Chapter 160
âCould it be me instead?â I stood my ground, locking eyes with him, my words deliberate and straightforward.
To say I had no hopes would be a lie. I could deceive anyone but not my own heart. I hadnât moved on. Despite knowing there was no way forward for us, I still harbored a sliver of hope that, at some point over the years, he had felt something for me, even if it was just for a fleeting moment. It had been eight years. How many eight years did one have in a lifetime?
His eyes drew me in like whirlpools and his voice had this tempting pull when he spoke, âIf I said it was you, would that stop us from getting a divorce? Can we not end it?â
I was stunned, struggling to maintain clarity as I looked at him and shook my head. âBryant, if you had feelings for me, it would only mean my years of unrequited love werenât in vain. That might give me a bit of solace. But that is not a reason for us to keep going.â
Bryant asked, âAll these years?â
âYes, all these years.â Suddenly, I felt ready to lay bare my feelings, no longer hiding them. I laughed and said, âEight years, Bryant. Iâve been into you since college, for eight years.â
After saying it all out loud, maybe I could finally let go of regrets. Telling Bryant openly that I had feelings for him was not shameful. âHow could Iâ¦â Bryantâs eyes widened in surprise, a mix of joy and skepticism. âDidnât you have a thing for Mark back in college?â
I took a deep breath to quell the bitterness in my heart. âWho told you that? Or did you think there must be a romance between them if guy and a girl get along well?â
Bryant hesitated, âThenâ¦â
âForgot? Didnât you wish me a happy eighth anniversary recently? I forced a smile, though not graceful, and continued, âThe day I woke up in the hospital and sow you, I started to fall for you. Thanks for getting me to the hospital in time and for all the meals you went out of your way to treat me to.â
âYouâ¦â Bryant looked away, his posture wavering, his voice tight. âYou fell for me because of that?â
For some reason, I sensed panic in him. I tried to sound casual. âMaybe, to you, it was just a small favor, long forgotten, but to me back then, it was a beacon of light. Bryant, regardless, I was grateful to youâ
Having said it all, I was ready to start anew, leaving the past behind. I wouldnât owe Bryant anything anymore!
He suddenly pulled out a pack of cigarettes, lighting one with a grace that made it more distinguished. After a few puffs, his expression turned even murkier.
The smoke seemed to choke him, a rare moment of disarray as he looked at me, âIf if I hadnât been the one to take you to the hospital that dayâ¦â He coughed, his eyes reddening, his voice rough, âWould you still have fallen for me?â