Chapter 356

looks away.

okay. I turned away. I closed my eyes, covered my ears, and kept my mouth shut. I did that because I did not know how to live life otherwise.

I lived knowing that.

I believed and lived like that.

That’s how I lived.

I lived according to what I saw, heard, and learned. I did it because I knew that if I lived like that, that was life.

“Are you saying it wasn’t a rose?”

I wonder if it was a rose that bloomed. Was it right to live life without being able to answer that simple question? Unable to answer that easy question, I asked as if I was walking through a dream.

“Is that what you think?”

“Are you actually asking me?”

Randel’s eyes turned to his feet.

I looked down at the long sword that had fallen as if blocking my steps.

I looked down at the thick red blood droplets that followed the tip of the sword.

– Kalyan. no see.

It reminded me of the red blood drops that had once fallen on the table. It reminded me of the red blood that had just flowed from the lips that said the rose would bloom soon.

It reminded me of the red rose that had been cut and dropped by a pure white hand.

– Look at me. Not this.

Dark blue eyes look into the distance.

You notice a transparent window that was meant to be closed, not open.

A window that you never wanted to keep open, but now has no way of closing it. A chilly wind blew through the broken glass. Because it rained early in the morning.

“… It’s windy. They said it was going to rain.”

My eyes were dazzled by the fresh wind that came through the cracks. So I closed my eyes.

The wind blowing through the cracks that were broken arbitrarily dazzled my eyes, and I was enveloped in a deep blue abyss that I could only sink deep into and never recall again. I couldn’t overcome the pride and got caught.

That rose was small and unsightly.

That red, red rose.

It was so dazzling that I couldn’t bear it when I heard that it had withered in the rain, faded, and bloomed again before I knew it. My heart is cold. My mind hurts. I closed my eyes.

“So, just go back now. You’re tired.”

They say that the child who said the rose looked just like Annelucia has already disappeared. I want you to know that it is because so many people surrounding that child turn a blind eye. So now, please accept the facts.

It was an answer to my second brother’s cold request.

It was the answer to the blowing wind.

I understood and recognized that it might still be a turning away, but I was afraid that I might have closed my eyes again because I was not convinced, so Plantz, who was still standing upright on the carpet that was damp from his wounds, opened his mouth.

“I won’t come down until I get an appointment.”

“Are you saying you would accept my apology on my behalf? Even though I said I understood what you said.”

“That’s right.”

“Now why are you being so persistent all of a sudden?”

Randel opened his eyes that had been closed for a long time. After looking down at the red mass that had accumulated on the floor for a while, he continued speaking.

“I found out that the child had crumbled the rose that I had made. You said that you burned it.”

“I did.”

“I asked if the child was the same as before. Even after that, you did not tell me the truth.”

“I did.”

“Why are you suddenly revealing what you were trying to hide and why are you being so persistent?”

A small rose that bloomed while Calian was on Rosellita. The rose that Randel bloomed. It was Kalyan who destroyed it. And Plantz lied and said he got rid of it with his own hands.

Randel once asked Planz. Is the child the same Kalyan as before or is he now just Plantz’s younger brother? Even at that time, Plantz did not inform the truth.

Now Randel was asking the reason.

Why are they now suddenly revealing the fact that they tried to hide? Why are they only now demanding that we accept the truth and apologize?

I opened the window that was closed properly. why. suddenly.

“… Those who left must be remembered. Those who stay must be looked upon.”

I heard an answer.

“If you don’t know that something is gone even after you lose it, and you don’t know that it’s staying even after you keep it by your side. Because those who lived and are living will be forgotten. That life will be forgotten. You can’t erase it like that.”

I heard an answer.

A voice was heard, so small and thin that it was hard to hear. A voice was heard, like the end of the wind that had already blown.

“I was taught not to erase it like that. That’s why I know now. So before it’s too late, before it’s completely erased, remember and look at it. That’s what I said. Brother to brother.”

Red eyes filled with fully blooming roses, flowing blood, burning flames, and a life so filled were looking at the two brothers.

“So there’s no need to apologize on my behalf.”

Instead, don’t apologize.

“I’ll take it myself. I will.”n/ô/vel/b//in dot c//om

I will receive it directly.

Kalyan said so.

* * *

I cleaned up the overflowing blood stains.

All the broken windows were removed.

After removing all the spilled and broken stains and debris, the spring breeze blew into the clean, quiet room again.

– are you okay. Brothers may fight. Everyone lives fighting like that anyway. So it’s okay.

After coming back down to the lower level of the room where I was forcibly exposed to the wind

, I realized that if I got hurt in a fight, I could just treat it and if I did something wrong, I could get scolded.

There’s still more to be scolded for.

A voice was heard from Hina, who easily untied the bright red tie that had been fastened to prevent further bleeding. This was right after the white, round piece of magic stone, said to be made from mermaid tears, was placed in Plantz’s hand.

It’s hard to say anything anymore. It was a communication device made by magicians from Balkan who were very free while the vice commanders were away, so they could use it because our precious healer couldn’t speak during treatment. Of course, the price of purchasing the magic stone came from a treasury containing public funds in Balkan. If there is a shortage of public funds, Lemain will make up for it. If Lemain does not give, you can rob Plantz’s safe. If that is difficult, you can ask Calian’s safe to solve the problem, so it can be said to be a valuable result obtained by working hard at the auction without worrying about it. .

– Don’t you know that my wounds heal faster than others?

– know.

– Don’t you know what happens if you heal a wound while holding a piece of glass?

– I don’t know.

– sick.

– …… okay.

Hina, who was contemplating whether to throw away the red tie since it was soaked with blood, folded it with familiar hands and placed it next to her. I thought it would be better to just return the tie to its owner, who would clean it off with this much blood.

Then, with bold hands that could hardly be traced to any consideration for the patient, he rummaged through the torn wound, found numerous pieces of glass, and took them out one by one.

– It hurts a lot?

– it hurts.

– Hold on.

– …… okay.

Plantz frowned slightly, unable to tell which would hurt more: healing a wound while holding a piece of glass or pulling a piece of glass out of a torn wound. Hina, who saw this, heard a voice again.

– Why did you break the otherwise intact window?

-For not opening the door.

– If they won’t open it, you have to ask them to open it.

– I did it.

– Then you just have to wait.

– I waited.

– But why did you break the otherwise intact window?

– I can’t wait any longer.

– Then why did you leave the sword you were carrying and break it with your arm?

– It just so happened.

– That’s right. I guess you woke up with your arm. And then you got hurt like this… So. It hurts a lot?

– …… It’s bearable.

– yes.

While at Secretia, Hina carefully treated Chase’s mother, Louise. However, Arianne was usually next to him.

Is that why?

While I’m receiving treatment in my room in my own country, why do I keep thinking of my brother’s former brother, the King of the Sea Country, and that bastard’s betrothed? This is such a strange thing.

The thing sitting next to me was clearly an anesthetic that Veronica had made, but I was about to ask her why she wasn’t using it. Seeing that the sleeping pills work well, it seems like the anesthetics work well too. I wondered if it would be better to ask why they weren’t being used, but I thought it shouldn’t be asked, so I just left that out.

– Have they taken it all out now….

I couldn’t ask because I was afraid that if I asked about it, it would strain the small hands that were rummaging through the wound while saying this.

– ah. I guess they took it all out. It’s less than I thought.

-……I think he feels regretful.

-What do you regret?

– no.

– yes.

Hina smiled brightly as she cleaned up even the smallest pieces of glass that were barely visible to the eye. Plantz smelled the salt smell again and slowly closed his eyes.

Soon a familiar light seeped in and the gaping wound began to heal.

– Have you talked about everything you wanted to say?

– I didn’t share it.

– You went in here hurting like this, but you couldn’t even talk?

– I just did it. I didn’t share it.

I said everything I wanted to say.

However, there was no proper answer, so it was not a conversation.

– If you said what you wanted to say, you didn’t get hurt for no reason. That’s a good thing.

Hina, who understood what Planz meant, answered like this.

-Are you hurt anywhere other than your arm?

-I’m not hurt. I am.

– That’s a good thing too.

– I think the other two were hurt.

– is it so? The only one who showed any injuries was Hae-ha.

– I can not see. that.

Hina quietly nodded.

The warm energy continues to permeate me.

– that’s right. In fact, everyone has more invisible wounds.

– okay.

– Are you all hurt because of me?

– no. Just one person.

– Then, you will have to apologize to that one person.

Unlike Hina, Plantz shook his head.

– no. I couldn’t meet you.

– Then, be sure to do it the next time you meet.

– I wish so. It can’t happen like that. It can’t be.

Hina, who heard the enigmatic words, briefly raised her head and looked at Plantz. Then he lowered his head again.

– I think you’re already doing it.

I don’t even know who that one person is that I can’t apologize to because I can’t meet them. Even though I don’t know why we can’t meet. Even though I don’t know why we can’t meet up if we have to. Hina.

– If you can’t apologize, don’t create something else to apologize for. Then someday it will be okay.

He consoled the person who said he had made a mistake.

I consoled myself for things I couldn’t apologize for.

Without knowing anything. Hina.

* * *

That white and red rose.

“I thought there was only one white and red rose.”

The rose that blooms and withers.

“There are so many here and there. It blooms a lot and loses a lot. I guess that’s how it happened. Before I knew it, it was happening.”

There wasn’t just one rose that was sick, there wasn’t just one rose that wasn’t supposed to be sick, and it turned out that there were roses that weren’t roses in the mix. I didn’t know that so many roses would bloom and fall before I knew it.

Randel said nothing.

Instead of answering, Calian listened to the sound of the clock and opened his mouth again.

“Maybe it’s because I have so many older brothers. Even though I’ve retrieved almost every minute of my older brother’s memories, there are still things I don’t know.”

Calian, who patted his head and smiled weakly, continued speaking to Randel, who was still silent.

“It wasn’t a rose I knew I would cut, and it wasn’t a gift I knew I would give. I cut it and gave it to someone else. “I just thought you liked it.”

He said he didn’t know it was Anne Lucia.

“I wish I had known it was that kind of rose. I wouldn’t have urged you to look at it properly.”

If I had known that it was Annelusia, I wouldn’t have cut it off just to see me. I wouldn’t have given her a gift to cut it off. “Is that what you were trying to apologize for

? “I said I came to get it.”

“I have to do what I have to do and get it. Refreshing.”

Calian, who felt like his true identity had been revealed again with a gesture of his hand or a gift, answered. Face the truth, I had no intention of urging you. I’m sorry for urging you on. “You sound completely different from the second one.

”

“I think it’s not okay for Brother Randel to ignore the truth.” “

What do you think?”

“Actually, it’s not okay, but it’s okay anyway. “I.”

After that, he expressed his honest and honest feelings like this.

“I couldn’t even ask him to remember the person he lost or get to know the new person he met. Because it should become a natural thing. It’s not my fault, and it’s not Brother Randel’s fault.”

How can I feel sad and apologize for not being able to recognize that the person inside me has changed? Even if I recognized it, how can I call it a mistake if I can’t reveal what I recognized? It’s Randel’s fault

. It wasn’t his fault.

Of course, it wasn’t Calian’s fault either.

“But it was the real mistake you committed against me. The same mistake you committed. “That is.”

Calian raised the teacup and put it back down.

Also, because it was grapefruit tea.

If it turns out, Calian had once said that he really liked grapefruit. Calian, who laughed and added a silly suspicion, looked at Randel.

” That too. It’s okay if you don’t apologize. It’s okay if you don’t know.”

Is it really wrong for someone who has lived without learning how to consider mistakes as mistakes to not realize their mistakes? Is it really a mistake to make a mistake because you only know how to make mistakes? Is it really a mistake to make a mistake because you can’t live without making mistakes? Is it wrong?

Whether I committed it because I wanted to live or

because I didn’t want to die.

“It’s okay to keep not knowing. I’m serious.”

Is it truly that person’s fault for living a life where he had to hurt someone else to survive?

“Brother, please think about it yourself and apologize if you remember your mistake. I’ll wait. If you don’t remember me for the rest of my life, I will wait for you for the rest of my life. Until you apologize.”

The window that Plantz forcibly broke. The window that he broke for the old Calian and Calian. In fact, the window that he broke for Randel. I was afraid that

it might cut Randel’s flesh. It’s okay to walk out slowly, just walk out. “It’s okay if you don’t have to,” he said.

“I can’t forgive you. Even if you receive an apology. “I deserve an apology, but I don’t have the right to forgive you.”

Of course, I didn’t hide the fact that the old Calian left or cover it up. I couldn’t let the hurt I suffered from breaking that window while worrying about hurting the person inside the window be overshadowed. So.

“What if I never remember my mistake?”

Randel, who had been looking out the window for a while, asked this.

Calian, who was staring blankly at the garden outside the window, opened his mouth at a speed that seemed to be slower than the hands of a clock.

“It’s my fault, brother . I won’t and will wait. Even if you don’t think about it until you die.”

“While you wait. “You.”

“Like I said. It’s okay.”

“Actually, it’s not okay. “You said it was okay?”

“Yes. Because it’s something you have to get used to.”

Because you don’t have to have everything to be okay to live life.

“The white rose was in so much pain that the grapes that healed it helped the white rose get better, and the white rose got better because of the grapes that withered because the white rose was sick alone. Sometimes the rose gets sick again. Sometimes red roses hurt more than white roses. Live without being okay, live with being okay, live with being okay. “Living this way or that way is ultimately life.”

Because things that cannot be controlled are bound to happen eventually. You just have to get used to them.

Randel, who has buried the easy lesson of hating grapefruits in the depths of the abyss and has forgotten them, will forget it this time. Calian, who had taught me another thing I wish I had avoided, stood up.

“They say it will take three days to fix everything because they have to re-enchant the window. It won’t be cold, but it will be a little uncomfortable. Are you okay?”

“Okay.”

“If you feel uncomfortable with the window open, please come to my room. Cats come here sometimes. If you like cats, go to the 4th floor. The cat goes there often.”

“That’s it.”

“Yes.”

Calian answered lightly, slightly lowering his head. Then he turned around.

“A gift. Use it well.”

A voice followed behind Calian.

This time, Calian could not respond and just walked out of the room.

Knowing that the gift would not end up in the garden until he died. It was an obvious lie. Because it’s hard to find words to answer.