"You think they feel like I'm one of them yet?"
"Maybe not, but most of 'em take awhile to get used to new members." You pat Kieran's arm. "If it helps matters, you've weaseled your way into my heart, O'Driscoll."
The impact of the scowl on his face is lessened by the dark blush that now adorns it, with Kieran turning away so you can't tease him. You don't need to see his face to know that you've made him flustered, it's been the same thing you've done to him since he became one with the group. He appreciated your company, as you were just about the only one who was truly nice to him, but he wished you didn't flirt with him so often. You were getting his hopes up that you might actually have a thing for him.
But you were among a gang of criminals, so he assumed you were just trying to con him out of something.
What could you actually get from him? Nothing, he thought, so he's not sure why you bothered. But he wouldn't complain in fear that you might back of, that he might not get to enjoy conversations or fishing trips with you anymore. You had to fight with some of the older members of the gang over going fishing with him alone, since it was fresh off his 'probation' among them where he was actually allowed to leave the camp, but you were nothing if not extremely stubborn. When you came back in one piece and with fish, he thinks that they started to trust him the slightest bit more.
A camp party begins after a decent score comes through, everyone in the group always finding whatever reason there was to drink. You don't always drink but tonight you felt like letting loose, especially after Kieran rejects your offer to come drink with you. He was always so anxious around the others, afraid to stop working just in case he's declared useless and turned to the wild. You wouldn't let them do that to him, and if they did, you'd be going with them. You thought Kieran had done more than enough to prove that he belonged among the lot of you, and it was beginning to become annoying to see him bullied (now, good old-fashioned sarcasm and jabs? Those were fine. Everyone got testy with each other once in a while).
"You think he likes me?" You always get emotional while you drink, things you normally kept under the surface bubbling up uncomfortably and unable to leave your thoughts. Karen knows what you're talking about without you even having to specify, with her simply shrugging her shoulders in response.
"He'd be a fool not to."
He didn't have to like you, of course, but you think you really liked him. You had been the one to give him advice to sell out the O'Driscoll's, you had been the one to support him joining the gang, you'd been the one flirting with him since the very start, and, you were confident to say, knew him more than anyone else around here. You had just found him interesting, once he was finally able to hold a conversation with you, and you never suspected you'd develop genuine feelings for him.
It bothers you through the night that you can't figure out whether Kieran liked you or not; you'd seen him interact with Mary-Beth, too, even calling her pretty once. She was pretty, of course, but he'd never said that to you. It was stupid to be upset over something so miniscule, jealous over a simple interaction when you spent the most time with him, but you realized, you were always the one to approach him first. It's not as though he ever approached you specifically to ask if you'd like to go fishing with him, or anything like that, but then again, you were always on top of it.
Another thing about alcohol is that it made you confrontational, something you generally tried to avoid unless absolutely needed. You put down your finished beer and decided your thoughts weren't going to exert their power over you, you were just going to seek out an answer. What if it wasn't what you wanted? Well then, you'd stop flirting and bothering with him, then! If he couldn't appreciate you for who you were, then why waste your time on him? You knew it wouldn't be as simple as that, especially because the minute you thought about no longer interacting with Kieran a dull ache spread across your chest.
You find him over by the stables, talking softly to the horses and brushing them off, making sure they were comfortable before he turned in for the night. It was completely dark outside now, and you were far enough away from camp that no one would see the two of you out there. You'd rather not be questioned on why you were both alone outside of camp, in the dark, so once you approach Kieran, you point towards the words a few feet away.
"What-?" He looks bewildered as you push him, leading him off to a secluded place so the horses couldn't watch and judge you. You know you smelled like alcohol and you had to look pretty scary, too, because Kieran looked like he was damn near ready to piss himself.
"Do you like me, Kieran?" Your hand rests on his chest, keeping him up against the tree you had him pinned to. "Or do you just put up with me so that no one 'round here will shoot you?"
It made you sad to think that he might feel pressured to spend his time with you, and it'd taken you this long to see it; you had a lot of power over him, since you were well-liked among the gang, which made the dynamic between you and Kieran off-balance. He would probably be afraid to reject you, since you were the one always hitting on him and telling him to do chores with you, it was all starting to feel futile now. How could you make him feel comfortable enough to tell you the truth?
"You don't gotta like me, you know." You look away from his face, which had turned from frightened to curious now. "I always had a soft spot for ya. Felt really bad about what they did but we had to be real sure you were tellin' us the truth. You're really cute, Kieran, and very kissable, and I just need you to- to tell me, how you feel..."
"I-I like you." He says it too quietly, and you tilt your head to the side, looking at him through tired, half-lidded eyes. Were you hallucinating and hearing what you wanted, or did you miss a word in his sentence? Did he say he liked you?
"What was that? Couldn't hear you, sorry. Bein' drunk kinda-" You feel your heart soar as you're cut off mid-sentence, Kieran's lips pressing hard against yours to silence you. You let out a happy moan of approval, quickly dominating Kieran, who submitted to you without much complaint; he was making his point to you, he did indeed enjoy kissing you, spending time with you, because why wouldn't he? You were just far better at being straight-forward about what you wanted, and he was too nervous to be forward with you.
You spend a few wonderful minutes with Kieran behind that tree, not letting it go too far, but letting him know you'd be more than open to the idea when you weren't drunk. He gains a little more confidence now, hands running down your side, stroking your hair, pulling you back in for more just as you pull away. You enjoy this, the feeling of being wanted, the warmth of another person, but you know it can't last for long, as the others would notice your absence soon enough.
"You think you can walk me back to my bed? I might get lost." You giggle into your hand as Kieran nods his head, giving a small smile.
"I think I can do that for you, Miss. This way."
You must've been more drunk then you realized because your legs wobbled as you walked back into camp, and Kieran had to do most of the work, having you lean on him as he lead the way. Luckily, you make it back to your bed without incident, and you even considered inviting Kieran to join you, even if you knew he'd never. But you're so tired you can't even muster up the energy to flirt, quietly thanking him with a kiss on the cheek before flopping onto your bedroll and rolling yourself into the blanket you had. Kieran watches you get comfortable before he heads back to the horses, wanting to finish up what he'd been doing before you interrupted so he could go to bed, too.
There really hadn't been anything for you to worry about, but tomorrow, you did plan on asking why he hasn't called you pretty yet.