112 - Decisions

“Let her get something on my tab. I’m going for a walk.” Theo instructed. Eva nodded.

He left Annie at the Guild, and abruptly ended the tour there. He turned around just before he reached the door. “I’ll be in touch, and you can pass me messages through Eva.” He said, an afterthought.

Without looking for her response, he all but sprinted into the trees.

Theo ended up at the clearing, and he wasn’t sure if that was his own desire, The Woods guiding him, or just pure coincidence.

Either way, he stood there at its edge, just looking at the motes of mana dancing around. He tracked the movement of one, and then another, as they budded and spread from plant to plant, before being absorbed into another.

They glowed, some brighter than others. He wondered if the brighter ones died first.

Theo sighed, shaking his head to clear it of thoughts. His mentor might be in potentially mortal danger, but how was he supposed to fix that? How could he bring them back safe and sound?

He sat down slowly, trying not to disturb the flowering herbs that could almost swallow him when cross-legged.

He craned his neck up, looking at the myriad stars above, twinkling in the night. He thought about the mana from prayers that made its way to the heavens. He wondered if every star was just a prayer, or mana that clumped together after a while in the cold (which Theo was getting well acquainted with in the moment).

Theo closed his eyes and shook his head. Sending his mana down, he connected with the earth for the first time in a while.

The sunrise chased away the stars and prayers, and Theo was still sitting in his original position.

He’d had a lot of time to think, but a lot more to think about.

And in amidst the motes of mana that so readily carpeted this place like suspended snowfall, it was easy to miss the glimmer of water that fell silently.

---

The sun set, as he stared at the clouds. He picked out shapes, making out what looked like a swirling storm of birds that disintegrated as the wind picked up.

He sighed.

“I’m sorry.” Jenny ran her fingers through his short hair, head in her lap.

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“S’not your fault.” Theo mumbled. “I just…I don’t know what to do. Or if there’s anything that I can do.”

“You don’t have to do anything at all. You’re not responsible for this, or for them. They might be your master, but there’s not much you can do to help.” Jenny gently reassured him, for probably the tenth time in the past hour. Her tone was blunter than it was at the start, worn smooth by the circles he thought in.

“Yeah, but that doesn’t make me feel any better.” He complained.

“It’s not like you could save them. All you can do is hope that they stay alive until Union City or the Colleges figure something out.” He stayed quiet, and Jenny thought for a moment that was him accepting the situation, before she came to her senses and realised that the man she knew would never be that reasonable.

“Theo, no. Don’t you dare.” She threatened.

He barely heard her, running through scenarios in his head. Etol was about a week away, probably less if he used Striding Wind to its fullest. And if-

A crisp sound echoed through the park. He slowly reached a hand up to his cheek. It stung.

Jenny cradled his head in her hands, rubbing where she’d just slapped him. “Theo, listen to me. I know what you’re thinking about and you can’t just run off and do that. Please. If they can capture The Dancing Wind, they’ll make light work of you. Don’t make me worry.” She pleaded, looking upside-down into his eyes. It took every fibre of his being to maintain eye contact, even as he wanted to look anywhere but the eyes of someone afraid of losing what they have.

Theo didn’t give a direct answer, as he felt his chest grow heavy. “I’m sorry. I’ll talk about it in therapy.”

Her eyes softened, and a shaky smile wriggled onto her face. She let out a breath, before raising his head and kissing him on the lips. “Thank you.”

And as she lowered him back down, as they settled into the comfortable silence of a pleasant day ending peacefully, he knew that he would, in fact, make her worry quite a lot.

Because he was going to save Sparrow. No matter what.

---

“That does sound quite stressful.” Sean sympathised, after Theo explained the situation. “It’s horrible, but you are not responsible. And as someone who has seen his fair share of these adventures, I can tell you that it’s much more likely you get yourself captured or killed alongside them, than it is to actually save them.

“I know you’re feeling guilty, and wondering if there’s any way at all to help them. The best way is to grow stronger, until they don’t have to worry about you.”

Theo nodded, and said his goodbyes to Sean.

He’d done plenty of growing already.

---

“Hey, just letting you know that I’m going to be away for a while, and I don’t know how long it’ll be until I get back.” Theo sat down at the bar, Alan already placing a beer in front of him.

Alan nodded knowingly, and for once Theo really appreciated how nice it was to not have to explain himself. It helped that he deliberately avoided saying why he was going to be away.

Alan didn’t question his incredibly vague statement, or at least if he did he didn’t make it his business.

“Any vague estimates to when you’ll be back?” The only thing Alan seemed to be considering was how to work around Theo’s availabilities (or lack thereof), and it was an attitude that was rather welcome right now.

“Two weeks to a month?” Assuming it took a week to get there and back, ideally it would lean more towards the two week side. Theo refused to entertain the possibility that he wouldn’t come back.

“Well, you’ll be back for the start of your second year at least. Where are you going?”

Theo answered truthfully.

“Just seeing a friend.”