, this is how it works, every time a player says “go fish,” you have to literally go fish, but you can't use your hands.” It was the best game ever. And I'd totally just pulled it out of my ass.

I mean, in theory I'd always wondered if it would work since I'd seen it played with Cheerios but now was as good a time as any to try. Plus, any excuse to see her laugh, any excuse to touch her?

Yeah. I'd take it.

“What do I use?” She stared at the bag in my hands.

“Your mouth.” I said it as casual as I could but winked so she'd know it wasn't serious, when actually, my heart was damn near exploding. “And you can't let your lips touch the counter, it has to be all teeth.

“Cheaters will be punished.” I would love. To. Punish. Her. Hell, my mind was going to be my worst enemy.

“You've played this before?”

“Oh, honey, if this was an Olympic sport I'd have more medals than Phelps.” HAH—lies. Actually, I was good at cards but again, new game, and totally new opponent. Maybe I'd just let her win…

“Crap.” She dealt the cards with ease and went first.

Within ten minutes, Nat had already eaten five Swedish Fish and accidentally touched the table with her lips twice. I hated to admit that I was jealous of my own coffee table. But there it was.

I was jealous and a little pissed off that her lips touched the table when they wouldn't come anywhere near mine. Another minute later and her lips were on the table again.

After the first game, I had only had four fish while Nat was working on finishing the bag, poor thing. The good news? It looked like the sugar was helping. A knock sounded at the door.

“Oh, that's the pizza.” I shot out of my seat and then paused halfway to the door. “NO cheating.”

Nat's eyelashes batted at me as she lifted her hands in the air in innocence. Innocent my ass. That woman was competitive. But who cheated at the Swedish Fish game? I mean, really.

I paid the pizza guy and brought it back to that damn coffee table. When I sat it down, Nat's stomach growled.

“I knew you were hungry.” I went into the kitchen and grabbed some plates and napkins and set them down in front of her. “You gotta eat before you go to a party, Nat. That's like partying 101.

“Never drink on an empty stomach, kay? Promise me if you ever go to a party again and plan on drinking that you'll eat beforehand?”

And the dad award goes to….

Shit. Way ta kill any attraction.

I may as well have had the birds and the bees talk with her and handed her a tampon or something.

Nat rolled her eyes. “I promise, Mom.”

“Thanks, sweetie.” I patted her head and laughed.

We ate in silence, well I mean there was no speaking but there was a hell of a lot of looking. I'd look at her; she'd look back, then find sudden interest in her pizza.

Then I'd clear my throat and watch the clock move on the wall. It didn't help that Demetri kept drunk-texting me. I was glad he was safe, but still. The circumstances sucked. But I deserved it.

I really did. I deserved to be tortured while I sat with Demetri's girlfriend. Hands off. I needed to really learn the meaning of not getting involved.

My phone rang again. Pissed, I just tossed it under the pillow and swore.

She ate three pieces. I pretty much fell in love right then and there.

“Thank you.” Nat wiped her mouth and smiled.

I ate five pieces so she wouldn't feel like a pig. I mean, it was the least I could do. Poor thing.

“Anytime.” I took our plates back to the kitchen. “How about one more game?”

“You're on!” She giggled. I paused. She never giggled, she laughed, she put her whole body into that damn laugh. But she never once giggled.

I dropped the plates off at the sink and returned to my seat, then announced. “You cheated.”

She giggled again. Her eyes twinkling. “No, I didn't.”

“You're giggling.”

“I'm a girl!” She fired back as if offended. HAH, says the giggler.

I narrowed my eyes at her. “Fine, I'll play. But if I lose, I'll know, Nat. I'll know.”

“I'm not afraid of you.”

I leaned across the table, stopping when my face was only inches from hers. “You should be.” Because if she didn't watch it, I was going to go back on my promise to my brother.

Nat's eyes fell to my lips.

Her tongue snuck out.

I stifled a moan and jerked back, clearing my throat. “Do you have any sixes?” Shit, I almost said sexes.

“Go fish.”

Glaring, I leaned over to pick the fish off the table; my lips grazed the little red gummy without touching anything.

Weird how just having my lips close to where hers had already touched—made me want to drop the fish out of my mouth and lick. I was losing my damn mind.

Nat's chest heaved as I slowly lifted my gaze from the table to her face. Her mouth parted a bit. My breathing picked up, and I fought with every bit of control I had to finish the game.

Ten fish later and I knew she'd cheated.

“I think I may be sick,” I announced before dipping my head back towards the table and grabbing another fish.

“Aw, too many fish? We can just call the game now. I mean, it's not like you're going to win,” came her sarcastic reply.

The little cheater! I picked up the fish and spit it in her direction. I was resorting to elementary flirting. Her mouth dropped open, and then she grabbed the bag and started pelting me with fish.

“Ah!” I jumped out of my chair and tackled her to the floor, trying to force a handful of fish into her mouth. It was a reaction. One I wasn't aware I was having until it was too late.

Until my weight was nearly crushing her, until I felt her breasts graze against my chest. Until I felt every breath she took. Until I could almost taste the sweetness of her tongue.

Nat closed her eyes and shook her head back and forth to keep me from shoving the fish into her mouth. I laughed, and then that same movement started to make my body want to cry.

Nat's eye flashed open.

I stared.

She stared back.

I felt my head lower; I wasn't in control of my own body, I couldn't help it. I didn't want to help it.

Nat closed her eyes; our lips were about half an inch apart.

“Alec!” The voice jolted both of us away from one another. I cursed and helped Nat up. Demetri was walking through the door… well, stumbling and winding through the hallway was more like it.

“I can't find Nat! I messed up! Where is she? Is she okay?” Demetri's words were slurring together. “Some guy told me I was making out with a chick that wasn't Nat. I didn't know, dude.

Ah, so he was going to lie about it. I knew Demetri, he may be drunk but he knew he was making out with a random chick. He would have had to be very high not to know.

He tumbled into the living room, still not looking in my direction. He smelled like cigarettes and whiskey. “Where's she, man?”

Nat cleared her throat. I wanted to step in front of her, but she seemed pissed enough to take care of herself.

“Natalee!” Demetri opened his arms; she stepped back.

“Just sleep it off, bro.” I tried to lead him towards the stairs but he fought against me.

“No! Natalee, I'm so sorry, Babe. I'm so sorry!” He fell to his knees and looked like he was ready to cry. “It wasn't what you think! I'm so drunk — she had blonde hair, I thought she was you!”

I rolled my eyes. Please tell me she didn't actually believe that shit.

“Really? And when you found out you were wrong you decided to do what? Kiss her back?” Nat yelled.

“I'm so sorry!”

“Sleep it off, Demetri.” Demetri stumbled against me again, this time I tried to steady him on the first stair but he stumbled backwards and took a swing at me. Hell no.

“A promise is a promise,” I muttered before punching my brother directly in the eye.

Demetri cursed as he tumbled to the ground and promptly passed out.

Nat covered her face with her hands. “Is he okay?”

Did I look like I cared if he was breathing? I shrugged. “Besides having a headache and the black eye I promised, yeah, he'll be fine.”

Nat was still frozen in place.

“Come on.” I held out my hand. “Let's go upstairs and get you into bed. I don't care what you say. I'm sleeping on your floor just in case the drunk wakes up and decides to apologize again.”

“Okay.” Her eyes were still on Demetri.

“Happy?” I swore.

“Yes.” Nat shifted on her feet. Great, now I was scaring her. Had she any idea how important she was?

I led her down the hall to my room. No way was I leaving her in Demetri's bed like a present just waiting to be opened.

“I'll just grab you some sweats to sleep in, kay?” I scratched the back of my head then went to a walk-in closet and turned on the lights.

“Will these work?” I tossed her a pair of sweats that would hopefully hide every curve of her body.

“Yeah, they're fine.” She pulled them close to her chest and swallowed.

I looked down at the floor. “Do you want to shower?”

“Kind of, I mean, if that's okay. If not, it's totally fine. I can just go to sleep and—”

“Nat, stop talking so fast, you're making me nervous.” At least that part was honest.

She snorted.

Okay fine. So we made each other nervous. “I'll just sit out here and read for a bit.

When I looked at her she quickly turned around and nearly collided with the wall.

“Careful.” I chuckled. Was it possible? That she was attracted to me? Even just a little bit?

She blushed and slammed the door behind her. I was waiting for the lock to turn.

It didn't.

Damn it. Did the woman have no self-preservation? For the love of God! All I had to do was walk in! And I'd see her naked.

Great. That wasn't helping my current state of arousal.

I snatched a book off the nightstand and tried to focus on the words on the page, but the shower turned on.

And my imagination went into overdrive as I imagined water droplets falling off her body—soap sliding down her skin.

“Shit.” I closed the book and briefly thought about taking a dip in the ocean. I hadn't had sex since the incident.

I wasn't a freaking saint!

I needed to throw something, break something, kill something.

The shower turned off—and that was when I realized I had actually been sitting there sweating.

With a growl I peeled my shirt off and started rummaging through my dresser for something else.

A hand touched the skin on my back.

I jumped a foot. “Crap!” My body slammed backwards against the dresser. That will teach me to lust. “Sorry, Nat, I was lost in thought. Didn't see you.” Nope, I was too busy fantasizing about you.

Her eyes were trained on my collarbone. “What does this mean?”

Had the girl never seen a tattoo?

Nat's hands slid over my skin. And I knew—I knew in that instant. I would do anything to keep her hands there.

History was going to repeat itself. And I was sorry—sorry all over again. Sorry that it had to be Nat, sorry that I was going to take her, sorry that I was going to break my brother's heart.

Sorry that in order to keep mine intact—I needed her.