Itâs like this for a month. Four glorious weeks of illicit meetings with Ace behind closed doors. Always at my place because for some reason, Natalie is never around much anymore. When I see her on those rare occasions and ask her about it, she always gives me some off-hand excuse about classes and work and how she doesnât have a lot of time with her intense schedule, and I eventually stopped asking because I felt bad.
Iâm over here having the absolute time of my life, while sheâs working her ass off and I have major guilt.
But I donât feel guilty enough to stop because why would I? Ace Townsend is, frankly put, a sex god.
And heâs sex god.
His unwavering interest in me is giving me the self-confidence boost I never knew I needed. That this gorgeous, athletic, smart, everyone-wants-him man is interested in me and no one else?
Itâs heady stuff. His attention toward me makes me feel like I could possibly conquer the world.
When I came back to my home state to attend college at CU, I wasnât feeling that confident. More like I believed I was a complete failure. I left Colorado in the hopes to find a different life and I couldnât cut it.
I was low. Even feeling a little alone. My parents are in California. My sister took off and is living her best life as a devoted NFL girlfriend, and my brother is actually in the NFL. Theyâre living our parentsâ life while I felt like a giant fuck-up.
Well, not anymore. Now Iâm on top of the world. I have a handsome, sexy, successful man whoâs totally into me and Iâm doing well in my classes. And at my job.
Ugh, my job. I need to stop reminding myself.
Thatâs the only difficult part. The sneaking around and keeping our relationship under wraps. It hasnât been easy for Ace. Heâs offering up all sorts of excuses to his teammates and his roommates as to why he canât hang out or why heâs always leaving and I think itâs wearing on him.
I know it would wear on me.
Itâs almost a relief when he has an away game because then weâre forced not to see each other for a little while. Despite it being absolute torture and I canât stand being away from him for too long, itâs also a lesson in learning how to be adults and deal with separation in a mature manner.
Okay, that sounds like a load of crap, but Iâm trying to convince myself that Iâm growing up.
My biggest issue currently is lying to Gwen. Weâve become even closer these last few weeks and sheâs been telling me everything about her and Eric. Iâve become her relationship guru, which is hilarious because I donât know shit about having a real relationship, but Gwen has put all her trust and faith in me. Any bit of advice I dole out, she takes it. She believes in it. She believes in me.
And that hurts. It cuts to the bone. I watch her and Eric fall for each other harder as every single day passes, and Iâm jealous. They donât have to hide their feelings. Everyone can know, though I doubt very much Marilee is aware of itâor anyone else whoâs part of the athletic department administration.
There arenât any rules or clauses in the agreement that we signed that say they canât be in a relationship, so theyâre safe. Unlike me.
I want to tell Gwen the truth about me and Ace, but Iâm so scared that sheâs such a little rule follower, she might end up confessing our sins.
And I know I would get fired.
Itâs late at night and Iâm trying to concentrate on writing a paper thatâs due next week, but I canât focus for shit, so I give up and leave my room to grab a snack. I know thereâs ranch dip in the fridge and a new bag of potato chips on the kitchen counter, and while itâs almost eleven at night and the last thing I need is to consume a bunch of sodium before I go to bed, Iâm still creeping down the hall. Heading for the kitchen, I pause, an unfamiliar sound making me go completely still.
Whatâ¦what is that?
I crane my head toward the living room, my heart pounding in my throat. The lights are off. I didnât think Natalie was home yet but is thatâ¦is that her?
And is that noise Iâm hearing the sound of lips connecting. Parting. Reconnecting?
The rustle of clothing, a soft moan flits through the air and I realize someone is making out.
In our living room.
Feeling brazen, I march into the living room and reach for the nearest lamp, flicking it on. Sucking in a shocked gasp of horror when I see whoâs wrapped up around each other on our couch, their mouths fused, hands in each otherâs hair.
My roommate andâ¦
Big D?
They break away from each other at the same time, Natalie ducking her head against Derekâs barrel chest, while he grins at me, his cheeks ruddy. Like heâsâ¦what?
Embarrassed?
âYo, Maguire.â
âWhat the hell are you doing here?â I practically scream.
He lets go of Natalie and rubs at the corner of his mouth, contemplating me. âUm, whatâs it look like to you?â
Is he seriously the one asking me questions? Please.
âAre you two hooking up? On my couch?â I am screeching. And I sort of donât care because Iâm absolutely floored by this turn of events.
Natalie lifts her head, and I take in her flushed face and bright eyes. âWeâre not hooking up.â
âThen what would you call it?â
âKissing on the couch?â Derek offers. I glare at him and he goes quiet.
âI thought you hated this guy,â I say to Natalie, lowering my voice like weâre sharing secrets with him sitting right there.
âHey,â Derek protests, sounding offended.
âShush,â I tell him before I turn to Nat. âSeriously, whatâs going on?â
Natalieâs expression turns sheepish and she leans her head against Derekâs chest, a faint smile curling her lips. âWeâreâ¦dating.â
My mouth drops open. âYouâre kidding.â
âAfraid not.â
âYou donât got faith in me, Rubes?â
âOh my God, do not call me that,â I tell Derek. It sounds too close to pubes. âAnd no, I have zero faith in you. Youâre a player. Youâve said that from the moment I met you.â
âWell, Iâm a changed man thanks to Natalie.â He slings his thick arm around Natalieâs shoulders, nearly engulfing her as he tugs her close and drops a sweet kiss on her forehead. âWeâve been seeing each other for a month.â
A month?
âI think a little longer,â Natalie corrects him. âSix weeks?â
So basically as long as Ace and I have been seeing each other. This isâ¦
This is wild.
âWhy didnât you tell me?â I ask Nat, kind of hurt, though I have no right to be.
After all, I havenât told her much about me and Ace beyond that one initial hookup. I declared I was on a man ban and never brought him up again.
âI donât know. I was a little embarrassed. Not of you, babe.â She pats Derekâs meaty bicep. âJust of our situation. We both have reputations weâre not exactly proud of. Plus, we tried the fuck buddies thing last year and it sort of fell apart.â
âOkayyyyyy.â
âWe wanted to take this slow and make sure it would actually work before we made any big announcements,â Natalie explains. âI justâI didnât expect to tell you like this. When you catch us kissing in the living room.â
âI didnât know what was happening,â I admit. âI was just coming out here to get a snack.â
Her smile is rueful. âSorry.â
âHope it wasnât the bag of potato chips you wanted to snack on,â Derek says.
I groan. âYou ate them?â
He nods, looking guilty. âSorry. Nat brought me over here to feed me. Thereâs no food in our house.â
âThatâs not true.â Natalie nudges him in the ribs. âWell, heâs right about the lack of food at his place but we came over here because I forgot my laptop and I have a paper due in the morning.â
âAnd you got distracted enough to start making out on our couch?â
âAfter I caught him eating our chips.â She indicates the crumpled bag I didnât notice before thatâs discarded on our coffee table.
âDerek, you owe me a bag of Layâs Potato Chips,â I demand.
âYes, maâam.â He salutes me, jumping to his feet and offering his hand to Natalie. âReady to go, babe?â
She takes his hand and he pulls her up, hauling her into his arms, kissing her right in front of me. All lovey dovey and sweet and my goodness, my brain is confused by all of this.
Itâs Big D weâre talking about here. And Natalie. The two people I never believed could be serious areâ¦
Serious.
Who knew?
I watch them leave, trying to shove aside the weird emotions swirling inside me while they blatantly touch and flirt with each other right in front of me. What they have is what I want. What I wish I had.
With Ace.
The moment theyâre gone, Iâm grabbing my phone and sending Ace a text.
Me:
He answers almost immediately.
Acey Baby:
I smile, touched by his concern. I love thatâs the first thing he asks. He really is sweet.
And a complete savage in bed.
Lucky me.
Me:
Acey Baby:
Me:
Should I ask him to come over?
Yes. Yes, I should.
Me:
Acey Baby:
Me:
Acey Baby:
Me:
Acey Baby: