Chapter 378

trauma.

Wound marks that are not easily visible on the outside.

It may seem like a very grandiose thing, but in fact, anyone can suffer from it.

Of course, just because anyone can have one does not mean that it is okay to look at each one lightly. To Jan, the sound of cicadas, to Demirea, a flower on her head, to Alan, sweet food, to Needlen, a dark alley, to Chase, the spire of the royal palace, to Bern, the deep sea. Like the emotions they remind us of, it may feel like nothing special to some people, but for the person involved, isn’t it a wound that can’t be easily healed?

It was the same with Arsene. For Arsene, meeting someone for the first time was like that. Ever since he was harshly scolded by his teacher for not greeting him properly when he met him for the first time, his shoulders have been sore whenever he meets someone for the first time. The sadness of that day came to mind.

“…… this.”

Arsene looked down at his feet with a slightly disappointed look on his face. Since he had used an invisibility spell, he could not be seen by others, but since this was not the case for Arsene, he could clearly see the tips of his feet, which were not willing to take a single step forward.

– Thick!

He feels pain shooting out of his left shoulder.

It wasn’t a phantom pain from the day I got scolded by my teacher. Of course, it was true that it was phantom pain, but the problem was not caused by that incident but by an incident on a different day.

A voice with a murderous gaze.

And a red aura.

‘If you follow me, I will kill you.’

Rashid Briesen. I ran into that guy, why?

Why did he think of the Zeon warrior who had pushed him to the brink of death in the forest he visited with Euria? After that, I encountered many Zeon warriors, but they were fine. Why now?

Maybe it’s because of the darkness similar to that day.

Perhaps it was because he knew that Rashid Briesen was skilled enough to be invisible and detect him while he was hiding.

It was unknown, but one thing was clear. The fact is that the son Gray has not yet presented to the world is quite a strong man. It may not be possible to determine the exact level, but at least it is enough to make Arsene recall the events of that day and cause phantom pain in his injured shoulder.

“……There’s more reason to quickly increase the number of circles.”

Since everyone has their own trauma, wouldn’t everyone’s attitude towards it be different? Therefore, instead of feeling fearful of Rashid, who disappeared after sending a deadly force toward his hiding place, Arsene further developed his dream of pursuing magic.

He opened his eyes black and did not feel sorry for missing the target. Not only was it not something Kalyan had ordered to do in the first place, but if you forcefully chase after the guy and get hurt again, you will be forever in the hands of Kalyan, who says, ‘Rather than worry that my follower won’t listen to me again and goes out and gets hurt again, I’ll just eliminate the cause.’ You will regret having a body that will never get hurt.

Of course, that would be if Calian killed him with his head attached to mourn him.

“If I had known this would happen, I would have stayed with the division commander.”

Instead of lamenting, Arsene looked wistful for just a moment and raised his head to look at the rooftop. And he moved his feet toward the inside of the building. If Eila was injured, either Euria or Calian would be in charge of finding out about Rashid, so he thought all he had to do was quickly go up to the rooftop and bring the brother who caused today’s incident in front of Lemaine. however.

“…… [clean].”

There was no mess.

There was blood all over the floor, and the smell of blood mixed with the scent of lilies created a numbing smell. Kalian, who I thought would be with me, is now standing alone and nowhere, and I still can’t figure out where his humanity ends…

“What happened?”

ah.

Don’t come.

I should just stay with Needlen. Or maybe I should just force myself to follow Rashid and give up, or I should just give it a go and submit a reflection report to the prince.

Oh, of course, this is only if you still have the fingers to write the reflection or the brain to think about the contents of the reflection.

anyway. Don’t come.

“Where is the prince?”

asked. There is no answer.

ah. Of course, there were many such cases. be used to. however.

“Why do you look like that?”

As we happened to be sharing the same office, Arsene seemed to have seen him the most frequently during his life, next to his master, so he didn’t want to say anything, but when he realized that his expression was truly awe-inspiring, Arsene asked with a face that he really didn’t want to ask.

“no.”

“It’s not true. There was a lot of blood on your shirt.”

“No.”

“What is it?”

“Wizard.”

“…… yes.”

I’m the vice commander.

I also have a name.

If I said that, I had a feeling that I would have to go outside the palace with royal authority, and I was also confident that if I did that, I would end up crossing the Seneu River, so I answered calmly. Because Arsene is a real adult.

“I have something to ask you.”

The Crown Prince, who does not particularly show pride in the face of things he does not understand or does not know, began asking questions with a look on his face.

In fact, rather than calling it a question, it should be more of an explanation as to why his face looks bad now, whose blood was on Arsene’s shirt before he used the clean, and why he had a slight problem with his right arm.

“Is that the question?”

“It’s a question.”

It may seem surprising that Arsene would blame him for having just been grabbed by the collar by Calian and punching someone in the face for the first time in his life, but Arsene was not that surprised. He realized that he had spoken these words with the same feelings as grabbing a passing dog and confiding in him because of his complicated feelings. Because Plantz doesn’t usually see Arsene as a complete human being with reason. Of course, that wasn’t something to be offended by.

Because it’s two-way.

“Isn’t that usually called counseling?”

“It’s a question.”

“I’m not curious about the right answer or how to do it. If you want to hear my opinion, I’ll tell you. If you want to know the answer, you can find it yourself. It’s not my place to get involved and give you the answer.”

“… I will correct it through consultation.”

Anyway, Arsene, who was looking back on Plantz’s request for consultation with the objective perspective of the fourth spotted dog among the neighborhood dogs who passed by and happened to see the fight, opened his mouth seriously.

“But are you really saying that you blocked Rashid’s sword?”

Humans are selfish animals.

Whether or not the person in front of me had a fight with our prince and requested consultation, I am an animal that can start with an attempt to deny the fact that he blocked the sword of the guy who backed away in fear. Now, Arsene is not just Arsene, he is also serving as the fourth neighborhood dog, but he is also a human.

As expected, Plantz, who heard Arsene’s words like a barking dog, did not respond. So, Arsene decided to understand that Rashid may have swung his sword at the crown prince, but he didn’t actually have the intention to kill him, or maybe he wanted to see Calian’s reaction, or maybe Rashid looked after Plantz a lot for some reason.

“Neither of you have done anything right. The prince must have felt more wrong about what you did, so let me put it another way, you also made as many mistakes as the prince.”

“know.”

“Rashid Briesen took care of you. Otherwise, you might have crossed the Seneu River before Prince Calian did.”

Plantz looked at Arsene blankly.

Arsene briefly pointed to the floor and then added his explanation.

“I just met Rashid Briesen down there, but I didn’t dare attack him for fear of getting killed.”

Either die by Rashid or die by Kalyan.

I couldn’t fight because I was afraid I would die. I feel like I’ll lose even if I just look at cancer.

“Situations that deviate from your judgment always happen. Isn’t it wrong for anyone to risk your life so carelessly without thinking about it? If you put your foot down in front of a passing ant, the ant will avoid it. Because it doesn’t want to die.”

“I know. That’s not it.”

“Yes. Don’t you mean that you did it because you thought that if you kept putting your neck on the line, Prince Calian would live more stubbornly without thinking about anything else to save you? Even if it was because you really had no regrets about living, it’s heartbreaking. It’s not because of you, it’s because of the prince. “They think that if you don’t have something to protect, you can’t live.”

“…… okay.”

“But if Rashid had used the exact same hand he showed me, a situation would have arisen where he would have lost his life trying to save a poor person when he had nothing to protect. Besides, isn’t this the first time you risked your life like that?”

“no.”

Arsene shook his head and looked at Planz’s shoulder. I was thinking about giving it an abtondant, but I decided not to because I wasn’t used to it and I didn’t think Planz would want it. And he opened his mouth again.

“Sir. The fact that the prince accepted the fact that we are different from the people of that time means that the current King Secretia also had to admit that he is not the same person he was back then. No matter how much that person is alive and well now, that person is still alive and well. “Even if you call him brother, to be honest, there is no way the brother you were trying to protect can come back alive. That person is already dead. Even if the prince took the path of the sword at that time, he died in vain.”

“…… know.”

Arsene’s voice cracked.n/o/vel/b//in dot c//om

“To a person who died after failing to protect one of his brothers with such a strong sword. Are you deliberately reminding me of the fear that something similar might happen again this time? Are you afraid that the same thing will happen to you? ”

His light green eyes closed quietly.

“Why didn’t you think about how cruel that would be? After all, to the prince who lost his brother because of us one day and who now considers you a brother and tries to save you. To the person who even put a single flower on my desk into a drawer. Why did you not? “This is the person who punched the prince for every word he said that reminded him of what it was like to lose something.”

“… I know. Now.”

Now I know why Calian was so angry.

“Every time you barely saved your life, every time you knew you had risked your life, the prince would have stood in front of the walls of Secretia on that day, anytime, anywhere. It was something he could not forget, so he would have kept returning to the kingship of that day. . Forcibly. My heart must have been broken at the thought that the same thing would happen again. Every time, it didn’t get any better.”

– Fortunately, the. I was worried.

He had known for a long time that Calian had come to regard Flanz as a brother, and he now knew that concern and observation would naturally follow.

It was only now that I realized that Plantz had done something to Calian, similar to someone deliberately putting the scent of Renieri in front of Plantz’s nose. I knew full well why Calian removed the scent in front of Plants.

“But it turned out that it wasn’t really because you didn’t know how to save your life, but if you were doing it on purpose to prevent your younger brother from going through the same thing again. However deep down, you were worried about your current younger brother. “Handle.”

Arsene paused and pursed his lips.

Who should you blame? That’s what I thought.

“Anyway, the way I see it, it was something you both did wrong, so you two can figure it out on your own. You can either judge it based on the number of mistakes you made or just say it was the same mistake and move on, no matter how bad you are at understanding it, you should have made them realize it by returning the same knife. “Whether you did it or resent it, do whatever you want. It’s not my responsibility to worry about it.”

Plantz nodded his head slowly.

Arsene, looking at his face, not sure if it was his injured shoulder or something else, let out a low voice.

“Can I ask you one favor?”

“…… What.”

The spotted dog let out a deep sigh.

“I hope you don’t forcibly create a place for Prince Calian to live and give it away.”

Plantz’s gaze turned to Arsene.

Arsene, who had endured the frustration that felt like he needed to drink about six glasses of beer, opened his mouth again.

“I understand that you didn’t intend to let him take your younger brother’s place, but rather looked after the current prince completely and created an empty spot for him as your younger brother. Prince Calian must have been grateful for the position and got along well. Now, When I came, I realized that it wasn’t just an empty seat, but that it was a place that you had deliberately put your neck on the line to prepare it for me.”

Arsene looked at Planz for a moment.

I wanted to give myself time to think about how I should explain it further so that Plantz would understand what I said.

– Maybe on days like this, I want to see the falling blue stars. I still miss the fishy smell of that small sea. There are times when I wonder if I am even worthy of standing here.

The night drunk Arsene met Calian.

I remember Calian’s voice, which I couldn’t even speak.

A voice full of salt came to mind. The words and the smell of salt that Calian probably thought Arsene wouldn’t remember. Arsene, who had tried to bury it again, continued quietly.

“It’s enough to hold on to someone who was wandering around unable to find his place and make an empty space for him. It’s okay to assume that he is a person who lives only because he has something to protect and risk his life to not take care of it, but even if the prince is really that kind of person, there is no reason for him to live. “Even if there is no reason, the prince is a person who finds a reason on his own. He may grumble that life is no good if he can’t find a reason to live, but that doesn’t mean he’s the type of person who will give up on everything.”

– I am. You really have to live well.

“Why do you deliberately take care of the prince as if there is no reason for it? If you don’t do that, you will disappear because it is clear that you will die, as if you decided that the prince will leave before his brother this time too. The prince is already eager to live, so why don’t you make a place for him to live? “What should I do if you put your life on the line? Why do you make the prince a person who needs someone to do so for him to live? Why do you have to go to such lengths to live in danger as if your younger brother would be by your side?”

– Even if it seems like I’m brushing it all off sometimes, I hope you can believe that I’m not giving up on everything. Is it difficult?

“I don’t know what happens to people, but they say something might happen right now, but it might not happen. So don’t do that. That would be an insult to both the prince and you.”

“…… okay.”

Planz closed his eyes again for a moment. And he opened his mouth to say thank you to his co-worker, who had made him aware of an unexpected fact, by telling him one more important thing.

“Your military power is so minimal that you don’t have to take too much care of it, the prince is already busy.”

He didn’t say anything.

* * *

The sound of heavy feet came from the hard heels of his shoes.

“Lord Soga. Are you coming now?”

As soon as he got off his horse, he entered the main building of the mansion and was greeted by the head butler and servants passing by. Dmirea asked, greeted by his nod.

“Lirie.”

“You fell asleep a little while ago.”

“Okay. Are you two in?”

“Not yet, the Duke and Duchess. They said the southern nobles’ meeting will be held until dawn today.”

“I understand.”

“If you haven’t eaten yet, would you like to get ready or rest?”

“It’s okay to eat, let’s take a shower first.”

“Yes, Lord Soga. I will prepare a bath for you.”

After saying this, Demirea caught a glimpse of the head deacon walking away and opened her mouth to Ronansite, the knight who had been accompanying her so far and standing behind her.

“Thank you for your hard work.”

“No, Little Duke.”

“Nothing else, just rest today.”

“All right.”

I had a rather tiring day to talk at length.

With a light heart he went to Astrisha and then to Naerangsha again. Not only did he confront the capital guards there, he went back to the palace and told them in detail how they had tried to ignore the royal law. Because Gray’s actions to capture Aila could not be ignored quietly.

Only after doing that was he able to return to the mansion.

– Tap, tap, tap.

Demirea slowly climbed the stairs with unwavering steps, passed by her bathroom, where the smell of good-smelling water had begun to spread, and went to her room. He planned to rest for a while until his bath was ready.

– Sweet.

Therefore, without much thought, he opened the door and entered the room.

-…… Tak.

Demirea entered the room and quietly closed the door. Unlike before he came here, his eyes had suddenly become sharper.

The smell of blood.

It may have been because of the scent from the bathroom, but it was because the smell that had not been felt spread all the way to the hallway.

-Sereung…….

There was the sound of a sword being quietly drawn from Demirea’s waist. In the dark, unlit room, her blue-gray eyes moved toward the direction of the unfamiliar smell.

“it’s me.”

A small voice came from the direction where the smell of blood was coming from. It was as if Dmirea was waiting for her to look where she was.

Thump. Dmirea returned her half-drawn sword and lit two dim lights. Dark brown furniture revealed dark outlines under the pale orange light.

A person can also be seen sitting in the middle of the sofa with his elbows on his knees and leaning his forehead on his clasped hands.

“Why haven’t you gone to the palace yet?”

“Yes. Not yet.”

It wasn’t a proper answer.

She didn’t even have a proper voice.

After taking a deep breath for a moment, Demirea unsheathed her sword and leaned it against the wall. Then she walked over and looked at Kalian for a moment, then turned again and opened the nightstand drawer.

“I didn’t see Raven in the stable.”

“If that were the case, the butler here would have told you that he came out to you. He’s outside the mansion. He told me to wait a moment. I wonder if he knows that pitch-black thing. At times like this, he goes to dark places and hides on his own.”

“Because you look like the owner.”

“Oh, I see.”

Demirea picked up a few suitable bandages from the numerous bandages in the drawer and sat down across from Calian again.

The smell of blood that filled the room just moments ago has now disappeared.

“You don’t need to use magic. The smell of blood isn’t uncomfortable.”

“I’m sorry if I leave the scent of blood in someone else’s room.”

“How could someone who knows it’s someone else’s room come in secretly like this?”

“But still, you are my fiancé.”

A small laugh came from a face hidden in the long shadow of the window. A long sigh flowed from Demirea’s mouth.

“Aila. How are you?”

“It’s okay. You’ll have to lie down for a few days, but Viscount Bern is here. You don’t have to worry.”

“…… I’m glad.”

“yes.”

“Don’t come tomorrow. Come next time, Demirea. If you’ve already told her. I wonder if she’s looking forward to it. Then I’m sorry.”

“I haven’t told Lillie yet. As soon as I made an appointment with the prince, I was out all this time. Didn’t I come in now?”

“Ah. I guess so.”

Demirea opened his pursed lips once more and stretched out his hand. Then he took Calian’s right hand, looked into it, and said,

“I’ve seen the prince almost die, but this is the first time I’ve seen him get hit.”

“Oh my. Is it still noticeable?”

“It shows a lot.”

It wasn’t about the hand held out in front of her, but about the scar on the end of her lip.

“I guess your fist is spicier than I thought. It exploded properly.”

“Yes. It hurt… But did I tell you that I got hit by my brother?”

“You didn’t do it. If not, who would it be? You couldn’t even go back to the palace, so you came here.”

“Ah. I thought you were mistaken when I told you.”

“Are you the kind of person who would be mistaken by saying this, prince?”

“is not it.”

“no.”

“That’s a good thing, too.”

Dmirea frowned as she looked at the wounds on Calian’s palms and arms, then stood up again and brought out a medicine. I knew that I wasn’t the person to go to Hina, who was exhausted from treating Aila, to ask her to fix her hand.

“Your arm is bad, but your palm is even worse. It will heal on its own, but be sure to show it to Sir Bern when you wake up.”

“Yes. I will.”

A bluish-gray foam rises from the pure white medicine sprayed on the wound. Even though it was extremely painful, Kalian did not flinch a single fingertip. Demi Lea clicked her tongue as she didn’t like the sight very much and opened her mouth.

“Are you not sick?”

“It hurts. A lot.”

“How did it come to this?”

“We hugged, fought, and confronted each other.”

“You’re not the kind of person who goes around getting beaten up. What did you do so wrong?”

“I made a mistake. I wasn’t the only one. I made a mistake. I.”

“Did you apologize?”

“I have to do it. I’m going to go and apologize. I’m going to get an apology too. That’s what I’m going to do.”

Demirea nodded her head.

After wiping away the medicine that dripped from her, Demirea placed gauze over her wound. Then he took the bandage and carefully wrapped it around his arm and hand.

“I guess I should at least bring some tea.”

“No. I’m going. Now.”

“Would you like to go once your lips are fully healed?”

“I thought they would kick you out right away. They said they would give you medicine and tea.”

“How can we kick you out when you’re acting like that? We should give you medicine and tea.”

Calian chuckled.

A small voice continued.

“No. I came here and hid, bragging to you that I was sick. On days like today, there was someone there who had nowhere to hide and the only place to complain was in front of the cat. It was obvious that he would just sit by the lakeside. I should go. ”

Dmirea nodded her head and knotted the bandage. And he said, pointing to her rolled up black shirt sleeves.

“The nobles will be really happy if you do that. I’ll give you some clothes for your brother, so just wait a moment.”

“It would be big.”

“It’s better than your father’s clothes. Or should I give you my clothes?”

“No. Turn it off, Jan.”

“yes.”

The cost of bandages would be expensive, and if you factor in the cost of clothes, you might end up working in the duke’s backyard until you die.

After a while, Dmirea, who had handed Jan’s clothes, was about to leave, but Calian, who raised her head towards Dmirea, opened his mouth.

“Thank you, Demirea. When will you repay me for giving you the medicine?”

“I guess that’s the price the prince pays for teaching your brother to play the harmonica.”

“Oh, did Jan tell you?”

“When the prince wasn’t around, he blew into my ears. Now Lirie knows how to do it too.”

A small laugh erupted.

“Do you know how to handle Riri?”

“Yes. My brother has only learned a little from the prince.”

“Good. Really.”

Demirea responded with a small smile and went out into the hallway to help Calian change his clothes. And after telling the owner that the bath was ready and that she would be back in a bit, she returned.

Meanwhile, Kalian, who had changed into the smallest shirt and jacket that Jan had, was standing in front of the long window. Knowing that he was planning to go there, Demirea went to the window to see him off.

“Thank you, Demirea.”

“You already said hello.”

“Still. I always get things from my fiancé.”

“It’s better because you always knew. She hurt her hand again, so the sparring has to be postponed again.”

“That’s right. I can’t keep that every time.”

Calian’s eyes took in Demirea’s dark gray shirt and black jacket with carefully wrapped bandages over her hands.

“That’s so strange.”

“What do you mean?”

Yan’s jacket is wider than Kalyan’s.

Maybe if the sleeves were a little longer.

“Actually, I was a person who was very good at keeping promises.”

A black jacket that would have fit Bern perfectly.

– It is not difficult to protect whether a thousand or ten thousand people come. You know it too, brother. How strong is your brother and sister? Because I’m not going to die, I’m going to protect. So don’t worry… take Arianne with her mother for a moment. It won’t take long. Please wait a moment.

“Once I break it, it seems like there are more and more things I can’t keep. It’s difficult to keep it.”

– …… I’ll be back. I’ll be back.

A cold wind was blowing past her, and Demi Leah, who could not see her face smiling sadly, was about to tell her that it would not be possible so she should go and have some tea, but Kalian opened the window. The hot wind of the night suddenly blew in.

“I’m going. My fiancé.”

“…… yes.”

“I’ll contact you when I’m better.”

“All right.”

After sitting alone in someone else’s room, reflecting well, receiving treatment well, and saying hello well, Kalian leaned on the window frame. I flew out of the dark shadows. She came to see Duke Siegfried.

The long night passed like that.

And four more days passed.

Kalyan did not return to the palace.