Chapter Seventeen
Forcing myself out of bed and into the shower the next morning had only been possible due to the paranoia that I smelt like exploded chemical plant. I'd checked my phone and found messages from Callum and Dean confirming that they'd made it back okay and checking whether I was all right.
I hashed out a response that I'd made it back okay and scampered towards the showers with the balaclava still buried in my coat pocket.
In the shower I'd been too tired to cry. My chest shook with a few whimpers, but the tears never came.
No one had come to arrest me yet.
Walking to my first lesson, I was practically in a trance. My parents would be horrified when they found out what I'd done. I'd thrown my life away, completely, and for what? Because I was feeling a bit mopey that my friends didn't like me anymore.
I apologised when I walked into someone, before realising that had been their intention. Ethan was staring at me with so much anger in his eyes it was obvious he knew what had happened.
Maybe he was the one they'd sent to tell me that the police were on their way. At least I'd get to say goodbye. "I need to talk to you." He practically dragged me by the arm into the nearest empty classroom and shut the door.
My face hadn't given anything away yet. It was a mask of non-emotion, I was quite sure. I just felt a bit dead inside, really. "There was a memo sent out last night stating that there'd been an attack on Liliana's parents' chemical plant. They were asking us to see if it was anyone here that had been involved."
Tears gathered in my eyes. Of course they had. They knew it was someone here and Ethan knew it was me.
I was doomed.
Ethan stepped forward and his fingers dug into the tops of my arms. "What were you thinking?"
"I don't know, okay? I don't know. It was just stupid. I'm sorry." The tears were cascading down my face and there was nothing I could do to stop them. I hated crying in front of people and I ripped myself out of his grip to face the other way, wiping my eyes.
"It's your scholarship. You worked so hard this year and you're willing to throw it all away just like that?" He was right behind me and I desperately wanted to turn around and collapse into his chest. If I was about to be arrested then a hug from Ethan was definitely what I needed. But, I didn't. I probably didn't deserve it.
"I know," my nails dug into my arms. "I'm an idiot."
"You are an idiot. You're a complete idiot. You were gunning for a spot at a top ballet, you'd worked yourself up to being the best ballerina in this school and you've let it all go for some stupid prank?"
"Yes," I didn't have the energy to argue with him. I just wanted to go back to bed and curl up and cry. "Apparently yes."
"Stop being so pathetic!" He cried. I could imagine him throwing his hands up as he watched the bag of my sacked shoulders. "A position at a top ballet. Why don't you care?"
"I don't want to be part of a top ballet company." I dug my nails into my arms harder. "Coming to this stupid school has made me lose all my friends. I liked my life and now it's gone. I wish I'd never come here."
Ethan paused, "You're a great dancer."
My rage came fast and sudden and I shut my eyes, "Stop trying to project your failed dreams onto me. I don't want this. I'm going to jail, anyway, so it's not like any of this even matters. There's no need to make me feel even worse."
It was cruel and I shouldn't have said it, but I'd lost any care for anything other than going back to bed right now. Ethan shoved two pieces of paper into my hand before I left the room.
The first was the memo he'd told me about, the one asking for information. The second was another memo.
Disregard the message you just received. The request has been removed.
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New chapter! Let me know what you think :D
This is only a short one! I'm afraid the next couple are short ones, too. There's a bit of rapid-fire action coming up, so I'll probably update daily rather than every-other-daily for the next few!