Chapter 16

Avery Jase’s mom is gorgeous. She’s got long dark hair, neatly secured at the nape of her neck, and wide honey-colored eyes with the same thick, dark eyelashes as Jase. Her eyes are weary though, and are currently sizing me up. I wonder what Jase has told her about me. Does she think we’re dating?

When we reach the porch, she pulls Jase into a hug, and I wait nervously beside them.

“Avery?” she asks, releasing him.

I nod once. Her smile is wide and welcoming, and I see that I have nothing to worry about. “Hi, Mrs.

Owens.”

“Call me Cathy.” She pulls me in for a hug too, and I hear her tell Jase over my shoulder “She’s gorgeous, Jase.”

He chuckles. “Trust me, Mom, I’m all too aware.”

I stand there stunned, trying to pretend they’re not talking about me like I’m not here, trying to pretend that Jase thinking I’m gorgeous doesn’t turn my insides to mush. We enter the house and the inside is even more immaculate than the outside. A large marble floored foyer with a round table holding a giant vase of fragrant peonies greets us. Wow. A staircase winds off one side of the foyer, and the other opens to a spacious living room with the highest ceiling I’ve ever seen.

Jase gives me a tour of the large, opulent first floor with Cathy trailing behind us, asking us each occasional questions about school. She leaves us after that, saying dinner will be at five, excusing herself to the sunroom where she perches in a lounge chair with a romance novel.

Jase leads me upstairs to his bedroom. The carpeting is so soft and plush beneath my feet as I trail after him down the long hallway. Their house really is beautiful.

His bedroom appears unchanged from high school – the walls are adorned with posters of supermodels and pro athletes, and a shelving unit holds various trophies and medals. When I get closer, I see they’re for swimming and tennis. Interesting. I didn’t take him for much of an athlete, though his lean physique begs to differ.

He crosses the room and tosses our bags onto a dark mahogany sleigh bed that sits under the window.

He doesn’t expect me to sleep in here, does he? Surely his mom wouldn’t be okay with that. Surely I wouldn’t be okay with that.

“Jase?” I question, watching him walk toward me.

“I like having you in my space.”

Uncertain of how to answer, I remain still and silent as he approaches. His hand cups my jaw, his thumb skittering back and forth against my skin. My eyes flick to his mouth, lingering on his lips, that I know from experience are incredibly soft and full. His mouth curves up a fraction and I know I’ve been caught. His thumb continues its gentle caress on my cheek and his eyes are bright with desire.

“You know this isn’t going to work. Should we just get it out of the way?” he asks finally.

“Get what out of the way?”

“Sex.”

“Excuse me?”

“You’ve got to feel this raw sexual energy radiating between us.”

I scoff. “I most certainly do not.” Lie. My damn panties are probably wet. Bastard.

He laughs, a deep throaty chuckle that lights up my nerve endings and makes my skin tingle. “Despite your tendency to lie through your teeth about being attracted to me, you’re still outrageously delicious.”

“Delicious?”

“Outrageously so.”

“So now I’m outrageously delicious? Isn’t that a cereal tagline?”

“No. That’s magically delicious. And stop changing the subject.”

“And what subject are we on?” I ask, suddenly breathless.

“The eventual sex we’re going to have. I’m going to open you up in more ways than one, babe.”

Holy shit. My knees buckle and I reach out to grasp onto Jase’s biceps. “Jase,” I rasp. If I had any upper body strength I’d punch myself in the ovaries for the idiotic way I’m behaving. But he possesses the distinct ability to turn me into a pile of hormones, and there’s no denying that fact.

His eyes have gone dark, all the humor has disappeared from his face. “Tell me what you want.”

“I can’t. I need more time.”

His eyes dart from my mouth to my eyes. “We’ll discuss this later. I’ll show you to your room.”

I nod and follow him, being sure to keep my clutch on his arm so I don’t stagger on my uncooperative legs.

Over dinner, Jase asks his mom about her therapy appointments and medication dosage, and I’m surprised they’re talking so openly in front of me. On the car ride over, Jase explained the reason he needed to check on her – saying that she lost it several months ago and was briefly hospitalized. I’m sure there’s more to the story, but not wanting to pry, I allowed him to share only what he was comfortable with me knowing. Lord knew there were plenty of secrets I kept to myself. The fact that Jase has brought me home and introduced me to his mom, someone who’s clearly important to him, leaves me feeling rattled. He continues to surprise me with his openness – making himself vulnerable while I stay closed off.

His mom squeezes his hand from across the table, the simple touch meant to reassure. “I’m on a low dose anxiety pill, but I told you, honey, I really am doing much better. I’ve been exercising again, gardening a little too. Things are good right now.” She smiles at him, but Jase’s face remains serious, guarded, like he’s trying desperately to decipher her words.

I sit in silence while his mom heaps a scoop of mashed potatoes and a slice of meatloaf onto my plate.

It’s nice to have a home cooked meal, and the food smells delicious.

“I’m so proud of my son. I can’t believe you’re a junior in college already. Your dad and I are both proud,” Cathy says out of the blue. I think she’s just desperately trying to change the subject. I know I would be.

“Don’t, Mom.”

“I’m serious, Jase. He felt bad about how things went last time you were home.”

Jase shifts uncomfortably in his chair. “Let’s just drop it. I’m sure Avery doesn’t want to hear all the family bullshit.”

“Jase,” Cathy pleads.

I find his hand under the table and give it a squeeze. “It’s fine.”

I hate seeing Jase uncomfortable, and apparently discussing his Dad sets him off. I want to take the pressure off him, and feeling inspired by how open they’ve been, I take a deep breath and launch into the story about starting my search for my birthmom. Cathy leans forward, silently encouraging me with the soft crinkles around her eyes. The crease between Jase’s brows disappears. It’s the first time I’ve confirmed to Jase that I went ahead and completed the initial paperwork and he grins at me.

After that little sharing session, I focus on my meal, attempting a bite of the meatloaf. It’s horribly dry and I force the bite down. Across the table, Jase is doing the same, the lump of food lodged in his throat visible.

Cathy sets her fork down and frowns. “Sorry, I didn’t make any sauce or gravy, you guys. Is it too dry?”

she asks.

“No, it’s great,” I lie.

She smiles apologetically, like she knows I’m lying but isn’t going to call me on it. Jase smirks and takes a gulp of his water to get the bite down.

* * *

“Sorry about that meatloaf from hell,” Jase says, slipping into the hot tub next to me. It takes a full minute for his words to register. His chest and abs are sickening. His entire torso is sculpted muscle and I’m a horny, hormonal mess. Crap!

“Hm? Oh, it’s fine,” I manage when I realize he’s still waiting for a response.

“She’s normally a really good cook,” he says, sinking onto the bench seat beside me. He finds my hand under the warm water and gives it a squeeze. Chill bumps rise over my skin, despite the heat vapors drifting lazily around us. “You’re already pruned.” His fingers skim along mine.

“You took forever to change,” I explain.

“Yeah, sorry about that. I went to say goodnight to my mom and wanted to ask again about how she was doing.”

“Oh.” Now I feel guilty, complaining I had to wait in a wonderfully relaxing hot tub while he took care of his mom, probably tucking her in and everything like a good son. A bad boy who loves his mom? Oh Lord, I’m done for. I shift on the bench seat, suddenly finding things a bit cramped with Jase’s large form stretched out next to me. There’s nowhere to look that isn’t his tan, smooth skin, nowhere to move where I won’t accidently brush against him.

His grip on my wrist effectively stops my squirming. “Hey, Whistle. Breathe for me, okay?”

Can he see the panicked look on my face? Hear the pounding of my heartbeat?

I pull a ragged breath into my lungs as Jase slides closer and tips my chin to meet his eyes. “Tell me what’s wrong.”

“You…”

“Me?” His smile falters.

“Not you…but you in swim trunks…”

He looks down at his naked chest, his gaze wandering down to the navy blue board shorts submerged underwater. A slow smile blooms on his mouth as he realizes that his half-naked form is what’s gotten me all flustered. “Babe, you in a bathing suit is a thing of fucking wonder, trust me. But I told you, nothing’s gonna happen that you’re not ready for.”

A tiny whimper escapes the back of my throat and my eyes slide closed.

Jase is going to think I’m crazy. Hell, I am crazy. I’ve warned him away from me numerous times, and now I’m ready to beg him to get closer. Far from the pressures of school, in a place where no one knows me and a beautiful man is looking at me with desire in his eyes? There’s no way I’ll be able to resist. And the thing is, I don’t want to. I just want to let go.

His expression is tense, his jaw working as he reads the emotions in my features. “Whistle…” His hold on my jaw remains, his thumb lightly stroking my cheek. “Stay still. Let me kiss you.” He moves closer, not waiting for my answer. It must be obvious on my face. His breath mingles with my own as he closes the distance between us. “Just once,” he whispers.

When my hands move from my lap, I’m not sure. But they tangle themselves in the hair at the back of his neck, and I use the leverage to pull Jase closer. His mouth presses against mine, warm and solid and grounding me in this moment. His lips begin to move, slowly devouring, slowly unraveling what I’ve worked hard to bury. His tongue glides along mine and a wave of heat tingles on my skin, pooling between my legs. One more soft caress of his tongue swiping against mine, and Jase pulls back to gauge my reaction.

My entire body is humming with pleasure, and I’m ready for more. “Still with me?” he asks.

I nod, obediently.

His jaw relaxes, and he slouches down into the bench seat, visibly relieved at my reassurance. With one hand still holding mine, he pulls me over to him, nestling me in against his body. Which is good, because without something solid to grasp onto, it’s possible I could drown in the three feet of water.

His fingers lace with mine and he releases a heavy sigh. “Okay…so you liked the kiss.”

I nod.

“And your body was practically begging me to continue…” His fingertips lightly graze my bare thigh.

“Which means I’m completely confused.”

I swallow a wave of nerves, biting my lip but make no move to explain.

“Say it, Avery. Tell me this is okay. You’re not like other girls I’ve been with, and I fucking love that, but I’m totally unsure what to do here.”

I know I’ve told him I’m not ready, that I don’t want this. But what scares me more than anything is that I actually do want this…want him…so bad I can feel it in my core. “I’m not good at all this. I had my trust broken big time. And I just…”

His hand squeezes mine. “Hey. It’s okay. I don’t want to push you. You just…you know how I feel about you, right? You’re perfect, Avery.”

Ha! I am so far from perfect, but rather than tear myself down again, I focus on his words, the honest need in his eyes. He doesn’t mention the R-word, so I’m not sure if we are talking about a relationship or just the physical aspects. And I still hate his relationship with Stacia more than is even remotely normal. But half-naked Jase is clouding my judgment and I crawl over into his lap, placing my palms on each of his cheeks. “Kiss me again.”

Several minutes later, I’m moving against his lap and we’re still kissing eagerly when Jase pulls back.

“Avery…wait. My mom’s bedroom is right up there.” He points to the second floor window looking down on us. “I think she’s sleeping, but just in case…we should go inside.”

I nod, and disentangle myself from his lap. Sheesh. The last thing she needs to see is me wildly riding her son in their hot tub.

Watching Jase get out of the hot tub is a test of my physical restraint. His erection strains against his swim trunks and he tucks a towel around his waist, grimacing as though it’s painful. He grips my hand firmly and tows me inside as I let out a giggle.