6 HOURS AGOÂ 2 COMMENTS
Translator: Soafp
[Still in the past]
After I left Master, I was sitting in the corner of the campfire.
No one was talking to me. Occasionally, I heard my stepsister shouting, but I didnât care.
Shizuka Miyasaki was walking alone with a male student, but I felt nothing.
Kisaragi and her group of girls found me, pointing and laughing, but I donât care.
Nanako was sitting there all alone, but it didnât matter to me.
My head was full of thoughts of writing a novel.
âHey!ãYou look so lonely. Haa. â¦â¦, youâre really screwed if you didnât show up after I invited you. You know, you really should apologize to meâ¦â¦â
Hanazawa-san came to sit next to me.
I donât know. Why is she talking to me at this forest school?
ââ¦â¦ I donât understand.â
âAh right, you know, there are a lot of bad rumors about you, but youâre good at sports, youâre the best student in our grade, youâre tall and you have a beautiful face. Some of the girls are checking to see if the rumors are true. Seriously, youâre like five seconds away from being popular.ãI donât know if you can tell because youâre always picked on in our class. The upperclassmen and underclassmen are talking about you.â
In order not to humiliate my stepmother and stepsister, I keep my appearance neat and tidy.
Studying and exercising perfectly will lessen the negative feelings of my family.
I did what I had to do.
I never thought Iâd be popular.
There is no way I could be popular. Iâm being treated like a criminal.
âItâs not possible. â¦â¦ Iâm too gloomyâ
âWhat?ãYou talked to my sister for a bit. I heard you were normal at that time. You really should stop hiding it. Even Ryuji gets annoyed with you so he messes with you.â
I really donât understand. A little thing can change a personâs evaluation.
Is it just my bad luck?ãNo, wrong. I just keep making the wrong choices.
Iâm worthless.
This girl is just like Nanako.
She just wants to play the role of a good student taking care of me that everyone hates.
Her words have no weight.
âWhy are you trying to talk to me?â
âEh?ãBecause weâre classmates. Besides, I was just curious to see what kind of face you have since my sister was so cute and shy. And did you think I liked you?ãPfft, Iââ
âUhm, about Sakakibara-kun.â
âWhat!?ãS-Seriously!?ãWhy?ãWhat? Eh, youâre lying!ãOh, Ryujiââ
Hanazawa was looking behind me, smiling and waving.
Thatâs when I felt a shock on my back.
âGoh gooh â¦â¦â
âOh, excuse me, youâve been on a roll since this forest school, huh?ãI mean, you should think about your position in the class. Hanazawa is being nice to you, but this is impossible. Iâm really going to hunt you down.â
It seems that I was hit in the back as hard as possible.
It was so sudden that I couldnât breathe properly.
âWait, Ryuji, youâve gone too far. L-Look, itâs forest school, so itâs fine to just be a patsy. Besides, the food was delicious.â
âSo, Hanazawa likes this guy?ãArenât you close to him?ãI was looking forward to going to the forest school with you~. Can I come over to your room afterwards?ãIf I sneak in, I wonât get caught, right?â
âA-ahahaha, seriously?!ãWait, Iâm super happy. â¦â¦. But Shinjo has nothing to do with it. There is no way I would like this gloomy guy. He is just someone just to make fun of. Heâs a real pain in the ass. Heâs so annoying, and he doesnât say anything even when heâs getting his textbooks ripped to shreds. Heâs not a man, you know?â
Hanazawaâs face turned red as she spoke happily. Perhaps she doesnât want to be seen being friendly with me, but sheâs doing her best to deny it.
I wonder if she knows what sheâs doing?ãSheâs looking down at me from above. She doesnât see me as a person. What was the point of what she said just now?
âYouâre really disgusting. I mean, Shinjo, you were with a kid earlier, right?ãAre you a lolicon just because you canât get any attention from your peers?ãIsnât that bad?ãShouldnât I tell everyone about this?ãYou have molested someone before, correct?â
âEh, ah, seriously, â¦â¦?ãAh, I held your hand when we were dancing earlier. Youâre the worstâ¦â
Hanazawaâs voice becomes low. Her gaze changes to one of contempt for me.
Do you really believe in this stuff?ãOh, I see. Thereâs no one who believes me.
I donât feel sad. I just think itâs normal.
âSure, Iâve been talking to her, butââ
âGaââSeriously itâs disgusting!!ãI have a little sister, so itâs really disgusting that this guy is in my class. Isnât that right, Hanazawa~â
âYeah, itâs really creepy â¦â¦. Itâs impossible. Shinjo, are you really a lolicon?â
âOi oi, donât tell Miki. Sheâs interested in him, so sheâs teasing him. Seriously, sheâs got bad taste.â
âWhat? No way. That Miki, right?ãSheâs super cold.â
âLook over there. She says it makes her want to pick on the girl he likes. I can tell sheâs super bothered because I hit him. Do you want me to pick on her too because she is too cocky?â
I couldnât understand what the conversation was about. Toranomon and these guys are supposed to be friends, right?ãSo why would they want to betray someone so easily?
An incomprehensible anger welled up from the bottom of my stomach.
No, anger can ruin a person. I donât need to feel anything.
I take a deep breath.
Itâs okay, my mind is calm.
I see more and more students watching our interaction.
They look at me being bullied and feel a sense of superiority. Itâs true that Toranomon is looking at us with a glare in her eyes.
A group of elementary school students from Shihanâs group were also looking at me.
Master, surrounded by a group of girls, looked down with a look of regret.
I was worried about what they might have done to her. I wanted to rush over there right now.
But that would not solve the problem.
â¦â¦ Iâll be fine, I have a will of steel. I just have to build a wall.
Sakakibara gets up and kicks me lightly in the stomach with his foot.
It doesnât hurt, but it makes me feel very uncomfortable. I feel miserable.
âItâs really creepy. I donât want to sleep next to this guy. You should sleep outside today. Thereâs a nice tree over there, right?ãYou need to cool down for the night. Or should I just have him keep watch? Bring the liquor I brought to the girlsâ room and leave it there. Keep the cigarettes with you, because if they find out, itâs all on you. Seriously, donât get carried away just because Iâm being nice to you todayââ
Sakakibaraâs shoes put mud on my jersey. Sakakibaraâs kicks are getting stronger and stronger.
There was no sign of the teacher coming. Perhaps theyâre having a drink somewhere.
I wonder what the protagonist of a novel does at a time like this.ãWhat kind of story should I write at a time like this?ãIs there a way to stop bullying in a novel?
Ah, if my clothes get dirty, my stepmother will be angry with me. If I get hurt, Iâll have to pay for the hospital. If I break something, Iâll need money.
Sakakibara grabbed me by the chest.
When I looked at Hanazawa, she was looking at Sakakibara with a passionate gaze.
Oh, yeah, these guys donât understand human pain. They donât think that it might come back to them.
âWhat the hell are you doiâgu?â
Violence is absolutely wrong. It will come back to you. Thatâs why, no matter how many times you are told to do something, you must not do it again. However, if I donât show the will to rebel, those girls will continue to bully me. Itâs an affirmation of the bullying.
I was not looking at Sakakibara. I was just imitating Sakakibara and grabbing his chest.
Iâve read a novel about how to grab someoneâs chest. By wrapping the clothes around him, raising your arms high and tightening them with as much force as you can muster.
In the style of these guys, this isâ¦
âThis is a joke, right?ãGrabbing classmates by the chest, kicking them, punching them?â
ââ¦â¦â¦Wha, you, you shady bastard, defy, uuuââ
âIâm just a junior high school student, no different from you. I donât understand why you put a pecking order on me. Why are you violent to students you donât like?ãWhy do you break peopleâs things?ãWhy do you do things that people donât like?â
ââ¦â¦, Haa, youâre a criminal andââ
I almost lost my mind for a moment.
Well, thatâs human nature. Justice with malice.
As I grabbed Sakakibara by the chest and looked around, he couldnât hide his surprise at my sudden defiance.
And Iâm thinking of the rumors about me. The rumor that I was violent at the karaoke box. They probably think that Sakakibara is the victim in this situation and Iâm the violent one. In fact, I was the one who was violated.
Hanazawa shakes my shoulder, almost crying.
âS-Stop it?!ãYouâre going to kill Ryuji!ãHeâs fainting!ãYou know that I like Ryuji, right?ãAnd just because I teased you a littleâ¦â
âI donât care about your feelings. âTeased me?ãNo, this is clear bullying. How long did I have to put up with that?ãRumors about me?ãI donât care about that. You donât really think what youâve been doing to me is teasing, right?ãItâs not just Hanazawa and Sakakibara. Iâm talking to all my classmates. âWhy canât you understand?!â
âI-I know!ãB-But t-there are some things he just canât control!â
âI seeâ¦.in that caseâ-â
I looked around at everyone in the area.
âDONâT EVER GET INVOLVED WITH ME AGAIN!â
I took my hand away from Sakakibaraâs chest, which had been quiet for some time.
Sakakibara collapses to the ground without effort.
The only sound in this place is the sound of the remaining campfire.
No one tried to speak.
I went to the teacher right after that and explained to her about the trouble I had caused.
I explained not only to our homeroom teacher, but also to the relatively sane head of the grade.
The homeroom teacher was desperately trying to deny any bullying, butâ¦
âI-Itâs true what Onii-chan says. Because I understand because Iâve been bullied at school too!â
The teacher came over with a teacher from the elementary school and showed us a video she had recorded on her phone. Master had a scratch on her face. It was a scratch sustained when she fought back against a group of girls who tried to interfere with her filming.
When I told them that I would report the bullying to the police or the board of education, my homeroom teacher looked very pale.
I also found a cigarette in Sakakibaraâs pocket after he passed out. Sakakibara also said that he had brought some liquor with him, so they checked his luggage and found liquor as well.
Sakakibaraâs behavior became a big problem, and they contacted his parents on the spot and decided to temporary suspend him.
I only grabbed him by the chest, but I had to write a letter of remorse for the violence. From the testimony of the other students, it was clear that I was the victim of bullying, and no further blame was placed on me.
I had to spend the rest of the school year in the forest.
I showed them that if you bully, you get bullied back. At the end of the school, my teacher reported to me that the bullying had stopped.
The forest school ended without talking to my classmates.
Master gave me a smile that was appropriate for her age and said goodbye to me with a clear face.
âIâll see you in the rankings someday!ãThank you, Onii-chan!â
Summer vacation is over, and the atmosphere in our class is, to put it mildly, terrible.
The bullying against me has stopped completely. But no one wants to talk to me.
Rumors were spreading that my bad reputation was real. Nanakoâs incident of violence at karaoke had been exaggerated.
It had nothing to do with me. Iâm fine as long as I can spend my days quietly and write novels.
Besides, our homeroom teacher had changed. It was because she knew about the bullying problem but hid it from us. Instead, the relatively decent head of the grade became the homeroom teacher.
Sakakibara goes to school as usual â¦â¦. For a while, Sakakibara stopped coming to school, but with the help of Hanazawa and Toranomon, he gradually regained his normality. He doesnât have the same centripetal force as before.
When he sees me, he doesnât even look at me, as if heâs recalling the memory of being choked up.
Thatâs just the way it is in junior high school. I thought that maybe he would resent me, but he didnât. Occasionally, I would see Sakakibara being teased. He was smiling, but he looked disgusted, which made an impression on me.
Hanazawa was still trying to talk to me. I ignored her, and she gradually stopped trying to talk to me.
From time to time, I could feel Toranomon staring at me, but it didnât matter to me.
I donât think Iâll ever speak to these guys again.
Apparently, the head of the school had been told that three other students had been harassing me.
The three of them have been spending their days in class looking uncomfortable.
There were only a few days left until graduation.
I was called to the back of the school building by a letter.
âS-Shinjo, Iâve had my eye on you for a while now. â¦â¦ I know the bad rumors are lies. â¦â¦ I did my research!!ãI-Iâm clumsy, so I messed with the girls you like.â¦â¦ Iâm sorry for what Iâve done. â¦â¦ Iâm sorry. âI-I want you to go out with me. â¦â¦â
âIâm sorry, itâs too late to apologize now. Iâm not going out with anyone because of my family situation. Thenââ
âAh, â¦â¦, thatâs right. I-I bullied you. â¦â¦â
âNo, itâs simply because Iâm not attractive.â
ââ¦â¦â¦â¦Eh â¦â¦â¦â¦. Higgghhh â¦â¦, ugh, Good byâ-â
Toranomon runs off, crying and screaming with a red face. I donât care about these false confessions. Her words are light, just like Hanazawaâs.
The head of the school year came out of the corner.
âO-oi, I donât care how many false accusations have been made, Iâm not going to stand for a confession. â¦â¦â
âNo, if you donât do this, theyâll say I spoke out of turn. Thank you for your time.â
âY-yeah, Iâll help you with that. Honestly, why donât you have a little trust in people?â
âTrust?ãThatâs right, â¦â¦. I hope I can find someone like that someday.â
âOh, wait a minute, Shinjo, listen to me!â
I didnât expect that I would receive a series of false confessions after this.
On the way home after I left the teacher.
Hanazawa was waiting for me in front of the park.
âAh, ehehe, Iâve been waiting for you, Shinjo. Y-you know. I was nice to Shinjo at the forest school, remember?ãI liked Shinjo from that time. â¦â¦ To be honest, I like your coolness. You should go out with me.â
I couldnât help but wrinkle my brow.
Iâm not going to let something like this upset my emotions.
âEh-uhm, I thought Hanazawa was dating Sakakibara-kun?â
âEh, ah, yeah. That was a long time ago. That lame guy is just a friend. â¦â¦ Hey, w- what do you think of me?ãI think youâre pretty cool. â¦â¦â
I let out a sigh and start walking.
Itâs worse than Toranomon.
âHey, wait for me!!!â
Hanazawa tried to grab my hand. I canât let that happen. I donât want to be attacked by nausea again.
It reminds me of the bus at the forest school. I ducked Hanazawaâs hand again.
Hanazawa was stunned.
I let out a few words in an unexpectedly rough tone.
ââ-I told you that time. Donât ever get involved with me again. Please donât give me a false confession. â¦â¦ Goodbye.â
Hanazawa kept saying in a voice mixed with sobs, âIâm sorry, Iâm sorry for bullying you, Iâm sorryââ. But I have a will of steel. I wonât be fooled by such words. I canât trust people.
I took one cold look at the sobbing Hanazawa and walked towards home.
My stepmother and stepsister are not here today. So Iâm going to write a novel.
Iâve finally reached the âNo. 1 rankingâ that Master had told me about back then.
I keep writing novels to fill the gaps in my heart.
Itâs the only thing that can save me.
[Present]
A past I donât want to remember. But I needed to look at it again in order to move forward.
I guess Iâve changed a little since then. I wonder if I will be able to enjoy the forest school.
âThank you very much!ãI look forward to seeing you again!!â
I walked out of the building and became sentimental.
The wall that I thought was unbreakable was broken down by Anri.
Anri has healed the wounds in my heart that I thought would never heal.
My life, which I thought would never change, has been colored by Anri.
My phone vibrated.
I quickly checked the message and saw that Anri had arrived at the station.
I couldnât wait to see her, so I started running towards the station.
âI want to see Anri. I couldnât stop the feeling.
I ran, and ran, and kept running.
Suddenly, I remembered what Dojima had said. Itâs true that running makes you forget all the unpleasant things and feel refreshed.
I found Anri waiting for me in front of the station.
Just the sight of Anri makes my heart skip a beat.
Anri noticed me and waved her hand.
The gesture was so endearing â¦â¦ that I almost lost control of my mind.
âHuh? Makoto, did you come running?ãYou should have come slowly. Ehehe, letâs talk a lot today!â
I didnât know what to sayâ¦.
I hugged Anri.
âE-Eeh!?ãMakoto!?ãW-Whatâs wrong?ãDid you have a bad day?â
ââ¦â¦ I finally met Anri. Thank you â¦â¦.â
Anri smiled and hugged me back without saying a word.
I couldnât trust anyone, but I miraculously met someone who was very important to me.
As I thought.
âIâm in love with Anri.
End of volume 6?