Chapter 57: 57 Dinnertime

It was dinner time and I changed into something less comfortable. Not only to look presentable, also to be careful to not show too much skin. Igétas and I might be fighting, but I don’t want him flying off the handle if one of the wolves stares too long at my exposed skin. He has Vasil under control, but we have been separated for some time now.

Entering the canteen, I look at the empty seat next to my mate. He sits alone on the podium.His eyes are already on me. Even when we are keeping our distance from each other, I still feel our mating bond. Our eyes meet, I shake my head, looking at the big room filled with tables and benches. I am early, so I’m not surprised to see a lot of seats empty. I do see Amanda, and before I know it, I’m taking a seat opposite from her.

“Are you okay?” I ask and she nods.

“Yes, I did what you said and I feel better now.”The Alpha and Yolanda aren’t here yet.

“That is good. So you’re feeling better?”

“No, the feeling isn’t gone, however now I know the reason and that helps.”

We talk a little about my mother’s phone call until Ela arrives and takes a seat next to Amanda. Sweaty Chris and Zack are making a “Violet-sandwich”, making me feel small between the two wolves. I feel Igétas staring, and I think he must have growled or mind linked because the two men shuffle a little away from me. I am thankful for the gesture. Chris does smell bad, and I don’t see myself enduring the big wolf’s smell.

The cooking staff comes and sets down an amazing dinner. After a few words from the Alpha, we eat. He doesn’t address the fact that most of the warriors are gone. I also understand why Chris and Zack join our table. I don’t eat as much as werewolves and only can handle human portions. Ela and Amanda are eating a lot, but it’s stillhalf of what the two men can hunker down. I smile to myself and listen to Ela explaining some sort of technic survival thingy. I don’t understand it.

When almost everyone is finished, the room begins to fill with more pack members. The Alpha must have contacted them.

“Thank you all for coming, I have big news to share…” He talks about the rogue attacks and about the team who is shadowing the rogues. They were indeed in the gas station. Our assumption was correct. The team is still counting the rogues and the plan will remain the same. They will attack tomorrow at 1.00 PM. We all need to be on high alert. There will be no training tomorrow and children will be in the packhouse all day long. Some pack members had questions, but the Alpha shut them down by telling them that he has it under control and by this time tomorrow, the threat will be gone.

We all leave the canteen. I can feel Igétas nearby. I turn around and see him looking at me with longing in his eyes. I know that look. I see it every time I look in the mirror. I walk to him, wrapping him in my arms.

“I am still mad at you.”

“You have every reason to be.”

I shake, my feelings coming to the forefront, while Igétas leads me to a closet with some cleaning supplies. When he closes the door, I break down crying.

“I don’t want this! You are doing this! You need to stop this!” I sob in his shirt and pound on his chest with my fist. It must be nothing more than a tickle for him.

“I know. Listen Violet…” He takes my head in his hands and makes me look at him.

“You will not experience the heat again. I won’t let it happen. I need you to trust me. Can you do that?”

I look at his firm facial expression. He is serious.

“How would you know? Why don’t you mate me now?”

I see Vasil shining through his eyes. “Now isn’t the right time, but I promise you won’t go through heat again.”

I don’t know what to believe. He can’t know when the ticking time bomb will go off.

“I want to trust you. But how can you sure you will be on time?”

He holds me against him. “I will, I promise. Come home with me?” He asks and I shake my head.

“I trust you, also this isn’t some little fight. I can’t survive another heat.”

“You won’t be in heat.” He tells me.

“You can’t know that!” I shout, and he gives me a small smile.

“I do. Come home with me.” He whispers.

I want to, and I can’t at the same time. I walk out of the closet. He isn’t telling me everything and I don’t like it. I need to trust him, and he doesn’t trust me with the whole truth.

Some people look at me with empathy, some aren’t as kind and I can see them roll their eyes. Tears still stream down my face, and I let them, not caring who sees. I have learned over time that it is almost impossible to have secrets in a werewolf community. Ela sees me and seems to want to come to me, but I wave her away. She is my friend, but still a minor. She doesn’t need to hear my relationship bullshit.

I take my sweet time going to bed. Being drained from my little meltdown helps me fall asleep quickly.

I want today to be over; I want the threat to be over. I want Igétas to claim me as his. Is it too much to ask to live in peace, happily with each other and with the pack?