Chapter 323: 323 Too Much Fun!

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“Thursday! Oh BOY! Oh BOY! Hey, I’m Penny!” The TV screen was playing the EP01 trailer for ‘The Big Bang Theory’, with Sheldon and Leonard riding the bus, sweet smiles from the new neighbor Penny, and a glimpse of guest star Zack Galifianakis as the bus driver, his bearded face brimming with joy. It also showed Howard, Raj, and others, with Wang Yang’s words, character voices, audience laughter, and a narrator mixing it all together as they said, “The-Big-Bang-Theory, Thursdays, must-watch on NBC! Take a pleasurable bath!”

Watch Prison Break on NBC on Mondays, FOX’s new show House M.D. on Tuesdays, ABC’s new show Lost on Wednesdays, and on Thursdays watch…

Time had now arrived at September 30th, Thursday, the day of the week with the highest viewership peak, whether it was the previous season or the current one, ABC, FOX, UPN, WB had neither the power nor the intention to compete, and the programs scheduled for the prime time evening slots seemed to be somewhat of a filler, satisfied with receiving 6 to 7 million viewers; the main contenders were still CBS and NBC, battling fiercely for the 03-04 season.

From 8:00 PM to 9:00 PM, CBS had the hour-long ‘Survivor’ series; in ’03 Survivor: Pearl Islands averaged 20.72 million, and in ’04 Survivor: All-Stars was at 21.49 million, while NBC had 20.84 million watching Friends. In ’03, from 8:30 PM to 9:00 PM, there were 10.25 million watching ‘Scrubs’, and in ’04, 15.20 million watched ‘Will & Grace’. Overall, CBS was winning; from 9:00 PM to 10:00 PM, the hottest series ‘CSI: Crime Scene Investigation’ attracted an average of 25.27 million viewers to CBS, while NBC in ’03 began with ‘Will & Grace’ and the 12.25 million viewer ‘Scrubs’. Later, after the winter hiatus in ’04, they rolled out the successful reality show ‘The Apprentice’, the first season of which had 20.70 million viewers. All in all, CBS was still winning; from 10:00 PM to 11:00 PM, NBC with 19.04 million viewers for ‘Emergency Room’, beat CBS’s 16.74 million for ‘Without a Trace’.n/o/vel/b//in dot c//om

This year CBS’s Thursday line-up hasn’t changed, still featuring ‘Survivor’, ‘CSI’, and ‘Without a Trace’; NBC’s line-up is also the same with sitcoms, ‘The Apprentice’ and ‘ER’, only now the sight of ‘Friends’, which had been there for ten years at Thursday-8:00 PM to 8:30 PM, has disappeared. Its spot was taken by the new show ‘The Big Bang Theory’, followed by the spin-off ‘Joey’ from ‘Friends’ but tonight ‘The Big Bang Theory’ is airing two episodes back to back.

“Ten years!”

Ten years, only to marvel at how time flies. Wang Yang remembered when he was 14 years old in 1994, already using a Super8 to film things, loving riding around with a camera capturing every detail of the world, enjoying movies and writing reviews. It was the time of his “infatuation” with poetry and Natalie Portman. Now, he was married to Jessica; if not for her illness, they would probably be calculating the due date now.

Natalie recalled that ten years ago, when she was 13, after being talent-spotted on the streets once again, she was lucky enough to successfully audition. Her debut ‘Léon: The Professional’ hit the screens in France in September and premiered in America in November, seemed to have earned nearly 20 million in North American box office. Then came a whole lot of fame and growing pains, and now she was attending Harvard, having received an Oscar nomination for Best Actress, became known as a prodigy, freely carrying ‘V for Vendetta’. Her favorite man got married to someone else, and they were good friends, well, what can you say? It’s the story of a lucky girl.

Jessica remembered ten years ago, when she was 13, after a good few years of both soft and hard strategies, getting her way at 12 years old, her father finally allowed her to go to acting school. She quickly signed with an agent and was lucky enough to audition successfully when a lead actress abruptly quit due to a similar hair color. Her debut ‘Camp Nowhere’ premiered across America in August, seeming to have brought in ten million at the North American box office. Then came a slow series of film contracts, and now she was happily married to the man she loved, happily making movies together, if it wasn’t for the damned illness, by now they’d be starting to stock up on baby clothes!

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Rachel remembered how, ten years ago, she wanted to skip school every day just to embrace the TV and binge-watch shows… With only a few minutes left until 8:00 PM, perhaps everyone who once followed “Friends” might feel a little sentimental. There would be no familiar theme song anymore, no more Central Perk cafe, children turned into young people, young people into middle-aged, and a decade later came a new series. If it was interesting enough, they all would be quite willing to continue their Thursday 8 PM habit of tuning into NBC.

The final episode of the tenth season of “Friends” attracted a massive audience of 51.1 million viewers, ranking fourth in television history for finale viewership, with an average of 20.84 million viewers—a tremendously valuable asset. It provided “The Big Bang Theory” with an enviable audience base, coupled with NBC’s heavy-duty promotional campaign, and the pilot even directed by Wang Yang. “The Big Bang Theory” had no excuse to fail; if it did, it would mean the show itself was garbage.

“I just want 18 million viewers and a 9-point rating in the 18-49 demographic, that’s all! I’m not greedy…” Kevin Reilly of NBC’s entertainment division was very tense a few days ago, although he had been quite content. Staring at the television screens of different channels in front of him, he prayed silently and became more and more nervous as the broadcast time approached. The previous “Freaks and Geeks” was too frightening. If he messed up this NBC prime time, the consequences would be dire! “TBBT” had a great test showing at the San Diego Comic-Con, but whether that would translate to household screens…

“It’s just another ‘Freaks and Geeks’, it’s bound to be.” CEO Nancy Tellem of CBS’s entertainment division, programming manager Caleb Dier, and others were exerting their jinxing powers; Anne Sweeney and others from ABC were also watching the screen intently, hoping the miraculous aura of “TBBT” wouldn’t face a Waterloo!

“Oh my—!” Kaley Cuoco let out a high-pitched shout in the living room, releasing the tension. Going from “8 Simple Rules for Dating My Daughter” to Wang Yang’s miraculous “The Big Bang Theory” was something many dreamed of, but thinking about how Megan Fox starred in “Firefly” made her a bit gloomy, as she was now relying on “The Big Bang Theory” for her acting career! And for newcomers like Jim Parsons, the once-lost Johnny Galecki, as well as creators like Graham Linehan, Bill Prady, and scientist David Saltzberg, the harvest time was imminent.

As Eastern Time hit 7:59 PM, millions of viewers seated on their living room sofas picked up their remote controls and pressed the buttons, switching over to NBC.

“It’s starting, it’s starting!” Among these viewers were all ages, ethnicities, and professions—elementary, middle, high school, and college students, including Evelyn from the University of San Francisco, as well as science and engineering students from CIT, MIT, UCLA, Harvard, and more. Ever since Wang Yang announced the title “The Big Bang Theory,” promising to include theoretical physics, applied physics, astronomy, mathematics, geek culture, and online gaming, they had been extraordinarily eager for this fantastical sitcom. And the founder was Wang Yang himself!

After sending a text message, “Don’t worry, buddy, if the ratings suck, I’ll come and make a guest appearance to save you,” Natalie Portman looked at the TV screen with great interest. She had already informed many of her classmates about the show, hoping to boost viewership.

In Boston, a white male student from MIT’s physics department hurried back to his dorm while talking on the phone, “I can’t miss it. I have a friend who went to San Diego Comic-Con, and he said you’d regret not watching it! Can’t talk now, I’m in a rush…” In Los Angeles, many students from UCLA’s College of Letters and Science knew that their professor David Saltzberg was involved in the writing of “The Big Bang Theory.” Meanwhile, Chinese American students who had met Wang Yang a year ago were each watching their TVs, looking forward to almost a year, and it had finally come!

“Have you really never been to the cinema to see ‘Camp Nowhere’? Try to remember hard! Maybe you forgot something?” In the spacious and elegant living room, Jessica enthusiastically clapped her hands as if at a boxing match. Wang Yang frowned and thought hard for a while, recollecting the summer when he was 14, in August, which should have been the time for “Forrest Gump,” “True Lies,” and “The Mask.” He shook his head regretfully, “No, I missed it.” Having asked several times from the age of 16 to 23, Jessica wasn’t too disappointed, but suddenly her eyes lit up, “It’s starting!”

“This is the worst day of my life,” Sheldon complained as he and Leonard walked toward the bus stop on the side of the road, with countless eyes watching on NBC. Leonard glanced at him, “As always.” A light audience laughter followed. Sheldon ignored him and continued in his unique rhythmic manner, “The car broke down, lost my wallet, and it even had a picture of Luke Skywalker in it.” Leonard reminded him, “My car, my wallet.” Sheldon went on, “No one’s willing to lend us money, no one wants to come help us… Oh boy, Leonard, look at the kind of friends you have!” Leonard glanced at him, “I really don’t know.”

Less than half a minute had passed and the audience’s laughter had already filled the TV several times, bringing smiles or even laughter to households everywhere. Clearly, the tall, arrogant man was a complete oddball, and the dispirited shorter one was the more normal nerd, but weren’t they CIT physics professors, geniuses with high IQs? “This is funny, this is funny!” Many who laughed loudly had already decided that “TBBT” was a great show, and truly, the Best Director, known for the most humorous and funny content, did not disappoint!

In just a short speech, there were three laugh points. Even without any scientific theories or high IQ being shown yet, “Star Wars” fans were already delighted. “Haha!” Natalie laughed, a thought flashing through her mind, “Why not a picture of Queen Padmé Amidala?” And then, the TV elicited another burst of laughter.

“Wait a minute! Getting on there is no different from committing suicide.” The bus arrived and just as Leonard was about to board, Sheldon suddenly cried out to stop him. With resignation, Leonard asked, “What now?” The camera showed the bus driver, played by guest star Zach Galifianakis, dressed in his “The Hangover” attire—a grey T-shirt and an Indiana Jones satchel—with a fierce look on his face, which only added an absurd sense of humor.

While scanning the bus interior with disdain, Sheldon said quickly, “Look at those fabric seats, research shows that on average there are 80 colonies of bacteria per seat, dirtier than the floor; and the door handles could have tens of millions of E. coli…” Amongst the chuckles from the audience, Leonard, clearly annoyed, tried to board the bus, but Sheldon, in panic, grabbed him, “Do you know what this means? There’s fecal contamination in the bus, it’s likely to cause dysentery, hepatitis…”

“Looks like you two can only take an Apollo spacecraft home,” the chubby driver mocked, and with his signature goofy laugh, he moved to close the bus doors. The laughter of the live audience in the studio burst out once more, as did the laughter from those watching at home. With so many modes of transport, only those donning a spacesuit would be free of bacteria, right? But the Apollo moon landings had ceased decades ago; the implication being that these two nerdy men could never return home—they don’t belong to the Earth, but to the Moon instead.

“Wait!” Leonard called to the driver again, trying to board the bus, but Sheldon pulled him back once more, saying urgently, “And there are no seat belts on the bus, they won’t even let me use rubber bands to tie myself to the seat!” The chubby driver chimed in, “Then stand.” The audience erupted into laughter once again, Sheldon glared at the driver and loudly persuaded Leonard, “You don’t even know if the driver is drunk.” The audience’s laughter surged again!

“Hahaha!” Laughter erupted in countless homes and apartments across America. Who hasn’t seen “The Hangover”? “The Hangover 2” had just ended its successful run, and this chubby guy was a weirdo genius in the movies. Even those who didn’t recognize Zach Galifianakis still enjoyed the moment to the fullest.

For the last time, Sheldon stopped Leonard from boarding, with a serious look on his face, “Leonard, if I step on this bus, you might lose a friend who could be a future Nobel Prize winner in Physics, and then you won’t be able to appear in ‘The Autobiography of Dr. Sheldon Cooper’!” Leonard looked up with his mouth open in thought, then, after a couple of seconds, waved his hand dismissively and got on the bus, “It doesn’t matter, you won’t win the Nobel Prize.”

“I’m dying of laughter, oh my God, I can’t handle it…” At the University of San Francisco, the female dormitory where Evelyn lived, all three roommates hadn’t gone out on dates that day but instead gathered to watch the premiere of Mike’s new show. In the first two minutes, although Lillian and Sophia were also laughing non-stop, they occasionally looked at Evelyn oddly. Sure enough! They had realized a year ago that they had never seen anyone laugh at a TV show like that! And it was during ‘8 Simple Rules for Dating My Daughter,’ of all shows!

By now, they all knew that Evelyn was the little girl nearly scared to death by “Paranormal Activity” years ago, and that she had no way of resisting the charm of the amazing Wang Yang. Today, they finally saw what her laughter looked like—she was completely losing her composure!

So what if the amazing Wang Yang wasn’t modest? He wasn’t bragging, and it was truly something that could make a person die laughing! Evelyn wiped the drool from her mouth and continued to giggle behind her hand, much funnier than “The Eight Simple Rules”! Kaley Cuoco must have been cracking up too! Whether it was better than “Friends” remained to be seen, but just thinking about the trailer where Sheldon and another character were standing in their underwear taking the bus, she lost all control and burst into laughter, “Hahaha!”

“Funny, funny, hehe!” However, not many people knew that the cool-as-ice Natalie also couldn’t stop laughing, slapping the couch. This Sheldon had such a punchable vibe, yet he was also very amusing and adorable, kind of like Juno.

Indeed this was a tactic to keep the audience from tuning out midway through the first episode. Fans could guess that the bus scene would reappear towards the end, but what exactly was going on there, why, and what would the chubby bus driver say? Even though they knew it was a writer’s craft, their interest had still been piqued.

“Do you want to hear something interesting about stairs?” Sheldon still boldly took the bus, returned to the apartment with Leonard, and then the viewers saw the first “science content” emerge. Two well-developed geeks talked while climbing the stairs: “NO.” “If there’s even a two-millimeter difference in the height of a step, most people would trip.” “I don’t care.” …

“Two millimeters…that’s not very likely, is it?” Previously, due to Wang Yang’s on-set antics and energizing the audience, the laughter had been exceptionally loud, far exceeding the comedic effect, and it now elicited laughter from countless viewers. Seeing the listless Leonard suddenly puzzled, Sheldon became even more eager to educate: “No, it’s true. I conducted a series of experiments when I was 12. My dad even broke his collarbone because of it.”

Seeing this segment, Jessica, who had been laughing merrily all the way, was suddenly jolted as if electrocuted and exclaimed in surprise, turning to Wang Yang, “Honey! Our staircase has height differences too!” Wang Yang shrugged in disappointment: “No, I measured them.” Jessica frowned in confusion: “It doesn’t? Then why do I keep tripping?” Wang Yang explained, “I asked Professor Saltzberg; he said you’re one of the very few people with a natural klutz gene. No matter the situation, you’re prone to tripping.” Jessica had an epiphany: “Is that so?” …

As the two chatted, the show continued. Leonard asked, “Is that why they sent you to boarding school?” Sheldon answered, “No, it was because of my experiments with lasers.” Just as he was about to open the door, Leonard suddenly sees something and glances across to the opposite apartment’s open door, where a blonde bombshell in sexy denim shorts and a blue t-shirt is bending over to pack her luggage, projecting a youthful and sexy vibe.

“This is a bit of a problem…” Nancy Tellem, the president of CBS Entertainment, reflected with a sigh. How did they ever let the amazing Wang Yang slip away! (