I fell asleep but awoke later that night. The presence hadn't gone away; in fact, it was still there... and clearer than ever.
I was pivoted over on my other side, away from the wall unlike before. I hardly bit back my gasp of surprise as I opened my eyes to a head of black hair. It was somewhat below my chin, delicately brushing the bottom of it. Arms were tightly locked around my waist, drawing me against another warm body in a solid embrace.
It was Kade, of course, but I was so confused as to why he thought it appropriate to climb into bed with me. He had his face pushed against my chest and for some reason, I had my fingers entangled in his hair. My other arm circled his neck and pulled his face closer to me, like I'd dipped into a trance when asleep and went along with the whole situation.
My gown had somehow been pulled up, just below my breasts to expose my underwear. I nearly squealed, even though Kade was asleep and had seen me without clothes before. But I fancied it even less in this situation. I wanted to snatch the gown down again but his arms were wrapped around my waist just below the end of it. I couldn't get it past him even if I tried.
He breathed peacefully, however, his breath steady and warm against my chest. Any lower and he'd reach the hands off zone. I didn't want to disturb him from his rare placidness, though, even if it cost me my own dignity. It was the most serene I'd ever seen him, almost like just having someone with him soothed his nerves. Or maybe it was just me, not to sound egotistical or conceited of course. Maybe I was the one who actually tamed the beast inside of him, relaxing him in a way no one else could.
I lowered my face into his soft hair and realized how good he smelled. I never took the time to notice it before but he carried the scent of fresh soap, like a flowery smell almost. Then there was the slight hint of cedar that, when mixed with the flowery scent, provided an exotic aroma, one that easily brought a smile to my face.
I was becoming lost in something I should've been pushing away. Kade wasn't supposed to be there next to me, and I didn't know why he was, but I was adoring every second of it. I was savoring the moment like it'd be my last good memory.
He began to stir suddenly, taking in heavier breaths as some sort a sleepy moan escaped his lips. He pushed himself closer to me, tucking his face into my neck and wrapping an arm around my shoulders. I started to blush senselessly and felt my whole body become heated and tensed. My face was slightly next to his now, my form pressed against him and his bare chest with little to no space in between.
I was panicking but I didn't know why. Just a moment ago I was enjoying the moment but things were escalating a bit too quickly for me. I couldn't do anything about it, though; I was confined in Kade's arms and I still couldn't pull my gown back down.
What possessed him to do this?
I felt his breath against my neck, warm and tingly like before. His breathing was lower now but he continued to make noises, like small groans and a few light grunts. I could feel his heartbeat against my chest, a steady thumping that seemed to sync with mine after awhile.
He was so warm... and smelled so good. I didn't want to move, I was slipping into another trance and couldn't pull myself out no matter how hard I tried. My fingers became tangled in his hair again, my arms swaddled securely around him.
The arm he had around my shoulders had its hand settled on my left shoulder. But it suddenly moved downward and took the sleeve of my gown with it, enough to reveal my bra strap and part of my chest. I gasped, now realizing how loosely fitted the gown was and tried to pull the sleeve back up, but it was trapped under Kade's hand. He showed no signs of moving it, either.
I tried to squirm and free myself just enough to fix my situation, only managing a tighter hug from Kade. His arms constricted and he groaned, literally squishing me as far against him as possible. I wasn't necessarily uncomfortable, it actually felt nice to have him hold me so intimately. However, I wasn't so sure about how well this whole thing would end. I wouldn't be to blame, of course, he was the one who crawled into bed with me.
I sat staring for awhile, unsure of what to do since I couldn't fall asleep again. Kade, apparently unable to find a proper position, started to shift once more minutes later, sighing softly as he did. His breathing started to become heavy, to the point where he was practically panting against my neck. Somehow in some way, his face ended up on the pillow next to mine. Our foreheads touched and I was no longer breathing fully. My heartbeat was fast but the air never escaped my body, not in the way it should at least.
Eyes wide, I could only focus on his peacefulness, the way his eyelashes rested gently against his cheeks and the way his hair laid just above his eyebrows. His lips were parted slightly, allowing me to feel his breathing against mine. My eyes stayed fixated on them longer than anything else and my only thought was, "this is my chance".
I couldn't bring myself to do it, though. Something told me it was wrong just to pounce on him while he slept. But wasn't that what he did to me? Would it be stupid of me to kiss him?
I bit my lip and groaned. No one would interrupt us this time, I was sure of that, so why hadn't I already done it? Just do it, Bella!
I chewed into my lip while also staring at his with desperation. I wanted to, oh how I did, but it was like a wall stood between me and him, even though he still had me drawn against him. I wanted to taste him, I wanted to know what it felt like to kiss someone you-
What? What was I about to say? Did I really feel my lips form around the word "love"? Did I... did I really love Kade?
It was like I opened my eyes for the first time and noticed how oblivious I'd been to my own feelings. I did. I really did love Kade. Why had I never realized something so obvious before? Why had I ignored a feeling that had been swimming so carelessly inside of me for so long?
I stopped biting my lip and focused real hard on the face in front of me. If I was going to leave soon, then why waste the little time I had left?
The arm I had around Kade's neck tensed and my fingers tangled in his hair even more. I kicked down the stubborn wall and smashed my lips against his so passionately, he was sure to wake up. And he did, hell yeah he did.
He sat up slightly, keeping his eyes closed and moaning in surprise. I squeezed my eyes shut and kept my arms snaked around his neck as he leaned over me and fell into what I just gave him.
I said I wanted to taste him and boy did he taste good. I never thought a kiss could be so hot, so spontaneous that it'd make your heart flutter almost right out of your chest. Mine pounded like a drum, thumping against Kade's chest as he remained hovered over me.
It was like my senses opened up and my thoughts became clear. I knew what I wanted and I was right under it. The room seemed to light up just as my realization peeked through. I had wasted so much time for something so thrilling.
Kade's hand rested on my hip while the other stayed further up my stomach. I could tell he was enjoying the kiss just as much as me, considering he showed no signs of pulling away. In fact, he was the one who turned it into a French kiss. My heart really thumped then, my head becoming so light I couldn't even remember what two plus two was. Unlike his brother and Salazar, his kiss held meaning, and his tongue wasn't just a sign of perverted lust.
He wanted me for me.
The kiss slowed and he breathed in my sighs like they were his only source of air. His hands gripped me like I'd slip away if he let go. I couldn't stop and I couldn't let go, either. This was something we'd both been waiting for for God knows how long.
The pleasured sounds he forced out of me nearly made me laugh; I'd never thought I'd hear myself do something like that, something my mom would slap me for since it was a "sinful" thing for a girl my age. My dad would probably kill Kade if he walked in on us like that. The thought only filled me with more humorous delight.
The light slowly dimmed as Kade pulled back slightly and we finally locked eyes. His forehead stayed connected with mine and the only air came from each other's breathing, which was heavy and coming out in pants. A small smile crept onto his face as he gazed down into my eyes.
"Quite rude to attack me in my sleep," he teased. I smiled in return and winked.
"You did say I was full of spontaneous actions."
"Touché. But I guess I asked for it."
"You did. What made you think I wouldn't kick you out of my bed when you crawled in?"
He brushed his lips against mine and looked down somewhere. "Is that even a question? I'm not stupid, Isabella."
"Well, excuse me, Kayden. Sorry for insulting you," I said.
His hand settled on my thigh as he sighed deeply. He planted a kiss on my neck and touched his forehead to my shoulder.
"Now you definitely can't leave," he whispered seriously.
"My family, Kade."
"I know... I know. But having you here... it's like... it's like..." He was at a lost for words but I knew what he was trying to say. Hearing his desperation broke my heart but I needed to get back to my family. I wanted to be with him too, though. Why couldn't I just have both?
"There are times where people shouldn't speak. I think this is one of those times," I whispered in his ear. It was my attempt at lightening the mood and it appeared to work. He pulled his head away from my shoulder and met my eyes.
"Is that your way of telling me to shut up?" he asked.
I groaned zestfully and rolled my eyes. "Yes, now kiss me already."
He took no time in doing so. This kiss, however, was way more passionate than the last, giving me the conclusion that this was going to be a long night.