Chapter 15: Chapter 15

LEXI

“Hi Josh.” Lexi offered him a pleasant smile. This man had done nothing wrong to her, and it would be unfair for her to treat him badly because she was currently upset at his friend.

“Hi Lexi, I hope you don’t mind me ordering for you,” he said with a smile. “Daniel told me what kind of donuts you like.”

Lexi bit her lip to prevent her eyes from rolling. Once again Daniel had to prove he was like a ~god~ in her world. He could find out anything he wanted about her.

The feeling of annoyance sank deeper into her bones.

“I wouldn’t be surprised if you told me he knows where I’ve been all day. I brushed off our meeting this morning, even brushed off my run-in with his employee today. But this coincidence is too grand.”

Lexi wasn’t in the mood for games; she certainly didn’t feel like beating around the bush. “Billionaires like you use Pete’s Coffee and Starbucks, not Dunkin Donuts. What are you really doing here?”

“Okay, you caught me. He asked me to keep an eye on you, which I gladly did because I’ve never seen him so invested in anyone.”

As the words traveled to Lexi’s brain, Josh paid the bill, picked up their trays, and walked to an empty table at the back. She followed him quietly.

“I know this must seem weird to you, but I promise I’m being truthful. My friend is the king of manwhores, I admit, but I can honestly say he’s never felt bad about his behavior until he met you.”

Josh took a bite of his donut. “For the first time in his life, he’s been hesitating, and he never hesitates. He’s never cared to find out anything about any girl he’s seen except their medical history. Sometimes he wouldn’t even remember their names.”

Lexi stared at her donut and chocolate shake. She wasn’t sure what to say, so she just sat there, quietly taking it all in.

“You’ve made more progress in one night than I have in a decade… I’ve never seen him that happy.”

Josh was clearly being sincere, but Lexi wasn’t sure he knew what he was seeing.

She tried to find a careful way to word her response, but in the end, she blurted the first words that came to mind. “He was only pretending to be happy. He only asked me to go so he could rub it in your face that he wasn’t a shallow prick who only dates models and easy women.”

“I know,” Josh whispered with a smile.

This shocked her.

“What do you mean you know?” she asked, frowning.

Josh chuckled. “Dani came to see me this morning after he saw you and told me everything. Believe me, I scolded him for over an hour.”

“So, if you know the truth, why are you here? Why are you saying this? Daniel doesn’t give a shit about me or anyone else for that matter. He sent me a picture of a woman sucking him off last night. Does that sound like someone who’s changing?”

Josh chuckled again.

“I know, I know. Like I said, he told me everything…” He took a deep breath. “It was an old photo. Dani didn’t sleep with anyone last night. He had every intention of doing that, but he couldn’t.”

Josh obviously didn’t care about bro code. He continued to tell her everything. “He went back to his office and spent the entire night trying to track down the naked picture you sent him. He was really stressed out when he thought it was real. It was so obvious that he didn’t sleep when I saw him this morning.”

Lexi finally reached for her donut. The sudden revelations made her oddly uncomfortable, and eating gave her something to do with her hands and mouth.

She was washing down a piece of donut with the chocolate shake when Josh said, “Have dinner with us. No pretenses, just dinner.”

He clearly didn’t beat around the bush either.

“Does he know you’re here talking to me?” Lexi was immediately angry at herself for asking that question, but what was done was done.

“No. He’s in denial, actually. He thinks he’s only interested because you rejected him; to him, you’re a challenge, one he wants to conquer. That’s his excuse at the moment, but I know different.”

“How do you know that’s not what’s happening?”

“Because I watched him with you last night. He might have been pretending for a while, but there were moments when he wasn’t acting at all. He felt something, and so did you. You’ll be lying to me right now if you say you didn’t.”

Josh apparently came to make his point, and he wasted no time in doing so. Forget about easing her into it.

Lexi glared at him. “I’m working tonight,” she said matter-of-factly.

“What time do you have to be there?”

“Seriously, Josh, I don’t like your friend. He’s an asshole. I’ve never had a real boyfriend in my life, and I don’t think the first man I give my heart and body to should be someone like him. That would probably be the worst decision I could ever make.”

“So, you don’t feel anything?” Josh asked with a smirk.

The bastard knew what he was doing. Like a detective playing good cop to coax all the information out of you.

Lexi sighed heavily. “I was pretending last night. I did what he asked me to do, then I went home. End of story.”

Josh laughed out loud. “Okay, I guess I’m wasting my time then. Maybe I should see if I can salvage his relationship with his assistant. Poor thing is in love with him…”

A loud buzzing sound took over Lexi’s ears. The volume increased until there was nothing but a blood-popping ache.

~His assistant? Ms. Abortion?~

Patient confidentiality suddenly became a foreign concept. “He got that baby-killing bitch pregnant, didn’t he?”

Josh’s eyes widened. “How do you know that? I never said that.”

“I saw her today at my friend’s clinic.” Lexi felt like throwing up. Any rational thought she might have had up until this point had disappeared.

“You saw Gloria? How did you even know it was her? That’s too much of a coincidence.”

Barely listening, Lexi covered her mouth with her right hand, rose to her feet, and bolted to the bathroom. Stomach acid, mixed with flavored bits of food, painfully rushed out into the toilet. She threw up for five minutes straight until there was nothing left but the sound of her coughing and spitting profusely.

When Lexi finally went to the sink, her throat burned. Her face was so red that it didn’t match the rest of her pale body. She washed her mouth with water several times, then washed her face.

Standing in front of the mirror, Lexi battled with questions she knew she should not be concerned with.

~He got her pregnant.~

~Does he know?~

~Did he tell her to do it?~

~Did he force her?~

~Did she want to do it?~

~Does he love her?~

~Does she love him?~

~How long has this been going on?~

~And what the hell does he want from me?~

Daniel wasn’t her real boyfriend, but she couldn’t help but feel as if she’d been cheated on. It was mad. Crazy. But that’s the way she felt. Disgusted enough to throw up in a public bathroom, a place she always avoided. She would usually hold her pee until she got home.

Lexi leaned against the sink, trying to clear her thoughts and ignore the rancid public bathroom smell that suddenly invaded her nostrils. The urge to throw up again was strong.

She held her breath for a few seconds, then released it. The action helped a bit, but not enough.

~Why am I so upset? He isn’t my boyfriend; I’m not his girlfriend. I know this. I also know that who he sleeps with is none of my business, and yet I still want to kill him.~

After about ten minutes, Lexi washed her mouth and face again and left the bathroom. When she saw the table she’d abandoned, Josh was no longer alone. Daniel was sitting next to him, looking like he just left a photoshoot.

His suit fit perfectly, his hair was pushed back, and his intimidating eyes bore into her. It felt like acupuncture needles on her clit—painful with a hint of satisfaction.

Lexi hated the feeling in her chest every time she saw him. Every time she looked into his stupid eyes, she swooned. Every time he spoke, she felt weak at the knees. Every time he touched her, she trembled like a leaf in fall.

~I’d rather walk up a steep hill with twenty stones in my backpack than let that jerk think I’m jealous.~ Those words kept her sane as she made her way over to them.

Lexi was even bold enough to smile at Daniel before sitting next to him. “Hello lover,” she said with a straight face.

Daniel was so shocked he couldn’t speak.

Lexi reached for her purse and pulled out her cell phone to check the time.

“I have to go home now. I have homework to do, and then I have to get ready for work.”

Josh nodded, but Daniel was still speechless.

Lexi used the opportunity to mess with him. “You want to give me a ride home? If you don’t, it’ll only prove that you’re a bigger ass than I thought, and I will never let you get close to me again.”

She thought for sure Daniel would ignore her or say something ridiculous and mean, fitting to his character. But instead, he said, “Let’s go.”

Daniel pushed Lexi gently so she’d stand, and then he placed his big hand around her wrist. He squeezed tightly as he pulled her out of the eating establishment.

Lexi had to run to keep up with him.

At his car, Daniel dropped her hand. He placed his thumb against the door of the SUV and unlocked it. “Get in.”

He walked around to the driver’s side, and she climbed in gracefully.

“I wasn’t serious about the ride, Daniel,” Lexi said without looking at him. She decided it was safer to stare at the dashboard. “I can take the bus.”

He pushed the start button on the car but made no attempt to leave the parking lot. “Josh told me you saw Gloria today.”

Lexi put her seatbelt on and contemplated what to say. After a minute, she replied softly, “Yes, she came to the clinic I volunteer at. We didn’t speak to each other or anything. But when he mentioned that you two were a…~thing…~I put two and two together.”

The air in the car was so tense Lexi was sure she would suffocate if she held her breath for even two seconds.

“Is that why you won’t look at me? Because I slept with her? Or you won’t look at me because she had an abortion?”

“Honestly, all of the above.”

Daniel chuckled, and Lexi had no idea what to make of that response.

The car ride was quiet. Many times, she attempted to speak but decided against it. All she could do was listen to the hum of the engine, the wheels turning on the asphalt, and watch other vehicles drive by.

Finally, Daniel parked outside her building. Lexi unfastened her seatbelt and attempted to open the door.

The sound of the locks turning made her jump.

“I’ve never said this out loud to anyone before,” Daniel began in a voice Lexi had never heard. It was so soft her heart wanted to leap out of her chest and run toward it.

“I always thought that if I wasn’t born, I wouldn’t have met my mother. If I didn’t meet her, I wouldn’t love her. If I didn’t love her, I wouldn’t lose her. And if I didn’t lose her…I wouldn’t miss her. I blame one thing on the other, and the cycle continues.

“There are so many shitty women in this world, men too, people who’ve raped and murdered innocent people, and yet they didn’t die. They’re still walking around, fucking people’s lives up, and my mother, who never did anything wrong, died horribly. How is that fair?”

Lexi turned to face him. The look in Daniel’s eyes was so full of pain that she had to look away before it dug a hole right through her heart.

“I figured bad people live longer. If you have nothing to care about, you’ll never be hurt. And that’s the way I chose to live my life. The women who I’ve been with all agreed on this before anything happened.

“To be honest, it was only two women who ever got pregnant, and that was their fault because they refused to go on birth control… They both said something about not wanting to get fat. I don’t know what that has to do with anything, but that’s the truth.

“I’ve never, ever in my life explained myself to anyone. Or forced anyone to do anything they didn’t want to do.”

Lexi felt Daniel looking at her, demanding that she face him, so she did. With their eyes locked, he said, “For some reason, I don’t want you to hate me.”

She sighed softly and leaned back into the leather seat. For once, there was no noise happening in her head; the ranting from earlier had disappeared. It was as if her subconscious had accepted this man or something. ~Dammit!~

After a minute of silence, Daniel added, “I don’t expect you to understand, but I chose to explain it to you anyway.”

Lexi sighed again, turning her head so she could see his eyes. Something in her stomach flipped as soon as his handsome face came into view.

“I get it,” she whispered softly, trying to ignore the way his eyes lit up at those three simple words. “But I don’t agree with it.”

“I know,” he said with a nod.

“If you asked me what kindergarten was like,” Lexi started, “I couldn’t tell you. If you asked me what elementary was like, I couldn’t tell you either because I never went.”

Usually, she had a handle on her emotions. Had it under control. But today was different. She decided to talk about her past—with ~him~ of all people.

“My mother was a drug addict. She loved it so much that she didn’t care about anything else. Not even me.”

Lexi paused to take a deep breath.

“The house we lived in lost power so many times that I got used to the cold darkness at night and the scorching heat during the day.” She paused again as the memories resurfaced. “There was no refrigerator, so I would drink straight from the tap. We didn’t have furniture, didn’t have blankets. We slept on a pile of clothes that smelled of mildew and dust.”

A tear burned her eyes, rolled down her cheek.

“I remember the men, though. She had plenty. Different ages and sizes. Different races too. I remember sometimes they’d bring food. Sometimes they’d acknowledge me; sometimes they wouldn’t. You can imagine how many times I saw a naked man fucking my mother. And the stupid look on their faces when they were through.

“Sometimes I would be there alone; sometimes she would be there but ignore me completely. The last time I saw her leave the house, she never came back. I don’t remember how many days she was gone before I realized I was permanently abandoned. I was so young, so small, so hungry. I was desperate enough to crawl next door and beg a neighbor I’d never even met for food.”

That memory made Lexi’s tears flow harder. She used the back of her hand to wipe them away.

“That neighbor called Child Services, and they came and took me to the hospital. I remember waking up with a drip in both arms.”

She dried her eyes and looked at him.

“My mother was an awful, selfish woman, but I don’t hate her. I don’t hate everyone I meet because my mother treated me like shit. I still respect people even after everything I’ve been through. At least she gave me a chance to survive; she didn’t abort me.

“That’s why I hate it so much. If a woman like that didn’t think to kill me in her womb, how can I support the people who do it like it’s no big deal?”

Lexi watched Daniel swallow as if he had an acidic taste in his mouth.

“I get it,” he finally managed. “I understand how you feel, and I’m sorry you went through that.”

She offered him a smile, then reached for her bag. “No worries. I’m sorry too. I didn’t mean to judge you or the women you sleep with. It’s my own personal feelings, and those feelings shouldn’t interfere with the way you choose to live your life.”

Another minute of silence passed. Lexi checked the time on her cell. “I have to go now. I have school stuff to finish, then I have to get ready for work.”

Daniel hesitated for another moment, but then he finally pressed a button to unlock the doors.

“Maybe I’ll stop by later. I like the night life at Maker’s,” he said, though he looked insincere for the first time since he told her about his mother.

Lexi smiled. “Okay. Just don’t scold me if I make drinks you don’t like.”

“Don’t worry, Ms. Fox. I’ll stick to wine to be safe.”

Daniel chuckled, and Lexi’s smile widened.

“Bye then,” she said as she climbed out.

She closed the door behind her. After she walked away and was safely inside, he slowly drove away.