506 Pain And Anguish
Eun-sun laid in Dan-Hanâs arms with her eyes closed pretending to sleep, but sleep was nowhere close to her eyes.
There was an abundance of sadness in her heart, and it was churning within her stomach, but she had no idea what to do about it.
It felt like a boulder was lodged in the depth of her heart, and it was weighing her down, tightly clenching her heart and sending cold jolts of pain over her nerve endings.
Eun-sun was in a wild desperation for an escape from the heaviness and pain in her heart, and as much as she wanted to close her eyes and wish it all away, her heart was too heavy to let it happen to her.
She felt choked. She wanted it all out, but she had no idea how to let it out of her...out of her chest. And even if she did, she couldnât do it because of Dan-Han.
He was laying down beside her, giving her whatever comfort he could offer, while he was in need of same.
Dan-Han was remarkably tough, but he had a weakness and that was their love for one another.
Eun-sun couldnât bear to see him cry or wallow in self-blame like he did a while ago. It would break her heart more than it already was. So for his sake, sheâd keep it in as much as she could.
A soft knock rapped on the door, and while she heard it, she remained still.
.....
âCome in,â Dan-Han said, and Mi-Cha poked her head into the room. Her gaze fell on Eun-sun peacefully lying in Dan-Hanâs arms, and Dan-Han followed her gaze.
âIs she awake?â Mi-Cha softly asked in a whisper, but before Dan-Han could answer, Eun-sunâs voice came up.
âMi-Cha?â She called, slowly raising her head towards the head poking into the room.
Mi-Cha turned away and looked behind her, âSheâs awake.â She announced before fully opening the door.
Dan-Han glanced at Eun-sun and silently peered at her face. Eun-sun couldnât tell the emotion in his eyes, but if he knew she had been pretending to be asleep, he didnât show it.
He turned his gaze towards the door when Mi-Cha stepped into the room with a their parents following behind her.
âMom, Dad?â Eun-sun called out.
Sena hurried to her side and firmly gripped her hand. She cupped her cheek and fondly kissed her.
âHoney, are you feeling? Are you in pain?â She worriedly asked, concern gleaming in her eyes.
Eun-sun pushed forward a smile and shook her head, while placing her free hand on her motherâs for a gentle pat. âIâm fine, mom. Truly.â Eun-sun assured her, but the skeptical look on her motherâs face told her she didnât believe her.
Senaâs eyes glimmered with motherly affection as she brushed her hand through down her hair. âTell me the truth honey. Are you really okay?ân/o/vel/b//in dot c//om
Was she truly okay? Eun-sun knew that question wasnât just about the physical pain she was feeling, but about the baby she had lost.
Her lips threatened to tremble, but she bit them and smiled even brighter. âIâm okay, mom. Really okay.â She told her before shifting her gaze towards Mi-Cha who had a replica of the worried look on their motherâs face.
âMi-Cha, are you okay? Where you hurt?â Eun-sun questioned, but Mi-Cha shook her head.
âIâm fine.â She softly replied, but the guilt and pity in her voice were audible to Eun-sun, and so were the sadness in her eyes.
Eun-sun could guess the thoughts going through her head at the moment. She could imagine Mi-Cha blaming herself again for her misfortune, but it wasnât truly hers.
She wasnât at fault for any of this.
But as much as Eun-sun wanted to tell her this, she couldnât, because just the thought of her baby brought that uncomfortable squeeze in her chest.
Eun-sun shifted her gaze to her father, who was silently staring at her, but was equally as worried as her mother, if not more. He seemed like he had aged a few years in one night.
The frown lines on their faces was evident of the worries they had for her, and she didnât want that. She didnât want them to worry about her, but could she?
Could she really stop them from worrying?
They were her parents and family, and worrying was every parents inherent gift. Just like it was already becoming hers.
What if she canât protect this baby? What if she lost this one too?
Eun-sunâs mind was slowly drifting back to her pregnancy, but she quickly pushed it out of her mind.
She flashed a smile at at her father as she stretched out her hand to him, which he promptly received. She looked at them and pushed her lips wider to force an even brighter smile.
âIâm really fine. You all donât have to worry.â She assured them. âYou guys just have to stop frowning.â She softly scolded, but while everyone nodded at her, they all knew she was far from fine.
âWe brought you food.â Sena suddenly announced, wanting to shift the dreary atmosphere. âThe doctor gave us a list of things you should eat for now till you get better, so I brought some.â Sena said bringing forward the bags she had brought in, and Mi-Cha helped her unpack them.
Sena looked over at Dan-Han. âDan-Han, you should eat too.â She told him.
Dan-Han has been at the hospital since the moment he was released, and had been waiting by Eun-sunâs side.
âIâll eat later, just let her eat.â He said, while Eun-sun arched a brow at him.
âWhy? Youâre not hungry? You havenât eaten since you were released, right?â She questioned, and he shook his head.
Dan-Han gently smiled as he brushed his hand down the length of her hair. âIâll feel better if you eat first, and I have to step out. Iâll be back shortly.â He told her, but Eun-Sun caught onto his sleeve.
âBut where are you going?â She questioned, her eyes anxiously gazing at him.
Dan-Han caught the glint of worry in her eyes. He resignedly sighed as he leaned back and pelted her forehead with an assuring kiss. âI just want to make a call. Iâm not leaving you. Iâll be outside, so donât worry.â He reassured her.
He knew the reason behind her anxiety, and he perfectly understood. She was scared.
Eun-sun wasnât convinced about his reason for leaving, because for some reason she didnât trust his words, nevertheless, she stiffly nodded.
Dan-Han smiled and kissed her cheek. âGood girl.â He said and stepped down from the bed.
Eun-sun watched as he sauntered towards the door and out of the room. His shoulders were unusually tensed and high, and she could tell he wasnât okay.
She also wasnât okay. They had both lost a child which they never got to know of its existence till she lost it.
âHoney, here take the spoon.â Sena said, putting the spoon into her hand, but Eun-sun couldnât hold it. Her hand was trembling and when she looked at down it, she realized her vision was hazy.
A bead of tears fell from her eyes and then another, and even more followed.
âEun-sun, why are you crying?â Sena asked in a tearful voice, but Eun-sun couldnât give an answer.
Her lips trembled so badly, but that came from them was a groan of pain.
âOh dear,â Sena cried as she put her hands around her and tightly hugged her.
There was no doubt about why she was crying. Sena had once experienced it herself. The feeling of losing a child that could have been a great part of ones life was indescribable.
It might have been a foetus, but it was Eun-sunâs child nonetheless. One she would have gladly carried with love, and that she lost it in a painful way made it even more hurtful.
âBaby, youâre gonna be alright.â Sena comforted her, while Ki-Jun patted her hand.
âD...Dan-Han,â Eun-sun stuttered amidst tears, and Sena hugged her even tighter.
âDan-Han is going to be just fine. You both are. If not for yourself, you have to do it for your other baby, Eun-sun. Please stop crying.â
âSis, stop crying. Itâs going to be fine.â Mi-Cha also tried to comfort her, but her own tears were also flowing.
She couldnât help but blame herself. If only she hadnât been stupid, Eun-sun and her babies would have been fine. They wouldnât be in this condition right now.
Outside the door, Dan-Han stood with his hands clenched tightly at his side, as he listened to Eun-sun cry.
He knew Eun-sun had been pretending to sleep all along, simply to keep the pain away from him. She might not have known it, but her body had been so stiff in his arms.
He knew how much she was hurting, and how desperately she was trying to keep it all in because of him.
Eun-sun was one person he knew well. She was the woman he loved and would spend the rest of his life with, so he yes, he knew her well.
Sheâd rather burn and drown in her own pain, than let him take the blame for things.
He didnât want to leave her, and while it was a tough decision, he knew it had to be done.
She had to let it all out. She had to breathe.
And for every tear she was shedding now, heâd make the people behind it shed a thousand more.
Yong-Gun would wish to die an easy and quick death, but he wouldnât have it. Yong-Gun had done so much to Eun-sun that even death was too much mercy for him.
Every ordeal Eun-sun had been through since her birth had all been because of him. And even now he had to take their child just the same way he took her from her parents.
Dan-Hanâs felt his hands clench even more till his nails were digging into his palms.
He whipped out his phone and dialled a number.
âWhen will they be indicted?â He questioned the moment the call was answered.
âThe first hearing is tomorrow, the second ââ
âI want the case concluded by the second hearing.â
âBut president Lee,â
âI want him dead before he steps into his prison cell.â He growled.
âYes, sir.â The person on the other side of the phone echoed and Dan-Han ended the call.
Dan-Han had only just ended the call, when he heard someone call his name.
He looked over to his right and he saw Ni-Na hurrying up to him, and following behind was her parents and his father.
What was he doing there?
.....