Posted on June 2, 2022by Soafp
âOh, isnât that the cross-dressing grand prix we saw earlier?â
â It was really cute!!â
âThat was Shinjo-kun, wasnât it? Heâs really beautiful~â
âCan you take a picture with me?â
â Youâre looking so bright these days, you know?â
After our class recreation was over, I burned up white.
I probably wonât be doing anything called cross-dressing in the future. â¦â¦
The recreation itself went well because Yamada, who strangely liked cross-dressing, was very enthusiastic, but I was tired â¦â¦.
I sat down on a bench in the plaza to rest as I watched the other classesâ presentations go on and on.
It was a strange feeling to be away from the group.
I had been so afraid of the group, but now that I was in it, I felt I could fit in, even if I was clumsy.
Everyone in my class was removing their makeup and enjoying watching other performances.
Anri was chatting with Tanaka and other classmates. Seeing her natural smile made me happy.
Thinking back, I had stayed in my shell.
Although we were classmates, we went to the same school, but I tried not to get involved with anyone.
I refuse to believe anyone anymore. I really believed that.
What if I had opened up to my classmates in middle school?ãâ¦â¦ Stop thinking about the past. That was my choice to do that. I have no regrets.
Because of my past, I was able to meet even Anri, and I was able to meet my Master and have the opportunity to write a novel.
I hear the sound of small, scraping footsteps.
âAre you tired from doing something youâre not used to?â
Unbeknownst to me, Hirano was standing next to me. Come to think of it, I donât know any of my classmates.
I barely know their names.
âI guess so. Iâm tiredâ¦â¦â
Hirano waits patiently for me to answer. Is he really the same age as me?ãHe looks very dignified.
I thought about it and gave him a short answer.
âI thought it was fun.â
âI see. â¦â¦. Iâm glad to hear that.â
Hiranoâs eyes are looking at Hiratsuka.
âI like Seo. I want her to be happy.â
âHaa?ãHirano?â
I couldnât help but let out a strange voice. I didnât know how to react.
âDonât worry. I donât mean love. Hiratsuka and Seo saved my life.â
I still didnât know how to react.
The quiet Hirano sat down on the bench.
âAs you can see I have a big body and a weak temper. Thatâs whyâ¦â¦ I was made fun of when I was in junior high school.â
When I looked at Hiranoâs face, it was more serious than usual. He was trying to tell me something.
I nodded my head.
Come to think of it, this may be the first time Iâve had such a long conversation with a male student.
I was ready to listen to what he had to say.
âI think the treatment is probably several times worse than Shinjo imagines. They donât care what you do because you are big. They donât care what you say because they donât say anything back. â¦â¦ I hated school and never wanted to go there. Iâve had girls cheat on me and treat me badly.â
I felt like my heart was beating faster. The feeling that only those who have gone through similar experiences can understand.
âBut Hiranoââ
âYes, I had Hiratsuka and Seo.â
Hirano let out a big sigh.
The two were in different classes, but they noticed that something was wrong with me. They pulled me out of school when I was about to leave. Even now,â¦â¦, when I think back to those days, you see, my hands are shaking, right?â
Sweat was dripping down Hiranoâs face, and his hands were definitely shaking.
Hirano grabbed my shoulder with such trembling hands.
âIâm sorry for talking about such a heavy subject during a pleasant time. But I wanted Shinjo to hear it. â¦â¦ We are classmates.â
Hiratsuka and Seo, who are in Hiranoâs line of sight, notice that Hirano is looking at them and wave their hands.
Oh, so this is what it feels like to be friends. Itâs just like me and Anri.
We are feeling the same way.
âThey still canât be honest with each other. All they do is fight.â
Hirano looked kind as he complained.
I thought about what to say. I couldnât find a suitable answer.
Hiratsuka looks like a flirt, but heâs a normal guy.
âYeahâ
âSeo is just a normal girl who canât be honest.â
âYeahâ
âYamada, Tanaka-san and â¦â¦ Saito-san are normal high school students.â
âThatâs right. Theyâre all normal high school students, our classmates.â
I never even tried to look at my classmates from the beginning.
It was self-preservation. I didnât want to get involved with anyone because I didnât want to get hurt. This is why I was unconcerned.
My world was colored by Anri.
I felt as if I recognized my classmates for the first time at this forest school.
I had never seen my classmatesâ faces.
I didnât recognize them as people.
I was only thinking about myself.
I was only vaguely aware of them.
When I looked at my classmates in the group, they all looked happy. I didnât know the names of half of them.
Still, it was different from before. I felt as if I could see them with color. I felt like I could see the emotions of each and every one of them.
Maybe some of the students had gone through more pain than I had.
Yamada is always joking around, but he may have had a hard time in club activities.
Tanaka-san is quiet and may not have fit in with the class.
Hiratsuka might have been disliked because he looks like a flirt.
Everyone is moving forward while suffering.
I looked up and saw Hirano.
Hirano, who looked mild-mannered, had been through a painful experience. But I could not see it.
I thought I was the only one who was suffering. I was a child.
âFinally, youâve seen my face properly. Shinjo, itâs time to take a bath. Letâs go.â
âYeah, sure. Thank you.â
âHmm. I didnât do anything. Weâre classmates.â
The final performance had begun.
It was called âdance time,â and everyone was dancing slowly.
It reminded me of the dance time at the forest school in junior high school.
It was a hard time then, but not now.
When Hirano and I walked into the group, our classmates waved at us and invited us to join them.
It was just that one time, but for some reason I felt my heart warm up.
[Pomeko, Iâm going to take a bath.]
[Yes, itâs a big bath. Iâm looking forward to it because itâs a large communal bath.]
[I canât see you at night because I canât go back and forth â¦â¦]
[Iâll miss you, but letâs have fun at forest school tomorrow!]
[Yeah, Iâll make sure to update my novel.]
[Iâm looking forward to it!]
Before moving to the bath, I exchanged messages with Anri.
It makes me feel warm. My face naturally relaxes.
By the way, I havenât received any e-mail from Saeko. I wonder if the revision is okay?
I heard that the illustrator, Mitobe-sensei, is sending me illustrations at an incredible rate.
Well, I guess it will be all right if I leave it alone.
âShinjo~ Weâre going to be late if we donât get going soon. Hmm, an e-mail. Kaaah!ãYou canât meet her, so youâre texting her, right?ãI know how you feel.â
Yamada is thinking he understands how I feel.
I donât know, I was feeling like I had to think about a lot of things when I was talking to Hirano earlier. â¦â¦
âShut up, Yamada. You and Tanaka-san may be dating, but me and Anri are â¦â¦ friends.â
âHaa?ãWhat are you talking about?!ãT-Tanaka and I are not reallyâ¦.â
Yamadaâs face turns bright red and he starts fidgeting. Iâm a bit uncomfortable. And I havenât removed my makeup.
At that moment, I received a message from Saeko-san.
A call for a further revision of a revision?
I casually open the message.
ââ- W-What, a manga?!ãWhat do you mean, Saeko-san!?ãThat is â¦â¦.â
âWhat going on, whatâs going on?â
âOi, Shinjo, whatâs up?â
âA-Are you okay?â
âWhat about a manga?â
âWhoâs Saeko-san?â
My classmates in the room were surprised at my sudden loud voice.
Saeko-sanâs message said.
[Uhm you know, Mitobe-senseiâs mood got the better of him and he seriously drew a manga based on Nyanta-senseiâs original story. Itâs about â¦â¦100 pages. The senior editor was kind of proud of it, and when he showed it to me, the editor-in-chief said, â¦â¦]
He asked if he could publish a manga based on my novel.
Wait a minute. Iâm certainly happy to comicalize it, but the novel hasnât even been published yet â¦â¦.
I-I should talk to Anri about it!
I send a message to Anri. But no reply comes. No good, sheâs already on her way to the bath.
âPomeko â¦â¦.â
âO-oi, Shinjo, are you crazy?ãPome?ãWhat are you talking about?ãI donât know, but just take a bath and calm down.â
Hiratsukaâs voice brought me back to myself.
It seems that I was distraught.
With my head in a daze, I decided to head for the bath.