Chapter 52: Inner Turmoil

STORM

~The fears we don’t face become our limits.~

I sat on a small hill outside the pack house. Apart from Freida, I was the only full-blooded witch there. Had I led them all to their doom? I pulled grass loose from the ground, pondering over everything. Had I led Keir straight to them? Am I the reason that they didn’t get enough warning?

I taught him everything he knows… Well, almost everything, I guess. Can they really defeat him? Or will this be another bloodbath like the rogues they faced years ago?

“Hey, you doing okay?”

I was so lost in my thoughts I hadn’t even noticed Axel sitting beside me. He was my pairing. The connection was there. But why did I get the feeling he wasn’t?

“I’m kinda nervous, Storm.” He looked at me.

I stayed silent, allowing him a chance to speak.

“Reign and I, my cousins, we grew up listening to these stories, you know? Diego and his Iron Soldier days. Pops’s right-hand man. Mom and her partying.

“How they all grew up overnight and took on all these rogues. How Mom went into death and brought everyone back. How Dad led the pack to victory and how he rebuilt everything after he got Mom back.

“And I can’t help but wonder: am I capable of doing the same? I am an alpha-born wolf. Do you know what that means?”

“It means…” I cleared my throat to remove the croak from not speaking for so long. “It means your wolf is bigger, faster, stronger. It needs to be, to lead your pack.”

Axel laughed slightly. “Exactly. I have all of those things, and yet am I meant to be alpha? What if something happens and I don’t know how to deal with it?”

“You’ll know.”

“How? How will I know? We’ve never faced anything like this before! We grew up in a freaking mansion, not the pack house!

“We’ve been sheltered our whole lives, and now we are just expected to be okay with this?!” He shook his head, playing with his hands.

I took a deep breath, gathering my thoughts. “You know, Axel, when I lost my parents, I didn’t think I could go on. Honestly, I didn’t see a point in it. I wanted to curl up and succumb to my injuries.

“I should be dead, but instead, I am here, facing the person who killed my family for what will now be a third time.

“The point I’m trying to make is: you guys have had a wonderful life to date—comfortable, without fear, full of love and happiness.

“Don’t you want to fight to keep that? Why are you giving up and throwing in the towel before anything has even happened?”

He looked out into the distance, lost in thought, but I continued.

“All I’m saying is, you get to fight alongside your family, and I don’t. The difference between us is you are fighting to keep your family safe and alive while I am avenging mine.

“Life isn’t always sunshine and roses, but you just have to ride the wave and hope that this storm will pass.”

“Thanks, Storm.”

I nodded silently as he got up and walked away. Was I right? Was this really why I was fighting? I’d only met these people a couple of weeks ago. Why did I care what happened to them?

~Because he’s your pair.~

~Is he, though?~

I sat for a bit longer and watched everyone. The wolves really did stick together. The respect for Kol as the alpha was powerful, but the respect the royals received was overwhelming.

The love truly ran deep in this pack; that was abundantly clear. So why did I feel like such an outsider? Why was I blaming myself for something that was out of my control?

~Am I actually feeling this? Or is someone else?~

I shook my head. I was imagining it. I was doubting myself like always. I was pretty sure if I wasn’t supposed to be there, the king would’ve had my head the day I walked through his castle doors. Axel was my pair. He was my mate.

His family was my family. That was why I was there. I watched as Diego and Gianna trained the pack members in different types of fighting combinations. I watched as the next generation imitated their parents by teaching the younger ones. The ones more adept at magic showed them how to try to avoid it, how they could tap into the full potential of their senses.

I’d heard it could sometimes be difficult for wolves to blend in around humans. Most of the time, they dulled their senses to avoid being overstimulated when they were in the human world.

I watched Axel try to find his place. He stayed close to Alpha Kol, almost imitating his every move, down to his stance, his aura.

There was no doubt he was an alpha-born wolf, but yet why did the movements look so uncomfortable and alien to him.

Alpha Kol was a skilled wolf and a seasoned fighter, not to mention he had the legendary Berserker streak in him. That just made him far more interesting as a wolf.

That gene was supposed to have died out with his great-grandfather’s generation, with them having hunted down the last of the Berserkers.

Berserker wolves were more bloodthirsty and a lot harder to control. Once one got killing, it was often difficult to stop them.

But to have one as an alpha was unheard of, and yet he controlled himself so well.

I’d seen glimpses of it, the flash across the eyes at the mention that his family, his pack, and his land were in danger. His self-control was admirable.

Not forgetting, of course, that he outright mentioned it at our first meeting. Does that mean his entire pack knows? And yet they respect him without fear. He is a good leader.

“Hey, what has you so lost in thought?” Reign plopped down beside me, gulping down some water.

“Just thinking about this situation and how we can overcome it.”

She flicked her hair over her shoulder. “We’ll be fine. We’re the Blue Moon Pack. There’s no one like us.” She winked at me

“Your confidence is refreshing.” I nudged her with my shoulder, smiling. I looked up at the sky, watching the dark clouds rolling in, the eerie silence as the fog drifted across the ground.

“I hope you can keep that confidence up.”

Reign looked at me, puzzled. “Why?”

I pointed to the sky just as bone-chilling howls rang through the air.

“Because he’s here.”