LEXI
When she returned from the fundraiser, Lexi locked herself in her room to contemplate the events of the night.
The cab ride home was the longest forty-five minutes of her life. She kept checking the meter machine, stomping her feet, and checking her phone, wishing she had a date or was workingâanything to get her mind off ~him~.
~I did everything Reece told me to do, I said everything she told me to say, and it worked like a charm. So, why do I feel so crappy? Itâs not like I wanted to see him again anyway⦠Or do I?~
~No, no, no! I donât.~
~Whatâs the use? He only wanted me to stay because I looked like a movie star tonight. ~
Now all Lexiâs glamour was washed away. She was curled up in bed wearing her favorite Mickey Mouse T-shirt and Hanes socks. Her neatly done hair was now messy, and her makeup was gone. She looked plain again, and she had to admit that she missed looking in the mirror and not recognizing herself.
~I guess I really do have an alter ego. ~
Lexi showed up to the fundraiser with so much confidence and sarcasm that it actually shocked her. She didnât know where all that bravery and sass came from, but she wished she always felt so in tune with her body and herself.
Just then, there was a firm knock on Lexiâs bedroom door. She scampered out of bed to open it.
Reece was dressed for a nightclub, wearing black boots, a short, skin-tight dress, perfectly applied makeup, and a really cute clutch purse.
âYou look great,â Lexi complimented her, staring at her best friendâs cheek so that she wouldnât stare down at her cleavage.
âItâs not too late to change your mind and come with me,â Reece said. âYou did so well tonight⦠I finally got you out of your shell. Why would you want to crawl right back in?â
~Iâm depressed about the fact that Iâve never been on a real date. Iâm even more annoyed that in the future I will compare my real boyfriend to the fake billionaire boyfriend who moved me across the dance floor. How messed up is that?~
Lexi wanted something real in the future. Someone real. She didnât see how going clubbing, getting drunk, and flirting with a pervert would help her achieve any of those things.
âNo, thanks. Go have fun⦠Iâm just a little tired. Besides, tomorrowâs Monday, so I have to wake up early for school, then the clinic, then work in the evening.â
The owner of Makerâs must have received a referral from Reece or ~that guy~ today because on her way home from the fundraiser, Lexi received a text with her work schedule for the next week.
Reece nodded and hugged Lexi, then left. Lexi headed to the kitchen for ice cream and leftover chocolate cake.
~What is it with girls? We eat junk food and watch chick flicks whenever weâre stressed about something. I guess the extra energy from all those sweet and salty foods allows us to cope with the setbacks in life.~
Lexi decided to put on ~Cinderella~ for the thousandth time. She knew all the songs, every characterâs lines, and yet every time she watched it, she was just as impressed as the first time. She knew it was just a cartoon, but it was also a classicâand classics never get old. She hoped to enjoy watching it with her own daughter one day.
Lexiâs subconscious replied, ~You have to get a man and have sex first.~
She rolled her eyes and picked up her phone.
It had been over half an hour since Lexi got home, and she couldnât help but wonder if Daniel was okay. Now that she was back to normal and Reece had left, questions she shouldnât be concerned with crossed her mind. ~Was I too hard? Should I call to check on him?~
As if Daniel had a direct line to her brain, the minute Lexi touched his number, a text message beeped in. Her stupid heart raced, and she rubbed at her chest to ease the unsteadiness she suddenly felt.
~I hate that I find him interesting.~
Lexi tapped the screen to read. To say she was shocked would be an understatement.
She read his disgusting message six times before finally dropping the phone onto her bed. The tears burning her eyes didnât feel like those caused by self-pity, or depression, or self-loathing. No, they felt like tears of rage.
For the first time in her life, Lexi felt her alter ego shift into control. It was as if every cell in her body supported this transition.
~Who the fuck does he think he is?~
~He called me names again. I guess everything tonight really was fake?~
Lexi stared at the phone, unsure of what to do but sure that her thoughts would never be quiet again. There was a war raging in her head, and she could not just wave a white flag and end it.
~I thought he wouldâve learned his lesson and treated me differently from now on. Especially since we would be seeing each other on Sunday mornings. But no, he had to ruin it. Had to return to his douchebag self in less than a goddamn hour.~
Lexi lost track of how long she sat in the same spot, staring at her phone. The voices on her television were completely drowned out by the rants raging in her head.
Lexi was usually levelheaded, but when she blinked and looked down at her fingers, they trembled. She wasnât cold. Wasnât scared. This shake came from angerâan anger unlike any sheâd ever felt in her life.
~This fucker brings out the worst in me.~
To make matters even worse, he sent another text.
Before touching her phone, Lexi thought, ~What is it this time? Perhaps you thought of new words to ridicule and humiliate me?~
She had to squint to read because her head was suddenly drumming hard.
Daniel
IÂ hope youâre not offended. You said some harsh things too. I just wanted to thank you for coming. Disregard the rest of it.
Words Lexi had never said in her life escaped her lips. âNo, you can disregard the fucking cactus up your ass, you prick!â
Her fingers moved of their own volition, channeling her alter ego.
Lexi
On a date. Canât talk. No need to thank me. It was a fundraiser for charity. Just think of our date as me doing my part.
Send.
After sending the text, Lexi cursed again. âGo fuck yourself, Daniel. You think the world revolves around you, but it doesnât! Egotistical jackass fucker!â
Her heart drummed loudly, and she couldnât stop herself from screaming. Though she had no intention of crying, tears fell anyway.
~I hate myself for acting this way.~
~I hate him for pushing me too far.~
~I hate him for making me feel sorry for him earlier.~
~And I hate the fact that I have to lie to win an argument.~
~But I regretâ¦nothing.~
As Lexi allowed resolve to wash over her, Daniel called. She cut it so abruptly that she burst out laughing. Picturing the look on his face now was beyond satisfying.
Her subconscious still clearly had a bone to pick, though, because she heard herself say, âYes, I hung up on you. Deal with it, you dick.â
Lexi laughed out loud again. She blamed this sudden change in her mood on a sugar rush; surely, she must have eaten too much cake and ice cream.
Nevertheless, the pride that traveled through her body carried something with it: confidence. And she liked it.
Smiling, Lexi walked back to the kitchen to wash her plate and utensils. Afterward, the apartment was quiet, save for the sound of her feet shuffling back to her cozy little room.
Feeling happier than she expected to be, Lexi crawled under the sheets and settled in. It had been about thirty minutes since she sent her reply, and she wanted to check if he had read it.
Daniel had responded with a photo and two words.
Daniel
 Good night
Curious, Lexi tapped on the photo and waited a few seconds for it to download. When it did, she saw his hand gripping the back of a womanâs hair. Her forehead and eyes were covered by an emoji, but her lips were widely wrapped around his cock.
Lexi erased the image immediately, but it was too late. She had already seen it.
The thickness of his member shocked her more than the wench sucking it did. The veins pulsing along the shaft, the veins pulsing on his hands as he gripped her hair, showed he wasnât being gentle either.
Lexi waited to feel angry, but she wasnât disgusted by the photo at all. She was ~envious~ of the woman who he had allowed to do something so personal to him.
And he had snapped a photo just to show her. Just as a jab about how she wouldnât be one of them.
~I donât want to be one of them,~ Lexi reminded herself. ~I want to beâ¦different.~
Leaning against her headboard, she pulled her legs up to her chest and hugged them. The silence in her head now was annoying. At least some argument or monologue would help her figure out what card to play next.
~He must be enjoying my silence. Thinking Iâm sitting in bed, crying my eyes out, and feeling sorry for myself. Why else would he send me that picture?~
~Heâs playing games with me. Heâs the one in control of this game, and Iâm just struggling along, trying to figure out the rules so I can make a move.~
Lexi wrote several messages and erased them. Nothing she came up with could beat the hand he had just played.
All she knew was that she had to get him back. She had to win this tonight, or sheâd never sleep again. Would never be able to face him or feel confident walking out the front door into the world of jackasses just like him.
Without thinking much further, Lexi pulled up Pornhub on her phone and searched through the images of amateur porn stars. She looked for one of a girl with auburn hair, pale skin, and small tits.
After seven minutes, she found her.
The woman was lying on her side in bed with the covers pulled back. A manâs arm was wrapped around her waist as he pounded into her from behind.
The image did nothing for Lexi, but the womanâs body could pass for her own. Also, the manâs arm and body looked bigger than Danielâs: more veins, more muscles. ~Good.~
Lexi examined the photo for another minute and realized from the angle that it was the woman who took it. It also helped that she blocked their faces out. ~Perfect.~
She downloaded the picture and sent it to Daniel.
Lexi
Sweet dreams.
Lexi then turned her phone completely off and settled in to sleep.