On the way to work the next morning, I call Liddie to remind her about the Zoom birthday party that evening for Charlotte.
Liddie groans. âWhy are we doing it so late? Thatâs right at Kaitlinâs bedtime, plus Iâm ovulating, so, uh, Alex and I have plans.â
âBecause it isnât late where I am, and one of us has to work. Also, gross.â
I pull into Hayesâs circular drive just as a woman who looks a lot like my sister walks out his front door.
âYour doppelganger is leaving Hayesâs house,â I tell her.
âIs it you?â she asks with a laugh. I suppose I set myself up for that one. All three of us Bell girls do look a fair bit alike. âMaybe you should ask yourself why heâs fucking someone who looks just like his assistant.â
âGiven how many women Hayes sleeps with, it was bound to happen eventually,â I reply as I hang up.
Hayes is already at the counter, waiting. âYour date looked just like my sister,â I say, placing his coffee in front of him. âExcept my sister would still be here telling you what youâre doing wrong.â
He takes his coffee and sniffs it, as if assessing for poison. âIt doesnât surprise me at all to learn a relative of yours is full of unsolicited advice. But if I did to your sister what I just did to the woman who left, sheâd be too exhausted to talk.â
A rusty muscle in my stomach clenches, but itâs been nearly a year since Matt and I broke up, and pretty much that long since I had sex, so I refuse to feel any guilt about my bodyâs innate response to Hayesâ¦as long as I never act on it.
âI can see where a night with you would indeed be exhausting,â I reply as he rises. âI bet you donât say please or thank you once.â
âYes, because men who say please and thank you during sex are generally referred to as customers.â
I fight hard not to laugh. A hint of a smile slips forth but I snatch it back quickly.
He hands me a Post-It note. âI need this taken care of.â
He walks outâno please, no thank you, not even a goodbye. I go to the office, drop my bag on the floor, and ignore the ringing phone long enough to read the Post-It he handed me.
Much to my relief, he doesnât ask me to remove a naked female from his bed, but he does want a reservation for Friday at a restaurant that books out a month in advance, needs me to fix the car he just drove away in, and asks about âbrochuresâ without giving me any hint what brochures heâs referring to.
I give in at last and call Jonathan. Iâve been trying to give him his space, but I have no idea how to proceed here, and Iâve been dying to hear about the ten-month-old girl theyâve already named Gemma. He promised me photos when he left and I havenât gotten a thing.
âHave you met her?â I demand immediately, bypassing all niceties.
âNot yet,â he says with a frustrated sigh. âThe orphanage is putting up one road block after another.â
Poor Jonathan. He and his partner waited on an adoption list for years before this came through. âIâm so sorry. Is there anything I can do?â
âNo,â he says, âbut we may end up here longer than planned. I hope thatâs not a problem on your end?â
I laugh ruefully, leaning back in the office chair and propping my feet on the desk. âIt might be a problem on your bossâs end. He hates me. Every time I speak, he has this look of utter contempt on his face. Itâs seriously making me wonder why we helped England out during World War Two.â
âWell, there was the whole bit about the Holocaust, and Hitler dominating Europe,â he says. âMaybe heâs like a boy with a crush, pulling your pigtails.â
âA guy whoâs slept with half the actresses in LA isnât that awkward with women, nor would he be interested in me in the first place.â
âDonât sell yourself short, Tali,â he says softly. âYouâre beautiful and smart and different from what heâs used to. And I think Hayes is a lot lonelier than he would ever admit, even to himself. Just donât sleep with him.â
Iâve only slept with two people in my entire life. I seriously donât understand why this keeps coming up. âApparently youâve missed the part about me hating Hayes, and Hayes hating me.â
âI havenât missed it,â he says with a small laugh. âIâm just not sure I entirely believe it.â
With Jonathanâs guidance, I manage to acquire the sought-after reservation and locate the missing brochures. The car must be dealt with later, on a surgery day when Hayes wonât need to leave the office.
From there, itâs a million phone calls about lips that donât âturn outâ enough and uneven skin, and itâs six by the time I leave. This whole Zoom party, suggested by my sisterâs psychologist, is feeling less likely to work out by the second. You can do it late, Dr. Shriner said, so you wonât have to rush home from work. Little does she know seven PM is not late when you work for Hayes Flynn.
I drive home, cursing the traffic and Mattâs billboard, and am only ten minutes from my apartment when the work phone buzzes.
Need tux, Hayes writes. Black not navy. Bring to office.
I groan aloud. Who the fuck decides he needs a tux this late in the day? I donât even know if he means a tux he already owns. That he potentially has tuxes in navy and black seems excessive, but minimalism isnât exactly Hayesâs style. And surely he canât expect me to rent one this late.
Is the tux in your closet? I ask, but obviously he canât be bothered to reply. What skin is it off his nose if I have to waste twenty minutes driving to his house to check?
With a heavy foot on the accelerator, I race back to his house and take the stairs two at a time to get to his room, which seems oppressively cold now that itâs free of clothes on the floor and women in the bedâno photos, no papers, no books, no TV. Jonathan said Hayes is not home much, but seriouslyâ¦the guy has to relax at some point, doesnât he? Other than his daily workouts with Ben and the hours he spends drinking, he takes no time for himself at all. Why is he working so hard if heâs never going to kick back and enjoy the spoils of war?
I find the tux in the back corner of his ridiculously large walk-in closet, hanging in a garment bag next to the navy blue and two others in varying shades of black, and take my best guess which pair of shoes he wants with it.
Itâs only once my task is done that I actually look around. Aside from the tuxedos and his extensive shoe collection, his wardrobe consists entirely of suits and button-downs. Not that I expected a lot of Hawaiian floral shirts or Booze Crooz 2015! tees, but Iâm starting to see a theme here. If Hayes was actually a robot set on earth to do nothing but inject filler and fuck, this is pretty much what his life would look like. And I know I have places to be, and heâs a millionaire with a closet larger than my entire apartment, but I stand for a second looking at it all. And feeling the tiniest bitâ¦sad for him.
Hayesâs office is a bit more of what I expected from his house: brilliantly modern, all gleaming ebony wood floors, white furniture, enormous windows.
And coldly imperious staff.
âSign in,â says the girl behind the desk without looking up. âWeâll be with you shortly.â
âIâm not a patient,â I say. âIâm just dropping off Hayesâs tux. Can I leave it with you?â
She finally deigns to meet my eye and then frowns. âWait,â she commands.
She hustles somewhere back in the office and a moment later returns with Hayes himself. In a navy dress shirt, top two buttons undone, he looks too hot to be real. Even if he were playing a doctor on a soap opera, Iâd still be yelling, âNo doctor is that good-looking!â at the TV.
I hand him the tux, which he accepts while his eyes flicker over me, head to foot. For once he doesnât seem to find me lacking.
âIs that everything?â I ask.
He cocks his head. âIn a rush? Certainly, youâve got time to give us a bit of that amazing British accent of yours.â
Iâd laugh if I wasnât so anxious to get home. My glance cuts over to the dour receptionist. âThatâs for your ears only.â
âNo accent. No pretending youâve disposed of my date,â he says. âIâm quite disappointed in this little exchange, Tali.â His voice is so low and seductive my stomach clenches in response. Iâm growing accustomed to the unfriendly, hungover version of Hayesâ¦but this one is a whole new ball game.
The receptionist watches him walk away with her brow furrowed, like she isnât sure what she just saw.
I guess Iâm not sure either. Hayes, briefly, didnât seem satanic at all.
I have to call into my sisterâs party from Hayesâs parking garage and am still late. My mother and Charlotte sit in an office at The Fairfield Center and Liddieâs in her living room in Minnesota. Dr. Shriner said this would help ânormalizeâ birthdays without my father, but thereâs absolutely nothing normal about seeing my pale, miserable sister and tired mother in an almost empty room while I fake good cheer from a parking garage.
âI got the gift card and the books,â Charlotte tells me. âThanks a lot.â Sheâs been there for months but sheâs still faking her happiness. I can tell.
âWhen I come home, weâll go shopping,â I promise. âWith what Iâm earning at this job, it wonât even have to be on sale.â
âI still canât believe heâs paying you that much,â Charlotte says, shaking her head. âLike, what do you even do?â
Liddie rolls her eyes. âLook at her. Sheâs got no body fat and a mouth made for blow jobs. Iâm pretty sure we all know what heâs hoping sheâll do.â
âLydia, thatâs inappropriate,â my mother scolds, with a hint of a Iâm on my third glass of wine slur, which wouldnât be an issue if she were a little closer to home than she is at present.
âIâm not saying sheâll do it,â Liddie says. âThough I probably would if I were her. Have you seen the guy?â
âLiddie!â my mother and I shout at the same time. My mother reaches over to cover Charlotteâs ears, as if sheâs still a toddler who might have missed whatâs already been said.
âMom, Iâm seventeen,â Charlotte protests. âI know what a blow job is.â
âWell, you shouldnât,â my mother replies stonily, folding her arms across her chest. âCan we please try to make keep this conversation decent? Tell us about your day, Charlotte. Dr. Shriner says there was a party.â
Charlotteâs shoulders hitch and she doesnât meet anyoneâs eye as she runs her fingers through hair the same color as mineâgolden brown, streaked with hints of caramel and strawberry blonde. âThere was a cake,â she says, her voice flat. âAfter art. But it was chocolate.â
Charlotte hates chocolate. A minor thing, but my throat swells, unexpectedly. Holidays and birthdays were always a big deal in our house, especially for Charlotte, the baby of the family. Sheâs too young to already be learning the way life narrows down to nothing as you grow up.
My niece launches herself in front of the camera and conversation turns from Charlotte to Kaitlinâat age three, the new baby of the family. âIâd better go,â sighs Liddie. âIâve got to put Kaitlin to bed.â
I suspect sheâs holding me responsible for the hour and feel a pinch of irritation. âCanât Alex do it?â
âShe only wants me,â Liddie says.
âSheâs spoiled,â my mother replies. âThatâs why you need to have another kid.â
Itâs the wrong thing to say to Liddie right now. âWow, Mom,â she says. âAny other sage advice?â
I watch as Charlotte sinks further into her chair. Has this Zoom call made her feel less alone or more alone? Sheâs supposed to be going home at the end of August. Iâd like to tell myself life will improve for her there, but as I listen to Liddie and my mother argueâthe guest of honor forgotten completelyâitâs hard to believe itâs true.